text:
Smokey and the Bandit

Smokey and the Bandit is a 1977 film about a former thrillseeking trucker's attempt to bootleg a truckload of beer to settle a bet, and a small town Texas sheriff's attempts to stop him on behalf of his jilted son.
 * Directed by Hal Needham. Written by Hal Needham, Robert L. Levy, James Lee Barrett, Charles Shyer and Alan Mandel.

What we're dealing with here is a complete lack of respect for the law. taglines

Sheriff Buford T. Justice

 * Now, you boys just stay here and watch the car - might be some vandals around, wanna steal somethin'. So you boys just stay here and keep your hands on the car until one of my associates arrive. And don't go home. And don't go to eat. And don't play with yourself. Wouldn't look nice on my highway. You can think about it, but dooon't do it.
 * She insulted my town! She insulted my son! [Junior starts to say something] Shaddup! She insulted my authority! And that's nothin' but pure and simple old-fashioned communism. Happens every time one of those dancers starts poon-tangin' around with those show-folk fags! I can see her now... runnin' back up that aisle. No, she was dancin' back up the aisle. Her knockers bouncin' all over the joint. Her ass was wigglin' too!
 * [On the CB radio, hailing the Bandit] You got trouble comin'. My handle is Smokey Bear, and I'm tail-grabbin' yo' ass right now!
 * [After trying to pass Snowman and being pit maneuvered] What we're dealing with here... is a complete lack of respect for the law.
 * [Responding to a policeman who was unable to stop Bandit at a roadblock] You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella!
 * Apology accepted. Now, [a truck passes by, blowing its air horn and conveniently obscuring his profanity] fuck off.

Bo "the Bandit" Darville

 * [to Big and Little Enos] Oh, I love your suits. It must be a bitch finding suits size 68 extra fat and a 12 dwarf.
 * [to Snowman's wife] I find it hard to look at you Waynette, especially when you've got those things in your hair. Makes me think you're listening to a radio station in Savannah.
 * [On why he's going to make the run to Texas and back] For the good 'ol American life. For the money, for the glory, and for the fun. Mostly for the money.
 * [In the middle of a car chase he explains to Carrie why they are being pursued] Oh, I forgot to tell 'ya. I'm running blocker for 400 cases of illegal booze!
 * [Carrie is hyperly saying she wants to jump something in the car] Oh, jump me.
 * [Over radio to Sheriff Justice] I can't lie to you, Sheriff. You're too good a man.

Cletus "The Snowman" Snow

 * [Talking over CB radio] Hey, you got peanut butter or somethin' in your ears? Tell me what that woman's got on! (Pause) Her mind? [Laughs wildly] Ten-four!
 * You got the one Snowman! I'm eastbound and down!
 * [Writing out note for beer] Send... bill... to... Big... Enos... Burdette. (Trans-Am drives away) Burdette.. B... B-E-R... B-U-R... B... (Throws notepad aside) Hell, I got to go.
 * [On the CB radio, about his dog] I'm gettin' worried about Fred here, he's lookin' a little thin in the skin!

Other

 * Junior: [Chasing after his father, who is driving after the Bandit] Who's gonna hold your hat?!
 * Little Enos: [remarking to Big Enos about the Bandit's "legend" status] Well a legend and an out-of-work bum look a lot alike, Daddy!

Dialogue

 * Bandit: Just what the hell you want?
 * Big Enos: For you to get outta this dumbass rodeo, and accept a real challenge!
 * [...]
 * Bandit: Now, you want me to drive to Texarkana, pick up 400 cases of Coors and come back in 28 hours. No problem.
 * Little Enos: It ain't never been done before, hot shit.
 * Bandit: You watch your language, little lady. The problem here, is that Coors beer, you take that east of Texas and that's uh, that's bootlegging.
 * Little Enos: You know, I think you're just a little bit scared.
 * Bandit: That's great psychology. Why don't you say something bad about my mother?
 * Little Enos: Yo' mamma is so ugly-
 * Bandit: Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. Why do you want that beer so bad?
 * Little Enos: Cause he's thirsty, dummy!

 * [Bandit barges into Snowman's bedroom]
 * Bandit: In the past, I may have done you wrong. But in the future Cletus, I will never ever do you wrong again. Right?
 * Snowman: Right.
 * Bandit: We have a chance. A big chance - to make a run, for some big bucks. Eighty thousand of them.
 * Snowman: Oh, really? What we gonna do, kidnap the Pope or somethin?
 * Bandit: How'd you guess. [Laughs]. No - we gotta go to Texas and pick up 400 cases of Coors. And bring 'em back in 28 hours.
 * Snowman: Whoa. I gotta flash for you. That's called bootleggin' and that's against the law.

