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Doug Stanhope

Doug Stanhope (born 25 March 1967) is an American stand-up comedian.

Word of Mouth (2002)

 * If you really believe that death leads to eternal bliss, then why are you wearing a seatbelt?

 * "Drugs support terrorism"? No, your SUV supports terrorism.

 * I had a girl say this to me. She goes "you know, if god intended women to suck dick, he'd have made cum taste like chocolate" I said "Yeah, but he had to make it taste like bleach so you remember to do the laundry"

 * I've been playing the CNN Drinking Game, have you ever played that? Where you do a shot every time George Bush says the word "evil"? Oh, I'm a wreck! You gotta do a double shot every time he says "evildoers". Chug the bottle for "axis of evil". Are you a president or an exorcist?!

 * "A national day of prayer"? Does that scare the spine out of anyone? Especially when you consider that it's all those dog-shit religions that start these fucking wars to begin with. Ninety percent of every war that's ever been fought is because of some made-up, mind control, completely fictional religion. You never hear in the news, "200 killed today when Atheist rebels took heavy shelling from the Agnostic stronghold in the north". No, it's because you got a silly, placebo religion cuz you don't want to admit that you don't fucking know.

 * Don't learn from other people's mistakes. That's the worst advice you could ever get. Other people are fucking morons. Wrestling's the number one show on cable television. You're gonna learn from their mistakes? They're fuckin' tools! You might be the first guy who could to do it right and be a hero for all of us. Take a chance and learn to fly there, Orville Wright!

 * America may be the best country, but that's like being the prettiest Denny's waitress. Just because you're the best doesn't mean you're good.

Something to Take the Edge Off (2000)

 * Are there any vice cops in here? You dicks. How do you do that for a living? I don't understand. I first read these stories and I think "Don't you have real crime to fight somewhere?" But then you think about it vice cops don't fight real crime; that's not their job. Real cops fight real crime. A vice cop's only job is to fuck up the party.

 * I hate when your friends quit drinking on you, don't you? It's sad. I've lost more friends to AA than Liberace did to the virus. It's sad to see 'em go. You see a thirty day chip on your buddy's key ring, it's like seeing a toe tag on his cold, stiff corpse.

 * Life is like animal porn, it's not for everyone.

 * Suicide is another thing that's so frowned upon in this society, but honestly, life isn't for everybody. It really isn't. It's sad when kids kill themselves 'cause they didn't really give it a chance, but life is like a movie: if you've sat through more than half of it and it sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the very end for you and make it all worthwhile. No one should blame you for walking out early.

 * Babies are like poems. They're beautiful to their creator, but to other people they're silly and fucking irritating.

 * I couldn't be a responsible enough parent if my kid was born with a new suit and a full-time job.

Die Laughing (2002)

 * It's thirty days since the terrorist act. George Bush has told us to go back to our normal lives and to go back to what we used to do, so I've gone back to thinking that George Bush is a soft-headed tit and a danger to all of us.

 * Does anyone get upset that George Bush keeps quoting the bible in all his fucking speeches? Does that get on anyone's last nerve? Does it ever occur to him that it's all those stupid fucking religions that start all this shit in the first place. National day of prayer? Fuck you! You think you're doing something? You're not. You can sit at home and cry jinx and keep your fingers crossed too; it does as much good. You wanna pray? Pray all day. Pray on your own time. You wanna help? Grab a shovel and start digging there, pinwheel, 'cause it looks like your god takes Tuesdays off.

Deadbeat Hero (2004)

 * The problem with this country is that old folks vote. We got shit to do, old folks don't, the only thing they have to do is judge you and vote.

 * If you're gonna have a pro-drug argument, start the argument where it starts: I have the right to do what ever the hell I want to my own body, if it kills me slowly, happy for me, fuck you, "clack clack" (miming a pump-action shotgun) stop me!

 * All illegal narcotics are medicinal. Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it, with little or no side effects if used as directed. Life's temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile. You should be inventing new drugs is what you should be doing! Newer, crazier drugs... and more holes, that's what you ladies need!

 * There's only two types of people who are against drugs: the people who have never done drugs and the people who really sucked at doing drugs.

 * Complaining that a comic is drunk is like going to a titty bar and complaining because your lapdancer is a communist.

 * With all the horrible, horrible shit that your priest is pumping into your kid's head, his dick should be the least of your worries, honestly. That's just a little mouthwash and a few years of therapy'll get rid of that. That Jesus shit will torture you for a lifetime.

 * If marriage didn't exist, would you invent it? Would you go "Baby, this shit we got together, it's so good we gotta get the government in on this shit. We can't just share this commitment 'tweenst us. We need judges and lawyers involved in this shit, baby. It's hot!"

 * You have options when it comes to abortion now. It's not like 1955 when you just had to kick her down a staircase and hope for the best... you feed her a tapeworm and hope it takes a left at the Y.

 * (on his ex-wife's abortion) Has anyone had an abortion? You're all rapt with attention now, all of a sudden, so I assume you all have. It's a fucking horrible thing to go through. And not horrible in that "Oh, it's a living thing, what are we doing?" Fuck the living thing. A genital wart is a living thing. If it's gonna irritate you for life, burn it off, right? Bladder cancer is alive and growing like a baby in you. If you try to remove that I'll protest you and say "stop playing god." … Before you actually go and get all quiet and pissy, like I'm some asshole about this, keep in mind I'm just telling you the parts that I think are funny. You don't know the reason we had... The reason we had an abortion was... It wasn't because... It wasn't frivolous. We didn't have an abortion because we weren't ready to take care of a child, we were irresponsible, or because we're not financially capable of taking... The reason we had it is 'cause I really wanted to see what it felt like to kill a baby.

 * (on people who join the military) As long as the people who kinda wanna go kill other people are going to go kill other people who kinda wanna go kill other people, you're killing all the right people and opening up all the best parking spaces.

 * You were born free, you got fucked out of half of it and you wave a flag celebrating it.

 * They say if you give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day, but if you teach a man to fish.... then he's gotta get a fishing license, but he doesn't have any money. So he's got to get a job and get into the Social Security system and pay taxes, and now you're gonna audit the poor cocksucker, 'cause he's not really good with math. So he'll pull the IRS van up to your house, and he'll take all your shit. He'll take your black velvet Elvis and your Batman toothbrush, and your penis pump, and that all goes up for auction with the burden of proof on you because you forgot to carry the one, 'cause you were just worried about eating a fucking fish, and you couldn't even cook the fish 'cause you needed a permit for an open flame. Then the Health Department is going to start asking you a lot of questions about where are you going to dump the scales and the guts. 'This is not a sanitary environment', and ladies and gentlemen if you get sick of it all at the end of the day... not even legal to kill yourself in this country. Thanks again, John Ashcroft, you weird bible addict, can't even handle your own drug. You were born free, you got fucked out of half of it, and you wave a flag celebrating it. [audience member]: Hey, don't hold back! [Doug]: You got an argument? [a.m.] No, keep goin'! … The only true freedom you find, is when you realize and come to terms with the fact that you are completely and unapologetically fucked, and then you are free to float around the system.

 * [in regards to the subway breakfast sandwich not being available after 11AM] I'll go "Uh, hey man, uh gimme an egg and cheese", and the kid will say, "I'm sorry, sir, it's after 11, we put all that stuff away." You didn't put it away...it's in the second green cabinet, it's right there. This place is as big as a photo-mat, there is no "away" in the building, you don't own "away". There's no Brink's truck that pulls up at 11:02 and yanks out the eggs under armed guard.

 * Mutations are exciting. They try to fix 'em when they come out. Did you see the two-headed baby they killed last month when they tried to cut it apart? That was hilarious!

No Refunds (2007)

 * New York is baffling in that it's a city that prides itself on being an absolute shit-hole. It's like — there's nothing good here, people are proud of that, they're happy, "Oh, it's overpriced, and it's overpopulated, and it stinks like piss, and comics! — comics film specials here!" And they all open with a joke about, "Yeah, you spend 8 thousand dollars a month for 9 square feet!" And you go, "Well, why do you fucking live here?" Why do people stay here?.. But unfortunately, this is where comedy works — where people are the most miserable. Like, I'd rather be filming a special on a beach in Costa Rica in a tiki bar right now, but they don't need comedians, they're already smiling, they're already happy — naturally! So that's why I'm doing a special here — cause it's the last fucking place I wanna be.

 * Pussy really is the main motivating factor in all of humankind. It really is. It's what gets shit built. [reacting to applause from the audience]: I'm not 'yeah' for pussy. This is a flaw in the system, don't clap for it! [I'm] saying, they know that is a catalyst, and that's why religion and government have to control supply and demand of pussy. And they do that by heaping shame upon you should you want to give away more than the 'federally allocated recommended daily allowance of pussy'. "Oh, she wants to suck more than one dick?! Whore! Shun your natural instinct, whore, or nothing'll get built." — It comes down to production, it really does. They have to keep that pussy like a dangling carrot, something that's hard to get so he keeps running on the treadmill, building more shit, sending out more boxes to the dollar store, pointless shit that no one needs. — That's why cocaine is illegal: it makes pussy too easy to get.

 * Jesus died for your sins. I'm doing it for your mere entertainment dollar.

 * Why would you die for someone's sins? Your sins are the only thing interesting about you, you dreary, bleak motherfuckers.

 * I'm kinda out of shit. Not in this set, I mean I have some stuff I put on paper. But in the long term, I think I'm outta shit. [I'm] fucking cannibalizing my own— seventeen years, how much more do you have to say? If I die soon, don't ever say I died too young. [...] Every time an artist dies young- Kurt Cobain, or whatever, there's always the people "It's so sad, he had so much more to give." — How do you know? Maybe he was out of shit. How do you know? He's done. He got all the money, he did all the drugs, he fucked all your holes. And that's the American Dream, and when you're done with that you go "Oh, that's why they call it a dream. — It's bullshit, I'm still empty." And he cashed out. How do you know what any artist had left? How do you know if Jimi Hendrix hadn't had died he wouldn't have wound up doing Superbowl half-time duets with Elton John right now?

 * Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people that you never met. And all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever, and you brag about — and the Americans'll go "Fuck the French! Fuck the French, if we hadn't had saved their ass in two World Wars, they'd be speakin' German right now!" And you go, "Oh, was that us?" Was that me and you, Tommy, we saved the French? Jesus! I know I blacked out a little bit after that fourth shot of Jägermeister last night, but I don't remember... I know we went through the Wendy's drive-thru to get one of them "Freschetta" sandwiches that looked so alluring on the commercial, but then we ordered it and realized we had no money, and we had to ditch out before the second window, and those douchebags in line behind us with the bass music probably got our order and we laughed about that. But I don't remember savin' the French. At all! I went through the last ten calls on my cell phone and there's nothin' incoming or outgoing to the French, lookin' for muscle on a project! I checked my pants, there's no mud stains on the knees from where we were garroting Krauts in the trenches at Verdun. I think "we" didn't do anything but watch sports bloopers while we got hammered. I think "we" should shut the fuck up!

 * Well, you know these immigrants, they come to our country, they burden our tax system. What they do is they come here and get into our education system and our health care and I gotta pay the taxes. My taxes have to pay that. Well what the fuck are you doing to me every time you have a kid? Every time you have a kid because its American I should pull up a chaise lounge and wave a flag while 15 of those things come out of you? Oh, I can’t wait to pay for these! They’re American! I have a vasectomy and an abortion on my record, but I can’t wait to pay for your fucking fat-headed mid-western kids. Love it! I’ll take a second job.

 * At least black people knew when they were slaves; you remain clueless.

From Across The Street (2009)

 * You know the funny thing about child pornography: [...] the lack of credits at the end. No ego on that side of Hollywood, is there? “Who did the editing on this film, it's seamless! I want to use him on my independent documentary”— but no names. Not even a nom de plume. Some people are in it just for the art.

 * Old people are getting into fights now in town hall meetings about health care. You don't fucking deserve it! Everyone else has health care, 'but we need health care. Canada has health care, everyone else does...' You think Americans deserve health care? Have you looked at this fucking horrible fat fuck country, slovenly sedentary lazy fat fucks! You don't even try! Once you get free health care, 'Oh yeah, fucking Sunday afternoon, buy 4 stuffed crust Cheesy Bread Cheese pizzas, and you'll get a Meaty Meaty Pork Pie Pork Bacon pizza for free with 12 Cinna-loaves!' (imitates glutton sounds, stuffing his face) 'That's a pretty good deal!' (more gluttony sounds) 'You know what else we need is free health care, too! (more gluttony sounds) 'My diabetes is so bad, I can't even feel my feet!' (more gluttony sounds) 'I have open fissures in my leg muscles so deep you can put your whole finger there!' (more gluttony sounds) 'Who's gonna pay for my amputation!?' (more glutton sounds) 'If I was in Amsterdam, they'd pay for my amputations 'cause they have free health care...' You know what else they have? BICYCLES! And they use them! (briefly sings 'Entry of the Gladiators' / 'Barnum and Bailey's Favorite' theme). You get nothing free. You gotta try on your own a little bit! We live in a country where the face of fitness is Jared from Subway!! That's your goal! It used to be like Jack LaLanne or Charles Atlas or some shit, dragging a tugboat with his teeth across the Hudson river, now it's some guy, that's still kinda fat. He's not as-fat-as-he-could-be fat, or -he-used-to-be fat, but he's still kinda fat. That's what you should aspire to! You wouldn't fuck Jarod with the lights on — c'mon! That's your goal? That's awful! You can't give Americans free shit 'cause 'free' is used as such a buzzword for gluttony. Like it's been used in advertising so much, 'buy one get one free,' 'free with purchase,' 'free samples' at the grocery store...'Oh Black Forest Ham, I never tried Black Forest Ham (more gluttony sounds). Turn your hat backwards so they don't recognize you when you go back! 'Vermont cheese, what's that?' (more gluttony sounds) They do the same shit with free health care! 'They said it's free, let's get something fucking checked. I got an itch, or a scratch, or a bite or a lump. Let's get this checked out! Doctor, I got a spot! Check it out for free!' 'It's a fucking coffee stain!! It's not even on your skin, it's on your shirt!' 'Well let's get a biopsy of that! That could be precancerous, right?! It's free — get my money's worth...'

Oslo: Burning The Bridge To Nowhere (2011)

 * Put your fucking camera away, you stupid fucking tourist of life! There's a whole generation of shitheads just filming every fucking thing they do. "I'm gonna film my entire life and watch it later!"

 * I don't like when minorities tell me that I can't understand racism because I'm white. I go: "No, you can't understand racism 'cause you're not white; I hear the shit they say about you when you leave the room! They don't hold back on my account."

 * We live in a world where people will have a GPS and a crucifix on the same dashboard — and you want me to have hope for these fuckin' monkeys on swing-sets?

 * Tradition and heritage are all dead people's baggage, stop carrying it. Move forward.

Before Turning the Gun on Himself (2012)

 * There's no such thing as addiction, there's only things that you enjoy doing more than life.

 * I love homosexuality, I promote it, you fuck and you don't leave fuckin' garbage on the earth because of it.

 * If you're offended by any word, in any language, it's probably because your parents were unfit to raise a child.

 * If you listen to anyone bitch about the economy for long enough, just let them talk, cuz you'll eventually hear why it's exactly their fault. And not just Wall Street people, just dumb fucks at a lunch counter in Flint, Michigan. "I'm just a simple man, with a simple wife and four simple children, and I just want an honest day's work. Y'know, Obama's exporting all or jobs overseas, now I can't even find work." You sad motherfucker– Hang on a second! Did you just say you had four children?! Wait, wait, you have four children? In Flint, Michigan?....Do you know how much it costs to raise a kid? The average cost to raise a single child to the age of seventeen is now $227,000. Almost a quarter of a million dollars! You have four of the fuckin' things! In Flint, Michigan!.... Next time you hear some sad sack on 60 Minutes bitching about how he got fucked over by the economy, instead of children imagine he said quarter of a million dollar toys, fuckin' boats and... "Yeah when they started laying off people in the late '80s I made it through the first round of cuts. I said, 'Baby, I don't know what's gonna happen in the future, so let's get a quarter of a million dollar Lamborghini.' And then I got the pink slip, got a six-month severance package, so I said, 'Okay, baby, we're really on shaky ground now, we'd better get a beach house and a speed boat.' And now I can't even find work because of Obamanomics. My wife's pregnant with a quarter of a million dollar who-knows-what-it's-gonna-be. I'm a victim." No, you're a gambling addict! You made a million dollar wager, and ya lost! You made a million dollar wager, on spec, with no money in the bank to back it up, and now the mob is comin' to take your thumbs!

 * You wanna feel bad for someone in a down-turned economy, I'll give you someone...prostitutes. Because a prostitute doesn't have that same "worst case scenario" b-plan that we all enjoy. No matter how shitty things are going for you on the job, "Danny, if they lay off anymore people, I'm gonna be out on the streets sucking dick for a living. I got nothin' else. I'm serious." Hooker doesn't have that same safety net. Hooker's already out there, sucking dicks.

 * On Keynesian Economic Theory As Applied To Private Sector Independent Contracting: "Ask Milton Friedman's dead Jew corpse what he thinks about the current economic crisis, and he will tell you... You better strengthen up your shit-pussy, baby!"

Beer Hall Putsch (2013)

 * Proof of the afterlife is this: if there were no afterlife, how could my mother have bought me and my friends so many nice things from the SkyMall catalogue on her credit card four days after she passed from this Earth? Answer me that, Your Honor! Answer me that! In fact, I'd like to enter these credit card receipts into evidence against the advice of my attorney! [...] That last piece of that story has special meaning to me because in my entire career, that's the only chunk of material I've ever had that had a statute of limitations before I could comfortably tell it on stage. Three year statute for credit card fraud, after that: fuck you.

 * As an openly gay comedian, I feel a responsibility to talk about a lot of issues that-- What? Are you gonna test me? You don't know if I'm lying. I can be as gay as I want to be up here, fuck you. What, are you going to strap me to a chair and blow loads in my face to see if I'm fibbing when I say I love it?

 * I love homosexuality, I defend it. But I hate faginess, because it's aesthetically unpleasing, the whole [frolics] "La la la la!" you don't have to do that. I have nothing against Jewish people, I hate Jewiness, the clammy [whiny] "Nyah nyah nyah, I get all... I'm allergic", personally that's unpleasing. I hate anyone who leads with their sexuality, homo or hetero. If I know your sexuality in the first 30 seconds of meeting you, you're fucking annoying. Heteros are the same way, if you have naked lady mud flaps or you go "Oh, after your show you want to go to Hooters?" or you just watch the game for the cheerleaders, just go into a basement and jerk off you fucking teenager, 13-year-old, and then come back when we can have a regular conversation.

No Place Like Home (2016)

 * The thing with the word 'retarded' is that 'retarded' is not like other epithets, it was not a word of hatred; retarded was the medical definition, was actually a word actually born in sensitivity. Cause they used to call them, before retarded was the word, doctors would use 'imbecile' or 'moron.' This is something a smart fuck at Harvard has labelled 'The Euphemism Treadmill': moron and imbecile were the correct terms for a while, and what happened is we co-opted those words to call our friend when he does something incredibly stupid, to the point where it became an insult. So out of sensitivity, they changed the word to 'retarded'... and what happened was we co-opted that word to call our friend when he does something incredibly stupid. So you can keep changing the word, and if you make the new one stick that's what I'm going to call my friend. "Did you just put a metal plate in a microwave? What are you, developmentally disabled? You don't fucking put a metal plate in a microwave, who doesn't know that?" You can make it as difficult to pronounce and Latin-based and medical-rooted, and if you make it stick that's the new word I'm going to call my friend when he trips over his own shoelaces: "Ha ha! You just exhibited some of the atlantoaxial instability that is usually associated with the trisomie 21 genetic imbalance!"

 * Every fucking week there's some celebrity or comic or an athlete that has to apologize for a caught on tape comment, or insensitive joke, a drunk tweet. And they have a press conference, and it's always something that's way weaker than the shit I say every night-- as a segue I say worse shit, nobody ever asks me to apologize. I wouldn't, but I wanna be asked one time. I've got way better shit than they do, I demand outrage for God's sakes, what do I have to do? I could've told that joke at the Simon Wiesenthal Museum of Tolerance and people would go "Huh? What'd he say? I wasn't listening."

Miscellaneous

 * Wanting more. Having your cake or eating your cake are fine. Not even wanting cake is where you get fucked.
 * When asked, "What would constitute 'complete happiness' to Doug Stanhope (you)?" Doug Stanhope interview, MarkPrindle.com, 2007

 * Whether the reasoning for these laws is insurance costs, more opportunities for random taxation through traffic stops, curbing lost production or any other justification that could be offered, the bottom line is that it isn't governments place. You own your body. No legislation should infringe on that.
 * On legislation against drug use, driving without a seatbelt, and motorcycling without a helmet. Doug Stanhope interview, MarkPrindle.com, 2007

 * The word addiction is used far too liberally in our society and I shy away from it. If I have any addiction, it would be nicotine. I would say alcohol is more of a compulsive habit for me. I have used different narcotics for roughly 20 years and I have always used them socially, sporadically and usually sparingly. I use cocaine occasionally and sometimes medicinally - before a third show Saturday, a bump of coke can make the difference between a strong performance and just phoning it in - and I've never developed any type of habit, never craved it the next day. I will use hallucinogens a few times a year as well, always in a safe environment. So far as an "early grave," I'm more concerned with quality of life. No sense in having a mint condition classic car if you're afraid to take it out of the garage. I look as sadly at people awash in hand-sanitizer and surgical masks in elevators as they might see me when I'm pouring booze down my head on stage.
 * On his drug use. Doug Stanhope interview, MarkPrindle.com, 2007

 * 2013 Moore Oklahoma Tornado. "If you think that didn't take balls, you've never been to Oklahoma. Saying 'I'm an atheist' in Oklahoma is like screaming jihad at airport security. That took some nuts. If you watch the footage, all the other victims are on the news thanking Jesus for only killing their neighbors and not them, while a crawler is on the screen telling me where I can text money to help them out. Fuck them. I don’t want Jesus getting credit for my 50 dollars. I’ll help that other girl out, that CNN's exploiting. Hell yes! She ain’t got no Jeebus. She gonna need money. So I did. I started an indiegogo fundraiser account and atheists ended up ponying up over 126,000 dollars just for little old her...and I couldn't get the smile off of my face for a week. I didn't do it because I felt sympathy because she got all her shit destroyed by a tornado. I did it simply to be a prick to her okie Christian neighbors, hoping that they were still eatin off of FEMA trucks when someone drove up and presented Rebecca with a giant cardboard check. It's funny how hate can make you do real nice things every now and then."

title: Doug Stanhope


text:
Max Frisch

Max Rudolf Frisch (15 May 1911 – 4 April 1991) was a Swiss architect, playwright and novelist, who is regarded as one of the most influential Swiss writers of the 20th century.

I'm not Stiller (1955)

 * Nothing is harder than to accept oneself.

 * The renunciation of recognition will never become possible without a certitude that our life is directed by a suprahuman authority.

 * The horror of uncreative solitude.....

 * How much self-knowledge is limited to presenting other people with a more precise and exact description of our weaknesses.

 * You merely had an affair with me, to be exact, and therefore no right to prevent me from another affair.'

 * Cause and effect are never divided between two people

 * You can't make the incomprehensible comprehensible without losing it completely.

 * It is a sign of non love that is to say a sin, to form a finished image of ones neighbors.

 * My reality doesn't lie in the part I play, but in the unconscious decision as to what kind of part I assign to myself.

Homo Faber (1957)

 * Technology [is] the knack of so arranging the world that we don't have to experience it.

Gantenbein (1964)

 * Carrying on with the conversation like a woman when the bill comes...

 * They wanted what is possible only once: the now.

 * Not to know one another to a degree that went beyond all possibility of knowing one another was beautiful.

 * I know that I'm the happiest of lovers...
 * Gantenbein faking to his lover he is blind

 * It is the secret that a man and a woman keep from each other that makes them a couple

 * He knows that every piece of selfknowledge which one cannot keep to oneself makes one smaller and smaller, he knows that he who cannot keep silent his wishes to be recognized in the greatness of his selfknowledge which is no selfknowledge if it cannot be kept silent, and one becomes hypersensitive one feels betrayed because one wants to be recognized by people, one becomes ridiculous ambitious in inverse ratio to ones selfknowledge

Sketchbook 1946-1949

 * The monstruous paradox that people come closer to one another without words

 * We nest in an accident whose precarious balance, when we happen to become conscious of it, oppresses yet at the same time inspires us

 * To a certain degree we are really the person others have seen in us

 * Time does not change us it just unfolds us

 * Even silence becomes whether we want it or not a statement that is in fact astoundingly presumptuous

 * How can we ever judge a human being when he is and he will always be another person

 * Uniforms ruin every character

 * 'Everything that is human looks like a special case'

 * Overcoming prejudice: the only possible way through love, which creates no graven images.

 * The sort of misery that brings no moral reward, misery that is of no value to the mind and soul, that is the true misery, it is hopeless, bestial and nothing else.

 * To write is to read one's own self

 * You hold the pen like a needle in a seismic observatory, and in fact it is not we who write, but rather we are written. Writing means to read oneself

 * A poem, a genuine one, does not need to fear the world; it stands up to it, even when a bell rings and an unexpected guest arrives to tell us, while the same coffee is still in our cups, of his fourteen years in captivity...

 * What we call unfaithfuless: our attempt for once to get out from behind our own face, our desperate hope of eluding the definitive.

 * Does not everyone who describes something he has experienced believe basically that whatever happens to him has some sort of relevance.

 * Half a lifetime is spent with the unspoken question: Will it happen will it not?

 * Finished things cease to be a shelter for the spirit; but work in progress is a delight

 * Wer sich nicht mit Politik befaßt, hat die politische Parteinahme, die er sich sparen möchte, bereits vollzogen: er dient der herrschenden Partei.
 * A person who does not concern himself with politics has already made the political choice he was so anxious to spare himself: he is serving the ruling party.

 * (Present) it is a culture that strictly ignores present obligations and places itself entirely at the service of eternity

 * Why there are so many great actresses, so few great woman writers? The erotic urge that lies at the bottom of all art has a feminine and a masculine character.  Feminine is the urge to be; masculine the urge to do.  Interpretative art always has more of the feminine about it

 * People with the same education as my own, speaking the same words that I do, loving the same books, the same music, the same paintings, are by no means immune from the danger of turning into monsters and doing things we would not have thought possible among the people of our own day, apart from a few pathological exceptions. If they are not immune, Why should I be so confident of my own immunity?

 * One can be resolved to promote good, or one can be resolved to be a good person- Two separate things that are mutually exclusive

 * Your virtuous living is your enemy's best and cheapest weapon

 * What makes Shakespeare so overwhelming is the way in which the situation (who is confronting whom) is usually itself part of the composition, meaningful already as a situation

 * Theatrical effectiveness, I believe, lies in it's rarity its uniqueness

 * Plots- it seems there are thousands of them, all one's acquaintances known some, strangers make a present of them in letters, each the basis for a play or a novel...

 * That a plot has no real life of its own; it exists only in it's precipitates. It cannot be distilled but only crystallized- in which form it is then immutable, whether successful or unsuccessful: once and for all

 * Where the works gives scope for individuality, one sees a blossoming of self respect

Sketchbook 1966-1977

 * How much frankness can we stand in a friend?
 * The older you get the simpler you want to make it.
 * I feel fairly certain that my hatred harms me more than the people whom I hate.
 * What hope have you know given up ?
 * Are you friend with yourself ?
 * Do you know what you need?
 * ...for no rational reason.

Montauk (1975)

 * A society needs famous people; the question is whom it chooses for that role. Any criticism of its choice is by implication a criticism of that society.

 * Our guilt has its uses. It justifies much in the lives of others.

 * Life is boring. I have experiences now only when I am writing.

 * There are moments when her voice is all he needs.

 * If on some occasion I happen to read something in it — because, for instance, I need to know a date — I am always disconcerted to find that two or five years ago I came to exactly the same conclusion, only to forget it because I had not succeeded in living up to it; in fact, I had tenaciously been doing the very opposite.

 * You can lose a woman when you have won her.

 * The self knowledge that gradually or abruptly alienates a person from his previous life.

Drafts for a Third Sketchbook (2013)
the American for that is: CASUAL SEX.
 * THANATOS AND EROS

 * The dead are difficult because they´ve never known the people I´m involved with today

 * Basically America (the USA) is not a warmongering but simply a commercial society: war as the continuation of business by other means.

Articles

 * Man hat Arbeitskräfte gerufen, und es kamen Menschen.
 * Translation: We were calling for manpower and people came.

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: Max Frisch


text:
Talk:Bhagavad Gita

Why are there all those other links on this quote page? Shouldn't they be over at the main article about the Gita?

Einstein "quote" is almost certainly bogus
I removed this quote as almost certainly fabricated, as a google search indicates no published sources of it prior to 2005, and that book merely cites an internet web page as its source:

 * When I read the Bhagavad-Gita and reflect about how God created this universe everything else seems so superfluous.
 * Albert Einstein

I have traced the source to a Yahoo user in Pakistan. I have contacted them but have had no response.

Though Einstein respected many traditions the stated views are directly contrary to most of his known opinions regarding traditional faiths and his notions of God. ~ Dragon Warrior 18:59, 26 June 2008 (UTC)

 * "I removed this quote as almost certainly fabricated"
 * why does it seem fabricated? Einsteins "religious view" are taken from (Baruch Spinoza)which scholars suggest is taken from a concept found in the vedic Vedanta of Hinduism, we also see the black and white footage of the father of the atomic bomb quoting the hindu scriptures, we also know that albert had a close work contact with hindu physics scientists such as "BOSE" Bose–Einstein condensate (BEC.

 * Also Im not sure what planet your on when you suggest that this quote started in pakistan in 1995, that alone sounds like your talking out of your BEEP because pakistan would NEVER credit hindus which such a prestige name, in fact why dont you tell us step by step on how you "TRACKED DOWN" this quote?

 * I agree, Pakistan would almost always criticize anything Indian, especially Hindu scriptures, which promote peace and unselfishness.

I have read a great deal of Einstein's writing regarding philosophy and social issues, and I am certain that that quote is bogus. What gives it away is the phrase "how God created this universe" -- Einstein was not a "creationist", meaning he was not someone who believed that there was a creator of the universe. Atanudey (talk) 17:07, 11 September 2014 (UTC)

The earliest web source I have found for the quote, "When I read the Bhagavad-Gita and reflect about how God created this universe everything else seems so superfluous" (to include spelling variants "Bhagavadgita" and "Bhagavad Gita") is this: http://sitaram.0catch.com/page336.htm. It was published 29 OCT 2000. The earliest published source retrieved by Google Scholar is this: http://vaikhari.org/downloads/Bhagavad%20Gita%20and%20Management.pdf. It was published in 2004. The earliest published source located using a library search engine was this: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/lucknow-times/Karma-is-on-B-school-syllabus/articleshow/419275.cms. This was a Times of India article published on 12 NOV 2006.

Unsourced

 * Published sources should be provided before moving these back into the article

 * The Bhagavad-Gita calls on humanity to dedicate body, mind and soul to pure duty and not to become mental voluptuaries at the mercy of random desires and undisciplined impulses.
 * When doubts haunt me, when disappointments stare me in the face, and I see not one ray of hope on the horizon, I turn to Bhagavad-Gita and find a verse to comfort me; and I immediately begin to smile in the midst of overwhelming sorrow. Those who meditate on the Gita will derive fresh joy and new meanings from it every day.
 * Mahatma Gandhi

 * The Bhagavad-Gita has a profound influence on the spirit of mankind by its devotion to God which is manifested by actions.
 * Dr. Albert Schweitzer

 * The Bhagavad-Gita is the most systematic statement of spiritual evolution of endowing value to mankind. It is one of the most clear and comprehensive summaries of perennial philosophy ever revealed; hence its enduring value is subject not only to India but to all of humanity.
 * Aldous Huxley

 * The Bhagavad-Gita is a true scripture of the human race a living creation rather than a book, with a new message for every age and a new meaning for every civilization.
 * Sri Aurobindo

 * In the morning I bathe my intellect in the stupendous and cosmogonal philosophy of the Bhagavad-Gita, in comparison with which our modern world and its literature seems puny and trivial.
 * Henry David Thoreau

 * The marvel of the Bhagavad-Gita is its truly beautiful revelation of lifes wisdom which enables philosophy to blossom into religion.
 * Herman Hesse

 * The Bhagavad-Gita deals essentially with the spiritual foundation of human existence. It is a call of action to meet the obligations and duties of life; yet keeping in view the spiritual nature and grander purpose of the universe.
 * Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru

 * I owed a magnificent day to the Bhagavad-Gita. It was the first of books; it was as if an empire spoke to us, nothing small or unworthy, but large, serene, consistent, the voice of an old intelligence which in another age and climate had pondered and thus disposed of the same questions which exercise us.
 * Ralph Waldo Emerson

 * The Bhagavad-Gita is an empire of thought and in its philosophical teachings Krishna has all the attributes of the full-fledged monotheistic deity and at the same time the attributes of the Upanisadic absolute.
 * Ralph Waldo Emerson

 * In order to approach a creation as sublime as the Bhagavad-Gita with full understanding it is necessary to attune our soul to it.
 * Rudolph Steiner

 * If one desires to acquire the perfect happiness and freedom while still living in this ever changing world full of troubles and mysteries, then Shrimad Bhagwad Geeta has this knowledge, acquiring which not only can you experience the feeling of freedom in this life but you can take others also to the road to supreme bliss and satisfaction.
 * Sant Sri Asaramji Bapu

 * The Bhagavad-Gita is not seperate from the Vaisnava philosophy and the Srimad Bhagavatam fully reveals the true import of this doctrine which is transmigation of the soul. On perusal of the first chapter of Bhagavad-Gita one may think that they are advised to engage in warfare. When the second chapter has been read it can be clearly understood that knowledge and the soul is the ultimate goal to be attained. On studying the third chapter it is apparent that acts of righteousness are also of high priority. If we continue and patiently take the time to complete the Bhagavad-Gita and try to ascertain the truth of its closing chapter we can see that the ultimate conclusion is to relinquish all the conceptualized ideas of religion which we possess and fully surrender directly unto the Supreme Lord.
 * Swami Prabhupada

 * The secret of karma yoga which is to perform actions without any fruitive desires is taught by Lord Krishna in the Bhagavad-Gita.
 * Vivekananda

 * The Bhagavad-Gita was spoken by Lord Krishna to reveal the science of devotion to God which is the essence of all spiritual knowledge. The Supreme Lord Krishnas primary purpose for descending and incarnating is relieve the world of any demoniac and negative, undesirable influences that are opposed to spiritual development, yet simultaneously it is His  incomparable intention to be perpetually within reach of all humanity.
 * Ramanuja

 * From a clear knowledge of the Bhagavad-Gita all the goals of human existence become fulfilled. Bhagavad-Gita is the manifest quintessence of all the teachings of the Vedic scriptures.
 * Adi Sankara

 * The Bhagavad-Gita is where God Himself talks to His devotee Arjuna.
 * Paramahansa Yogananda

 * Nothing has ever arisen in my life, internal or external, that the Gita has not made clear and enabled me to deal with or understand.
 * Swami Nirmalananda Giri

 * The Gita is the universal mother. I find a solace in the Bhagavadgeeta that I miss even in the Sermon in the Mount. When disappointment stares me in the face and all alone I see not one ray of light, I go back to the Bhagavad Gita. I find a verse here and a verse there, and I immediately begin to smile in the midst of overwhelming tragedies - and my life has been full of external tragedies - and if they have left no visible or indelible scar on me, I owe it all to the teaching of the Bhagavad Gita.
 * Mahatma Gandhi

 * Gita is the mother of all modern sciences
 * [ [Dr. Narendar Bhojak]]
 * Far better to live your own path imperfectly than to live another’s perfectly.
 * This was added without citations of chapter or verse— and though some portions the Gita might indicate such notions, this seems a modern paraphrase or interpretation of some portions, and not an actual translation of any lines. ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 16:07, 22 February 2013 (UTC) + tweak

 * They are not that hard to find out, that where they have came from, hopefully gonna found all soon. Justicejayant (talk) 13:08, 24 July 2013 (UTC)

 * Added. It's 1st lines of 3:35 & 18:47. — 49.249.33.222 05:10, 1 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Ambedkar's quote can't be accepted, as he's more concerned about Caste system than Gita, other than that, the quote by some "Franklin Edgerton", no one knows about. Justicejayant (talk) 06:08, 4 December 2013 (UTC)
 * By saying some "Franklin Edgerton", you're only showing your ignorance about the literature on the Gita. The Gita covers many topics. The caste system is one of them. Ambedkar is criticizing that specific topic by explicitly mentioning the Gita. That clearly looks sufficient a ground for inclusion. — 49.249.33.218 07:47, 4 December 2013 (UTC)
 * If you read the book of franklin edgerton properly, you will find him talking positive about Gita a few times as well.. His views about the book differs from one to other.. For example, he's saying once that ""The most prominent specific ethical principle in the gita is that doing of good to others, treating others as oneself. Yet the injuction to do harm to any living creature, tho it is a logical interference from that principle." 2nd quote, by Ambedkar, if you read the whole quote, you will ultimately find it's conclusion that Ambedkar is actually forcing/promoting buddha in his saying, rather than making comment on this book. Caste system is not by indians, it was made by british, before that it was Varna, which is common anyway. What you are doing is clearly Wikipedia:Cherrypicking, either you can add the whole quote, or don't add anything, unless the quote is not contradictory with the same paragraph/subject. Justicejayant (talk) 05:13, 5 December 2013 (UTC)

Edit war 2013·12·12
About 10 edits to the page ago I had done some work to alphabetize the "About" section and repair some format damage that existed during some of the edits between two editors who seem to have animosities towards each others edits, but hadn’t been able to post it during the disputes. I will get around to posting at least some of that some time after the current lock expires — as I might be leaving soon. ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 16:35, 12 December 2013 (UTC) + tweak
 * Kalki, I will release the current lock - I did sort the About quotes by their author in my most recent edit, but as you say, there may remain some broken aspects to the page that you can rectify. Thanks. ~ UDScott (talk) 16:44, 12 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Thanks. Most of my alphabetizing edits corresponded well with yours, and I afterwards did a bit of format cleanup and further investigation and sourcing on a couple statements. I must be preparing to leave now, at least for a short while. ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 17:21, 12 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Majority of those "external" links were either mis-interpreted, and 3 of them being unreliable, internet trolls commentary, not even notable. Justicejayant (talk) 02:53, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * I think you've some terribly strong prejudice and some serious neutrality issues about the Gita also that you can't take anything labelled Criticism put up there. UDScott, for instance, restored the links; no one else saw any problem with that. But you insist; and that has made the article look less informative and kinda messed up. I think it was in a much better shape before you started trolling it. — 49.249.139.14 03:10, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Couple of more names who translate it as "caste": Franklin Edgerton & W. Douglas P. Hill. — 49.249.139.14 03:23, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * One more name: Eknath Easwaran. — 49.249.139.14 03:28, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher Isherwood do the same (translating varna as caste). And you want me to refer to Google Books! See how unreliable your words are. — 49.249.139.14 03:36, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Also, I don't understand how as many relevant images as possible on the right side of the article is disruptive. Look how the article looks now! Some images are sneaking into the external links section. The article was so tidy before. — 49.249.139.14 03:55, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Everyone has prejudice against some troll links, that are made by some no namer islamist or no namer anti-hindu troll. Majority of translations doesn't use the word 'caste', it's just latest trend to use simpler words, but they often mislead. Justicejayant (talk) 04:16, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * And since you certainly assume Bad Faith for the editions, I would rather assume that we may need to re-write the article, or at least the part of the quotes that are claimed to have been from Bhagavada Gita. Not to mention that some of the copied material is simply Copyvio. Justicejayant (talk) 04:27, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * Aside from arguments on the retention of links which I don't greatly mind, but can actually agree do not seem to be highly significant essays by highly notable scholars, the current dispute seems to be presently focusing on which of 2 relatively obscure translations of a section of Ch. 4 should be used. There are no restrictions on the number of translations which can be used, so I believe BOTH can be retained, but personally would prefer using some more widely published translations for that passage and a few others. I might use a couple of the translations of the Gita I have to start to add material here within the next few weeks, but I do expect to be busy with many other things, and do not expect to get too much done on this page. I would recommend a more extensive argument on this talk page rather than regular reversals of major alterations to the article.  ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 05:20, 13 December 2013 (UTC)
 * I just made an edit which used BOTH recently of the disputed translations — but I believe that this VERY significant section of the Gita and a few others should have longer quotations from more famous translations and will probably start to add more from a couple of others within the next week or so. ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 05:37, 13 December 2013 (UTC)

"am become"
What is this grammar in "I am become death, destroyer of worlds". "Am become..."? What is it, a miss-translation or what? Why not: "I HAVE become..." or simply "I AM..." 2600:1700:4CA1:3C80:8026:9C37:B09E:A713 03:34, 1 December 2017 (UTC)
 * See Present perfect. ~ DanielTom (talk) 11:14, 1 December 2017 (UTC)
 * The page on Oppenheimer says that it was his own translation. This page says "Oppenheimer is quoting from the 1944 Vivekananda-Isherwood translation", however, if you look up the book in question, the line is translated "I am come as Time, the waster of the peoples".
 * https://archive.org/details/in.ernet.dli.2015.133204/page/n87/mode/2up 75.163.131.87 07:40, 25 March 2023 (UTC)

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 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Relayer. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Relayer~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:33, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:55, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Relayer~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Tess xox

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:44, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Tess xox


text:
User talk:Ranger2006

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:44, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Thank you for your welcome! Ranger2006

title: User talk:Ranger2006


text:
User talk:JTB~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called JTB. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name JTB~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:24, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:49, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:JTB~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Caroline777

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Caroline777


text:
User talk:Loki Laufeyson~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Loki Laufeyson. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Loki Laufeyson~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:29, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:52, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Loki Laufeyson~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Meeples~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Meeples. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Meeples~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:30, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:52, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Meeples~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Fegocomo

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Fegocomo


text:
User talk:Toxichottie143~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Toxichottie143. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Toxichottie143~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:37, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 06:00, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Toxichottie143~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Akashtakyar

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Akashtakyar


text:
User talk:Fredhsu

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Fredhsu


text:
User talk:Ggdestro

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Ggdestro


text:
User talk:Fhgirl12x

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 14 August 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Fhgirl12x