text:
User talk:125.236.44.47

Please stop adding nonsense to Wikiquote. It is considered vandalism. If you want to experiment, please use the sandbox. Wikiquote exists for the collecting of notable quotations of famous people and famous works. For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote, and also What Wikiquote is not for a list of common activities that Wikiquote does not support. When people are not interested in responsibly contributing to the development of the project incidents of their deliberate vandalism can result in IP addresses being blocked from editing. Thank you.

Wikiquote exists for the collecting of notable quotations of famous people and famous works. When people are not interested in responsibly contributing to the development of the project incidents of their deliberate vandalism can result in IP addresses being blocked from editing. ~ Kalki 02:11, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Please stop. If you continue to vandalize pages, you will be blocked from editing Wikiquote.. Do not break the link. It will be other readers' convinience. --Aphaia 04:35, 27 February 2007 (UTC)

- InvisibleSun 04:26, 24 June 2008 (UTC)

vandalism
This is a school computer, I'm afraid, so many people share the same IP. I apologise for the inconveniences other students may have caused. 125.236.44.47 00:48, 23 July 2008 (UTC)

title: User talk:125.236.44.47


text:
The Idiot Weekly

The Idiot Weekly, a 1958-1962 radio comedy series by Australian Broadcasting Commission.

The All Australian Leather Rocket

 * Michael: Look at you. Filthy! Your uniform's covered in mud. What kind of a guard do you call yourself?
 * Eccles: I'm a mudguard.

The French Connection

 * Eccles: HELP!
 * Bobby: There's someone in the sea.
 * Eccles: Who?
 * Bobby: You.
 * Eccles: Help!
 * Bobby: What's the matter?
 * Eccles: The sea is full of water. And me!

 * Eccles: You've saved my life.
 * Bobby: Well, we all make mistakes.
 * Eccles: I know. I've seen your wife.

The Prime Minister's Trousers

 * Inspector: What was your last job?
 * Eccles: I was the head gamekeeper to Lord Chatterly.
 * Inspector: Did he give you a reference?
 * Eccles: No, but his wife did!

The First Australian into Outer Woy Woy

 * Michael: Please stop these insults or we'll get Mr Limb to tell one of his jokes.
 * Bobby: That's a good idea. There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a...
 * FX: Gunshot
 * Spike: ... dead Australian comic.

 * Minister: Mr Speaker, honourable members. This urgent telegram dated 1901 has just arrived from Canberra.
 * Eccles: Where's Canberra?
 * Minister: Somebody tell Mr Menzies where it is.

The Australian Flag

 * Michael: This story concerns the story of the Australian Secret Service who through their gallant efforts put three years on the war.

 * Announcer: So Lieutenant Eccles, Idiot and BAR, is unaware that a female German spy has tunneled up through the floorboard of the airship and is now in the main lounge. At the moment I am hanging on an ABC rope ladder under the floor. I will now thrust the microphone up so that you can hear the next scene.
 * Eccles: Ooowww! Mind what you do with that thing!

 * Announcer: Bobby Limb has volunteered to be parachuted into France, on the one condition that he gets more lines to say in the show.

 * Michael: Sergeant, arrest those old uniforms and have them reduced to the rank of underwear!

The Ashes

 * Lord Thud: My lords, I have news that is six feet deep.
 * Lord: That sounds like grave news.
 * Lord Thud: At 4.30 this afternoon as the crow files, on Lords cricket ground, Australia won the Ashes.
 * Omnes: Cries and groans.
 * Lord Thud: And worse still, there were women and children present!

The Spon Plague

 * Newsreader: ...three dead and fourteen grievously injured. That concludes the rugby results for New South Wales. And now here is the news of the Spon. The theory has been advanced that a possible cure for the disease is the rare sponberry which grows between 18 Macquarie Street and Africa.

 * Fish Rafferty: We stepped into a world of Eastern wonderment and in the middle of a great marble mosaic floor was a great tunnel.
 * Sheik: That is the other end of the Eastern Suburbs Railway.
 * Fish Rafferty: Where does it lead to?
 * Sheik: Ruin.

King's Cross - The East Berlin of Australia

 * Prime Minister of King's Cross: M for Mary, G for Gordon.
 * Premier of New South Wales: Mary Gordon. That's a funny name for a man.
 * Prime Minister: Not in King's Cross.

 * Prime Minister: We want to blow up Federal Parliament.
 * Nigel Fawkes: Right. Now the best time to blow it up is when they're all asleep.
 * Eccles: That's the daytime.

 * John: England, as usual, sent high ranking idiots to help Australia lose the war.

The Great Christmas Pudding

 * Announcer: Excuse me, Major. I'm from the ABC.
 * Major: I'm sorry, I don't have any money on me. See old Bob Dyer, he's got a fortune in his mattress.

The Last Tram to King Street Bridge

 * Michael: That afternoon, the Prime Minister read this urgent signal to Parliament.
 * Prime Minister: Gentlemen, British troopers have defeated Chips Rafferty at the Eureka Stockade.

The Flying Dustman of the Outback

 * Harry: At first nobody noticed it. Then one day, me and the missus had a letter from a friend.
 * Gladys: "Dear Harry and Gladys. No offence, but when the wind's in our direction we can't stand the smell of your dustbins."
 * Harry: I didn't think they smell much.
 * Gladys: They must do. This letter's from New Zealand.

 * Captain Eisdell, RAN: Pull up the mainsail, put all top missen sails out and the spinnaker sail aft.
 * Eccles: Won't it be difficult?
 * Eisdell: Why, damn you?
 * Eccles: It's a steam ship.

