text:
Marcel Proust

Valentin Louis Georges Eugène Marcel Proust (10 July 1871 – 18 November 1922) was a French novelist, essayist and critic.

Quotes

 * A sort of egotistical self-evaluation is unavoidable in those joys in which erudition and art mingle and in which aesthetic pleasure may become more acute, but not remain as pure.
 * Preface (1910) to The Bible of Amiens by John Ruskin, translated by Proust (1904); from Marcel Proust: On Reading Ruskin, trans. Jean Autret and Philip J. Wolfe (Yale University Press, 1987, ISBN 0-300-04503-4, p. 53

 * I shall not find a painting more beautiful because the artist has painted a hawthorn in the foreground, though I know of nothing more beautiful than the hawthorn, for I wish to remain sincere and because I know that the beauty of a painting does not depend on the things represented in it. I shall not collect images of hawthorn.  I do not venerate hawthorn, I go to see and smell it.
 * Preface (1910) to The Bible of Amiens by John Ruskin, translated by Proust (1904); from Marcel Proust: On Reading Ruskin, trans. Jean Autret and Philip J. Wolfe (Yale University Press, 1987, ISBN 0-300-04503-4, p. 57

 * A man is not more entitled to be "received in good society," or at least to wish to be, because he is more intelligent and cultivated. This is one of those sophisms that the vanity of intelligent people picks up in the arsenal of their intelligence to justify their basest inclinations. In other words, having become more intelligent creates some rights to be less. Very simply, diverse personalities are to be found in the breast of each of us, and often the life of more than one superior man is nothing but the coexistence of a philosopher and a snob. Actually, there are very few philosophers and artists who are absolutely detached from ambition and respect for power, from "people of position." And among those who are more delicate or more sated, snobism replaces ambition and respect for power in the same way superstition arises on the ruins of religious beliefs. Morality gains nothing there. Between a worldly philosopher and a philosopher intimidated by a minister of state, the second is still the more innocent.
 * Notes to Sesame and Lilies by John Ruskin, translated by Proust (1906); from Marcel Proust: On Reading Ruskin, trans. Jean Autret and William Burford (Yale University Press, 1987, ISBN 0-300-04503-4, p. 152

 * [Music] a pederast might hum when raping a choirboy.
 * Of Fauré's Romances sans paroles Op. 17, as quoted in Orledge Gabriel Fauré (1979), p. 48

In Search of Lost Time / Remembrance of Things Past (1913-1927)

 * À la recherche du temps perdu. [In Search of Lost Time  — also translated as Remembrance of Things Past]; the first six volumes were translated by C. K. Scott-Moncrieff from 1922 to 1930, with a revised translation by Terence Kilmartin in 1981 and a further revision by D.J Enright in 1992. The seventh and final volume was translated by Frederick Blossom and published in 1932. Alternate translations provided as noted.

Vol I: Swann's Way (1913)

 * Du côté de chez Swann
 * See also Swann's Way

 * Même au point de vue des plus insignifiantes choses de la vie, nous ne sommes pas un tout matériellement constitué, identique pour tout le monde et dont chacun n'a qu'à aller prendre connaissance comme d'un cahier des charges ou d'un testament; notre personnalité sociale est une création de la pensée des autres.
 * Even in the most insignificant details of our daily life, none of us can be said to constitute a material whole, which is identical for everyone, and need only be turned up like a page in an account-book or the record of a will; our social personality is created by the thoughts of other people.
 * "Overture"

 * Mais, quand d’un passé ancien rien ne subsiste, après la mort des êtres, après la destruction des choses, seules, plus frêles mais plus vivaces, plus immatérielles, plus persistantes, plus fidèles, l’odeur et la saveur restent encore longtemps, comme des âmes, à se rappeler, à attendre, à espérer, sur la ruine de tout le reste, à porter sans fléchir, sur leur gouttelette presque impalpable, l’édifice immense du souvenir. Et dès que j’eus reconnu le goût du morceau de madeleine trempé dans le tilleul que me donnait ma tante (quoique je ne susse pas encore et dusse remettre à bien plus tard de découvrir pourquoi ce souvenir me rendait si heureux), aussitôt la vieille maison grise sur la rue, où était sa chambre, vint comme un décor de théâtre.
 * When from a long-distant past nothing subsists, after the people are dead, after the things are broken and scattered, still, alone, more fragile, but with more vitality, more unsubstantial, more persistent, more faithful, the smell and taste of things remain poised a long time, like souls, ready to remind us, waiting and hoping for their moment, amid the ruins of all the rest; and bear unfaltering, in the tiny and almost impalpable drop of their essence, the vast structure of recollection. And once again I had recognized the taste of the crumb of madeleine soaked in her decoction of lime-flowers which my aunt used to give me (although I did not yet know and must long postpone the discovery of why this memory made me so happy), immediately the old gray house upon the street, where her room was, rose up like the scenery of a theater.
 * "Overture"

 * Ce n’est pas le mal qui lui donnait l’idée du plaisir, qui lui semblait agréable ; c’est le plaisir qui lui semblait malin.
 * It was not evil that gave her the idea of pleasure, that seemed to her attractive; it was pleasure, rather, that seemed evil.
 * "Combray"

 * Peut-être n’eût-elle pas pensé que le mal fût un état si rare, si extraordinaire, si dépaysant, où il était si reposant d’émigrer, si elle avait su discerner en elle, comme en tout le monde, cette indifférence aux souffrances qu’on cause et qui, quelques autres noms qu’on lui donne, est la forme terrible et permanente de la cruauté.
 * Perhaps she would not have thought that evil was a state so rare, so extraordinary, so disorienting, and to which it was so restful to emigrate, if she had been able to discern in herself, as in everyone else, that indifference to the sufferings one causes which, whatever other names one gives it, is the terrible and lasting form assumed by cruelty.
 * "Combray"

 * À partir de cet instant, je n’avais plus un seul pas à faire, le sol marchait pour moi dans ce jardin où depuis si longtemps mes actes avaient cessé d’être accompagnés d’attention volontaire: l’Habitude venait de me prendre dans ses bras et me portait jusqu’à mon lit comme un petit enfant.
 * From that instant I had not to take another step; the ground moved forward under my feet in that garden where, for so long, my actions had ceased to require any control, or even attention, from my will. Custom came to take me in her arms, carried me all the way up to my bed, and laid me down there like a little child.
 * "Combray"

 * They would have preferred for me, instead of Bloch, companions who would have given me no more than it is proper to give according to the laws of middle-class morality, who would not unexpectedly send me a basket of fruit because they happened, that morning, to have thought of me with affection, but who, being incapable of inclining in my favour, by a simple impulse of imagination and sensibility, the exact balance of the duties and claims of friendship, would be equally incapable of loading the scales to my detriment. Even our faults will not easily divert from the path of their duty towards us those conventional natures of which the model was my great-aunt who, estranged for years from a niece to whom she never spoke, yet made no change in the will in which she left that niece the whole of her fortune, because she was her next-of-kin and it was the 'proper thing to do.'
 * "Combray"

 * Autrefois on rêvait de posséder le cœur de la femme dont on était amoureux; plus tard sentir qu’on possède le cœur d’une femme peut suffire à vous en rendre amoureux.
 * In his younger days a man dreams of possessing the heart of the woman whom he loves; later, the feeling that he possesses the heart of a woman may be enough to make him fall in love with her.
 * "Swann in Love"

 * ''La realité que j'avais connue n'existait plus. Il suffisait que Mme Swann n'arrivât pas toute pareille au même moment, pour que l'Avenue fût autre. Les lieux que nous avons connus n'appartiennent pas qu'au monde de l'espace où nous les situons pour plus de facilité. Ils n'étaient qu’une mince tranche au milieu d'impressions contiguës qui formaient notre vie d'alors ; le souvenir d'une certaine image n'est que le regret d'un certain instant ; et les maisons, les routes, les avenues, sont fugitives, hélas! comme les années.
 * The reality that I had known no longer existed. It sufficed that Mme. Swann did not appear, in the same attire and at the same moment, for the whole avenue to be altered. The places that we have known belong now only to the little world of space on which we map them for our own convenience. None of them was ever more than a thin slice, held between the contiguous impressions that composed our life at that time; remembrance of a particular form is but regret for a particular moment; and houses, roads, avenues are as fugitive, alas, as the years.
 * Place-Names: The Name

Vol II: Within a Budding Grove (1919)

 * À l'ombre des jeunes filles en fleurs
 * See also Within a Budding Grove

 * Our virtues themselves are not free and floating qualities over which we retain a permanent control and power of disposal; they come to be so closely linked in our minds with the actions in conjunction with which we make it our duty to practice them, that, if we are suddenly called upon to perform some action of a different order, it takes us by surprise, and without our supposing for a moment that it might involve the bringing of those very same virtues into play.

 * Fashions, being themselves begotten of the desire for change, are quick to change also.

 * Et non seulement on ne retient pas tout de suite les œuvres vraiment rares, mais même au sein de chacune de ces œuvres-là, et cela m'arriva pour la Sonate de Vinteuil, ce sont les parties les moins précieuses qu'on perçoit d'abord... Moins décevants que la vie, ces grands chefs-d'œuvre ne commencent pas par nous donner ce qu'ils ont de meilleur.
 * And not only does one not seize at once and retain an impression of works that are really great, but even in the content of any such work (as befell me in the case of Vinteuil’s sonata) it is the least valuable parts that one at first perceives... Less disappointing than life is, great works of art do not begin by giving us all their best.
 * Ch. I: "Madame Swann at Home"

 * Ce qu'on appelle la postérité, c'est la postérité de l'œuvre.
 * What artists call posterity is the posterity of the work of art.
 * Ch. I: "Madame Swann at Home"

 * Le temps dont nous disposons chaque jour est élastique; les passions que nous ressentons le dilatent, celles que nous inspirons le rétrécissent et l'habitude le remplit.
 * The time which we have at our disposal every day is elastic; the passions that we feel expand it, those that we inspire contract it; and habit fills up what remains.
 * Ch. I: "Madame Swann at Home"

 * Ce n'est jamais qu'à cause d'un état d'esprit qui n'est pas destiné à durer qu'on prend des résolutions définitives.
 * It is always thus, impelled by a state of mind which is destined not to last, that we make our irrevocable decisions.
 * Ch. I: "Madame Swann at Home"

 * Faced with the thoughts, the actions of a woman whom we love, we are as completely at a loss as the world's first natural philosophers must have been, face to face with the phenomena of nature, before their science had been elaborated and had cast a ray of light over the unknown.

 * Les traits de notre visage ne sont guère que des gestes devenus, par l'habitude, définitifs.
 * The features of our face are hardly more than gestures become, by habit, permanent.
 * Ch. IV: "Seascape, with a Frieze of Girls"

 * On ne reçoit pas la sagesse, il faut la découvrir soi-même après un trajet que personne ne peut faire pour nous, ne peut nous épargner.
 * We are not provided with wisdom, we must discover it for ourselves, after a journey through the wilderness which no one else can take for us, an effort which no one can spare us.
 * Ch. IV: "Seascape, with a Frieze of Girls"

 * [Le bonheur] est, dans l'amour, un état anormal.
 * In love, happiness is an abnormal state.

Vol III: The Guermantes Way (1920)

 * Le Côté de Guermantes

 * Tout ce que nous connaissons de grand nous vient des nerveux. Ce sont eux et non pas d'autres qui ont fondé les religions et composé les chefs-d'œuvre.
 * Translation: Everything great in the world comes from neurotics. They alone have founded our religions and composed our masterpieces.
 * Volume I

Vol. IV: Cities of the Plain (1921-1922)

 * Sodome et Gomorrhe

 * Il n'y avait pas d'anormaux quand l'homosexualité était la norme.
 * There was nothing abnormal about it when homosexuality was the norm.
 * Pt. I

 * Comme tous les gens qui ne sont pas amoureux, il s'imaginait qu'on choisit la personne qu'on aime après mille délibérations et d'après des qualités et convenances diverses.
 * Like everybody who is not in love, he imagined that one chose the person whom one loved after endless deliberations and on the strength of various qualities and advantages.
 * Pt. II, Ch. 1

 * La maladie est le plus écouté des médecins: à la bonté, au savoir on ne fait que promettre; on obéit à la souffrance.
 * Illness is the doctor to whom we pay most heed; to kindness, to knowledge, we make promises only; pain we obey.
 * Pt. II, Ch. 1

 * Nous désirons passionnément qu'il y ait une autre vie où nous serions pareils à ce que nous sommes ici-bas. Mais nous ne réfléchissons pas que, même sans attendre cette autre vie, dans celle-ci, au bout de quelques années, nous sommes infidèles à ce que nous avons été, à ce que nous voulions rester immortellement.
 * We passionately long that there may be another life in which we shall be similar to what we are here below. But we do not pause to reflect that, even without waiting for that other life, in this life, after a few years we are unfaithful to what we have been, to what we wished to remain immortally.
 * Pt. II, Ch. 2

Vol. V: The Captive (1923)

 * La Prisonnière

 * Le seul véritable voyage, le seul bain de Jouvence, ce ne serait pas d'aller vers de nouveaux paysages, mais d'avoir d'autres yeux, de voir l'univers avec les yeux d'un autre, de cent autres, de voir les cent univers que chacun d'eux voit, que chacun d'eux est.
 * The only true voyage of discovery, the only fountain of Eternal Youth, would be not to visit strange lands but to possess other eyes, to behold the universe through the eyes of another, of a hundred others, to behold the hundred universes that each of them beholds, that each of them is.
 * Ch. II: "The Verdurins Quarrel with M. de Charlus"

 * L'amour, c'est l'espace et le temps rendus sensibles au coeur.
 * Love is space and time made tender to the heart.
 * Variant translations:
 * Love is space and time made sensitive to the heart.
 * Love is space and time measured by the heart.

 * L'adultère introduit l'esprit dans la lettre que bien souvent le mariage eût laissée morte.
 * Adultery breathes new life into marriages which have been left for dead.

Vol. VI: The Sweet Cheat Gone (1925)

 * Albertine disparue. Also known as La fugitive

 * Les liens entre un être et nous n'existent que dans notre pensée. La mémoire en s'affaiblissant les relâche, et, malgré l'illusion dont nous voudrions être dupes et dont, par amour, par amitié, par politesse, par respect humain, par devoir, nous dupons les autres, nous existons seuls. L'homme est l'être qui ne peut sortir de soi, qui ne connaît les autres qu'en soi, et, en disant le contraire, ment.
 * The bonds that unite another person to ourself exist only in our mind. Memory as it grows fainter relaxes them, and notwithstanding the illusion by which we would fain be cheated and with which, out of love, friendship, politeness, deference, duty, we cheat other people, we exist alone. Man is the creature that cannot emerge from himself, that knows his fellows only in himself; when he asserts the contrary, he is lying.
 * Ch. I: "Grief and Oblivion"

 * Nous n'arrivons pas à changer les choses selon notre désir, mais peu à peu notre désir change. La situation que nous espérions changer parce qu'elle nous était insupportable, nous devient indifférente. Nous n'avons pas pu surmonter l'obstacle, comme nous le voulions absolument, mais la vie nous l'a fait tourner, dépasser, et c'est à peine alors si en nous retournant vers le lointain du passé nous pouvons l'apercevoir, tant il est devenu imperceptible.
 * We do not succeed in changing things according to our desire, but gradually our desire changes. The situation that we hoped to change because it was intolerable becomes unimportant. We have not managed to surmount the obstacle, as we were absolutely determined to do, but life has taken us round it, led us past it, and then if we turn round to gaze at the remote past, we can barely catch sight of it, so imperceptible has it become.
 * Ch. I: "Grief and Oblivion"

 * Une femme est d'une plus grande utilité pour notre vie si elle y est, au lieu d'un élément de bonheur, un instrument de chagrin, et il n'y en a pas une seule dont la possession soit aussi précieuse que celle des vérités qu'elle nous découvre en nous faisant souffrir.
 * A woman is of greater service to our life if she is in it, instead of being an element of happiness, an instrument of sorrow, and there is not a woman in the world the possession of whom is as precious as that of the truths which she reveals to us by causing us to suffer.
 * Ch. I: "Grief and Oblivion"

 * On ne guérit d'une souffrance qu'à condition de l'éprouver pleinement.
 * We are healed of a suffering only by experiencing it to the full.
 * Ch. I: "Grief and Oblivion"

 * Il n'y a pas une idée qui ne porte en elle sa réfutation possible, un mot, le mot contraire.
 * There is no idea that does not carry in itself a possible refutation, no word that does not imply its opposite.
 * Ch. II: "Mademoiselle de Forcheville"

 * Aussi, les demeures disposées des deux côtés du chenal faisaient penser à des sites de la nature, mais d'une nature qui aurait créé ses œvres avec une imagination humaine.
 * In this way, the mansions arranged along either bank of the canal made one think of objects of nature, but of a nature which seemed to have created its works with a human imagination.
 * Ch. III: Venise

Vol. VII: The Past Recaptured (1927)

 * Le temps retrouvé —also translated as "Time Regained" and "Finding Time Again"

 * Par l’art seulement, nous pouvons sortir de nous, savoir ce que voit un autre de cet univers qui n’est pas le même que le nôtre et dont les paysages nous seraient restés aussi inconnus que ceux qu’il peut y avoir dans la lune. Grâce à l’art, au lieu de voir un seul monde, le nôtre, nous le voyons se multiplier, et autant qu’il y a d’artistes originaux, autant nous avons de mondes à notre disposition, plus différents les uns des autres que ceux qui roulent dans l’infini et qui, bien des siècles après qu’est éteint le foyer dont il émanait, qu’il s’appelât Rembrandt ou Vermeer, nous envoient encore leur rayon spécial. Ce travail de l’artiste, de chercher à apercevoir sous la matière, sous de l’expérience, sous des mots, quelque chose de différent, c’est exactement le travail inverse de celui que, à chaque minute, quand nous vivons détourné de nous-même, l’amour-propre, la passion, l’intelligence, et l’habitude aussi accomplissent en nous, quand elles amassent au-dessus de nos impressions vraies, pour nous les cacher entièrement, les nomenclatures, les buts pratiques que nous appelons faussement la vie.
 * By art alone we are able to get outside ourselves, to know what another sees of this universe which for him is not ours, the landscapes of which would remain as unknown to us as those of the moon. Thanks to art, instead of seeing one world, our own, we see it multiplied and as many original artists as there are, so many worlds are at our disposal, differing more widely from each other than those which roll round the infinite and which, whether their name be Rembrandt or Vermeer, send us their unique rays many centuries after the hearth from which they emanate is extinguished. This labour of the artist to discover a means of apprehending beneath matter and experience, beneath words, something different from their appearance, is of an exactly contrary nature to the operation in which pride, passion, intelligence and habit are constantly engaged within us when we spend our lives without self-communion, accumulating as though to hide our true impressions, the terminology for practical ends which we falsely call life.
 * Ch. III: "An Afternoon Party at the House of the Princesse de Guermantes"

 * Le bonheur est salutaire pour le corps, mais c'est le chagrin qui développe les forces de l'esprit.
 * Happiness is beneficial for the body but it is grief that develops the powers of the mind.
 * Ch. III: "An Afternoon Party at the House of the Princesse de Guermantes"

 * Quant au bonheur, il n’a presque qu’une seule utilité, rendre le malheur possible.
 * Happiness serves hardly any other purpose than to make unhappiness possible.
 * Ch. III: "An Afternoon Party at the House of the Princesse de Guermantes"

 * If at least, time enough were alloted to me to accomplish my work, I would not fail to mark it with the seal of Time, the idea of which imposed itself upon me with so much force to-day, and I would therein describe men, if need be, as monsters occupying a place in Time infinitely more important than the restricted one reserved for them in space, a place, on the contrary, prolonged immeasurably since, simultaneously touching widely separated years and the distant periods they have lived through — between which so many days have ranged themselves — they stand like giants immersed in Time.
 * Final lines, Ch. III : An afternoon party at the house of the Princesse de Guermantes"; translation by Stephen Hudson, Time Regained (1931)
 * If enough time was left to me to complete my work, my first concern would be to describe the people in it, even at the risk of making them seem colossal and unnatural creatures, as occupying a place far larger than the very limited one reserved for them in space, a place in fact almost infinitely extended, since they are in simultaneous contact, like giants immersed in the years, with such distant periods of their lives, between which so many days have taken up their place – in Time.
 * Translation by Ian Patterson, Finding Time Again (2002)

Quotes about Proust

 * The son of well-to-do parents who … engages in a so-called intellectual profession, as an artist or a scholar, will have a particularly difficult time with those bearing the distasteful title of colleagues. It is not merely that his independence is envied, the seriousness of his intentions mistrusted, that he is suspected of being a secret envoy of the established powers. … The real resistance lies elsewhere. The occupation with things of the mind has by now itself become “practical,” a business with strict division of labor, departments and restricted entry. The man of independent means who chooses it out of repugnance for the ignominy of earning money will not be disposed to acknowledge the fact. For this he is punished. He … is ranked in the competitive hierarchy as a dilettante no matter how well he knows his subject, and must, if he wants to make a career, show himself even more resolutely blinkered than the most inveterate specialist. The urge to suspend the division of labor which, within certain limits, his economic situation enables him to satisfy, is thought particularly disreputable: it betrays a disinclination to sanction the operations imposed by society, and domineering competence permits no such idiosyncrasies. The departmentalization of mind is a means of abolishing mind where it is not exercised ex officio, under contract. It performs this task all the more reliably since anyone who repudiates this division of labor—if only by taking pleasure in his work—makes himself vulnerable by its standards, in ways inseparable from elements of his superiority. Thus is order ensured: some have to play the game because they cannot otherwise live, and those who could live otherwise are kept out because they do not want to play the game.
 * Theodor Adorno, "Für Marcel Proust," Minima Moralia, E. Jephcott, trans. (1974)

 * (What's the difference between a spokesman and a witness?) A spokesman assumes that he is speaking for others. I never assumed that I never assumed that I could...No society can smash the social contract and be exempt from the consequences, and the consequences are chaos for everybody in the society. (Are there any white writers you would describe as witnesses?) Dostoyevsky, Dickens, James, Proust.
 * 1984 interview in Conversations with James Baldwin edited by Louis H. Pratt and Fred L. Standley (1989)

 * Proust's scansions often cross vast distances, and move with an assured step between microcosm and macrocosm. They show him to have been a metaphysical wit possessed of a strong liking for physics, and an 'interdisciplinarist' beyond the dreams of the modern university.
 * Malcolm Bowie,

 * (PB: In some writers the visual imagination doesn’t seem to count for much. But then there is Henry James, or Proust.) NG: Yes, in Proust one sees everything.
 * Natalia Ginzburg Interview (1992)

 * My bed usually looks like Proust’s bed; my whole life is lived there.
 * Louise Glück Interview (2014)

 * The last novel that I wrote in that way was A Guest of Honour and even then it had elements obviously influenced by my great mentor, Marcel Proust, and many others whose work I read when I was young. But they go unacknowledged because, as someone said, they taught you something and then you forget that they taught it to you and you carry on from there. Indeed, people are rather amazed when I say that I had and continue to have this feeling that I was tremendously influenced, like so many writers, by Proust. My view of the world was changed by him; a film was peeled off my eyes and I understood my life and my own emotions in a way profoundly influenced by him.
 * 1983 interview in Conversations with Nadine Gordimer edited by Nancy Topping Bazin and Marilyn Dallman Seymour (1990)

 * Proust was the greatest novelist of the twentieth century, just as Tolstoy was in the nineteenth.
 * Graham Greene, as quoted in Sollars, Jennings, The Facts on File Companion to the World Novel: 1900 to the Present (2008), p. v

 * You can't imitate Proust.
 * 1982 interview in Conversations with Ursula Le Guin (2008)

 * that writer-snob Marcel Proust
 * Osip Mandelstam ON TRANSLATIONS translated into English in The complete critical prose (1997)

 * We write, like Proust, to render all of it eternal, and to persuade ourselves that it is eternal.
 * February 1954 The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 5 as quoted in Woman as Writer (1978) by Jeannette L. Webber and Joan Grumman, p. 38

 * here the artist has often set the problem. In tracing the connection between art and science, we see that the flow is as often from art as toward it. Proust is one of the pioneers of the memory, and his problem is only now beginning to be taken up by the psychiatrists and the mathematicians.
 * Muriel Rukeyser The Life of Poetry (1949)

 * The questions are raised, even with the older questions, like Proust's madeleine, still setting challenges to the sciences.
 * Muriel Rukeyser The Life of Poetry (1949)

 * Life is too short, and Proust is too long.
 * Attributed to Anatole France, who notoriously was featured in Proust's work (as Bergotte) but did not read it, but this appears to be an invention due to . Earliest appearance is in English, in The Decade of Illusion: Paris 1918–1928, Maurice Sachs (1933), p. 69:
 * ...something to read on the voyage. France said, "Here, my friend. Life is short; Proust is long. Take this." And Wasserman carried off the rare treasure.
 * In French it is considered an English phrase (dicton anglais), and in the French edition of The Decade of Illusion Sachs gives France completely different words, La Décade de l'illusion (1950), p. 96:
 * «Tenez, mon bon, prenez celui-ci, je ne tiens pas à le lire, mais on en parle beaucoup dans ce moment.» Wasserman emporta ce rare trésor.
 * "Here, my friend, take this one, I don't plan to read it, but it is much talked about at present." Wasserman carried off the rare treasure.

title: Marcel Proust


text:
Dr. Dolittle (film)

Dr. Dolittle is a 1998 American comedy film starring Eddie Murphy as a doctor who discovers that he has the ability to talk to (and understand) animals. The film was inspired by the series of children's stories of the same name by Hugh Lofting, but used no material from any of the novels. The principal connection is the name and a doctor who can speak to animals, although the pushmi-pullyu, a feature of the books, makes a very brief appearance in a couple of scenes.

John Dolittle

 * [after hearing Rodney speak] See, those guys in my dorm told me that stuff wouldn't affect me. [starts to cry] Now, fifteen years later, this shit starts happenin' to me!

Dialogue

 * Young John: Why do dogs sniff each other's butts?
 * Prologue Dog: Well, this is kinda our way of shaking hands. If you really wanna get a sense of who somebody really is, you gotta sniff their butt.
 * Archer: Son! Stop talking to the dog. She doesn't understand a word that you're saying.

 * Young John: [about the prologue dog after she is given up for adoption] She was my best friend.
 * Archer: You'll make some real friends now.
 * Lucky: From that day on, John Dolittle never spoke to animals again.
 * Archer: Someday, you're gonna thank me for this.

 * John: Who's this?
 * Rodney: I'll give you a hint. I'm cute, I'm furry, and I make five hundred babies a year!

 * Rodney: [in his cage, on top of John's car] Oh, stop, slow down!
 * John: Shut up! I can hear you up there, shut up!
 * Rodney: Come on, Doc! I'm getting whisker-whipped up here!
 * John: One more word and I'll pull over and take you off the car, I'll let you out of your cage, and leave you in the wild! With the REAL animals! See how much talk you do when a couple of real squirrels are kickin' in your ass!
 * Rodney: Fine, then I'll just sing! [sings] The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind... You know it is!
 * John: Turnin' up the radio! [turns on the radio at full volume]
 * Rodney: This guinea pig is blowin' in the wind...! Come on!
 * John: I can't hear you! I'm grooving'!
 * Rodney: Hey, why do they call me "guinea pig", anyway? I'm not Italian, and I'm not pork!

 * Jacob: Ah, what's the use? It's not like anybody cares about tigers anyway, you know?
 * John: Now stop, you're being silly. Listen - there have been lots and lots and lots of lovable tigers.
 * Jacob: Yeah? Name one.
 * Lucky: [short silence] How about Tony?
 * John: Tony the cereal tiger?
 * Lucky: What? I didn't hear you come up with anything.
 * John: [snaps his fingers and claps] Oh! Remember that song "Eye of the Tiger" from Rocky III? [singing off-key] "It's the eye of the tiger, it's the da-da-da..." That one from Rocky III! When Rocky was fighting Mr. T, couldn't beat Mr. T - then Apollo Creed played "Eye of the Tiger" for him, he went back and beat the snot out of Mr. T because of "Eye of the Tiger". Because of that song! It moved him inside! Not "Eye of the Moose", not "Eye of the Bull," "Eye of the Tiger"!
 * Jacob: That's it. I'm jumping.
 * John: No, no, no, don't jump--!
 * Rat 2: [from the ground] Just jump, ya big pussy!
 * Rat 1: Come on, ya little scaredy cat!
 * Rat 2: I'll catch ya! Not! [laughs]
 * John: Didn't I say take a break?! [screams]
 * Rat 1: All right, Doc! Then you jump!

 * John: It's not really something you should be ashamed of. It happens to most men occasionally. You're probably under a lot of pressure.
 * Female Pigeon: He's not under pressure. He's not attracted to me because I'm just a pigeon! He's a self-hating pigeon!
 * Male Pigeon: Oh, th-that is not true.
 * Female Pigeon: Ask him what he does all day. Go ahead, ask him.
 * John: What do--?
 * Male Pigeon: I sit in a tree by myself.
 * Female Pigeon: It's because he's too good to eat with the rest of us when the old people feed us in the park.
 * John: Can I say something?
 * Female Pigeon: And the way he stares at a robin's breast? It's enough to make you sick!
 * Male Pigeon: They're orange! I happen to be attracted to orange breasts, they're orange--
 * Female Pigeon: You're not a robin! You're not a dove or a hawk! You're a pigeon, and I'm a pigeon...
 * Male Pigeon: [over her] I'm sorry, she sits on that nest all day long, and she just gets a little crazy...
 * Female Pigeon: [over him] ...and I've been sitting on a nest with three eggs, and they're gonna be pigeons too! [flies away]
 * Male Pigeon: But may I ask you something? If I turn this way, don't I look a little like a blue jay?

 * John: You're suffering from what's called obsessive-compulsive behavior.
 * Obsessive Dog: Throw the ball, throw the ball, throw the ball!
 * John: Whenever you want the ball, I want you to think about something else.
 * Obsessive Dog: Don't say anything more, just throw the ball!
 * John: Can you relax your mind?
 * Obsessive Dog: [bounces up and down] This is the way it works: you're the person, you throw the ball, I'm the dog, I get it! Simple as that!
 * John: Okay, all right, listen. Ooh! Look at you goin'. All right...
 * Obsessive Dog: I swear, I swear, I'll pee on your carpet. Please!
 * John: It's very irritating, this ball thing...
 * Obsessive Dog: Please throw the ball! Shut up and throw the ball. Am I alone here?! Am I all by myself?! Am I in another universe?!
 * Lucky and Rodney: THROW THE DAMN BALL!!
 * [John throws it]
 * Obsessive Dog: [runs after it] HE THREW THE BALL! OH, HE THREW THE BALL! I'll get it! I'll get it! [grabs the ball and brings it back] Oh! I love you! I love you! You threw the ball!
 * Rodney: You can't save 'em all, Hasselhoff.

 * John: What are you doing here?
 * Lucky: I crossed three freeways to rescue you, and all I get is "What are you doing here?"
 * John: This isn't a prison, it's a clinic!
 * Lucky: Look, the tiger's in bad shape.
 * John: The tiger?! Hey, listen, forget the tiger! Let me tell you something! I had a perfect life until you came along and started talkin' to me. Now I'm sittin' here in a robe discussin' Mr. Ed with these guys! You've ruined my life enough, I don't wanna talk to you anymore, just go away. Just get outta here, please, go, this is crazy!
 * Lucky: Oh, I get it. Now it's crazy to want to save a tiger's life.
 * John: Listen, tigers die every day. It's called nature.
 * Lucky: Let me tell you a little about nature. I'm a dog, and I act like a dog. I don't try to be anybody else. We are who we are, and you are a doctor who can talk to animals. That's who you are!
 * John: That is not who I am!
 * Lucky: Stop lying to yourself!
 * John: Didn't I tell you to get outta here?! Get outta here! Go! Get outta here! Get outta here!
 * Lucky: [about to leave] Fine.
 * John: Stop comin' around here talkin' to me!
 * Lucky: [turns back] With pleasure!
 * John: You better not come back! [screams]
 * Lucky: Bonehead. [leaves]
 * John: [to any nearby animals] That's all of y'all! LEAVE ME ALONE! STOP TALKIN' TO ME!!
 * Lucky: [on his way out] Ruined his life, that's a laugh.
 * [John screams three times; as he walks back inside, he notices other patients watching him; he screams at them]

 * Maya: Can I tell you a secret?
 * Archer: Yeah, sure.
 * Maya: When Mommy told me what happened to Daddy, I wasn't afraid, I was happy, because I believed that he could talk to animals. I want Dad to be weird, just like me. Is that wrong?
 * Archer: No. No, it's not wrong.
 * Maya: It's just... sometimes, I don't think he likes me very much.
 * Archer: Honey, he loves you.
 * Maya: I know he loves me, but I don't think he likes me. And I really want him to. I'm gonna try to do things his way, Grandpa, and stop doing these stupid experiments.
 * Archer: No, Maya. Don't stop your experiments. Sometimes... daddies are the ones who need to change. [looks pointedly at John]

 * Lisa: He still thinks he can talk to animals!
 * Archer: He can, Lisa. He can talk to animals. It all started when he was a kid. I didn't know what to do.
 * Lisa: What are you saying, Dad?
 * Archer: I thought it was a handicap... but it's a gift, Lisa. Don't you believe it? Look. See for yourself.

 * Baby Alligator: Mama?
 * Rodney: Mama? I'm not your mama.
 * Baby Alligator: Mama?
 * Lucky: Oh no, don't look at me. Though there was that one time I got drunk in the Everglades...

About

 * I did Dolittle for a particular reason. I wanted to do an extremely commercial movie. I love animals and I love Eddie Murphy, so I thought, "Here is a really commercial movie". I would never have thought I would have done something like this. The script wasn't particularly good when I started. It got a lot better, and it allowed me to form this company and hire Jenno Topping as my producer.
 * Betty Thomas Los Angeles Times (April 2, 2000)

Cast

 * Dr. John Dolittle - Eddie Murphy
 * Archer Dolittle - Ossie Davis
 * Dr. Mark Weller - Oliver Platt
 * Lisa Dolittle - Kristen Wilson
 * Dr. Fish - Jeffrey Tambor
 * Maya Dolittle - Kyla Pratt
 * Charisse Dolittle - Raven-Symoné

Voice cast

 * Lucky - Norm Macdonald
 * Jacob - Albert Brooks
 * Rodney - Chris Rock
 * Prologue Dog - Ellen DeGeneres
 * Rat #1 - Reni Santoni
 * Rat #2 - John Leguizamo
 * Obsessive Dog - Gilbert Gottfried
 * Female Pigeon - Julie Kavner
 * Male Pigeon - Garry Shandling
 * Owl - Jenna Elfman

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: Dr. Dolittle (film)


text:
Donkey Kong Country

This page contains the quotes from the Donkey Kong Country series of electronic platforming games first released in 1994 by Nintendo, as well as the animated series based on it. The series typically depicts a feud between a family of great apes and Old World monkeys and the king of an army of various reptiles.

Donkey Kong

 * "Donkey all confused".
 * "Banana-slamma!!!!!"
 * "I was gonna call [Cranky] something else, but... you were present".
 * "Aye aye, nose nose, throat throat, ablast me hardlies, and shiver me tree trunks!"
 * Its finally over. Now, how do you get outta here? (screams, than fall into a trap and close the trap, than kick off the feet)
 * "Hmmm, to know everything, I must give up everything... HEY! Little buddy, I'm giving you my tie collection!"
 * "Ohh... feels like I got the stuffing knocked out of me... Oh no! I did get the stuffing knocked out of me! Where's my stuffing?!"
 * "Arr, you got me confused with someone else. I'm Donkey Kroc the pirate, arr, and I'm looking for Donkey Kong the (mimics monkey) ape".
 * "That's not mine! Look, there's still a piece of banana inside! I never leave a banana bit! Can I have it?"
 * "I've never known any problem that couldn't be solved with a little nap".
 * "Help, Diddy! I've fallen, and I can't get up! Can you pass me a banana, little buddy?"
 * "It's hard to believe anybody this cute could have everybody so mad at him".
 * "It's the company's fault for making you want it so much".
 * "Back off or I'll have to slam you".
 * "It's more fun bein' in one of these biplanes than on top of some skyscraper!"
 * "I got a bad feeling about this, Cranky sounded really mad".
 * "I'll shower you in Coconut Cream Pie".

Diddy Kong

 * "I'm Diddy! Ooh Ahh!"
 * "Woah!"
 * "Ah, never fear, Diddy's here. Just shove an hors d'ouvres plate in front of me and I can find a crab with my eyes closed. HERE, CRAPPY! CRAPPY! Here, Crappy, Crappy..."
 * [Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "You just lost my lucky ball!"
 * "Only one thing worse than a bruised banana... a bruised butt".
 * "Why couldn't you have disappeared forever instead of my ball?"
 * "Not unless you got a weedwacker and a couple of hours".
 * "That sounded like a zebra having his stripes removed".
 * "Pay no attention to the monkey behind the monkey!"
 * "Aliens are taking over Kongo Bongo and all anyone's doing about it is getting their hair done!"
 * "Jeepin' jungleberries! How can I be an evil ruler if I can't attack the enemy in a helicopter? Oh, that's SO unfair, I HATE that..."
 * [Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "This is all Bluster’s fault! That BONEHEADED BABOON always messes things up and makes us look bad!"
 * [Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh, I do have a future. I do, I do".
 * [Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh! Those no-good dirty rotten low-down yellow-bellied thievin' slime-sucking salamanders!!"
 * [Turns red & angrily throws cap on the ground and starts jumping on it] "Oh, I know that. I'm saying this is a treasure map. X marks the spot!"
 * "There's no such thing as Bog Monsters".

Cranky Kong

 * "You're only reading this because you're bored!"
 * "Donkey, I've had enough! That tie - turn it down!"
 * "Get out of my tent now, you cheeky ape!! Wait till I tell your parents".
 * "They can't keep this level of graphics up for much longer! We used to be lucky if we only got three shades of grey, let alone any real colors!"
 * "What am I doing here? I could ask you what you're doing here, all of you! But I know - wrecking my vacation, that's what! First bees, then ants, now you and those overstuffed alligators are the icing on the cake!"
 * "Troff's a pig, Scoff's a hippo, and both are big, slow, and useless".
 * "Ah, the rare flora-dora orchid. And today's the one day a year you bloom for five seconds, when the sun is in exactly... that position. Say cheese! I've only got five seconds. Work with me here. Hey, how come you're still here? The sun should've shifted. Great jumpin' bananas! The sun's not moving! That can't be good..."
 * "It sounds crazy, but so is everything else that's happened today!"
 * "I can't believe you're still reading this! What you need is a good trashing!"
 * "Does anyone ever actually use these memo pages? Waste of paper if you ask me!"
 * "Tired of me? You're lucky I'm here to brighten up this boring manual!"
 * "Err... Nope! None of these baddies are in! They must have slipped in the wrong instruction manual or something!"
 * "Copy?! Who'd want to copy this game?"
 * "Someone sure has a vivid imagination! I've been everywhere and I can tell you that none of these places actually exist!"
 * "What's going on here? Dixie should be the damsel in distress, not one of the stars!"
 * "Look!...look at this!...as I rock, my beard swings! Waste of frames in my opinion!"
 * "I wouldn't believe a word of this! I've been everywhere and I found only two locations, bad ones at that!"
 * "Look at the fancy box. Look at the size of this instruction manual. You don't think they would have gone to all this trouble if the game was any good, do you?!"
 * "Until then, I got a little tip for ya, DK". [DK: "Yeah? What's that?"] "GO HOME AND LET ME GET SOME SLEEP!!"
 * "Arrrrgh! This story's even worse than DKC! They're really scraping the bottom of the barrel this time!"
 * "Bah! The lad had a couple of frames in DKC and now he thinks he's a big star!"
 * "So let's see what nonsense they've made up for this game, shall we? Hmm... well, I have to hand it to them. This time they've managed to come up with a decent storyline that doesn't involve the usual golden bananas. Only joking kids! This one's worse than all the previous efforts put together! I know you probably aren't expecting a best seller, but wait till you hear this load of rubbish..."
 * "[Diddy is] quick, nimble and courageous but still a bit of a lightweight when compared to my fine physique. He's also got this new-fangled thing he calls a Jetbarrel, but it sounds like nothing more than a lot of hot air to me".
 * "Tiny can also shrink in size--although I reckon that one's nothing more than a marketing gimmick and won't even be in the game!"
 * "Those silly stretchy arms give [Lanky] plenty of potential, but I'm sure he'll be too busy clowning around to be of much use".
 * "Just remember that we rightfully expect our expertise to be rewarded, so do collect a good haul of Banana Bunch Coins before you even think about disturbing me, won't you?"
 * "My powerful potions will give you abilities you've never dreamed of and certainly don't deserve, assuming of course you can afford my modest asking fee. Now don't you go asking me for a potion of gameplay, as even my genius can't rescue this game from its rightful destiny in the bargain bin".
 * "I could defeat [K. Rool] single-handedly of course, but then you wouldn't have a game to play would you?"
 * "I knew they'd have to have something like this. The Kongs will be so weighed down with all the garbage they have to collect, I can't see them getting past the second level. You can view all this silly nonsense and some other stuff I don't understand by pressing START during your game".
 * "Now where did they put the level I designed? Hmm... I can't seem to find it. It was called the 'Great Girder Grapple' as I remember. Oooh, I must have spent at least 3 minutes working on it. I even drew them a fancy little picture. Bah! It must have been too good for them. The kids would have refused to play their fancy 3-D levels once they'd gotten a taste of my 2-D girder action! Don't give up hope though; they might have hidden it somewhere like a priceless gem, hoping that no one will ever find it..."
 * "Elsewhere [in Gloomy Galleon], you'll find a hulking structure that's a bit dim and doesn't work. Yes, I know you already know about Chunky, but this is also true of a eerie lighthouse. Let's see if you can get them both working and be of some use".
 * "Tough luck kid. I've been told to keep my mouth shut, as they want to keep all the good stuff for a money-making strategy guide. I'm sure some of it will appear on the newfangled 'internet' thing as well, so I suggest you take a look-see there. You could also ask your friends, assuming of course you've got any. If all else fails, you'll just have to play better".
 * "The best switch is the one on top of your N64, as you can turn off your silly 3-D adventure and let me get some sleep".
 * "Do you think you two apes can break up your party long enough to fix up my roof?"
 * "So you've reached the bonus game then, have you? It's not a simple game of questions and answers this time though! Now you've got to beat yours truly if you want to win any prizes!"
 * "You fraudster! I'm off to consult my lawyers about this!"
 * "I can't be bothered to tell you any more [about Snide], so you'll have to ask him what he's doing in this game when you meet him".
 * "[DK is] the leader of this mangy bunch and tells me that he has learned a whole new bunch of 'mean, reptile-stomping' moves. I doubt whether they will be any better than his old ones, but we shall see, shan't we?"
 * "Funky stocks the following shooters, all of which can hopefully be upgraded, if you can get that far into the game without falling asleep".
 * "[Golden Bananas are] The most precious item in the game, apart from me, of course. You'll need plenty of these to progress through the levels. If you find more than ten, I'll be surprised".
 * "Special? Hah! I'd sure like to know what makes these [items] any better than the others; they look just as useless to me. Probably because they're slightly larger and a little shinier, I suppose".
 * "Also found in the level lobbies, the information concealed behind these [Wrinkly doors] should be used as a last resort only (or as a first resort if you are a really poor player)".
 * "Let me know if you find a bananaport that can take me out of this sorry game, and I'll be there in a flash".
 * "Jump in these to be transformed into an animal buddy. I just hope they've included poor old Winky and Expresso this time instead of that bone-brained rhino that always seems to get in the games".
 * "All right. If you somehow get back safely from this and bring back that good-for-nothing Donkey with you, I'll admit that maybe you have what it takes after all. But if you don't there will never be more than cheap cameo roles for you in the future, my boy".
 * "I've never seen so much worthless rubbish! I'm surprised they don't give you a special 'trash barrel' to haul it all around in!"
 * "Visit me first and give me all your coins! I'm far more useful than these other sad-looking bums!"