 * [Bandit and Snowman break into the warehouse holding the beer]
 * Bandit: Hey, want a beer? [Laughs]
 * Snowman: Well, son! Redneck heaven! How do we load all this stuff though?
 * Bandit: Hey, I'll load it on with this! [Gets into a nearby forklift truck]
 * Snowman: You can't drive no forklift!
 * Bandit: I can drive any forkin' thing around.
 * Snowman: [stands on the forks of the vehicle] Will you get serious? Can you drive this thing? [Bandit drives forward] Back it up!
 * Bandit: Oh, shut up! [Bandit raises the forks]
 * Snowman: Whoa, hold it! I said BACK it up, not RAISE it up! [Bandit reverses then drives the forklift at speed towards the boxes] Hold it! The beer! Watch the beer!
 * [The Bandit abruptly stops the forklift; Snowman is catapulted over the cartons of beer]
 * Bandit: [Laughs] Y'all right?
 * Snowman: [Yelling from behind the cartons] Very funny, very funny!
 * Bandit: I thought it was!

 * Snowman: Hey,Bandit! Me and Fred got a question.
 * Bandit: What do you and Fred want?
 * Snowman: How come we doin' this?
 * Bandit: Well, why not?
 * Snowman: Well, they said it couldn't be done!
 * Bandit: That's the reason, son!

 * Sheriff Justice: Nobody... Nobody makes Sheriff Buford T. Justice look like a possum's pecker!
 * Junior: Except for that-
 * Sheriff Justice: Shut yo' ass...

 * [A funeral procession has succeeded in blocking Sheriff Justice's progress, allowing the Bandit to escape]
 * Junior: Damn, he had a lot of friends, didn't he?
 * Sheriff Justice: If they'd have cremated the sumbitch, I'd have been kickin' that Mr. Bandit's ass around the moon by now!

 * Sheriff Justice: [to the local Sheriff on the radio]: This is Sheriff Buford T. Justice again. I've lost that Trans Am. Set up a road block.
 * Junior: Good idea!
 * Sheriff Justice: What the hell would you know?!
 * [Shortly later, after the Bandit foils the road block and escapes]
 * Deputy Sheriff: Did you see that? They went right through our road block!
 * Sheriff Justice: You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella!

 * [Sheriff Justice has been calling for support on the radio and is hailed by a local sheriff]
 * Sheriff Branford: Did you say that you are a sheriff?
 * Sheriff Justice: That's a big ten-four! This is Sheriff Buford T. Justice, of Texas!
 * Sheriff Branford: Texas? You realize of course that you are out of your jurisdiction? I suggest that you let my department handle the situation.
 * Sheriff Justice: That's very comfortin'. But I'm in high speed pursuit! Don't you hear good?
 * Sheriff Branford: I hear perfectly. The fact that you are a sheriff is not germane to the situation.
 * Sheriff Justice: The goddamn Germans got nothin' to do with it!
 * Junior: What'd he say?
 * Sheriff Justice: [cutting him off] Shut up! One shit at a time!
 * Junior: All right.
 * [Shortly later, after Branford's patrol car has been pushed over the edge of a demolished bridge into a river by Justice's vehicle]
 * Sheriff Justice: Hey, boy, where's Sheriff Bradford?
 * Sheriff Branford: I am Sheriff Branford!
 * Sheriff Justice: Well, for some reason or another, you sounded a little taller on radio! [Turns away, with Junior standing beside him] What the hell is the world comin' to?
 * [Sheriff Branford is black, and it was historically common for Southern whites to address black males, even adults, as 'boy'.]

 * [a truck driver has sheared a door off of Sheriff Justice's patrol car]
 * Buford T. Justice: I saw that, you sumbitch! You did that on purpose! You're goin' away till you're gray! I got the evidence! [speaks to Junior] Put the evidence in the car.
 * Junior: But Daddy...
 * Buford T. Justice: Put the evidence in the car! [shouting to trucker again, who is long out of earshot] I'm gonna barbeque yo' ass in molasses!
 * [Eventually, Justice turns back to his damaged car; Junior has obediently taken the broken-off door and sat in the passenger seat with the door in his lap.]
 * Buford T. Justice: Put the evidence in the back. [Junior struggles to put it in the back, Buford stares at him for several moments in exasperation] There is no way, no way, that you could come from my loins. Soon as I get home, the first thing I'm gonna do is punch your momma in the mouth.

 * Carrie: Actually, my heaviest relationship was with an acid-rock singer... named Robert Crumly. We were together, oh, eight-and-a-half days. God, I really thought that was it.
 * Bandit: And?
 * Carrie: One day, I came home and found him in the shower... with a girl... and her mother!
 * Bandit: Well, at least he kept it in the family.

 * Junior: Daddy, my hat blew off!
 * