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Jasper Fforde

Jasper Fforde (born 11 January 1961) is an English-born Welsh novelist and aviator. He is the author of the popular Thursday Next series, as well as the Nursery Crime books.

Quotes

 * "Edward, Edward," he said with a patronising smile, "there are no unanswered questions of any relevance. Every question that we need to ask has been answered fully.  If you can't find the correct answer then you are obviously asking the wrong question."
 * Shades of Grey (2010), p. 206

The Eyre Affair (2001)

 * All page numbers are from the trade paperback edition published by Penguin Books, ISBN 0-14-200180-5, first printing
 * All italics as in the book

 * Like any other big government department, it looks good on paper but is an utter shambles. Petty infighting and political agendas, arrogance and sheer bloody-mindedness almost guarantees that the left hand doesn’t know what the right is doing.
 * Chapter 3, “Back at My Desk” (p. 18)

 * “It was a coincidence.” “I don’t believe in coincidences.” “Neither do I. That’s a coincidence, isn’t it?”
 * Chapter 8, “Airship to Swindon” (p. 82)

 * Don’t ever call me mad, Mycroft. I’m not mad. I’m just...well, differently moraled, that’s all.
 * Chapter 15, “Hello & Goodbye, Mr. Quaverley” (p. 157)

 * “James Crometty!” demanded Bowden. “Did you kill him?” “I kill a lot of people,” whispered Felix7. “I don’t remember names.” “You shot him six times in the face.” The dying killer smiled. “That I remember.” “Six times! Why?” Felix7 frowned and started to shiver. “Six was all I had,” he answered simply.
 * Chapter 16, “Sturmey Archer & Felix7” (p. 166)

 * “Haven’t I seen your face somewhere else?” “No, it’s always been right here on the front of my head.”
 * Chapter 26, “The Earthcrossers” (p. 248)

 * “It’s easy. A lobotomized monkey could do it.” “And where are we going to find a lobotomized monkey at this time of night?”
 * Chapter 27, “Hades Finds Another Manuscript” (p. 275)

 * The industrial age had only just begun; the planet had reached its Best Before date.
 * Chapter 32, “Thornfield Hall” (p. 318)

 * You’ve got a face longer than a Dickens novel.
 * Chapter 36, “Married” (p. 371)

Lost in a Good Book (2002)

 * All page numbers are from the trade paperback edition published by Penguin Books, ISBN 0-14-200403-0, first printing
 * All italics as in the book

 * I could almost see common sense and denial fighting away at each other within her. In the end, denial won, as it so often does.
 * Chapter 3, “Cardenio Unbound” (p. 35)

 * My father told me that for the most part coincidences could be safely ignored: they were merely that chance discovery of one pertinent fact from a million or so possible daily interconnections. “Stop a stranger in the street,” he would say, “and delve into each other’s past. Pretty soon an astounding-too-amazing-to-be-chance coincidence will appear.”
 * Chapter 4, “Five Coincidences, Seven Irma Cohens and One Confused Neanderthal” (pp. 48-49)

 * “He said you were very dangerous.” “No more dangerous than anyone else who dares to speak the truth.”
 * Chapter 5, “Vanishing Hitchhikers” (p. 60)

 * “We’re fine, Joff. You?” “Not that good, Thurs. The Church of the Global Standard Deity has undergone a split.” “No!” I said with his much surprise and concern in my voice as I could muster. “I’m afraid so. The new Global Standard Clockwise Deity have broken away due to unresolvable differences over the direction in which the collection plate is passed round.” “Another split? That’s the third this week!” “Fourth,” replied Joffy dourly, “and it’s only Tuesday. The Standardized pro-Baptist conjoined Methodarian-Lutherian sisters of something-or-other split into two subgroups yesterday. Soon,” he added grimly, “there won’t be enough ministers to man the splits.”
 * Chapter 6, “Family” (p. 81)

 * “Well,” he said thoughtfully, “it is my considered opinion that most coincidences are simply quirks of chance—if you extrapolate the bell curve of probability you will find statistical abnormalities that seem unusual but are, in actual fact, quite likely, given the amount of people on the planet and the amount of different things we do in our lives.”
 * Chapter 6, “Family” (p. 87)

 * Marriage, like spinach and opera, was something I had never thought I would like.
 * Chapter 7, “White Horse, Uffington, Picnics, for the Use of” (p. 93)

 * It wasn’t going to be hard—it was going to be impossible. It wouldn’t deter me. I’d done impossible things several times in the past, and the prospect didn’t scare me as much as it used to.
 * Chapter 10, “A Lack of Differences” (p. 124)

 * “Do you know what the worst bit about dying is?” “Tell me, Gran.” “You never get to see how it all turns out.”
 * Chapter 11, “Granny Next” (p. 136)

 * Mr. McGregor’s a nasty piece of work, isn’t he? Quite the Darth Vader of children’s literature.
 * Chapter 11, “Granny Next” (p. 139)

 * My father said it was a delightfully odd—and dangerously self-destructive—quirk of humans that we were far more interested in pointless trivia then in genuine news stories.
 * Chapter 12, “At Home with My Memories” (p. 141)

 * “You’re crazy!” “Undoubtedly. But look around you. You followed me in here. Who’s crazier? The crazy or the crazy who follows him?”
 * Chapter 23, “Fun with Spike” (p. 262)

 * “Don’t believe this,” murmured Miss Havisham. “It’s all poppycock. Her majesty is a verb short of a sentence.”
 * Chapter 25, “Roll Call at Jurisfiction” (p. 289)

 * “I’ll tell you what love is,” I told her. “It is blind devotion, unquestioning self-humiliation, utter submission, trust and belief against yourself and against the whole world, giving up your heart and soul to the smiter!”
 * Chapter 29, “Rescued” (p. 350)

 * “And nothing can stop it?” “Nothing I know of,” he replied sadly. “The best way to stop this is to not allow it to start—sort of a minimum entry requirement for man-made disasters, really.”
 * Chapter 32, “The End of Life as We Know It” (p. 377)

The Well of Lost Plots (2003)

 * All page numbers are from the trade paperback edition published by Penguin Books, ISBN 0-14-303435-9, first printing
 * All italics as in the book

 * Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.
 * Chapter 5, “The Well of Lost Plots” (p. 48)

 * “Write is only the word we use to describe the recording process,” replied Snell as we walked along. “The Well of Lost Plots is where we interface the writer’s imagination with the characters and plots so that it will make sense in the reader’s mind. After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or the smell of a warm summer’s breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer—perhaps more.”
 * Chapter 5, “The Well of Lost Plots” (p. 48)

 * “Books”—Snell smiled—“are a kind of magic.”
 * Chapter 5, “The Well of Lost Plots” (p. 49)

 * The atmosphere in the room was so thick with dramatic clichés you could have cut it with a knife.
 * Chapter 5, “The Well of Lost Plots” (p. 55)

 * Anything devised by man has bureaucracy, corruption and error hardwired at inception.
 * Chapter 9, “Apples Benedict, a Hedgehog and Commander Bradshaw” (p. 97)

 * The leader was identified by his dental records—why he had them on him, no one was quite sure.
 * Chapter 14, “Educating the Generics” (p. 136)

 * Preservation without expenditure is worthless.
 * Chapter 16, “Captain Nemo” (p. 157)

 * Failure concentrates the mind wonderfully. If you don’t make mistakes, you’re not trying hard enough.
 * Chapter 23, “Jurisfiction Session No. 40320” (p. 255)

 * Tyrants are all the same—shocking temper when they don’t get their own way!
 * Chapter 29, “Mrs. Bradshaw and Solomon (Judgments) Inc.” (p. 306)

 * No one had been more surprised than me by the arrival of the Great Panjandrum when I pulled the emergency handle. For the nonbelievers it was something of a shock, but not any less than for the faithful. She had been so long a figure of speech that seeing her in the flesh was something of a shock. I thought she had seemed quite plain and in her midthirties, but Humpty-Dumpty told me later he had been shaped like an egg. In any event, the marble statue that now stands in the lobby of the Council of Genres depicts the Great Panjandrum as Mr. Price the stonemason saw him—with a leather apron and carrying a mallet and stone chisel.
 * Chapter 34, “Loose Ends” (pp. 354-355)

Something Rotten (2004)

 * All page numbers are from the trade paperback edition published by Penguin Books, ISBN 0-14-303541-X, 2nd printing
 * All italics as in the book

 * Hamlet would worry about having nothing to worry about if he had nothing to worry about.
 * Chapter 2, “No Place Like Home” (p. 21)

 * “’Tis very strange!” he murmured, staring at the sun, trees, houses and traffic in turn. “It would take a rhapsody of wild and whirling words to do justice of all that I witness!” “You’re going to have to speak English out here.” “All this,” explained Hamlet, waving his hands at the fairly innocuous Swindon street, “would take millions of words to describe correctly!” “You’re right. It would. That’s the magic of the book imagino-transference technology,” I told him. “A few dozen words conjure up an entire picture. But in all honesty the reader does most of the work.” “The reader? What’s it got to do with him?” “Well, each interpretation of an event, setting or character is unique to each of those who read it because they clothe the author’s description with the memory of their own experiences. Every character they read is actually a complex amalgam of people that they’ve met, read or seen before—far more real than it can ever be just from the text on the page. Because every reader’s experiences are different, each book is unique for each reader.”
 * Chapter 2, “No Place Like Home” (p. 21)

 * Good evening and welcome to Evade the Question Time, the nation’s premier topical talk show. Tonight, as every night, a panel of distinguished public figures generally evade answering the audience’s questions and instead toe the party line.
 * Chapter 3, “Evade the Question Time” (p. 47)

 * Money had never been a problem in the Book World. All the details of life were taken care of by something called Narrative Assumption. A reader would assume you had gone shopping, or gone to the toilet, or brushed your hair, so a writer never needed to outline it.
 * Chapter 5, “Ham(let) and Cheese” (pp. 72-73)

 * If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher. Overlong, detailed to the point of distraction—and ultimately, without a major resolution.
 * Chapter 5, “Ham(let) and Cheese” (p. 76)

 * My father always argued that time was far and away the most valuable commodity we had and that temporal profligacy should be a criminal offense—which kind of makes watching Celebrity Kidney Swap or reading Daphne Farquitt novels a crime straightaway.
 * Chapter 8, “Time Waits for No Man” (pp. 96-97)

 * “Look here, St. Zvlkx,” said Volescamper as they walked towards the marquee for tea and scones, “what was the thirteenth century like?” “The Mayor wants to know what the thirteenth century was like—and no lip, sunshine.” “Filthy, damp, disease-ridden and pestilential.” “He said it was like London, Your Grace.”
 * Chapter 11, “The Greatness of St. Zvlkx” (pp. 124-125; in the book, the second and third lines of this quote are set in Fraktur).

 * “Humans are molded by evolution to be short-termists, Miss Next,” he continued. His voice rumbled deeply and seemed to echo inside my head. “We need only to see our children to reproductive age to be successful in a biological sense. We have to move beyond that. If we see ourselves as residents on this planet for the long term, we need to plan for the long term.”
 * Chapter 15, “Meeting the CEO” (p. 148)

 * Whatever. As far as I can see, there is one state of dead and that’s ‘not living.’ Now, do you have anything useful to add to this investigation or not?”
 * Chapter 27, “Weird Shit on the M4” (p. 238)

 * For centuries I’ve been worrying about audiences seeing me as a mouthy spoiled brat who can’t make up his mind about anything, but, having seen the real world, I can understand the appeal. My play is popular because my failings are your failings, my indecision the indecision of you all. We all know what has to be done; it’s just that sometimes we don’t know how to get there. Acting without thought doesn’t really help in the long run. I might dither for a while, but at least I make the right decision in the end: I bear my troubles and take arms against them. And thereby lies a message for all mankind, although I’m not exactly sure what it is. Perhaps there’s no message. I don’t really know. Besides, if I don’t dither, there’s no play.
 * Chapter 43, “Recovery” (pp. 371-372)

First Among Sequels (2007)

 * All page numbers are from the hardcover first edition published by Viking Books, ISBN 978-0-670-03871-8, 1st printing
 * All italics as in the book

 * The dangerously high level of the stupidity surplus was once again the lead story in the The Owl that Morning. The reason for the crisis was clear: Prime Minister Redmond van de Poste and his ruling Commonsense Party had been discharging their duties with a reckless degree of responsibility that bordered on inspired sagacity. Instead of drifting from one crisis to the next and appeasing the nation with a steady stream of knee-jerk legislation and headline-grabbing but arguably pointless initiatives, they had been resolutely building a raft of considered long-term plans that concentrated on unity, fairness and tolerance. It was a state of affairs deplored by Mr. Alfredo Traficcone, leader of the opposition Prevailing Wind Party, who wanted to lead the nation back onto the safer grounds of uninformed stupidity.
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 1; opening paragraph)

 * “The stupidity surplus,” repeated Landen as he sat down at the kitchen table, “I’m all for responsible government, but storing it up like this is bound to cause problems sooner or later—even by acting sensibly, the government has shown itself to be a bunch of idiots.” “There are a lot of idiots in this country,” I replied absently, “and they deserve representation as much as the next man.”
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 2)

 * How about this for a title: Men Are from Earth, Women Are from Earth—Just Deal with It.
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 3)

 * “Tell them ballocks.” “They’ll pay me five hundred guineas.” “Cancel the ballocks thing—tell them you’ll be honored and overjoyed.” “It’s a sellout. I don’t do sellouts. Not for that price anyway.”
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 6)

 * The first four in the series had been less a lighthearted chronicling of my adventures and more of a “Dirty Harry meets Fanny Hill,” but with a good deal more sex and violence.
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 7)

 * “Oh!” said Landen, reading a letter. “A rejection from my publisher. They didn’t think Fatal Parachuting Mistakes and How to Avoid Making Them Again was what they had in mind for self-help.” “I guess their target audience doesn’t include dead people.” “You could be right.”
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (p. 7)

 * “How is the book going?” I asked returning to my knitting. “The self-help stuff?” “The magnum opus.” Landen looked thoughtful for a moment and then said, “More opus than magnum. I’m trying to figure out whether the lack of progress is writer’s block, procrastination, idleness or just plain incompetence.”
 * Chapter 1, “Breakfast” (pp. 8-9)

 * I just had an idea for a cheap form of power: by bringing pasta and antipasta together, we could be looking at the utter annihilation of ravioli and liberation of vast quantities of energy.
 * Chapter 2, “Mum and Polly and Mycroft” (p. 18)

 * “I am surprised to see you because…you died six years ago!” “I did?” inquired Mycroft with genuine concern. “Why does no one tell me these things?” I shrugged, as there was really no good answer to this.
 * Chapter 2, “Mum and Polly and Mycroft” (p. 19)

 * “Dead,” muttered Mycroft with a resigned air. “Never been that before. Not even once. Are you quite sure?”
 * Chapter 2, “Mum and Polly and Mycroft” (p. 19)

 * “Incredibly enough, reality TV has just gotten worse.” “Is that possible? I asked. “Wasn’t Celebrity Trainee Pathologist the pits?” I thought for a moment. “Actually, Whose Life Support Do We Switch Off? was worse. Or maybe Sell Your Granny. Wow, the choice these days makes it also tricky to decide. Bowden laughed. “I’ll agree that Granny lowered the bar for distasteful program makers everywhere, but RTA-TV, never one to shrink from a challenge, has devised Samaritan Kidney Swap. Ten renal-failure patients take turns trying to convince a tissue-typed donor—and the voting viewers—which one should have his spare kidney.” I groaned. Reality TV was to me the worst form of entertainment—the modern equivalent of paying sixpence to watch lunatics howling at the wall down at the local madhouse.
 * Chapter 3, “Acme Carpets” (pp. 26-27)

 * “Listen to what it says in the horoscopes: ‘If it is your birthday, there may be an increased amount of mail. Expect gifts, friendly salutations from people and the occasional surprise. Possibility of cake.’ That’s so weird—I wonder if any of it will come true?”
 * Chapter 5, “Training Day” (p. 48)