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: The Idiot Weekly


text:
User talk:24.255.2.71

Welcome to Wikiquote, the free compendium of quotations! You don't have to log in to read or edit articles on Wikiquote, but creating an account is quick, free and non-intrusive, requires you to provide no personal information, and gives you many benefits, including:
 * The use of a username of your choice
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Click here to create an account. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 07:26, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Specific sources
An editor using this IP address recently moved some quotes in Carl Sagan from the Unsourced section into specific book sections, which is greatly appreciated. Might I ask a favor — that this editor also add page numbers and book editions while they have the evidence of these sources handy? One of the sorely needed tasks for many Wikiquote articles is identification of specific sources, so that readers may find (and editors may verify) these quotes in the relevant books. (We need the edition information, easily provided by an ISBN in most cases, so extrapolations between different editions can be made.) Thanks for any assistance that can be provided. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 07:32, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:24.255.2.71


text:
User talk:24.181.67.89

Welcome to Wikiquote, the free compendium of quotations! You don't have to log in to read or edit articles on Wikiquote, but creating an account is quick, free and non-intrusive, requires you to provide no personal information, and gives you many benefits, including:
 * The use of a username of your choice
 * The ability to view all your contributions via a "My contributions" link
 * Your own user page
 * Your own talk page which, if you choose, also allows users to send you messages without knowing your e-mail address
 * The use of your own personal watchlist to which you can add articles that interest you
 * The ability to rename pages
 * The ability to customize the appearance and behavior of the website
 * The eligibility to become an administrator
 * The right to be heard in formal votes and elections, and on pages like votes for deletion

Click here to create an account. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 07:36, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Copying Wikipedia articles
An editor using this IP address recently created a film article, The Pebble and the Penguin, by copying its Wikipedia stub article to Wikiquote. Please do not do this. This editor also created the article An All Dogs Christmas Carol merely by adding a cast list and two Wikipedia image links which do not work here, suggesting it was originally intended for or added to Wikipedia.

Please note that Wikiquote is a collection of quotes, not an encyclopedia where this information is more appropriate. Some of these elements are indeed included in WQ film articles, but they are not useful articles unless they include quotes. More information on the format and content of Wikiquote film articles can be found at Templates, especially at Templates/Films. Thank you for your cooperation. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 07:51, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:24.181.67.89


text:
User talk:Woodylogan~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 07:58, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
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Copying Wikipedia articles
You recently created an article, Leo the Lion (MGM), by copying its Wikipedia article to Wikiquote. Please do not do this. Wikiquote is a collection of quotes, not an encyclopedia where this information is more appropriate. A brief (1-3 sentence) encyclopedic introduction is desirable to identify the subject, but the substance of WQ articles must be quotes. As the MGM lion does not speak in his many appearances, I'm afraid this would seem to be an unlikely subject for a quote article. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:03, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Woodylogan. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Woodylogan~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:38, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 06:01, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Woodylogan~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Sharmanto

Welcome
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title: User talk:Sharmanto


text:
User talk:TheM~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called TheM. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name TheM~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:36, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:59, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:TheM~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Abhage

Welcome
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title: User talk:Abhage


text:
User talk:Janosch~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Janosch. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Janosch~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:24, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:49, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Janosch~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Densus~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Densus. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Densus~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:21, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:46, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Densus~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Corellion~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Corellion. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Corellion~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:20, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:44, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Corellion~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Greek~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:13, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Greek. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Greek~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:24, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:48, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Greek~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Friendofworld

Welcome
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title: User talk:Friendofworld


text:
User talk:Highschooler35

Welcome
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title: User talk:Highschooler35


text:
User talk:Bri guy~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:13, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Bri guy. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Bri guy~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:19, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:43, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Bri guy~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Dbromage

Welcome
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title: User talk:Dbromage


text:
User talk:Mathilde~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Mathilde. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Mathilde~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:29, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:52, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Mathilde~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Francis~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Francis. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Francis~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:23, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:47, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Francis~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Joncolvin

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:13, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:Joncolvin


text:
User talk:Damodar pai

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:13, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
 * To ask for help or to talk with another editor, visit our Village pump.
 * To browse Wikiquote, take a look at our browsing start page.
 * To sign with a date, write four tildes (~~) and save.
 * Before creating new articles, consult our guide. You may practice how to edit a page at Sandbox.
 * Be bold.

title: User talk:Damodar pai


text:
Talk:Hassan Nasrallah

Times "martyrdom operations" quote
I have (at least temporarily) removed the Washington Times source for Nasrallah's "martyrdom operations" quote for two reasons: it does not specify where in the paper this quote appeared (news sources should include article titles and/or page numbers), and the relevant hit on the Times search engine suggest the source may actually be an op-ed piece, rather than a presumably related news article on 4 December 2002. Given the amount of indirection involved here, the potential for bias, and the controversy surrounding the quote, I feel it's necessary to pin down exactly where and how this quote appeared in the Times before citing it as a source. (I'll see if I can dig up the two Times pieces in the next week or so.) For now, I think we should rely on the secondary CAMERA source. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 08:47, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Broken reference
The reference of the following quote returns a 404!

I am against any reconciliation with Israel. I do not even recognize the presence of a state that is called "Israel." I consider its presence both unjust and unlawful.

* The Washington Post. February 2, 2000. Interview conducted by Antoine K. Kehdy of Middle East Insight magazine. * Source: Interview

84.227.53.76 21:20, 12 May 2008 (UTC)

Unsourced

 * Peace settlements will not change reality, which is that Israel is the enemy and that it will never be a neighbor or a nation.

 * The Palestinian National Charter will live on as long as there is a knife in a Palestinian woman's hand with which she stabs an Israeli soldier or settler ... as long as there are suicide bombers in Jerusalem and Tel Aviv ... and as long as there is a child who throws a stone in the face of an Israeli soldier.
 * Associated Press. December 12, 1998

 * "What do the people who worked in those two [World Trade Center] towers, along with thousands of employees, women and men, have to do with war that is taking place in the Middle East? Or the war that Mr. George Bush may wage on people in the Islamic world?" he asked me. "Therefore we condemned this act — and any similar act we condemn.

 * "It is unacceptable, it is forbidden, to harm the innocent," he told me, reflecting on Iraq. "To have Iraqis confronting the occupation army, this is natural. But if there are American tourists, or intellectuals, doctors, or professors who have nothing to do with this war, they are innocent, even though they are Americans, and it is forbidden. It is not acceptable to harm them."

title: Talk:Hassan Nasrallah


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User talk:211.28.122.184

Wikiquote exists for the collecting of notable quotations of famous people and famous works. When people are not interested in responsibly contributing to the development of the project incidents of their deliberate vandalism can result in IP addresses being blocked from editing. ~ Kalki 10:53, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:211.28.122.184


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James Woods

James Howard Woods (born April 18, 1947) is an Oscar-nominated American actor and producer.

Quotes

 * Susan Sarandon ruined the world when she had a kid when she was, like, fucking 96 years old. Now, every actress wants to wait to have a kid at 90. I said to Heather, “How do you know you’ll get the same attention from men when you’re that age?” She was like, “Oh, you just like me for my blonde hair, my blue eyes and my big tits?” There was too long a pause before I answered, “Well…” and she just stormed out.
 * On relationship with Heather Graham, who Woods dated when he was 45 and Graham was 22. Movieline magazine, 2000.

 * If you ever bought a dog what did you buy? You bought a fucking puppy. You don't buy a 13-year-old German shepherd. You buy a nice young puppy - what are you crazy?
 * On bringing a 19-year-old date to a red carpet event in 2000, when Woods was 52 from a WENN article published in that year cited in "Amber Tamblyn says James Woods tried to pick her up when she was 16" CBS News (September 12, 2017)

 * He is a Muslim. He can deny it, his apologists in the media can refute it, and his enablers can promote a narrative that he is a Christian. It’s a pack of lies. Obama is a Muslim and that is where his allegiance lies. Always has. Always will.
 * Tweet (December 24, 2017)

 * The degree to which this one Nazi collaborator has undermined the stability of Western democracies is virtually incalculable. He is satanic.
 * Tweet about George Soros (October 13, 2018) cited in "From 'Satanic' to 'Anti-Christ': Pro-Trump Attacks on George Soros Intensify as Midterms Approach" Haaretz (October 15, 2018)

 * Let’s be clear. Our problem today is not black versus white. Our problem today is George Soros versus America.
 * Tweet (June 1, 2020), cited in "Blaming Soros for protests, the right exposed its anti-Semitism – again" Forward (June 2, 2020)

 * #Antifa is merely a pawn in the plan engineered by Soros and the Deep State.
 * Tweet (June 1, 2020) cited in "Negative tweets about George Soros up to 500,000 a day, ADL says", The Times of Israel/JTA (June 3, 2020). See Snopes for the debunking of the claims about George Soros.

 * Asians are ruthless in war. Ask any American who fought in WWII, in Korea, or in Vietnam. Could China have engineered this virus (high contagion/low lethality) as a warning to President Trump not to interfere with the cozy globalist trade deals arranged by Clinton and Obama?
 * Tweet (March 22, 2020)

 * People who get what they want are often surprised when they also get what they deserve.
 * Tweet (November 7, 2020)

 * Scratch a liberal, and you will find a fascist every time.
 * I will be suing the Democratic National Committee, no matter what. Whether I win or lose, I am going to stand up for the rights of every American, not a so-called celebrity, I’m not a celebrity anymore. I’m hardly recognizable anymore because my career has been destroyed by these very people. And I will sue and I’m hoping other people will sue. And if it turns out there are a lot of us on this list where the DNC targeted us, and I will quote the immortal words of Joseph Wells when he attacked Joe McCarthy for the enemy’s list he had, at long last sir, have you no shame? President Biden, all of your Stasi little operatives in the DNC who have targeted American citizens, have you, Mr. President, have all of you at last, no shame?
 * "James Woods: Elon Musk may have saved America" Tucker Carlson Tonight, Fox News, (December 2, 2022).
 * Following Elon Musk's acquisition of Twitter.

Quotes about Woods

 * I can't believe I ever went out with him. That's one of those relationships you look back on and say, "What was I doing?"
 * Heather Graham.

 * James Woods tried to pick me and my friend up at a restaurant once. He wanted to take us to Vegas. "I'm 16" I said. "Even better" he said.
 * Amber Taymblyn cited in "Amber Tamblyn says James Woods tried to pick her up when she was 16" CBS News (September 12, 2017)

title: James Woods


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Wikiquote:Votes for deletion archive/Ray toro

 * The following discussion is an archived debate of the proposed deletion of the article below. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review).  No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: delete. —LrdChaos (talk) 14:30, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Ray toro
This feels like the tenth or so article for a member of the band "My Chemical Romance" (it probably isn't, but it feels like it), all of which have been created without any introduction or attempted formatting. Unlike some of the others, though, this doesn't have anything worth saving, just a single, non-memorable and non-noteworthy quote. —LrdChaos 13:48, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Vote closed. Result: delete (seven votes to delete (one from anon with no meaningful contribution history), no dissent). ——LrdChaos (talk) 14:27, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

 * Delete. —LrdChaos 13:48, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. ~ UDScott 14:12, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. That doesn't give any insight to who Ray Toro is...
 * Delete unless non-trivial, sourced quotes are added, in which case it should be moved to Ray Toro. By the way, Frank Iero (that's an "I", not an "L") doesn't really look any better, and I'd recommend its deletion, too, without decent sourced quotes. Surely MCR fans can dig up some proper sources (interviews, liner notes, music-industry reviews, etc.) for quotes worthy of inclusion? Artists like to be quoted, and want to sound profound. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 20:12, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. -- ~ ♥ * Cute 1 4 u  |talk to me! * ♥ ~  20:53, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. - InvisibleSun 17:52, 31 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. 121a0012 03:05, 1 September 2006 (UTC)

 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive of the debate. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review). No further edits should be made to this page.


text:
Wikiquote:Votes for deletion archive/Lubomir vaic

 * The following discussion is an archived debate of the proposed deletion of the article below. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review).  No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: delete. —LrdChaos (talk) 14:31, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Lubomir vaic
Minor hockey player without any noteworthy achievements. The page itself reads (to me) as though it's been written by some fan, bitter about that fact but devoted to the person. —LrdChaos 13:51, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Vote closed. Result: delete (six votes to delete, no dissent). —LrdChaos (talk) 14:28, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

 * Delete. —LrdChaos 13:51, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. ~ UDScott 14:12, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. -- ~ ♥ * Cute 1 4 u  |talk to me! * ♥ ~  20:54, 29 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. The article states that the attributed quote is a paraphrase, which makes it inadequate as the sole quote. - InvisibleSun 17:57, 31 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. And there's no WP article on him, either. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 23:53, 31 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. 121a0012 03:05, 1 September 2006 (UTC)

 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive of the debate. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review). No further edits should be made to this page.


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Ask a Ninja

Ask a Ninja is a series of comedy videos about the image of ninjas in popular culture available in podcast and vodcast form, as well as in the popular mov and wmv file formats. The first episode was released in November 2005, but production and editing of that initial episode is not as proficient as the episodes from number 2 (January 2006) onwards.

The Ninja

 * {catch phrase} I look forward to killing you soon.

Question 2: Ninja Santa

 * There's the myth that Santa wears red. That is very true. But the red comes from the blood of children who have woken up in the middle of the night, and sneaked downstairs to try to get a glimpse of Santa.

Question 3: Ninja Training

 * The Ninjas give you a 5,000 multiple choice questionnaire, and it's tricky.

Question 4: Hiring A Ninja

 * You don't hire ninjas for everyone you need to kill... that's what Italians are for!

Question 5: Ninja Skills

 * There are two main categories of ninjas skills: Deadly and possibly deadly.
 * And then there's the trash talking that goes on on Xbox Live. Ooh, have you heard some of these kids? I got going with Junkboy45 from Waukegan, Illinois. I just want to... I'm gonna figure out how to do that as a ninja. Just reach through the internet and actually strangle a thirteen year-old over the internet.

Question 6: Master of Disguise

 * You must be able to fold yourself in the wind so that you can you know like... hide from everyone... well, it's like... there's wind... and then you can't be seen.

Question 7: Ninja Grub

 * I suppose nobody has to eat if they don't want to, but that's called Nicole Richie... or Africa.
 * My Ninja sauce will make you shoot your mother in the head.

Question 8: Roger

 * There are not ninjas following you around like they're going to kill you... there's just one, his name is Roger and he hates your guts, buddy!

 * The ninja code forbids a dark knight from killing someone based on semantics, speech impediments and the misuse of colloquialisms.

Question 9: Ninja Love

 * If ninjas can be accused of anything, it's loving too much. Loving to death, as a matter of fact.
 * Have I stolen the hearts of a few ladies? Guilty! Unfortunately I was not able to return them before they bled to death!

Question 10: Ninja Metal

 * For years, we've been using Warped Tour as a training exercise. Never mosh with a ninja. We'll kill ya.
 * An iPod Ninja is like an iPod Nano, except it's a million times thinner, it has awesome vid capabilities... and it's a usable shuriken.

Question 11: Ninja Dogs

 * Laziness! Sure! That's what being a Ninja is all about! *Sarcasm!*
 * Canine ninjas or caninjas are serious business. I had a friend who taught his dog how to use hyper ninja speed like (makes whooshing noises) ripped his arms right out of his sockets.

Question 12: Ninja Colds

 * Can ninjas catch colds? I guess the better question would be: can colds catch ninjas? Nope. We're faster than germs.  So then yes, ninjas can catch colds.

 * The only disease that a ninja is susceptible to is Saturday Night Fever.

 * I'll tell you this though: sometimes colds get very lazy, and they hire ninjas to do the killing for them. Black Plague: Ninjas. Before we came along, it was just known as 'that thing that's going around'. We can change flu season into 'Hey can I borrow your barn to store the bodies until spring" season faster than Tara Reid can destroy a viable career.

Question 14: Ninja Gifts

 * Giving a ninja something black is like giving crazy to Angelina Jolie. It's like giving guns to Master Chief.  Like giving boobs to Dolly Parton.  We already have plenty.

Question 15: Deciding Like a Ninja

 * Eeny, meeny, miney, dead Catch a ninja by his head If he hollers kick him back, Then remove his still beating heart and watch him die slowly and painfully.

Question 16: How To Kill a Ninja

 * Thanks for your question Randy, you look forward to killing me soon! Hi-ya-whuh?
 * Gotta be on your toes at a Ninja funeral.

Question 17: Ninja Omnibus

 * Gauntlet thrown, gauntlet picked-up and now I'm ready to bludgeon you over the head with the gauntlet.

 * I'm a Ninja! (His answer to most the questions in the episode)

 * If a ninja does anything ANYWHERE, it doesn't make a sound, and if it does, it'll probably be the last sound you ever hear.

 * Enough
 * In response to
 * How much sleep does a ninja get?
 * How much do ninjas bathe?
 * How many different kinds of weapons are there?

 * It's Michael Palin with his face in a pie times Douglas Adams squared!
 * In response to the question "What is the circumference of a moose?"

 * Do you ever get tired of being alive?
 * in response to "Do you ever get tired of being a ninja?"

 * Complicated.
 * In response to the question "What is integral theory?"

 * A cream puff. A very deadly cream puff. Underneath the pastry it has very sharp angles on it and the cream that's inside is poison and the powdered sugar is actually, uh, powdered swords. That's a pretty deadly food right there. I wouldn't mind being that food. Would not want to eat one though.
 * In response to If ninja could be food what food would it be?

 * Let's kick this Pig!

 * Kids remember this. Nothing is impossible, But it is not very likely
 * In response to "Is it possible to meet you without you killing me?"

 * The one that kills you!
 * In response to "Of all the ninja skills, which is the deadliest?"

Question 18: Minjas

 * Yes, there are nindgets. Who actually prefer to be called "minjas."

 * Never pick up a minja. They'll tear your arms off, and they'll beat you to death with your arm, which is not fun. I've seen people enjoy being killed, and that's definitely not one of those instances. I mean, a common thing that someone says when they're being beaten to death with their own arms by a minja is, "This is not fun. This is not fun. This is not fun." Usually it's a lot more screamy and painy.

Question 19: Physics

 * Will you please leave us alone? My relationship with physics is my business.

 * (To the National Geographic Theme music) Look at that monkey. What has that monkey got in his hand?

Question 20: KillaCon

 * It's not really ninja specific, its just basically for anyone who really enjoys killing people
 * Signing up normally takes place in a cave a couple feet east of uh... The center of the earth!

Question 21: Revolution Cubed

 * Now Karaoke Revolution, I think we all know what's wrong with this softcore bore-oke, lame-oke, I-really-don't-care-oke.
 * The French Revolution? Now, that was a real revolution. Classic comedy. People who think that the French have no sense of humor have never seen someone guillotined.

Question 22: Ninja Excuses

 * Uhh... yeah, you know what, that sounds great. I'd really enjoy doing that. The thing is... I've just recently started volunteering with the BBSSA, the Brittle Bones Syndrome Shut-ins with Amnesia Foundation and you're pretty much always on call with those people.
 * Ninjas train in excuses.
 * World Cup. Perfect excuse. Honestly, most people don't know how the World Cup works...
 * You save your weddings, anniversaries or deaths for the big events you want to avoid like "Hey, I've got an extra ticket to the Mariah Carey concert."
 * I have to stop zombie Tupac from releasing another album from beyond the grave!
 * I have to pick up my flying snake from the cave of eyes and teeth.
 * I would but the International Order of Ninjas has just approved the killing of Jonathan Lipnicki and I can't miss out.

Question 23: Ninternships

 * I love the spunk.... Don't take that out of context.

 * Ninternship program is not for ninjas, ninternship its for ninjaish people, ninja wannabes its ninjannabes.

 * If you do get into our program be prepared for death, yours and other people.

Question 24: Thr33

 * Thr33 was the original 1337.

 * Regular ninja is usually enough... Ninja to the power of three? Forget about it.

 * Thr33 woke up the next morning to find themselves surrounded by one million, eight hundred and ninety-five thousand eight hundred and sixty three severely pissed off monkey-dragons!

Question 25: Summer Jobs

 * It sounds like you need to turn your 'bummer job' into a 'fummer job'. I thought that was going to work out better than it did.

 * How 'bout this? Grab a stapler, some spare fur that might be lying around, and your threshold for pain, and turn your face into a woodland creature!

 * Hey, hey, hey! If you're not killing somebody, get out of the deep end.

 * The little ones are the easiest kills, because you just pop the water wings and then (makes drowning noises).

 * One summer I had a good time just driving a bad humor truck. "Alright, who's up for chocolate covered kitten? How 'bout a squirrel with a banana shoved down its throat?"

Question 26: Least Favorite

 * If people really realized how rude and inconsiderate badgers were, they would get a lot more mascot work.

 * You know what I will say? My least favorite thing to kill is a robot. And I know what you're thinking: 'What? Robots seem fun to kill.' But There's no splatter with a robot. When I stab something, I like the (squishing sound) I like the squish of a good kill, and robots just don't have it.

 * I like the killin'.

 * Killing is such a positive thing.

 * You miss 100% of the people you don't stab.

 * Cherish your dreams, for they are the blueprint of YOUR HOUSE OF PAIN!

 * Whether you think you're dead or not, you're right.

Question 27: Standing In Lines

 * Lines are one of the biggest enemies of the ninja.

 * They should have a ninja channel.

 * Next time you're in a line, just put down your basket of frozen loneliness: reminders that you have no one in your life.

 * Honestly, lines are not about making friends.

 * Ninja lines at ninja meetings, still and straight are the key words. They're constantly throwing shurikens dipped in flesh-eating bacteria up and down the aisles. You lean forward a little bit, suddenly you don't have an epidermal layer. Which is helpful; it's good to have a layer of skin.

 * Black lines...They will kill your brain...Black lines! Don't do it!

Question 28: Niniature Golf

 * We will play niniature golf, which has some parallels to miniature golf, but I really would not recommend it for a fifth birthday party.

 * That's not how you want to spend a Friday night. Em-barrassing! When you've been spaghettified through the fabric of the universe, you aren't getting a kiss. Nobody wants to kiss someone that's been infinitely diminished.

 * If you get winged by an ice cube from a giant frozen primate...you feel that, you feel that.

 * Don't try and play the whole game with one sword! You don't use a Dark Dragon Blade when you're really supposed to be using the Hell Guardian. Use an Orc-Cleaver when you're supposed to use an Orc-Cleaver!

 * You take a friend to Putt-Putt golf, but you take an enemy to Cut-Cut golf.

Question 29: BBQ

 * That's a little T-L-C from the N-I-N-J-A.
 * 'If you can't stand the heat, get out of the volcano.' That's the saying. But the reality is, if you can stand the heat, you probably don't have the time to get out the volcano, because your skin is melting off Raiders of the Lost Ark style. (Imitates melting Nazis from said movie) I like that. That's a good scene. Kinda gets you right there (gestures to heart) Little touching.

Question 30: Ninja Omnideuce

 * Uh, no...What are you talking about?...There's a law against that...My hamster ate the list, and then...my hamster was eaten by something with...TWO heads...
 * Q: Can you do an episode about how many lies a Ninja can make up in a minute?

 * You never had it to begin with.
 * Q: Can I have it back?

 * Because you let life suck at you.
 * Q: Why do I suck at life?

 * RUN, PAUL, RUN! Anywhere on Earth but Ohio!  There's a codependent, clingy, dysfunctional clan of weirdos there that is trying to drag you into a monotonous hell of watery chili and mediocre sports franchises!
 * Acting on a request by viewer to convince viewer's brother Paul to move back to Ohio.

 * No. We ride diecycles; and we never shorten the name.
 * Q: Do ninjas ride bicycles?

 * I know that's not a question, but, um, I just thought that was kinda cool.
 * Upon seeing an ASCII drawing of a handgun.

 * No. Ninjas glide silently in love with two swords drawn.
 * Q: Do ninjas fall in love?

 * Yes, there are Gay Ninjas.
 * Q: Ninja oh Ninja, where for art thou Ninja, hast thou Ninja ben killed by a Ninja who is more deadly than thou art?

 * Did you?
 * Q: Did you ever went to school?

 * Jedis are tucked away safely on your DVDs, ninjas are standing right behind you. Seriously.
 * Q: What is the difference between a Jedi and a ninja?

 * Because they're ninjas.
 * Q: Why are ninjas called ninjas?

 * Yes.
 * Q: If you could kill any historical figure or figures, who would you kill, how would you kill them and why?

 * From the dead.
 * Q: How do ninjas raise their children?

 * It's harder not to be a ninja.
 * Q: Is it hard to be a ninja?

 * Yes I actually have, all of them at the same time.
 * Q: Did you ever do any of the following?
 * Ride the wing of a 747?
 * Use a boiling hot burrito as a weapon?
 * Fight with an alien?

 * QUIET!
 * Q: What should I be for Halloween?

 * They're video games ... I can beat video games, with the exception of Katamari I fall asleep, just a huge ball of boring.
 * Q: Can you beat Ryu Hayabusa, Ninja Gaiden, Narato, Scorpion...

 * His name was badass. Sir Badass Killington.
 * Q: Who was the badass ninja who trained you?

 * DON'T
 * Q: What is the proper etiquette for hugging a ninja?

 * Not be a ninja. Or can't they?
 * Q; What can't a ninja do?

 * Deal No deal, dudududu no wait sheesh you don't wanna end up with $1!
 * Q: Deal or no deal?

 * Duck. It basically just involved someone swinging a board at you as fast as possible and you trying not to get hit... I miss Joey... he was never any good at that game.
 * Q: What was your favourite board game as a little ninja?

 * Sure. My morning jog often consists of running across several counties. I get up around 5am and run at the earth's rotation till about ... well until 5am because it's, 'cause it's just crossing time zones. I'm going to need a diagram.
 * Q; Do ninjas run cross country?

Question 31: TechNINlogy

 * You've heard of Big Brother? He's a ninja! And you are gonna need more than a duffel bag full of guns and a butched-out Carrie-Anne Moss to get through his lobby!

 * I work in the world as a shadow of death, and...?

 * We are watchers! We are lurkers! We are, we are lurkers and lookers, we are lookers and lurkers...we're luuoorkers.

 * Nothing could be closer to the truth, but still miss the mark entirely.

 * A ninja is not a one trick pony! We are an infinite trick pony!
 * And it's not regular pony hair; it's like little snakes.
 * And it's not even a real pony. It's a ninja inside a pony, and we sneak out one of the oversized ears and we punch you...while you're feeding the pony bacon.
 * Ponies love bacon, not a lot of people know that.

 * Boy, you never see cats laugh, do you? A smirk, maybe, but you never see a cat laughing. There was that one cat in the Laff-a-Lympics that would do that "hee-hee" but it was kinda like a wheezy...That was creepy.

 * (singing) Ninja eyes *clap clap* are watchin' you, plannin' to remove yo' spleen...

 * A ninja is never a master of death until he is an observer of life! Anne Frank said that! Or... Dr. Frankenstein. It was either Anne Frank or Dr. Frankenstein that said that. Frankly, I like to watch!

 * TechNINlogy is all the technology developed by ninjas, for ninjas! FNBN, YO!

 * Couple of things about TechNINlogy: Really cool, pretty addictive, and rather dangerous. And I don't just mean dangerous like, "oh that could be dangerous if that fell into the wrong hands". Its dangerous when it's in the right hands
 * It's like manning 2 Wii controllers after drinking six Throttles.

 * It's like a bright, sunny day in Deathsville.

 * When you feel like absolutely no one's watching you, that's probably a ninja. Yeah. Pretty heavy stuff.

Question 32: Ninja Dates

 * ...We had to hide a whole 'nother month of dates in the calendar. We had a little trouble naming that month. Originally we were going to call it "Dismember". But then there was a big push for "Kill-gust". And then somebody proposed, "Will", which was kind of a response to May, because they had never really liked the tentativeness of "May".

 * Janinjuary is made up of all the time people spend spaced out.

 * We make a nanosecond of really ridiculously loud noise to honor our foreninjas. We thought about doing a moment of silence, but then we thought, "You know what, most moments that a ninja spends are already moments of silence; we should do something different than that," because it would just be called a moment.

 * How about Theodeath Slicerstein, the person who coined the phrase, "Hi-ya!"? He was the first person who said it. Before that, it was just random. We were just going, "Carrot!" "Sneakers!" It was just bad.

 * Don't snap out of it, because you may catch a ninja off-guard and he's gonna snap you back into it... permanently.

 * The more you drool, the more it rains in Janinjuary. If you slobber, you're a goner. I wish it rhymed, it doesn't, but that does not mean it's not true.

"Special Delivery 7: Pirates of the Caribbean"

 * Kraken, Kraken, Kraken, Kraken, Kraken.
 * Describing the movie in question.
 * Ninjas have been proven to be better then any Pirate. If you don't believe me, look it up on Google Fight. Google knows everything.

Question 33: Hidey's Disease

 * Made possible by the Better Killing Through Education Fund & viewers like you.
 * After the end of the "video" about Hidey's Disease.

 * Some of the symptoms of Phase I include: sleeping in coffee cans, changing your name to a pronoun, like "he"...that they think is a lot sneakier if they're just like "He?" "Who's He?" "He's who?" "No, no!" "She's who." "Who's what?" "No!" "What's they!?" "They aren't even here anymore!"

 * It's Phase III that the disease gets personal! It convinces the ninja that life itself is out to get it!

 * Life is no fun when you're hiding from existence itself!

Special Delivery 10: Pop!Tech

 * Um... A bunch of geeks in Maine?
 * In response to the question, "What the heck is Pop!Tech 2006?"

 * Bright green possibilities? How 'bout dark black guarantees.

 * I don't want to be a spoiler. I'll give you a hint. It starts with "nin" and it ends your life. Any guesses? No? It's a ninja!

 * Conflict: we got plenty of that. Resolution--well I think we all agree there can be only one. And the possibility of peace? It's still nonexistent.

Question 35: Ninja Poetry

 * Do ninjas write poetry or are they just murderous shadows of death, put on earth only to act against mankind?... Wow! I didn't realize those were the only two options.

 * (After imitating Sean Penn) That is acting against mankind. Ninjas pursue mental, physical, and spiritual perfection. A very subtle difference, I see how you could have possibly made the mistake -- if you were, perhaps, a cup of dirt.

 * Sometimes the shorter the poem the better, try this one out for size: Black black black black black black black black black black black black...death.

 * Flower, Pretty Flower. I stop to smell you, you take my nose away. Wait a minute!? Why are you so sharp!? You are not a flower. Now I have no nose. Face, Bloody Face.

 * There once was a ninja from Nantucket. Who kept all his swords in a bucket. He started to spin and exclaimed with a grin, When I let this thing go you best duck it!

 * I look forward to plucking the sun from your universe and watching the cold of time and the void of space slowly dissolve the existence that was you... soon.

 * Silly Sara was a zombie. Wacky, wild, weird, and wombie. She loved walking, she loved rain, she loved groaning, she loved brains!

 * This one here is an acrostic called shadow. Silent, Hanging, Asp, Dropping, Ouch!, Wathump!

Question 36: Clubs

 * A club without the right direction is a misguided stick.

 * And a leprechaun -- those little suckers are like Colin Farrell. They are little, obnoxious, and really good with women.

Question 37: Last Words

 * Like a vampire? They are yappy.

 * I have experienced a lot of last words. More than most people, I would have to say.

 * People have this romantic notion that, like, what they say at the very end is gonna be the most meaningful thing of their lives. If that is the case, most people's lives are summed up by screaming, wheezing, or saying some incoherent babble.

 * And you're just like, "Come on, Mom! There's Teddy Grahams that I want to eat! I don't like the old lady who smells like purple."

Question 38: College Tips

 * It has been scientifically proven that ponytails shut down the part of the brain that allows you to say things that are interesting or relevant.

Question 39: Mirrors

 * Vampires, they can't be seen in mirrors because they're enchanted, undead, and stupid. Ninjas can't be seen in mirrors because we're just so dang quick! We can break a mirror and then jump out of the way so that the seven years of bad luck hits somebody else.

 * Hold the shuriken, blurken! I am way better looking than you!

 * Drop the ego, amigo! You're just a reflection.

Question 41: Film Ninjoir

 * Wow, Greg! You really know how to ask the hard-hitting questions that the world needs answered. Or, at least the small portion of the world that makes up the nerdinjas that watch this show. Love you guys.
 * I am going at this with the fury of a thousand sand-spewing desert bears!
 * As much as she scared the bejeebies out of me, I have to admit that she had legs to spare. About fourteen. I counted fourteen.
 * But me and trouble have two things in common: We love a challenge, and we hate to be alone on Tuesdays.

Question 42: Ninja Sayings

 * So when you hear someone say, "You're the apple of my eye," what they really mean is, "You're a great short-term solution to an annoying problem."

 * Read between the lines--because sometimes, there's a ninja there.

Question 45: Ninja Omnitrois

 * There is nothing wrong with that pollution in London. That pollution is doing great. It's like a giant smoginja.
 * In response to the question, "What is wrong with the pollution in London?"

 * I'd like to think that ninjas speak the international language of pain.
 * In response to the question, "Can ninjas speak other languages?"

 * How come you're drinkier when I'm funny?
 * In response to the question, "How come you're funnier when I'm drinking?"

 * I think if they were really ninjas, it would have been called Batman Ends!
 * In response to the question, "What do you think about the ninjas in Batman Begins?

 * If it weren't for us, America would be called South Canada.
 * In response to the question, "How have ninjas affected American History?"

Mythbustin' Out All Over

 * It's not that I don't trust him as a person, it's just I don't think he's a person.

 * I could do it right now, except that right now it's part of a move where I would be above both of you and I would pull out your brains.

Question 46: UFC

 * How can anything be Ultimate if it doesn't involve a Ninja!

 * Unicorn Forensics Championships

 * Urban Frog Crew. They are a tough bunch of ribbitting rappers!

 * Unidentified Flying Cross-dressers

 * Uncooperative Freight Company

 * Underwater Forty Chuggers

 * Unbelievably Flippin' Cool!

 * Used Fried Chicken

Question 48: Ninja Recipes

 * If you have a weak stomach, or if most of the things you eat have "Mac" in front of them, you'd better change the channel. Because it's time for... Cooked to Death!

 * But the recipe that I'm going to give you today is just for a good, common disaster. Here's the basic ingredients you're going to need. You're going to need a cup of the idea of chaos, not chaos. Now you're going to need about a half-pound of sliced trouble, as thin as you can get it sliced. And about a half-pound of of sliced miscommunication. Now, you're also going to need one bearded man. Just any sized bearded man will do. Make sure that he's ripe.

 * You want to think about it like a very poisonous lasagna. With just a layer of trouble, a layer of miscommunication. A layer of trouble, and a layer of miscommunication.

 * Here's the ninja recipe for pain. Take any situation, add a ninja.

Question 49: Ninja Life Span

 * Most ninjas live until they die. Some a little bit longer, some a little bit shorter. It just really depends on how much metaphor they apply to the idea of life.

 * I'll put you in the middle of the nebberwet... or the... or the... what did you just say? (The Ninja's Grandpa)

 * You watch it! I'll talk to your internal organs! Better yet, I'll make your internal organs talk to each other. Make a little puppet show out of them. (The Ninja's Grandpa)

 * Why is nobody laughing? If the intertube audience was here, they'd be dying. (Grandpa)
 * Not of laughter. (The Ninja)

 * You have to defy reality herself! And that reality, boy, she is one saucy bird! (Grandpa)

 * There's some advice for you. Don't go a-courtin' anybody whose very existence you question. (Grandpa)

 * And I will tell you right now, if you are facing down a camel-leopard, and you're trying to kill it with pantomime--boy, your space work better be pretty darn good. (Grandpa)

 * So to wrap things up, I think it's pretty safe to say that most ninjas live a little bit longer than you want them to. (The Ninja)

Question 59: OmniJeff

 * Question: Could you give us a brief lesson on Ninja history?
 * Answer: Once upon a time, there were not ninjas. Now the world is a better place.

 * Question: Do ninjas sleepwalk?
 * Answer: Yes, but you're the one who's sleeping, and we're the ones who are walking. We also sleep-strangle, sleep-stab, and sleep-poison.

 * Question: Do ninjas have to do paperwork?
 * Answer: Sure. It's called Gorigami. I can make a paper shuriken, I can make a paper sword, I can make a paper grappling hook. There's an old saying that says if you can't kill it with paper, you cannot kill it with steel. Quote it.

 * Question: I was wondering, are there lolninjas?
 * Answer: I CAN HAS DEATHBURGER?

 * Question: Hey Ninja, how would the last stand of the 300 Spartans have been if it was ninjas instead of Spartans?
 * Answer: A lot quicker, a lot more clothing, and with about two hundred and ninety-nine bored ninjas.

 * Question: I have to give a presentation next week...any ninja tips on presenting?
 * Answer: Just make sure the pointy end is facing them. That is Power Point.

 * Question: Have you ever fought the wind?
 * Answer: Why would I ever fight the wind? Do you have any idea what would happen if I broke the wind? It would stink for everybody.

 * Question: Brandon Lee, or Jeff Speakman?
 * Answer: You know what? Given both of their conditions today, I'm still going to go with zombie Brandon Lee.

 * Question: How many ninjas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
 * Answer: None. We're the ones who took the old light bulb out. Pretty scary, huh?

Question 76: Ninja vs. Crazy People

 * But I guess that I could see how to the non-trained, non-ninja STUPID HEAD, you might think that ninjas and crazy people have something in common.

 * Ninjas throw shurikens and spears. Crazy people throw tantrums and poop.

 * Ninjas know hundreds of deadly techniques. Crazy people know each ceiling tile in their room personally.

 * Ninjas train constantly to stay in peak physical form. Crazy people, however, make a conductor's hat out of a ham sandwich and drive a cafeteria tray around like it's a choo-choo train.

 * Ninjas battle for truth and honor. Crazy people battle a chair named Taco. Are you seeing the difference yet?

 * Ninjas will choose death before dishonor. That's just our thing. Crazy people will choose tapioca before Jell-o.

 * Ninjas can slow their heartbeat and their breathing to appear dead. Crazy people can count to bunny rabbit using made-up numbers.

Uncategorized

 * You asking me to stop moving around so much would be like me asking you to stop liking Britney Spears, even though she's a fatty right now.

 * A Sneakret is a really really sneaky secret.

 * If you try to speak them, the words will sneak out of your mouth and go hide somewhere in a county fair.

title: Ask a Ninja


text:
User talk:DIV1235666454

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 14:49, 12 September 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:DIV1235666454