Other Kongs

 * "Why is there not an election to determine the future ruler of Kongo Bongo?" ~Blast Off
 * "When ya wanna be there like now, Funky's Flights is the way to go!" ~Funky
 * "I'm just one sneaky, peeping, two-bit step away from becoming an even richer richest ape on Kongo Bongo Island - and that's rich". ~Bluster
 * "Hey DK! I made your favorite! It's a 3-layer cake! Bananas, bananas, and bananas!" ~Candy
 * "Marry me, Candy, and everything that's mine is yours, except for what's in this prenuptial agreement". ~Bluster
 * "Too late, lizard lips! The babes went cruisin' with what you're losin' from the second you made the scene!" ~Funky
 * "Wait a minute, not so fast! I want to go over that 'richer-poorer' part again with my lawyer!" ~Bluster
 * "Can't we get this show on the road? I'm losing a fortune standing around here!" ~Bluster
 * "Whoa! Check it out, dudes! Never saw green clouds before... well, maybe once. Hey! Where'd all that water come from?!" ~Funky, while flying upside-down
 * "There, how could Candy possibly resist me now? (looks at his comb) What's this? Hair? My hair?? AAH! My hair's falling out!!" ~Bluster
 * "I can't use this. So what if I've lost a bit of hair? ...AAH! MORE HAIR!! I'm shedding!" ~Bluster
 * "I'd rather go on the picnic with your stupid robot than with you!" ~Candy
 * "That unimaginative Donkey Kong would be more than happy to trade whatever treasure he finds for a... station wagon to cargo his bananas around". ~Bluster
 * "Finally, somebody who speaks my language! Welcome, bro!" ~Funky
 * "Uh-oh!" ~Dixie
 * "You want to see the Lost World? What channel is that on, Dixie?" ~Wrinkly
 * "Writing? Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that involve knowing something like, say, the alphabet?" ~Bluster
 * "Like the terminal dude said... I'll be back!" ~Funky
 * "Hey, I think you've played this game before, haven't you?!" ~Swanky
 * "I'm glad Cranky doesn't know about this new console. If he did, I'd never be able to get him off it!" ~Wrinkly
 * "Ssshhhh, Kongs! I'm on my last life and you're breaking my concentration!" ~Wrinkly
 * "Oh! That Donkey Kong. Is there some sort of world that says boyfriends always have to be late? Well, this time, I'm not taking "Jeez! Sorry, Candy! I forgot" for an answer, the big ape might not know it, but he's in big trouble!" ~Candy

King K. Rool

 * "YOU. . . . LUNKHEAD. . . . .NINNY. . . . . NEWT!! YOU JUST TOSSED THE COCONUT!!"
 * "I'm surrounded by fools!"
 * "No way! You chose the last contest, so I get to choose this one, and I choose the one where Donkey Kong gets beaten to a pulp!"
 * "Klump! Krusha! Back to the mine. By the time we get there I'll have thought of some way that I can blame all of this on you two home-spun idiots!"
 * "Cheater, cheater, banana bread eater!"
 * "Behold! My Doomsday... paper? Hmm... must be the instructions. 'Keep your paws off my treasure. Signed--' DONKEY KONG?!"
 * "HOW DARE YOU ENTER MY PRIVATE INNER SANCTUM WITHOUT AN INVITATION!"
 * "Krusha! The cart! After them!... Not without me, you stupid, thickheaded tadpole!!"
 * "Just give me your Monkey Business field report, you slimy-skinned bottomfeeder!!!!"
 * "Those clueless chimps may know their way around the island up there, but no one knows the underground like King K. Rool! Left, Krusha! (The mine cart crashes.) I meant, right!"
 * "The only enemies at a wedding, Klump, are the in-laws".
 * "The prize, the wish, Kongo Bongo Island is mine!"
 * "Very well, then. Da-da-da-da-da. There, I danced, I win, now GIMMIE GIMMIE GIMMIE!"
 * "They didn't invite me?! That's so unfair! What's wrong with me?! Haven't I always tried to be a good enemy to Donkey Kong??"
 * "NO, NO, NO! Now they've insulted me! I wouldn't go to that wedding if they begged me to go!"
 * "This had better be good, Klump. I was a toe away from getting into the de-scaling tub for a soak!"
 * "It's at times like this I find that I must ask myself again and again: 'Do I really want the Crystal Coconut this badly?'"
 * "WAKEY-WAKEY! I can see I have my work cut out for me..."
 * "'Fatso', is it? I'd choose my last words more carefully if I were you".
 * "The only moron present is you! Now shut your pie-hole and get your low IQ back to HQ ASAP, you M-O-R-O-N!"
 * "Oh, Krusha, you lunkhead. If you had two heads you'd be lonesome".
 * "Klump! Didn't I say no news, no calls, no tyranny until tomorrow!? It's a bad villain day!"
 * "Listen, you incompetent cretin! I want to be left alone! That means nothing! No one! No interruptions!"
 * "NO, you knucklehead! For some reason, Donkey Kong thinks he's a pirate, so he's pirating everything that's not glued down!"

Klump

 * "You call this a body?! I eat pretzels fatter than this!"
 * "Not you, I meant my twit!"
 * "Permission to close both eyes while I'm listenin', sir?"
 * "What the private means is that we were out of maneuvers. We got a little hungry for coconut cake... and I guess we got our coordinates missed!"
 * "Hey, robot-monkey! Bring me somethin' to eat! I'm waitin', soldier! Now step on it! HEY!"
 * "I know, I'll tell 'im a story. Oh, I got a good one. I'll tell 'im about my boot-camp days before bein' a General. My platoon was stationed in the swamps - it was the middle of July. I remember because the mosquitoes was bitin' somethin' fierce, and it was hotter than a pig on a spit. You could sauté seaweed on my tail, it was so hot. I remember my boot-stump like Mama's cookin'".
 * "Who goes there? A furball? What're you doing in King K. Rool's kitchen? What's this jungle doing in King K. Rool's kitchen?"
 * "Try this: special miltary-issue night-vision goggles, so he can't hippo-natize you".
 * "Uh, permission to invite you as my date, your party-pooperness?"
 * "Well, I'll save ya a piece of weddin' cake, sir".
 * "Aw, do we have to go just yet? I was hopin' to catch the bouquet!"
 * "Oh, I just love dreams! I had one the other night where a big pickle monster was dukin' it out with Mr. T. It was scrumdiddlyupmptious!"
 * (stares at Dixie) "Hey! Quit Spyin' on Me!"
 * (Begins to March) "Company! Forward! March! *snare drums play* Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup!"
 * "Yes Sir! Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup! Hip! Hup!"
 * "I said "Company Halt!" That's You! Krusha!"
 * "Kritters! Ready.....Aim.....FIRE!!!"
 * "Hip! Hup! hip! hup! Hip! hup! Company HALT!!!! Krusha? KRUSHA!!!"
 * "You said "Blast off" and I didn't get to say anything!"
 * "Mail call!!!!"
 * "Uh, a letter, your paint-by-numberness. It appears to be in some kind of milarty code, sir! (King K. Rool flips the letter over) Amazing. You deciphered it, sir! *clears throat* Dear King K. Rool, It's been a long time, since our days of whitewater polo, and tsunami wrestling, but I think back on those times fondly... (King K. Rool grabs the letter) ...I'd like to get together again, for old times sake. What do you say? Your old buddy....Cranky?!"
 * "A4 will go to the left, and A5 will..."
 * "King K. Rool!! Your Royal Roughness, Supreme Scaliness!"
 * "Oh we'll cheer him up, El Pretno! Sir! General Klump reporting! I have some news, and it's in my A1 rank of importance, sir!"
 * "Oh, huh. But sir...I think this news will really cheer you up!"
 * "My mom always told me to wear my helmet!"

Krusha

 * "Duhhh... is it Tuesday today?"
 * "Duh, I was in Dreamyland..."
 * "He's in a baaad mood".
 * "♪The wheels on the mine cart go round and round, round...♪ Hey. What happened to Uncle Swampy?"
 * "Uncle Swampy always says bye-bye".

Dialogue

 * Klump: Hip hup, hip hup, hippityyyy HUPP! Krusha? KRUUUUUUUUUUUSHA? Krusha: (From a distance) KLUUUUUUUUMP? Klump: Oh KRUUUUUUUUSHA? K. Rool: Klump? Where's the Magic Amulet? Haven't you found Donkey Kong yet? Klump: Uh, almost, sir! K. Rool: ALMOST? AS IN, "I'M ALMOST READY TO BARBEQUE YOUR SORRY CARCASS"?!? Klump: Uh, no.... Somewhere as in, somewhere between Not really, and sorta kinda... K.Rool: Don't tell me you're lost! Klump: Oh negative sir, my keen sense of sight, smell and direction have yet to fail me.... Hip hup, hip Hup (Marches off, than comes back) Hip hup...... Hip hup, whatcha got? K. Rool: A general whose brain can't hold a thought!
 * Cranky: DK, back to the cabin PRONTO! Donkey Kong: But we haven't found the Well of Woe yet.... Cranky: There is no Well of Woe you knucklehead, I made it up to teach you two goons a lesson! DK and Diddy: A practical joke? Donkey Kong: You mean, the Amulet isn't even evil? Cranky: IT'S JUNK!!!!
 * Cranky: To the Forbidden Forest! Hurry! Donkey Kong: (quickly) No can do! Diddy Kong: Oh, not again... Cranky: What are you talking about? Diddy: When DK was a kid, he thinks he saw a Bog Monster.... Donkey Kong: I DIDN'T THINK! I SAW! Cranky: Theres no such thing as Bog Monsters.... Donkey Kong: Oh yeah? Tell that to the one I saw! Cranky: THAT WAS ME THAT DAY, YA BIG GOOF!
 * K. Rool: (after firing Klump) Well now, General, what do you think of your new position? Krusha: But, uh, I ain't moved.
 * Bluster: Hey, Candy. Surprise! Candy: A birthday cake. How original, Bluster. Bluster: Yes, I am a thoughtful son-of-a-gun. Happy birthday! Banana cream, your favorite! Candy: Rejected; I'm watching my figure. Bluster: Don't bother, I'm watching it for you.
 * K. Rool: [Krusha is] a natural... disaster, that is! Klump: Deploy the tranquilizer dart, sir? K. Rool: No! Kill it! Klump: Uh, does he get any last words? K. Rool: The music, you militant mushhead!!
 * K. Rool: Once again, I, King K. Rool, have done the impossible. What do you think, Klump? Klump: (does jumping jacks) Doododododododododododooooo! K. Rool: I wish you wouldn't do that!
 * K. Rool: (after winning the dance contest) Now let me see, what do I want? To be ruler of all of Kongo Bongo Island? That sounds good... Cranky: It's not your fault, Donkey Kong. Klump: (celebrates with his jumping jacks) Doododododododododododooooo! K. Rool: I WISH YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT! Cranky: Hahahahaha! Looks like you got your one wish, K. Rool!
 * (DK and Dixie are sitting in the woods when Krusha comes up behind them.) Krusha: (in DK's voice) Hey, what about you, Dixie? Little Dixie Doodles. You are fine. Dixie: Huh? What is up with you, DK? DK: What? I didn't say anything! Krusha: C'mon! Put a lip lock on me, Dixie! That chump chimp Diddy will never know! Dixie: Why you lousy double crossin' two timin'... wait till Diddy gets a load of this!!!
 * Bluster: Do I get any last requests? K. Rool: OK, but it can't be too expensive! Bluster: Nonono! I simply wish to sing a song! (starts singing "100 Banana Bunches on the Wall" with Krusha and some Kritters)
 * K. Rool: Left turn, Krusha! We're heading back to the base for a brainstorming session! Krusha: Left? K. Rool: Right! Krusha: Right. K. Rool: No! I mean-- (Krusha turns right and the minecart crashes around the corner) Lunkhead!
 * K. Rool: Tell them the plan, Klump! Klump: A4 will go to the left, and A5 will... K. Rool: Keep it simple, Klump! Klump: We're going to Cranky's house to steal the Crystal Coconut! Any questions!?
 * K. Rool: I'll go on national television! Klump: ...On the 'Sing Along with Uncle Swampy' show?
 * Klump: Good. I won't have to say 'fire'. (The Kritters fire their Klap-Blasters.) What the-? Stop, you moronic, robotic lizards!! STOOOOOOOPPPPPP!!!!!!!! Kritter 1: "Stop"? Did he say "stop"? Kritter 2: I thought he said "fire"! Klump: When I said "fire", I didn't mean fire! (The Kritters fire again.) Oh, I give up. What's the use? Soon King K. Rool will have his barrel supersonic satellite, and I'll be nothin' but a rest-home reptile. Diddy: What's going on up there? DK: I don't know. But there's Kritters and Klaptraps. That means King K. Rool's not far behind. (After two Klaptraps ate Bluster's Banana Flip.) Klaptrap 1: You know what I hate about hair? Klaptrap 2: You eat a head full and half an hour later, you're hungry again. Bluster: MY BANANA FLIP!!
 * Cranky: Well, you did get the Trigger Barrels. But, I only needed two, not 2,000! DK: That reminds me. Bluster told me to give you this. (DK gives the receipt to Cranky, causing his eyes to widen in shock.) DK: He says it's due in 30 days. Cranky: DONKEY KOOOOOOOOOONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 * DK: Little buddy? Diddy: I'm way ahead of you, DK! Cranky: DONKEY KOOOOOOOOOONG!!!
 * Cranky: I'm sure that Bluster was up to some monkey business with the crystal, but what? DK: Why don't you just ask it? Cranky: Good idea, Donkey Kong. Did that blowhard Bluster ask you for something? Heart, flowers, bees... A love potion! DK and Diddy: A love potion? DK: What would Bluster want with a... Love potion?! BLUUUSTERRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 * (K. Rool is playing a video game on his computer.) Krusha: Only 500 more points to beat your record, your croc-ship. K. Rool: Come on, come on, come on!!! (Klump appears on the computer, erasing the game.) Klump: General Klump, King K. Rool sir! Y'read me, you’re high 'n mightyness? ...Looking a little pale there, chief! K. Rool: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (K. Rool smashes the computer and takes deep breaths. Klump calls on the cell phone.) Klump: Chief? You there, chief? Krusha: For you, your highness. Klump: Seems we had some sort of interference.
 * Green Kroc: If we dig any deeper, we'll sink the island! Kutlass: Aye! Are you sure we buried that treasure here, Captain-a-Skurvy, sir? Skurvy: Aye! X marks the spot! It be buried here, positively! Why, I'd even stake my reputation as the scurviest sea dog on it. I'd--ah, but even so, y'might wants to take a look over thar.
 * Green Kroc: Why does we bury the treasure, Captain? Skurvy: Why does we bury the treasure? WHY DOES WE BURY THE TREASURE?! Kutlass! Tell Mr. Green Kroc here why we be buryin' treasure! Kutlass: Ahem. According to Section D, Paragraph 4 of The Pirate-a Handbook-a, any and all-a treasure acquired by ill-gotten means shall and will be systematically buried... sir. Skurvy: So there be your answer, Mr. Green Kroc-Smarty Boots! Now, not another word. Green Kroc: But, if we just gonna be digging it up again... Skurvy: ARE YOUR EARS FULL OF COTTON, SAILOR!?!
 * DK: Y'see, I got bumped on the head, and now, um, who am I? Kutlass: You're Donkey... (Skurvy interrupts him with an elbow blow to the gut) Skurvy: ...KROC! DK: Huh? Skurvy: Aye! Donkey Kroc! Me old first mate! Green Kroc: But, I'm-a-your first-- (Skurvy elbows him in the gut, too) Skurvy: Surely you must remember Mr. Green Kroc, and me second mate, Kutlass.
 * Skurvy: And now that I have retrieved the Crystal Coconut, I shall rule the Six Seas! Polly Roger: Bhawk! Last I counted there was seven. Skurvy: Even better!
 * Skurvy: Now what be we doin', lads? Kutlass: Section D, Paragraph 4, Captain-a-Skurvy, sir! Green Kroc: Gift-wrap it?
 * Green Kroc: Maybe we should get [DK] to dig up the holes before we get rid of him? Skurvy: Aye, but I can't stands having any more of that monkey stuff on my ship. Kutlass: Easy for you to say! You just hold the map; you don't have to dig! Skurvy: "What be that, third mate?!"
 * K. Rool: So that's the reason Donkey Kong took my throne! Klump: He, uh, wanted a seat?
 * K. Rool: Krusha! Abort the mission and come back to headquarters immediatly! Krusha: I can't..... K. Rool: WHY NOT??!! Krusha: Something bad happened... K. Rool:(Groans angrily) Then find Klump and tell him to get his leathery hide back here immediatly! Krusha: Kluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuump!!! (The camera reveals that Klump is right next to Krusha) Klump: Ya don't have to shout! K. Rool: Klump? Klump: HAHAA! Heh. Oh, hello there, sir.  Everything um... under control here. (K. Rool shuts off his monitor) K. Rool: One more of my villain tutorials lesson 109 states: "If all else fails, implement and execute famous diabolical plan... Yourself!"
 * Skurvy: OK, you lard-backed landlubber, hand over the amulet! K. Rool: Oh no, it's a nasty old pirate! OK, you win. (hands Skurvy the amulet in exchange for the Coconut) Skurvy: Arr, I be wantin' all the booty - the Crystal Coconut, too! Give it over! K. Rool: I would, but your hands are full. Allow me to relieve you of the hand cannon. Skurvy: "Oh, why, thank ye, mate. (K. Rool takes the cannon and points it at Skurvy.) K. Rool: All right, you uneducated piece of vermin! Skurvy: Arrrr! That be a dirty trick!
 * Skurvy: So, you hand over the cannon, and I give you the amulet? K. Rool: NO! Keep the cannon; I only want the Crystal Coconut! Skurvy: But who gets the amulet? K. Rool: WHO CARES, YOU IMBECILE!?
 * DK: Boy, it sure is nice having the Crystal Coconut back. Cranky: You can say that again! DK: Boy, it sure is nice having...
 * Cranky: Well, that's a relief. Back where it belongs. DK: You know, Cranky, maybe you better find a safer place for the Coconut. Cranky: Nah, as long as I carry a big stick, no one will mess with me! (Eddie the Mean Old Yeti barges in.) Diddy: Unless it's someone with an even bigger stick! Eddie: Me, Eddie! DK, Diddy and Cranky: THE MEAN OLD YETI!!!
 * Candy: Okay, Donkey Kong, you've got your peace and quiet. Now what? DK: I wrote a song for you, Candy. (starts singing) ♪100 banana bunches on the wall! 100 banana bunches! If one of the bunches should happen to bruise, 99 banana bunches on the wall!♪ Candy: You wrote that for me? DK: Yep! 'Cause you're prettier than a barrel full of bananas, Candy! And there's more, a lot more!
 * Klump: Thunderin' artillery! Did you hear that? Krusha: Uh, hear what? Klump: "Will you marry me?"! Krusha: Me? Klump: No, ya noncommissioned nincompoop! Donkey Kong! Krusha: You want to marry Donkey Kong? Klump: No! Donkey Kong's gettin' married! We gotta tell King K. Rool immediately! (Soon, at the hideout...) K. Rool: Who did you say was getting married? Krusha: Me and Klump. Klump: Never mind him, sir.
 * Klump: Shall I requisition an exploding wedding cake, sir? Or booby-trap the bouquets? Or obliterate the hors d'evoures? K. Rool: You're not exactly a romantic, are you, Klump? Klump: Negatory on that, sir.
 * Klump: Permission to ask why you care about the enemy's forthcoming marriage, your sentimental slobbiness? K. Rool: Because who's more important than the king? Krusha: Uh, you are?
 * K. Rool: Now that I have the Crystal Coconut in my possession, maybe it's time I thought about settling down with a wife! Klump: Sorry, sir, but I can't volunteer for that mission! Thank you for askin', though.
 * Diddy: Gee, DK, you're the bravest ape in Kongo Bongo. You're not afraid of getting married, are you? DK: Don't be silly. It's just that the future ruler of Kongo Bongo isn't allowed to get married. Yep, that's it - the Crystal Coconut forbids it! Diddy: Really? I never knew that. DK: Neither did I until just now. How's it sound?
 * DK: Hey, Bluster? This is devastating! We're done for, doomed! Yet you look... Bluster: Curious? Yes, as to what that crab is doing on King K. Rool's back. K. Rool: You think someone with my educational background is going to fall for such a desperate, infantile trick as the old 'crab-on-the-back' routine? (Crabby bites him.) Huh? YEEEEOOOOOWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
 * K. Rool: Think of the possibilities, Klump. Do you realize the things I could do with the Crystal Coconut in one hand and the Golden Banana in the other? Klump: Um... eh, juggle?
 * K. Rool: So any further along with your "clever plan", Klump? Klump: Makin' headway, King K. Rool, sir. So far, we've managed to decode "assault", "like lightning", "night raid", "no prisoners", and "running shoe". K. Rool: Running shoe?! Klump: "Well, it might be "rooster", but it would change everything we've got so far.
 * K. Rool: Even brain-challenged bozos like you must have noticed that time has stopped. Klump: Well, that's a relief, sir. I thought my watch was broken. Krusha: Ooh, does this mean I can stay up late?
 * K. Rool: Where is my Coconut?! Klump: The big monkey wouldn't release it, sir. Krusha: And we said "please"!
 * Diddy: It's a 'Dear John' letter! DK: Ah, thank you. For a second there I thought this was meant for me.
 * DK: BANANA-SLAMMA! K. Rool: What an odd thing to say when somebody's chasing you.
 * K. Rool: HOLD IT! Klump: Yessir! (stops cart and K. Rool falls out) K. Rool: Ow ow ow! AAAHHH!!! What just happened?! WHY DID WE GIVE UP THE COCONUT??!! Krusha: Uh, we had a coconut?
 * K. Rool: Klump! Get back there and find out everything you can about, eh, whatsisname! Klump: Yes sir! Right away, sir! Uh, what is his name?
 * Cranky: Business? You've got no business to go into business! You'll lose your shirt! DK: That's OK. I don't wear a shirt. Cranky: Then you'll lose your tie.
 * K. Rool: Behold! The plans for my latest Donkey Kong Doomsday machine! I call it: the KCCBM! Klump: Kccbm? I think you need to recruit more vowels.
 * K. Rool: (slurps a Coconut Chill) Mmm, delicious. Klump: They say it's nice to share. K. Rool: I'll be sharing my foot with your tail if you don't get me more of these delicious treats! Klump: Affirmative, ya ol' greedy guts.
 * Bluster: The bigger you think, the bigger big shot you are, and the more you impress Candy! DK: Candy? Why didn't you say so? I'm all ears! Diddy: And I'm in for 50%.
 * Kutlass: Stop, you little half-a-wit sea dog! Diddy: Halfwit? You two are the ones missing the boat! (Kutlass and Green Kroc realize that Skurvy left without them as they shout out to him.) What a bunch of goofus doofuses! (Laughs.)
 * Cranky: You're supposed to be at my place keeping an eye on the Crystal Coconut! DK: Don't worry, Cranky, I took it for safe keeping. It's right over... Uh oh! It was right here a minute ago! Cranky: Safe keeping, eh?
 * K. Rool: With my KCCBM, we'll be up to our tails in Coconut Chills before you can say "Blast off"! (Klump pushes a big red button that launches the KCCBM.) Kritters: HOORAY!! K. Rool: I wanted to push the big red button! Klump: But you said 'blast off', and I didn't get to say anything!
 * Diddy: That's no ordinary map. Look! Footprints leading to an "X"! DK: So who would want to go clear across the island for an "X"? Funky: Especially when all you can spell with is like, uh, "xylophone"! DK: Or "exit"! Funky: Or "ox"! Diddy: Or TREASURE! DK: There's no "X" in "treasure", Diddy. Diddy: D'OH, I KNOW THAT! I'm saying this is a treasure map! "X" marks the spot!
 * Candy: Hey, where's DK going? Bluster: Candy, uh... forget that. You didn't see them. You're hallucinating! You just think DK's going on a treasure hunt... uh, can I rephrase that? Candy: HE'S STANDING ME UP TO GO ON A TREASURE HUNT?! Why of all the... Dixie: Candy! Trea-sure hunt. As in treasure. Huh? Candy: Treasure? He's going on a treasure hunt? Bluster: Now Candy. As foreman of the... Candy: Are you flying this thing or am I learning to fly it without you!?
 * Klump: Seems the apes are performing some search-and-rescue operation in the mountain mines, sir! K. Rool: What could they possibly be looking for in the mountain mines? Krusha: Duh, rocks? K. Rool: Rocks? Of course! LIKE THE KIND IN YOUR HEAD! What's the target, Klump? Klump: Buried treasure, sir! K. Rool: Any idea what kind of treasure? Klump: Rocks?
 * K. Rool: It's so obvious that the treasure they're looking for is some kind of Doomsday Device capable of destroying an entire island! Do you know what that means? Krusha: Duh, the apes will have supreme domination over Kongo Bongo Island and probably turn us into matching luggage. K. Rool: He does have his moments.
 * Funky: Whoa! Maybe the kids have doom-swooped the island! Bluster: What will we do? Funky: Only thing we can do. Chill here and wait for the others to give us the 'All Clear' sign. Bluster: But that could take a long time! Funky: So, we get to know each other. I'll tell you my middle name if you, like, tell me yours. Bluster: LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!
 * Cranky: Now zip your lip and listen! I've got something that'll snap Eddie the Mean Old Yeti out of his mean old mood! DK: Eddie's not the only one who could use some of that. Cranky: I heard that!
 * Cranky: I think I just spotted Eddie! Funky: I am ready, dude! Cranky: Not ready! Eddie! Funky: Not ready yet? Just say when! Cranky: Isn't there something you can do so we can communicate? (Funky does something on the control panel and the noise stops.) Funky: All right. So, let's communicate. Cranky: What did you do? Funky: Turn the engine off. Cranky: Then what's holding us up? Funky: Like... (the plane starts to fall) ...nothing.
 * Eddie: Me cranky! Cranky: No, I'm Cranky! Funky: Welcome to the club, cranky dudes! I'm cranky too! Eddie: Me crankiest! Cranky + Funky: AND HE'S GOT THE CLUB!!
 * Cranky: Stop moving ya moron! I'm taking an X-ray of the inside of your head. Funky: Cool! I'll take an 8x7 and 3 wallet size! Cranky: The brain's already wallet size.
 * Bluster: I am a remarkable specimen! Sound mind with the body of a Greek god! Diddy: Yeah - Blimpo, god of the fatheads.
 * Cranky: [Bluster] thought we were talking about him and not the X-Ray machine, and now he's trying to weasel his way into the history book by killing all of us with his good deeds. Fat chance. Diddy: How do we make him stop? Cranky: With the cherry soda! Right there on the shelf, next to the Super-Sonic Vitapunch pack. DK: Cherry soda? Cranky: He thinks he has a fatal disease? DK: Yeah. Cranky: All we have to do is convince him that this cherry soda is some new miracle drug that will cure him. Diddy: Cherry soda's a miracle drug? Cranky: Of course not! But he'll think so and stop trying to destroy Kongo Bongo by being a hero. Besides, I've been trying to unload that stuff for ages.
 * Bluster: The BarrelCopter! Mummy'll be livid! Cranky: Tell her to take a number - I was livid first! Candy: What about me? Bluster: What about you? Candy: I'm livid! Cranky: You can be livid later; now get this thing out of my house!
 * Klump: Ooh ooh, I could use my secret emergency code. Like: "The fog was thick and dense." K. Rool: Like your brain.
 * K. Rool: I know exactly how to keep Donkey Kong running in circles until the proverbial cows come home. Krusha! Krusha: (enters behind K. Rool) When did the cows leave? K. Rool: How many times have I told you not to sneak up behind me like that?!
 * Inka Dinka Doo: Donkey... share... everyone. Diddy: No kidding! Tell DK and it'll be all over Kongo Bongo before you can say "Spill the Beans"! DK: What do you mean? I can keep a secret! Diddy: Yeah, right. Like the time I told you about my rash? And the time Cranky told you about his rash? And the time Candy told you about her... DK: Allrightallrightallright! I get the picture!
 * Cranky: "Who built the ancient and mysterious temple of Inka-Dinka Doo?" Now why do you knuckleheads suppose it's called mysterious? DK: We don't know? Cranky: Exactly! It's a mystery! No one knows who built it! The end!
 * DK: It's an invasion! DK + Diddy: They're gonna zomibify us! Cranky: I'll smackify the both of ya unless you knock off the Science-Fictional nonsense.
 * Diddy: This is weird! DK: Yeah! I didn't know Funky was opening a hair salon.
 * DK: Do your zombie worst! No interplanetary visitor dude mind vibe can control my mind! Cranky: No kidding! They'll never be able to find it!
 * Funky: I got that zombie stuff from a movie I saw on the late, late, late, late show! Candy: You see? There's no such thing as interplanetary visitor dudes! Funky: Not ones that turn people into zombies, anyway. The ones I've met have always been real mellow... in an alternate life-form kind of way.
 * Diddy: Then we'll kick some interplanetary butt! That is if they have butts. Klump: They might have two. Or three.
 * K. Rool: You lost the Crystal Coconut?! Polly Roger: Yeah, so sue me! If I had a little more ground support I might have kept it! K. Rool: KLUMP! You had orders to provide ground support! What's your excuse? Klump: Tactical error. I lost 'em. Polly Roger: The tactical error was giving you the job!
 * K. Rool: That's it! Cut Donkey Kong's hair, and before it grows back, I'll have the coconut! Klump: But uh... who will, uh... cut his hair? K. Rool: It's so obvious- the only person he'll let get close enough to him. You wouldn't know a good plan if it hit you in the head! Klump: I would too. If it hit me in the head.
 * Bluster: I'm tired, my feet are sore, I have sand in my shoes and I'm thirsty! Give me that bottle! Candy: No, this will save Donkey Kong! Bluster: So what if K. Rool wins? Who cares? Donkey Kong will be out of my hair; I can't stand that guy! Now gimme that stuff!
 * Candy: Leonardo Di-Ape-rio is the most adorable, talented, dreamy movie star I've ever drilled over! DK: What's he got that I don't have? Diddy: Well, movie-star good looks, movie-star fame, movie star money... DK: I've been in lots of movies. Candy: Huh? DK: Every Saturday afternoon I sit right in the front row.
 * DK: Hey, Bluster, what are ya doing? Diddy: Lemme guess; Funky glued your fingers together?
 * DK: Maybe we could fool K. Rool into thinking you could still hypnotize them! Bluster: I could do that. Or I could just use the last of the serum and really hypnotize them! DK: That would work too! (pats Bluster, causing him to drop the beaker) Oops! Bluster: At least it would have, if you weren't such a clumsy clutz!
 * Diddy: Jumpin' jungleants! What did you say? DK: It's the anniversary of the first time I broke a date with Candy. So I'm gonna write her a love letter using Funky's plane! Diddy: Yoohoo! Anybody home? Who celebrates that anniversary? It's like celebrating your first toothache!
 * Klump: Sir, there's an intruder on the island; some fella who's conspirin' with the enemy, AKA the apes. K. Rool: How so, Klump, AKA Twit?
 * K. Rool: Well Krusha, let's hear it! Krusha: Uh-huh, what? K. Rool: Your imitation! Krusha: Uh, all right. Here goes. (imitates K. Rool's voice) Lunkhead! Once I have the Coconut... K. Rool: Not me, you ninny! Donkey Kong's! Krusha: Ooh, sorry. I thought you meant you, your mightiness. K. Rool: Just do his voice! Krusha: (imitates DK's voice) Bananas, bananas, bananas. I always got bananas on the brain.
 * Klump: When the coast is clear, we'll jump out of the barrels, steal the Crystal Coconut back, and then swim back to shore. Krusha: Duh, I can't swim... Klump: Well, why didn't ya say so before we snuck on board!? Krusha: Well, you never asked.
 * Krusha: I've devised a new plan to let me do the following: One, take over the world; Two, get rid of those babbling baboons; Three, get the Coconut. Klump: And rescue K. Rool from being blown to tiny bits? Krusha: (sighs) And rescue K. Rool from being blown to tiny bits!
 * Klump: Hey, Fred Astairicle! I'm leadin'! Krusha: Why you? Klump: Because I outrank ya.
 * Klump: With Donkey Kong incommissioned, grabbin' the Coconut will be a piece of cake. Krusha: Ooh ooh ooh, we get cake too? Klump: Aw, nevermind...
 * Bluster: [after voting for himself] May I have another? Cranky: Sorry, Bluster, one vote each! That's how it works. Bluster: You mean, I get the same number of votes as him!? (points to Eddie the Yeti) And you call this a democracy!
 * DK: Well? Klump: Well... Job well done, sir. DK: Not so shabby yourself, Klump. Now, if I ever see you in my territory again, I'm gonna "BANANA SLAMMA!!!" you like you've never been Banana Slamma'ed before. Klump: In triplicate, varmint! (DK and Klump salute each other, turn around, and walk away)

title: Donkey Kong Country


text: User:Boffy b

title: User:Boffy b


text:
Nikolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky

Nikolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky (Никола́й Ива́нович Лобаче́вский) (December 1, 1792 – February 24, 1856, N.S.; November 20, 1792 – February 12, 1856, O.S.) was a Russian mathematician.

Quotes

 * There is no branch of mathematics, however abstract, which may not some day be applied to phenomena of the real world.
 * As quoted in George Edward Martin, The Foundations of Geometry and the Non-Euclidean Plane, Springer (1998 [1975]), p. 225; also in Stanley Gudder, A Mathematical Journey, McGraw-Hill (1976), p. 36.

 * You must not attempt this approach to parallels. I know this way to its very end. I have traversed this bottomless night, which extinguished all light and joy from my life. I entreat you, leave the science of parallels alone…I thought I would sacrifice myself for the sake of the truth. I was ready to become a martyr who would remove the flaw from geometry and return it purified to mankind. I accomplished monstrous, enormous labours; my creations are far better than those of others and yet I have not achieved complete satisfaction. For here it is true that si paullum a summo discessit, vergit ad imum. I turned back when I saw that no man can reach the bottom of this night. I turned back unconsoled, pitying myself and all mankind… I have travelled past all reefs of this infernal Dead Sea and have always come back with broken mast and torn sail. The ruin of my disposition and my fall date back to this time. I thoughtlessly risked my life and happiness — aut Caesar aut nihil. ["Emperor or nothing"]
 * Letter from his father, on April 4, 1820.
 * My dear Father! Now I cannot say anything else; from nothing I have created a new different world. All other things that I have sent to you are just a house of cards compared to a tower. I am determined to publish a work on parallels as soon as having arranged and prepared it.
 * Letter to his father, 1823

Quotes about him

 * Lobachevski had to teach Geometry; and began by an intensive critical study of Euclid, acting as devil's advocate. This approach to the anomalous parallel axiom resulted in his non-Euclidean Geometry.
 * John Littlewood, Littlewood's Miscellany, p. 193.

title: Nikolai Ivanovich Lobachevsky


text: User:Ngb

title: User:Ngb


text:
User:MarkLucas

Okay, I'll be the first to admit it: I'm a boring person. I'm 15, from Michigan, and have no life outside of the computer. I do come up with quotes every now and then, but that's not too often, because most of the time my original ideas were once someone else's. But that's there, not here. If you want to know anything about me, just ask.

Quotes: - I hate trying to come up with original ideas, as most of them were once somebody else's. - Sometimes I wonder if my life is just part of somebody else's dream, I also wonder if he enjoys it. - God, are you going to fire me? Or am I going to have to quit? - In the beginning, there was nothing. It's been all downhill since. - Can't you hear the sarcasm in my typing? - You might be a redneck if your grandfather was mistaken for bigfoot. - For all practical purposes, I have disappeared from the face of the Earth.

title: User:MarkLucas


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User talk:Deir Yassin

Hi, welcome to English Wikiquote and its local embassy! I hope you enjoy English Wikiquote. Here are some useful links: Again welcome! ;-) --Aphaia 01:27, 1 May 2005 (UTC)
 * Village pump for communication
 * Admin's noticeboard for communication related to admin issues,
 * Browse for browsing Wikiquote

title: User talk:Deir Yassin


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Talk:Criss Cross (1949 film)

Every word of the quotes here comes from the IMDb article. --RPickman 02:32, 1 May 2005 (UTC)

title: Talk:Criss Cross (1949 film)


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Paul Bettany

Paul Bettany (born May 27, 1971) is an English actor.

Quotes

 * If a director wants to give me a job, I sometimes ask them to screen-test me. Then they can't sort of blame me if they're not getting what they wanted later on. It's like, "You fucking hired me; you saw what you were getting."
 * Interview

 * Because it doesn't happen like this, where we're having an interview and it sort of turns into a conversation--and a quite gratifying one, because it's all about me.
 * Interview

 * A lot of nonsense is spoken about morality. The world is full of people who have had affairs and most marriages, if you look at the statistics, break down, and does that make people evil? It's they've made bad decisions. It diminishes the situation to say someone is 'morally bankrupt' because they've had an affair.
 * Article

 * "You say 'ore´gano', we say 'orega´no'. You say 'tom a to' we say 'toma´to'. You say '[]erb' and we say herb because there's a fucking h at the beginning.
 * Comparing British and American English on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, 16 September 2004

title: Paul Bettany


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User:Postdlf

Please see my Wikipedia user page.

title: User:Postdlf


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User talk:Postdlf

Please leave a message on my Wikipedia talk page.

title: User talk:Postdlf


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Talk:Constitution of 3 May 1791

Quotations
The information on the circumstances of the comments (when and where they were made) is useful to the reader, and should be retained.

Jefferson made his comment as work was still underway on the U.S. Constitution. It is chronologically the first of the quotations, and should appear first. Likewise, Burke should be third; and Kołłątaj and Potocki, last in the "contemporary" series.

Logologist 10:53, 1 May 2005 (UTC)

title: Talk:Constitution of 3 May 1791


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User talk:Logologist~enwikiquote

And thank you for your contribution. You would like to read our Manual of style probably. Your current style is a bit different one, so someone including you will modify it.

Again, welcome! --Aphaia 12:00, 1 May 2005 (UTC)

Boleslaw Prus
Hi, Logologist, thank you for your new submission, Boleslaw Prus. By the way we sort every article into categories: literary warks, TV shows, films and so on. Would you like to let us what kind of work your "Boleslaw Prus" is? Like other articles, it would be very helpful to have a brief one-line description what it is. Cheers, --Aphaia 11:56, 14 May 2005 (UTC)

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Logologist. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Logologist~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:29, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:52, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Logologist~enwikiquote


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Tommy Franks

Tommy Ray Franks (born June 17, 1945) is a retired General in the United States Army. He previously served as the Commander of the United States Central Command, overseeing United States Armed Forces operations in a 25-country region including the Middle East.

Quotes

 * We don't do body counts.
 * News conference at Bagram Air Base, Afghanistan (March, 2002) in reference to Afghan deaths due to invasion; quoted in Edward Epstein, "Success in Afghan war hard to gauge," The San Francisco Chronicle (2002-03-23).

American Soldier (2004)

 * To all who serve... and those who love them.
 * Dedication

 * Another hallway led to a green steel door. "This is the execution chamber," the officer said. "The day of the execution, we take the man through this door." He opened the green door, and we blinked at the bright lights inside. A big chair filled the room. I could smell leather. "All right, boys," he said. "Line up." The kids made a straight line that led out the green door, then moved ahead, one at a time, to sit in the big wooden chair. "This is the electric chair, Tommy Ray," my dad explained. "It's where murderers are executed." The boys inched forward. Some sat longer in the chair than others. Executed meant killed, that much I knew. "This is the ultimate consequence for the ultimate act of evil," my father told the troop. When all the boys had sat in the chair, it was my turn. I reached up and felt the smooth wood, the leather straps with cold metal buckles. There was a black steel cap dangling up there like a lamp without a bulb. "Up you go, Tommy Ray," Dad said, hoisting me into the chair. The boys were staring at me. But I wasn't even a little bit afraid. My father stood right beside me. I could feel his warm hand next to the cool metal buckle. As the school bus rumbled out of the prison parking lot that afternoon, I stared back at the high walls. I had learned another important lesson. A consequence was what followed what you did. If you did good things, you'd be rewarded with further good things. If you broke the law, you'd have to pay the price. I have never forgotten that lesson.
 * p. 8

 * When I was six, we moved to the small town of Stratford, about fifteen miles northeast of Wynnewood. My father had worked as a banker, a grain farmer, a fix-it man, and a mechanic. Now he was ready for a new line of work. When I was young, his restless streak seemed perfectly normal. A few years later, I realized that he was an optimistic dreamer, convinced that the next job or business would make us rich. And the fact is that my dad was good at everything he took on. Maybe too good. There wasn't a refrigerator, an outboard motor, a gas or diesel engine that he couldn't repair. If somebody drove over a backfiring John Deere Model 60 tractor to have Ray Franks "take a little look at the damn timing chain," my father would rebuild the engine. And if they'd shaken hands on a price of ten dollars for the job, he would not accept a nickel more, even if he'd spent fifteen dollars on spare parts.
 * p. 9

 * Bill Cohen had a will-earned reputation as a thoughtful, decisive Secretary of Defense. When the staff lit up the plasma screens and ran the tapes of the Bright Star exercise, showing how the friendly coalition "Greenland" had defeated the aggressors of "Orangeland", Cohen asked all the right questions. He seemed especially impressed that we had assembled the system using commercially available hardware. Our staff officers and sergeants were on their toes. They answered all the secretary's questions, and he left with a smile on his face. I was proud of the command post- and of the young men and women who had made it such a success.
 * p. 185

 * Sitting back in the hard plastic chair on the hotel roof, I reflected on that talk I'd given to the CENTCOM intelligence staff the previous Friday. America was in deep shock, reeling from the images of airliners smashing into buildings and those proud towers collapsing like flaming tinsel. Would my fellow citizens now be persuaded to abandon their hard-won individual freedoms to earn a bit more security in a clearly insecure world? As I stood up, another thought struck me. Today is like Pearl Harbor. The world was one way before today, and will never be that way again. We stand at a crease in history.
 * p. 246

 * Later that evening, with exhaustion setting in and nothing left to do but wait for clearance to fly, Cathy and I took the aircrew to dinner; the members of our traveling staff stayed behind, chained to their phones and computers. We walked through the quiet waterfront to the lamp-lit, sandstone-block courtyard of the Mylos Taverna. As we filed to our corner table, the normally-effusive chatter of the Greek patrons dropped to a whisper. I scanned the nearby tables; faces everywhere were drawn with sadness. Yiannis, our usually-smiling waiter, approached silently and shook my hand as if at a funeral. "Everyone is so sorry, General," the man said.
 * p. 246

 * As the night passed, Rifle updated me on the readiness of our forces, the locations of our aircraft carrier battle groups, and the "Global power" timelines for missions by B-2 stealth bombers flying from Whiteman Air Force Base in Missouri. I had received an intelligence alert that as many as thirty additional terrorist strikes were possible worldwide. But there had been no more attacks... so far. Maybe this was because we'd buttoned up, sealing our vulnerabilities by going to Threat Con Delta. By now, CNN was running tape of President Bush flying back to Andrews and landing in Marine One on the White House lawn. The immediate crisis was over: the President was back in the Oval Office, the Secretary of Defense was in the wounded Pentagon. America was putting on her "game face". I was proud of my country.
 * p. 247

 * The family plots are close together in the sparse shade. My father, Ray. My mother, Lorene. Aunt Mildred and Uncle Bob, Docie, Betty, Johnny and Doris Jean. All of them there, all of them at rest. Seeing my father's grave, I smile, remembering something he told me when I was a teenager, conflicted over some long-forgotten crisis. "What do you think you should do about it, Tommy Ray?" He'd asked. "I dunno," I'd said. "It's all so confusing." He looked at me with a gentle smile. "Remember this, son. You don't necessarily need to know anything to have an opinion." Since that day, I've been what you might call opinionated, although as an adult, I like to believe I've earned the opinions I have.
 * p. 561

 * Colin Powell said recently that he was disappointed that some of the intelligence on Iraq's WMD program was "inaccurate and wrong and in some cases deliberately misleading." That, of course, is the nature of human intelligence. The issue is not whether the source of the intelligence information was telling the truth, but whether George Tenet, Colin Powell, and President George W. Bush believed that the information was true. I believe they did. I know I did. And I do not regret my role in disarming Iraq and removing the Baathist regime.
 * p. 562

Quotes about

 * General Tommy Franks, the man in charge of the initial invasion, bluntly told reporters, “We don’t do body counts.” One survey found that most Americans thought Iraqi deaths were in the tens of thousands. But our calculations, using the best information available, show a catastrophic estimate of 2.4 million Iraqi deaths since the 2003 invasion.
 * The Staggering Death Toll in Iraq, by Medea Benjamin & Nicolas J. S. Davies / AlterNet] (March 15, 2018)

title: Tommy Franks


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User talk:129.215.16.12

The pages you are creating appear to be vanity pages. You can create a User page where you can place quotations of your drinking buddies and such. The pages you have created do not appear to be of any widely noted people and I will label them for deletion. ~ Achilles 18:17, 1 May 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:129.215.16.12


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Wikiquote talk:Quote of the day/May 1, 2005

This is a misattribution. "Don't panic" was taken from Mr Jones the butcher in the BBC sitcom Dad's Army!

 * It is a simple statement, no doubt used by others even before either case, but now is far more famous as used by Douglas Adams as the phrase on the cover of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. ~ Kalki 23:15, 1 May 2005 (UTC)