 * I’d come to realize over the years that anything created by mankind had error, mischief and bureaucratic officialdom hardwired at inception, and the fictional world was no different.
 * Chapter 6, “The Great Library and the Council of Genres” (p. 54)

 * “What’s in Hangar One at the moment?” I asked the driver. “The Magus.” “Still?” Even the biggest refit never took more than a week, and John Fowles’s labyrinthine-plotted masterpiece had been in there nearly five. “It’s taking longer than we thought—they removed all the plot elements for cleaning, and no one can remember how they go back together again.” “I’m not sure it will make a difference,” I murmured as we pulled up outside Hangar Eight.
 * Chapter 11, “The Refit” (pp. 90-91)

 * But his hits were greater than the sum of his misses, and such is the way with greatness.
 * Chapter 11, “The Refit” (p. 97)

 * Noting with dismay that most cross-religion bickering occurred only because all the major religions were convinced that they were the right one and every other religion was the wrong one, the founders of the Global Standard Deity based their fledgling “portmanteau” faith on the premise that most religions want the same thing once all the shameless, manipulative power play had been subtracted: peace, stability, equality and justice—the same as the nonfaiths. As soon as they found that centralizing thread that unites all people and makes a dialogue of sorts with a Being of Supreme Moral Authority mostly optional, the GSD flourished.
 * Chapter 15, “Home Again” (p. 125)

 * “How is the faith-unification business?” “We’ve nearly got everyone,” said Joffy with a smile. “The atheists came on board last week. Once we had suggested that ‘god’ could be a set of essentially beneficent physical rules of the cosmos, they were only too happy to join. In fact, apart from a few scattered remnants of faith leaders who can’t quite come to terms with the loss of their power, influence and associated funny hats, it’s all looking pretty good.”
 * Chapter 15, “Home Again” (p. 128)

 * You’ll excuse me if I’m not convinced by your supposed altruism.
 * Chapter 20, “The Austen Rover” (p. 162)

 * “Friday may have tricked his parents, the SHE and half the ChronoGuard, but there’s one person no teenage boy ever managed to fool.” “And that is?” “His younger sister.”
 * Chapter 29, “Time Out of Joint” (p. 259; “SHE” is an acronym for “Standard History Eventline”)

 * Friday nodded and took a deep breath. “Has anyone noticed how short attention spans seem to have cast a certain latitude across the nation?” “Do I ever,” I replied, rolling my eyes and thinking of the endlessly downward clicking of the Read-O-Meter. “No one’s reading books anymore. They seem to prefer the mind numbing spectacle of easily digested trash TV and celebrity tittle-tattle.” “Exactly,” said Friday. “The long view has been eroded. We can’t see beyond six months, if that, and short-termism will spell our end.”
 * Chapter 30, “Now Is the Winter” (p. 264)

 * The Commonsense Party’s first major policy reversal of perceived current wisdom was with the scrapping of performance targets, league standings and the attempt to make subtle human problems into figures on a graph that could be solved quickly and easily through “initiatives.” Arguing that important bodies such as the Health Service should have the emphasis on care and not on administration, the Commonsense party forced through legislation that essentially argued, “If it takes us ten years to get into the shit, it will take us twenty years to get out—and that journey starts now.”
 * Chapter 31, “Spending the Surplus” (p. 268)

 * “You’ll forgive me for saying this,” said Webastow, looking over his glasses, “but this is the most harebrained piece of unadulterated stupidity that any government has ever undertaken anywhere.” “Thank you very much,” replied Ms. Yogert courteously. “I’ll make sure your compliments are forwarded to Prime Minister van de Post.”
 * Chapter 31, “Spending the Surplus” (p. 274)

 * A third faction who called them selves “simplists” argued that there was a single fundamental rule the governed all story: if it works, it works.
 * Chapter 33, “Somewhere Else Entirely” (p. 286)

 * Rescue seemed a very remote possibility, and that was at the nub of the whole ethical-dilemma argument. You never come out on top, no matter what. The only way to win the game is not to play.
 * Chapter 33, “Somewhere Else Entirely” (p. 303)

 * “I need to get home and have a long, hot bath and then a martini.” Thursday5 thought for a moment. “After you’ve drunk the long, hot bath,” she observed, “you’ll never have room for the martini.”
 * Chapter 36, “Senator Jobsworth” (p. 330)

 * “The ChronoGuard has shut itself down, and time travel is as it should be: technically, logically and theoretically…impossible.” “Good thing, too,” replied Landen. “It always made my head ache. In fact I was thinking of doing a self-help book for SF novelists eager to write about time travel. It would consist of a single word: Don’t.”
 * Chapter 38, “The End of Time” (p. 350)

One of Our Thursdays is Missing (2011)

 * All page numbers are from the hardcover first edition published by Viking Books, ISBN 978-0-670-02252-6, 1st printing
 * Italics and grammatical solecisms as in the book

 * About ten degrees upslope of Fiction, I could see our nearest neighbor: Artistic Criticism. It was an exceptionally beautiful island, yet deeply troubled, confused and suffused with a blanketing layer of almost impenetrable bullshit.
 * Chapter 1, “The BookWorld Remade” (p. 13)

 * To a text-based life-form, unpredictable syntax and poor grammar is a source of huge discomfort. Ill-fitting grammar are like ill-fitting shoes. You can get used to it for a bit, but then one day your toes fall off and you can’t walk to the bathroom. Poor syntax is even worse. Change word order and a sentence useless for anyone Yoda except you have.
 * Chapter 2, “A Woman Named Thursday Next” (p. 20)

 * I didn’t know much about Conspiracy, but I did know that its theorists were mostly paranoid and tended to value conviction above evidence.
 * Chapter 5, “Sprockett” (pp. 46-47)

 * To fail spectacularly is a loser’s paradise.
 * Chapter 12, “Jurisfiction” (p. 124)

 * The good thing about being in the BookWorld is that we aren’t hampered by anything as awkward as physical laws. The RealWorld must be hideously annoying to do science in.
 * Chapter 19, “JurisTech, Inc.” (p. 172)

 * “It’s highly disorderly,” he explained, “not like here. There is no easily definable plot, and you can run yourself ragged wondering what the significance can be of a chance encounter. You’ll also find that for the most part there is no shorthand to the narrative, so everything happens in a long and painfully drawn out sequence. Apparently the talk can be confusing—for the most part, people just say the first thing that comes into their heads.” “Is it as bad as they say it is?” “I’ve heard it’s worse. Here in the BookWorld, we say what needs to be said for the story to proceed. Out there? Well, you can discount at least eighty percent of chat as just meaningless drivel.” “I never thought the percentage was that high.” “In some individuals it can be as high as ninety-two percent. The people to listen to are the ones who don’t say very much.”
 * Chapter 19, “JurisTech, Inc.” (p. 179)

 * “Bipedal movement is the skill of controlled falling,” said Square. “If it weren’t so commonplace, it would seem miraculous—like much out here, to be truthful.”
 * Chapter 20, “Alive!” (p. 186)

 * Humans are more or less identical except for a few peculiar habits generally delineated by geographic circumstances and historical precedent. But essentially, they’re all the same and reading from the same rule book. To get along you have to appreciate the rules, but also know that other people know the rules—and that they know that you know the rules. Get it?
 * Chapter 20, “Alive!” (p. 189)

 * “Did she believe you?” “She’s an excellent journalist—of course not.”
 * Chapter 21, “Landen Parke-Laine” (p. 205)

 * Mrs. Next came back into the room. “You never told me you’d bought a gold-plated toilet.” Landen frowned. “We don’t have a gold-plated toilet.” “Oh, dear,” said Mrs. Next. I think I’ve just peed in your tuba.”
 * Chapter 21, “Landen Parke-Laine” (p. 205)

 * “Why didn’t he say so directly?” asked Sprockett, not unreasonably. “This is Fiction,” I explained. “The exigency of drama requires events to be clouded in ambiguity.”
 * Chapter 28, “Home Again” (p. 249)

 * The idea that people actually do this because they like it strikes me as double insanity with added insanity.
 * Chapter 39, “Story-Ending Options” (p. 339)

 * Sprockett buzzed briefly to himself. “Does that sort of thing happen out there in the RealWorld, or is it just in books?” I thought for a moment. Of the untidy chaos I had seen in the RealWorld; of not knowing what was going to happen; of not knowing what, if anything, head relevance. The RealWorld was a sprawling mess of a book in need of a good editor. I thought then of the narrative order here in the BookWorld, our resolved plot lines and the observance of natural justice we took for granted. “Literature is claimed to be a mirror of the world,” I said, “but the Outlanders are fooling themselves. The BookWorld is as orderly as people in the RealWorld hope their own world to be—it isn’t a mirror, it’s an aspiration.”
 * Chapter 41, “The End of Book” (p. 359)

The Woman Who Died a Lot (2012)

 * All page numbers are from the hardcover first edition published by Viking Books, ISBN 978-0-670-02502-2, 1st printing
 * Italics as in the book

 * Everything comes to an end. A good bottle of wine, a summer’s day, a long-running sitcom, one’s life, and eventually our species. The question for many of us is not that everything will come to an end but when. And can we do anything vaguely useful until it does?
 * Chapter 1, “Monday: Swindon” (p. 1)

 * Sadly, a lifetime in law enforcement tends not to create a bunch of grateful villains happy that you have shown them the error of their ways, but rather a lot of disgruntled ne’er-do-wells eager for payback.
 * Chapter 1, “Monday: Swindon” (p. 9)

 * Having to mix with dimwits is hideously boring. Great-Uncle Mycroft put it best when he said that for a genius this planet is excruciatingly dull, only made briefly more illuminating when another genius happens along.
 * Chapter 7, “Monday: Tuesday” (p. 60)

 * “It’s simply part of wider research on a neural expansifier that increases the synaptic pathways in the brain. Aside from repairing traumatic damage and reversing the effects of dementia, it can potentially make dumb people smart.” “I’m trying hard, but I’m not sure I can think of a more useful invention.”
 * Chapter 7, “Monday: Tuesday” (p. 63)

 * “Do I have to talk to insane people?” “You’re a librarian now. I’m afraid it’s mandatory.”
 * Chapter 22, “Wednesday: Library” (p. 179)

 * I don’t think God has any more idea than you or I about what’s going on.
 * Chapter 35, “Thursday: Evening” (p. 298)

 * “Think of it this way: A single brain cell has no intelligence, but in company it can do extraordinary things. Perhaps the entirety of existence is the true, unifying intelligence that drives what occurs—for a reason that is quite beyond our understanding, or even to a higher plane where the concept of understanding is laughably redundant.” It was an interesting concept. Mycroft had often theorized that the whole of existence was so large and hideously complex that it must be sentient. And if this were so, then it must have a truly warped sense of humor and have an abiding love of math and hydrogen—and a deep loathing for order.
 * Chapter 35, “Thursday: Evening” (p. 298)

title: Jasper Fforde


text:
User talk:138.88.211.243

~ Kalki 04:07, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: User talk:138.88.211.243


text:
User talk:24.151.129.28

- InvisibleSun 04:10, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:24.151.129.28


text:
User talk:160.39.247.117

~ Kalki 04:11, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:160.39.247.117


text:
Talk:Lynne Cheney

Erroneous quotation
This article originally contained the following quote, which was stated to be from Cheney's book Telling the Truth (1995): "Public figures tell us one thing today and another tomorrow, and blithely accuse those who point out the inconsistencies of an excess of literalism." It turns out, however, that the quotation is from a publisher's advertisement for the book, as seen here. The quotation was therefore deleted from this article. - InvisibleSun 05:53, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: Talk:Lynne Cheney


text:
User talk:Phonophonic~enwikiquote

~ Kalki 08:11, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Phonophonic. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Phonophonic~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:32, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:54, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Phonophonic~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:UKLOUISE

I recently edited and formatted some of the recent additions made to the Rudolf Hess page. The two remarks that you have just re-added I had removed because they don't provide much context, or don't seem to actually be about Hess, but about the actions of Eugene K. Bird without much clear indication of how they relate to Hess. With a bit more quotation of Bird's statement that might become more evident, but their relation to Hess as currently added is extremely obscure. ~ Kalki 08:23, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:UKLOUISE


text:
Amedeo Modigliani

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani (12 July 1884 – 24 January 1920) was an Italian painter and sculptor who pursued his career for the most part in France. Influenced by the artists in his circle of friends and associates, by a range of genres and movements, and by primitive art, Modigliani's oeuvre was nonetheless unique and idiosyncratic.

Quotes

 * Every great work of art should be considered like any work of nature. First of all from the point of view of its aesthetic reality and then not just from its development and the mastery of its creation but from the standpoint of what has moved and agitated its creator.
 * Attributed without citation at The Art Story.

 * The function of art is to struggle against obligation.
 * Attributed without citation at History of Painters

 * With one eye you are looking at the outside world, while with the other you are looking within yourself.
 * Attributed without citation at History of Painters

Quotes about Amedeo Modigliani

 * There's no doubt but that without this liberté, égalité and fraternité there could not have been a Monet, Modigliani, Picasso, or Giacometti.
 * Ollie Harrington, Why I Left America and Other Stories (1994)

title: Amedeo Modigliani


text:
Mount Everest

Mount Everest or Qomolangma or Sagarmatha or Chomolungma pronounced as (Jongmalunga) is the highest mountain on Earth, as measured by the height of its summit above sea level. The mountain, which is part of the Himalaya range in High Asia, is located on the border between Nepal and China.

Quotes

 * If the reason for climbing Mt. Everest is that it's hard to do, why does everyone go up the easy side?
 * George Carlin, Napalm & Silly Putty (2001), p. 45

 * We have for some years known that this mountain is higher than any other hitherto measured in India, and most probably it is the highest in the whole world. I was taught by my respected chief and predecessor, Colonel Geo. Everest, to assign to every geographical object its true local or native appellation. I have always scrupulously adhered to this rule, as I have in fact to all other principles laid down by that eminent graduist. But here is a mountain, most probably the highest in the world, without any local name that we can discover, or whose native appellation, if it have any, will not very likely be ascertained before we are allowed to penetrate into Nepal and to approach close to this stupendous snowy mass. In the mean time the privilege, as well as the duty, devolves on me to assign to this lofty pinnacle of our globe, a name whereby it may be known among geographers and become a household word among civilized nations. In virtue of this privilege, in testimony of my affectionate respect for a revered chief, in conformity with what I believe to be the wish of all the Members of the scientific department, over which I have the honour to preside, and to perpetuate the memory of that illustrious master of accurate geographical research, I have determined to name this noble peak of the Himalayas "Mount Everest."
 * Andrew Waugh, who named the peak, previously designated Peak XV, as "Everest", in a report (1 March 1856), publicly read on 11 May 1857, and published in "Papers relating to the Himalaya and Mount Everest" in Proceedings of the Royal Geographical Society of London, Vol. I (1857), p. 346

 * You will perceive the gist of the question is not whether the mountain should be called Mount Everest or by its true native name (which is a principle not disputed by any one), but whether it can be called Deodanga without risk of error, in the absence of satisfactory proof that this is really its native name.
 * Andrew Waugh, in a report on Mounts Everest and Deodanga (11 January 1858), published in Proceedings of the Royal Geographical Society of London, Vol. II, No. 1 (January 1858), p. 105

 * A symmetrical, beautiful snow cone summit.
 * Sir Edmund Hillary who with Tenzing Norgay became the first people known to reach the summit of Mount Everest. As quoted in "On This Day : 29 May" at BBC

title: Mount Everest


text:
Talk:Rudolf Hess

Hess and Bird
Recently many unformatted quotes were added to this article — I formatted most of these properly and retained them, added a few myself, along with images, but removed two statements by Philip K Bird, which provided little clear indication as to why these comments by Bird are very notable or in what particular ways they might be about Hess. Properly formatted they are as follows:

 * I motioned everyone out and said 'leave me alone with him!'
 * Col. Bird speaking to the guards regarding a crisis which had arisen in Rudolf's Hess's cell at Spandau Prison.

 * 'I drew the chair up closer to the bed and spoke in a low, calm voice'.
 * Col Bird on attempting to persuade Rudolf Hess to accept a visit from his family.

No indication is made as to what particular crisis had arisen, or why Bird's first exclamation is of much significance in relation to Hess, nor why a quotation by Bird about his speaking to Hess in a low calm voice is of any relevance either. The quotes should be about Hess, not the composure or discomposure of those attending to him in Spandau Prison.

This edit was objected to with another poorly formatted post to the external links section:

 * Bold textThe comments that keep getting 'chucked' out are from Eugene Bird's book 'THE LONELIEST MAN IN THE WORLD'!! And are absolutely relevant to the quotes on this page............

 * The context from which they derive are CLEARLY given below the quote!!

There is some context inferred, but it is plainly insufficient to make these comments stand as something clearly about Hess. These quotations by Bird might perhaps be extended to provide more indications of context, but it would probably be better to add some simple and clear quotations from Bird's book as to what the commotions were all about, rather than how Bird or others reacted to them. ~ Kalki 09:29, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Unsourced
Wikiquote no longer allows unsourced quotations, and they are in process of being removed from our pages (see Wikiquote:Limits on quotations); but if you can provide a reliable, precise and verifiable source for any quote on this list please move it to Rudolf Hess. --Antiquary 19:28, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
 * I hear the music of youth on the warden's radio. Somehow I cannot reconcile this with good music. However it is one form of protest. The youth of today are protesting for many reasons and they want to be heard. One way of being heard is through their music. I do enjoy The Beatles however; their music has a definite beat and in many ways their music is good music.

 * Why don't they release me? Why must I suffer so? I alone tried to bring about peace in the world and for this I must stay here the longest. It is not right. It is not just! All I want is to go home and die in peace and be buried in the garden.
 * Hess in Spandau Prison

 * We believe that the Fuhrer is fulfilling a divine mission to German destiny! This belief is beyond challenge.

 * The Party is Hitler! Hitler is Germany, just as Germany is Hitler! Sieg Heil! Sieg Heil! Sieg Heil!
 * [a speech given next to Hitler]

title: Talk:Rudolf Hess


text:
User talk:80.35.223.179

Please stop creating articles that are not in English. This is the English Wikiquote wiki and headings should be in English, and quotes in other languages provided with translation. The activity you are engaging in resembles that of known vandals, and further creation of non-English articles could result in a block. For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote, and also What Wikiquote is not for a list of common activities that Wikiquote does not support. When people are not interested in responsibly contributing to the development of the project incidents of their deliberate vandalism can result in IP addresses being blocked from editing. ~ Kalki 10:03, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:80.35.223.179


text:
Derek Jarman

Michael Derek Elworthy Jarman (January 31, 1942 – February 19, 1994) was a British film director, stage designer, artist, and writer. He is most known for his controversial films including Sebastiane (1975), the first film in Latin, Jubilee (1977) in which Queen Elizabeth I was transported to the punk contemporary England, and Blue (1993) which depicted his own suffering with AIDS. Jarman was gay and an outspoken supporter of gay rights; he also cultivated a beautiful garden at his home in Dungeness, Kent.

Quotes

 * People say to me, "You make fantastic films" and I say, "No, I make documentaries."
 * In Bergen Filmklub.

 * On December 22, 1986, finding I was body positive, I set myself a target: I would disclose my secret and survive Margaret Thatcher. I did. Now I have set my sights on the millennium and a world where we are all equal.
 * At Your Own Risk (1991).

 * Dear William Shakespeare. I am a 14 year old and I’m queer like you. I’m learning art. I wanted to be a queer artist like Leonardo or Michaelangelo. But I like Francis Bacon best I read Alan Ginsberg, Rimbaud. I like Tchaikovsky, if I make films I will make them like Eisenstein, Murnau, Pasolini, Visconti. Love from Derek.
 * Letter to the Minister (1992).

title: Derek Jarman


text:
Ahmad Jannati

Ayatollah Ahmad Jannati Massah (born 22 February 1927) is the chair of the Guardian Council of the Islamic Republic of Iran.

Quotes

 * Al-Qaeda means Bush and Blair. Who established Al-Qaeda? You are the ones who should be put on trial. You were the mother of Al-Qaeda.
 * Terror in London (9) - Ayatollah Ahmad Jannati in Tehran Friday Sermon: The English Government May Have Caused the London Bombings Like the US Government May Have Caused 9/11 July 2005.

 * May Allah, by the virtue of the Hidden Imam, God will remove the evil of America and Israel from humanity....I say to those dear people: Oh Iraqi brothers and sisters, America and Israel don't want your heads to remain attached to your bodies.
 * Friday Sermon In Tehran University By Ayatollah Jannati: America Will Collapse. We Must Be Patient. June 2004.

 * (The Americans) advanced to within 500 meters from the Holy Mosque (in Najaf). On this occasion, I must thank and praise those in that complex who resist these bloodthirsty wolves.
 * Friday Sermon at Tehran University: The Americans in Najaf Are Bloodthirsty Wolves August 2004.

 * You have made homosexuality official and legal. I spit in your face.
 * Secretary of Iranian Guardian Council Ayatollah Ahmad Jannati: I Spit in the Face of the West, which Has Made Homosexuality Official and Legal,2006

 * They must not have security. If Muslims have no security, neither must they. When there is no security for a Muslim's life, land, honor, and property, why should they have security? They are the people of “Dar Al-Harb,” so why should they have security?...Another thing, set aside the disagreements. They do not like the Kurds, nor the Arabs, the Sunnis, nor the Shiites. They have come to fight the people of Iraq. Basically, they have come to fight Islam. There is no need for wars between the Kurds and Arabs and the Sunni and Shiites. All of you gather under one flag.
 * Ayatollah Ahmad Jannati in his Tehran University Friday Sermon: Muslims Should Endanger English and American Interests June 2004.

title: Ahmad Jannati


text:
Mahmoud Hashemi Shahroudi

Ayatollah Mahmoud Hashemi Shahroudi (15 August 1948 – 24 December 2018) was an Iranian religious and political leader, who served as Chief Justice of Iran from 1999 to 2009.

Quotes

 * Occupiers have a role in spreading insecurity and terror in Iraq to justify their illegitimate presence there.
 * Regarding the U.S. presence in Iraq Iran calls for U.S. withdrawal from Iraq ahead of security conference (March 10, 2007)

title: Mahmoud Hashemi Shahroudi


text:
User talk:Dudemanwoman69

~ Kalki 12:21, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:Dudemanwoman69


text:
User talk:216.144.184.67

The material removed from the Eleanor Roosevelt page has often been attributed to her, but no clear sourcing has been provided for her or for other candidates for authorship of the phrase. ~ Kalki 12:24, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:216.144.184.67


text:
User talk:168.169.140.84

~ Kalki 12:25, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:168.169.140.84


text:
Talk:Francis of Assisi

Preach, if necessary use words
Rev. Byron Spradlin here: Would anyone know the source and accurate statement of an alleged quote by St. Francis of Assisi something like what follows?

RE: the use of art in expressing our faith; "... at all times declare the glories of the Gospel, and when necessary use words."

If anyone knows the real statement, with its source, I'd be very happy to hear from you.

Thank you--Rev. Byron Spradlin, Nashville, TN USA

great words "Preach the Gospel always, and if necessary, use words."

"Preach the Gospel always, and if necessary, use words." is likely misattributed. See http://www.americancatholic.org/e-News/FriarJack/fj092302.asp#F2 The closest quote found is “Let all the brothers, however, preach by their deeds.”  (jkibbe)

Start by doing what's necessary
Moved from article pending identification, per current practice. Gordonofcartoon 12:14, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
 * Earliest result I find in Google Books is Reader's Digest, January 1987 (link).

 * If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow man.

 * Preach the Gospel always, and if necessary, use words.

Caption is unrelated to image
I propose removing the image and its unrelated caption from the Disputed section. An image also appears on this talk page without explanation. patsw (talk) 02:10, 19 October 2015 (UTC)
 * I concur with you. Images are stronger to give an impression than words in many cases. If the pic has an description, I prefer the authentic quote or a mere description of image subject (the name of statue etc.).--Aphaia ([[Use

Links not working
The external links to Rule of 1221, Rule 11 and Orthodox Order of Friars Minor are not working.

The links appear to be correct, when when clicking on them, a / is appended to the end, resulting in a 404 error.

clicking the link takes you to the not working URL http://www.sacred-texts.com/chr/wosf/wosf06.htm/

manually removing the appended / makes it work http://www.sacred-texts.com/chr/wosf/wosf06.htm

same for the other

"The one you are looking for is the one who is looking."
This quote is attributed to St. Francis of Assisi all over the internet, but I can't find an authentic source for it. Some say it is from a "wise man," leave it anonymous, say it is from "the mystics," or even attribute it to Rumi. Does anyone know where it comes from, if it was Francis, or if it is misattributed?

Here's a couple other variations of the quote: "What you are looking for is where you are looking from." "What we are looking for is what is looking."

An Unsorted Quotation
Here's the following quotation:

"Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible."

Thanks for checking. --Apisite (talk) 11:22, 13 April 2021 (UTC)

title: Talk:Francis of Assisi


text:
User talk:Mattcrid~enwikiquote

~ UDScott 14:47, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

hi sup.

 * Insert speaker's name:mattcrid

[[Media:Example.ogg]]

~ UDScott 14:09, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Mattcrid. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Mattcrid~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:29, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:52, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Mattcrid~enwikiquote


text:
User:Mattcrid~enwikiquote

a member of wikiquote.

controbutes almost every day

title: User:Mattcrid~enwikiquote


text:
Lancelot Andrewes

Lancelot Andrewes (1555 – 25 September 1626) was an English clergyman and scholar, who held high positions in the Church of England during the reigns of Queen Elizabeth I and King James I.

Quotes

 * A cold coming they had of it, at this time of the year; just the worst time of the year to take a journey, and specially a long journey, in.
 * Speaking of the Three Magi in Sermon 15, Of the Nativity (1622)
 * But because in the Sacrament all those doe meete together, therefore nothing so availeable to take away sinne, as the touching of bread and wine, with our lips.
 * Apospasmatia Sacra, Or A Collection of Posthumous and Orphan Lectures: delivered at St. Pauls and St. Giles his Church (1657), p. 520

Quotes about Lancelot Andrewes

 * I had dinner to-day with the Bishop of Ely [Andrewes] and heard him read chapter VIII of his book [Responsio ad ‘Apologiam’ Card. Bellarmine]. It is wonderful with what elegance this most learned man confutes the theological scum, the folly, and sometimes the impious blasphemies of Bellarmine.
 * Isaac Casaubon, diary entry (24 November 1610), quoted in James Brodrick, The Life and Work of Blessed Robert Francis Cardinal Bellarmine, S.J. 1542–1621, Volume II (1928), p. 227

 * I have read and daily read this work [Responsio ad ‘Apologiam’ Card. Bellarmine] in which sincere piety contends for the first place with varied learning and a certain most sweet elegance... Truly wretched Cardinal, who has thus found in his effete old age an antagonist full of genius, rare erudition, and eloquence... If there is any sense of shame left in him I do not think he will ever again dare to descend into the arena with this adversary—certe enim impar congressus Achilli.
 * Isaac Casaubon to James Montague, the Bishop of Bath and Wells (November 1610), quoted in James Brodrick, The Life and Work of Blessed Robert Francis Cardinal Bellarmine, S.J. 1542–1621, Volume II (1928), p. 227

 * The bishop of Chichester is appointed to aunswer Bellarmin about the oth of allegeaunce, which taske I doubt how he will undertake and performe, beeing so contrarie to his disposition and course to meddle with controversies.
 * John Chamberlain, letter (21 October 1608), quoted in The Letters of John Chamberlain, Vol. I, ed. N. E. McClure (1939), p. 264

 * It is only when we have saturated ourselves in his prose, followed the movement of his thought, that we find his examination of words terminating in the ecstasy of assent. Andrewes takes a word and derives the world from it; squeezing and squeezing the word until it yields a full juice of meaning which we should never have supposed any word to possess. In this process the qualities which we have mentioned, of ordonnance and precision, are exercised.
 * T. S. Eliot, Essays Ancient & Modern (1936), p. 21

 * Master Lillies immoderate commending him, by little and little I was drawne on to bee an auditor of his: since when, whensoever I heard him, I thought it was but hard and scant allowance that was giv'n him, in comparison of the incomparable gifts that were in him.
 * Thomas Nashe, Have with You to Saffron-Walden (1596), quoted in The Complete Works of Thomas Nashe, Vol. III (1883–84), p. 159

title: Lancelot Andrewes


text:
Carl Bernstein

Carl Bernstein (born February 14, 1944) is an American journalist who, as a reporter for The Washington Post along with Bob Woodward, broke the story of the Watergate break-in and consequently helped bring about the resignation of US president Richard Nixon. For his role in breaking the scandal, Bernstein received many awards; his work helped earn the Post a Pulitzer Prize for Public Service in 1973.

Quotes

 * The reality is that the media are probably the most powerful of all our institutions today and they, or rather we [journalists], too often are squandering our power and ignoring our obligations. The consequence of our abdication of responsibility is the ugly spectacle of idiot culture!
 * The best obtainable version of the truth, Carl Bernstein's talk at the annual convention of the Radio and Television News Directors Association, 1998-09-26.

 * You can't serve the public good without the truth as a bottom line.

An A-Z of cultural terms, The Guardian (1992)

 * The failures of the press have contributed immensely to the emergence of a talk-show nation, in which public discourse is reduced to ranting and raving and posturing. We now have a mainstream press whose news agenda is increasingly influenced by this netherworld.

 * The greatest felony in the news business today is to be behind, or to miss a big story. So speed and quantity substitute for thoroughness and quality, for accuracy and context. The pressure to compete, the fear somebody else will make the splash first, creates a frenzied environment in which a blizzard of information is presented and serious questions may not be raised.

 * The lowest form of popular culture—lack of information, misinformation, disinformation, and a contempt for the truth or the reality of most people’s lives—has overrun real journalism. Today, ordinary Americans are being stuffed with garbage.

 * We are in the process of creating what deserves to be called the idiot culture. Not an idiot sub-culture, which every society has bubbling beneath the surface and which can provide harmless fun; but the culture itself. For the first time, the weird and the stupid and the coarse are becoming our cultural norm, even our cultural ideal.

title: Carl Bernstein


text:
F. Anstey

F. Anstey was the pen-name of Thomas Anstey Guthrie (8 August 1856 – 10 March 1934), an English novelist and journalist.

Quotes

 * Drastic measures is Latin for a whopping.
 * Vice Versa, Ch.7

Tourmalin's Time Cheques (1885)

 * All quotes are from the public domain text of the novel, available at "Tourmalin's Time Cheques"

 * Two or three days at sea are equivalent to at least as many weeks on shore.
 * Prologue

 * He was not a strong-minded man; but he had one quality which is almost as valuable a safeguard against temptation as strength of mind—namely, timidity.
 * Prologue

 * The knowledge that one has a remedy within reach is often as effectual as the remedy itself, if not more so.
 * Chapter 2, “The Second Cheque”

 * He had had a warning, a practical moral lesson which had merely arrived, as such things often do, rather after date.
 * Chapter 3, “The Third Cheque”

 * “And you suppose that, knowing how I have changed, he will believe that!” she cried. “He will fire long before you can finish one of those fine sentences!”
 * Chapter 8, “Paid in His Own Coin”

The Brass Bottle (1900)

 * All quotes are from the public domain text of the novel, available at "The Brass Bottle"

 * Models of manly beauty are rare out of novels, and seldom interesting in them.
 * Chapter 1, “Horace Ventimore Receives a Commission”

 * Candour’s the cement of friendship.
 * Chapter 1, “Horace Ventimore Receives a Commission”

 * No doubt they would tolerate him now for the Professor’s sake; but who would not rather be ignored than tolerated?
 * Chapter 3, “An Unexpected Opening”

 * I can’t call myself a busy man—unfortunately,” said Horace, with that frankness which scorns to conceal what other people know perfectly well already.
 * Chapter 3, “An Unexpected Opening”

 * “No doubt the fault was mine,” said the Professor, in a tone that implied the opposite.
 * Chapter 3, “An Unexpected Opening”

 * “Wisely was it written: ‘Let him that desireth oblivion confer benefits—but the memory of an injury endureth for ever.’”
 * Chapter 4, “At Large”

 * “How excellent is the saying of one of old: ‘He that adventureth upon matrimony is like unto one who thrusteth his hand into a sack containing many thousands of serpents and one eel. Yet, if Fate so decree, he may draw forth the eel.’”
 * Chapter 6, “Embarras de Richesses”

 * He called to mind all the millionaires he had ever read or heard of; they didn’t seem to get much fun out of their riches. The majority of them were martyrs to dyspepsia. They were often weighed down by the cares and responsibilities of their position; the only people who were unable to obtain an audience of them at any time were their friends; they lived in a glare of publicity, and every post brought them hundreds of begging letters, and a few threats; their children were in constant danger from kidnappers, and they themselves, after knowing no rest in life, could not be certain that even their tombs would be undisturbed. Whether they were extravagant or thrifty, they were equally maligned, and, whatever the fortune they left behind them, they could be absolutely certain that, in a couple of generations, it would be entirely dissipated.
 * Chapter 7, “Gratitude—a Lively Sense of Favours to Come”

 * These statements were, as he felt even in making them, not only gratuitous, but utterly unconvincing, but he had arrived at that condition in which a man discovers with terror the unsuspected amount of mendacity latent in his system.
 * Chapter 8, “Bachelor’s Quarters”

 * “Thou hast heard of her incomparable charms, and verily the ear may love before the eye.” ”It may,” admitted Horace, “but neither of my ears is the least in love at present.”
 * Chapter 14, “Since There’s No Help, Come, Let Us Kiss and Part!”

 * “Veracity, as thou wilt learn,” answered the Jinnee, “is not invariably the Ship of Safety.”
 * Chapter 17, “High Words”

title: F. Anstey


text:
1921

1921 1921 1921 1921

title: 1921


text:
User talk:Verantwortlich

Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy!-- Poetlister 15:52, 28 March 2007 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * Also see What Wikiquote is not for common activities that Wikiquote does not support.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
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 * When posting to a discussion, please sign with a date by writing four tildes (~~) and saving.
 * Be bold.

Changes to categories
I absolutely think your changes are correct (e.g. moving from Dutchmen to Dutch people) - we should definitely make this change throughout the project. I've done this already a couple of times in the past. Thanks for your efforts! ~ UDScott 17:08, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

 * One comment on your latest category additions: I don't think that most people associate Jamaicans with Central America. I would recommend that you add a category for Caribbean people, with subcategories for the island nations within the Caribbean region. I would reserve Category:Central Americans for people from the mainland nations (Belize, Costa Rica, El Salvador, Guatamala, Honduras, Nicaragua, and Panama). ~ UDScott 14:54, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

 * I think you're right about Category:Central Americans (Cubans and Jamaicans could be placed in Category:Carribeans maybe?) Verantwortlich 14:58, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

 * Yes, that's what I think (although it should be Category:Caribbeans - spelled correctly, right?) :-) ~ UDScott 15:01, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

Frasier
Hello. Thank you very much for you contributions to the Frasier page (a good selection of quotes). I would only ask that you look closely at the way TV quotes are normally formatted. Your contributions (in particular your use of bullets [*] instead on colons [:] at the beginning of lines) are not consistent with generally established conventions for formatting. Regards, -- Pharaoh Hound  (talk)  12:17, 3 September 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:Verantwortlich


text: Category:Scots

title: Category:Scots


text: Category:Northern Irish people

title: Category:Northern Irish people


text:
Walter Russell

Walter Bowman Russell (May 19, 1871 – May 19, 1963) was an impressionistic American painter (of the Boston School), sculptor, natural philosopher, musician, author, and builder.

The Man who Tapped the Secrets of the Universe

 * Biography by Glenn Clark (1946)

 * "I have found out that the real essentials of greatness in men are not written in books, nor can they be found in the schools, They are written into the inner consciousness of everyone who intensely searches for perfection in creative achievement and are understandable to such men only."

 * "Successful men of all the ages have learned to multiply themselves by gathering thought energy into a high potential and using it in the direction of the purpose intended. Every successful man or great genius has three particular qualities in common. The most conspicuous of these is that their minds grow more brilliant as they grow older, instead of less brilliant. Great men’s lives begin at forty, where the mediocre man’s life ends. The genius remains an ever-flowing fountain of creative achievement until the very last breath he draws. The geniuses have learned how to gather thought energy together to use for transforming their conceptions into material forms. The thinking of creative and successful men is never exerted in any direction other that that intended. That is why great men produce a prodigious amount of work, seemingly without effort and without fatigue. The amount of work such men leave to posterity is amazing. When one considers such men of our times as Edison, Henry Ford or Theodore Roosevelt, one will find the three characteristics I have mentioned common to every one of them."

 * "Joy and happiness are the indicators of balance in a human machine, just as a change in the familiar hum in a mechanism immediately indicates an abnormalcy to the practiced ear of the mechanic. An inner joyousness, amounting to ecstasy, is the normal condition of the genius mind. Any lack of that joyousness develops body-destroying toxins. That inner ecstasy of the mind is the secret fountain of perpetual youth and strength in any man. He who finds it finds omnipotence and omniscience.

 * "Tiredness and fatigue are effects caused by ignorance of Nature and disobedience to her inexorable law. You may command Nature to the extent only in which you are willing to obey her. You cannot intelligently obey that which you do not comprehend. Ask of Nature that you may be one with her and she will whisper her secrets to you to the extent in which you are prepared to listen. Seek to be alone much to commune with Nature and be thus inspired by her mighty whisperings within your consciousness. Nature is a most jealous god, for she will not whisper her inspiring revelations to you unless you are absolutely alone with her."

 * The future of great business lies in man’s comprehension of the principle of Balance in Natural Law and his determination to work WITH it instead of against it.

 * "The underlying principle of Balance in Nature’s One Law is equality of interchange between the pairs of opposites in any transaction in Nature. That principle must eventually be observed by big business, and the go-getter salesman who selfishly thinks that the sale he makes is the only thing that counts is not giving equally for what he takes.

 * "Equal interchange of goods and service between buyer and seller is the keynote of tomorrow’s business world when the vision of the modern business man awakens him to the wisdom of writing that policy into his code of ethics."

 * "I will see beauty and goodness in all things. From all that is unlovely shall my vision be immune."

 * [Beauty is] "Perfection of rhythm, balanced perfection of rhythm. Everything in Nature is expressed by rhythmic waves of light. Every thought and action is a light-wave of thought and action. If one interprets the God within one, one’s thoughts and actions must be balanced rhythmic waves. Ugliness, fears, failures and diseases arise from unbalanced thoughts and actions. Therefore think beauty always if one desire vitality of body and happiness."

A New Concept of the Universe (1953)

 * Action is man's free will right, but the reaction is nature's.
 * p. 132

 * The sole purpose of man on earth is to manifest his Creator. He has no other purpose.
 * p. 139

 * All men will come to me in due time, but theirs is the agony of awaiting.
 * p. 141

title: Walter Russell


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User:CloudNine

Hi, and welcome to my user page here on Wikiquote. My page on Wikipedia details a lot more about myself.

title: User:CloudNine


text: Category:People from the Netherlands

title: Category:People from the Netherlands


text: Category:People from France

title: Category:People from France


text:
User talk:72.10.138.254

~ Kalki 17:22, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:72.10.138.254


text:
Talk:Harriet Tubman

I reverted an edit which modernized the originally rendered indications of the dialect in which Tubman was portrayed as speaking. This is how she was quoted in the books cited, and they probably do indicate speech patterns of the time. Some of the quotes from older sources have also been rendered with modernized variants, but the originals should probably not be erased. ~ Kalki 17:30, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Edit
I edited "I looked at my hands to see if I was the same person. There was such a glory over everything. The sun came up like gold through the trees, and I felt like I was in heaven" to say "I looked at my hands to see if I was the same person. There was such a glory over everything. The sun came up like gold through the trees, and over the fields, and I felt like I was in heaven." The part in bold had been left out; I presume on accident. bri\

Edit History
The above post was from: User 70.237.204.4 ~ 70.237.204.4

Three "Tubman" Quotes
I (Barry Popik) write for my own etymology website and not necessarily Wikipedia. Here are three popular quotes that I looked at. Two definitely are not Tubman, but one possibly is a correct paraphrase. You can add this information if you wish. Fake Tubman quotes should not be allowed to go viral. "I freed a thousand slaves. I could have freed a thousand more if only they knew they were slaves." http://barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/i_freed_a_thousand_slaves/ From 1993-1994. Not Tubman. "Children, if you are tired, keep going; if you are hungry, keep going; if you want to taste freedom, keep going." http://barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/children_if_you_are_tired_keep_going/ From at least 1948, and used by her church in Auburn, New York. No contemporary cite, but I tend to believe that she said something like "keep going." Hillary Clinton added different words in a 2008 speech before the Democratic National Convention. "Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world." http://barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/every_great_dream_begins_with_a_dreamer/ It's from 2005. Reach for the stars? Change the world? Who would think this is from Harriet Tubman? Bapopik (talk) 01:50, 23 April 2016 (UTC)

title: Talk:Harriet Tubman


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User talk:69.228.210.216

The attribution you added of Larry P Barsetti for the statement often attributed to Benjamin Franklin would have to include cited sources prior to those of James Bovard in 1994 to be retained. ~ Kalki 18:56, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:69.228.210.216


text:
She's All That

She's All That is a 1999 film about a high school jock that makes a bet that he can turn an unpopular girl into the school's prom queen. A new comedy that proves there's more to attraction than meets the eye.

Laney

 * What is this, some sort of dork outreach program?
 * Stalking is illegal in all 50 states.
 * I feel just like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. You know, except for the whole hooker thing.
 * Who the HELL would nominate me?
 * Am I a bet? Am I a FUCKING BET?

Zack

 * This is all fascinating, Taylor, but could you skip to the part where you decided to screw me over.
 * Sometimes when you open up to people, you let the bad in with the good.
 * All you have left is a C-minus GPA with a Wonderbra.
 * Give her the right look, the right boyfriend, and bam. In six weeks she's being named prom queen.
 * So, Laney, I was wondering if you wanted to... [Laney walks away]... embarrass me horribly in front of all these people.

Brock

 * It's not about disrespect, it's just gas.
 * You didn't really think I'd leave for All-Star Road Rules and still be dating you? Oh, you did? That's so sweet.

Other

 * Mackenzie: So who's the lucky rebound skank?
 * Taylor: You didn't think you became popular for real, did you? Oh, you did? That's so sweet.
 * Dean: One second, you're Zack Siler, class president, stand-out athlete, all-around bad-ass mamba-jahamba; the next thing you know, you're Zack Siler, bitch-boy.
 * Girl: My soul is an island, my car is a Ford.

Dialogue

 * Zack: She kinda blew me off.
 * Mackenzie: I like her already.

 * Dean: I mean, the girl's an institution in this place. Every girl wants to be her, and every guy wants to nail her.
 * Preston: Basically she's you, with tits.

 * Dean: Is that a no?
 * Laney: That's a hell no.

 * Zack: What was that?
 * Laney: I was busy.
 * Zack: Yeah, busy wiggin'.
 * Laney: I did not wig.
 * Zack: Oh, there was major wiggage.

 * Taylor: [spilling drink on Laney] Oh, Oopsie. You know, you really should be more careful with silk.
 * Laney: Thank you.
 * Taylor: Excuse me?
 * Laney: Thank you. For a minute there, I forgot why I avoided places like this and people like you.
 * Taylor: Avoided us? Honey, look around you. To everyone here who matters, you're vapor, you're spam, a waste of perfectly good yearbook space, and nothing's ever gonna change that.
 * [Laney's eyes tear up]
 * Taylor: Oh, you aren't going to cry are you?

 * Laney: Simon! Simon, I have got your breakfast! Are you up?
 * Simon: Give me a couple of minutes.
 * Laney: Simon Boggs, there are children in Mexico who have already been up for three hours making clothes for corporate America.

 * Mackenzie: When was the last time you tweezed?
 * Laney: What?
 * Mackenzie: I mean your eyebrows.
 * Laney: Never, why?
 * Mackenzie: Ever watch Sesame Street?
 * Laney: Yeah.
 * Mackenzie: You know Bert?

 * Laney: Screw the dolphins.
 * Jesse: A guy tried that last year, banned from SeaWorld for life.

 * Taylor: Careful of what? OK, I could win this thing in florescent lighting, on the first day of my period, cloaked in tacky rags. Okay? My mother was prom queen in '71, my cousin - prom queen in '82, and my sister would have been prom queen in '94 if it wasn't for that scandal on the Color Me Badd tour bus, okay? I am a goddamn legacy, all right? And besides, not to be a bitch, but who's gonna beat Taylor Vaughan?
 * Katie: God, I hope that's not your acceptance speech.

 * Jesse: I'm Jesse Jackson. I'm not a good dancer.
 * Mackenzie: I'm Mac. I go to school with 500 chicks.

 * Taylor: Jump up my ass Zack.
 * Zack: Been there, done that.

 * Zack: So, can I have the last dance?
 * Laney: No, you can have the first.

 * Zack: Has anyone see Taylor?
 * Chandler: What?
 * Zack: You know, Taylor, my girlfriend.
 * Dean: Kinda tall, yells at everyone?

 * Laney: Sir, have you reached a decision?
 * Man: Yes I have. Supersize my balls.

 * Zack: Brock Hudson? What kind of a name is that?
 * Taylor: What kind of a name is "Zack?" OK, Brock is from The Real World.
 * Zack: What, Reseda?
 * Taylor : No, like the TV show. "Real World LA", second season, hello!
 * Zack: The dyslexic volleyball guy? They kicked him out of the house.

 * Dean: His dad owns Harrison Ford.
 * Laney: The actor?
 * Dean: No, the car dealership.

 * Mackenzie: Nothing personal, Laney, but this particular... coif, doesn't really go with your face shape.
 * Laney: What do you have in mind?
 * Mackenzie: Well, I have an idea.
 * Laney: What kind of idea?
 * Mackenzie: ...You'd really have to trust me.

<hr width="50%">
 * Melissa: He spoke to me!
 * Girl #2: He called you Connie!
 * Melissa: So?
 * Girl #2: Your name is Melissa!

Cast

 * Freddie Prinze Jr. — Zack Siler
 * Rachael Leigh Cook — Laney Boggs
 * Matthew Lillard — Brock Hudson
 * Paul Walker — Dean Sampson
 * Jodi Lyn O'Keefe — Taylor Vaughan
 * Kevin Pollak — Wayne Boggs
 * Anna Paquin — Mackenzie Siler
 * Kieran Culkin — Simon Boggs
 * Elden Henson — Jesse Jackson
 * Usher Raymond — Campus DJ
 * Kimberly 'Lil' Kim' Jones — Alex
 * Gabrielle Union — Katie
 * Dulé Hill — Preston
 * Tamara Mello — Chandler

title: She's All That


text:
User:Millancad~enwikiquote

I'll only be using this account to transwiki from Wikipedia. But I love Wikiquote all the same! That's about it, yeah.

title: User:Millancad~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Millancad~enwikiquote

Tada! It's a talk page. Sign all comments please. And don't be mean!

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Millancad. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Millancad~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:30, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:53, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Millancad~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:207.193.126.124

Please stop. If you continue to vandalize pages, you will be blocked from editing Wikiquote.  Cbrown1023  talk  19:44, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:207.193.126.124


text:
User talk:82.145.205.194

~ UDScott 19:50, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:82.145.205.194


text:
User talk:72.9.210.242

~ UDScott 19:55, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:72.9.210.242


text:
User talk:83.227.38.136

~ UDScott 19:59, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:83.227.38.136


text:
Category:People from the Czech Republic

For people from the Czech Republic or earlier equivalents.

title: Category:People from the Czech Republic


text:
User talk:75.179.170.195

~ UDScott 20:01, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

title: User talk:75.179.170.195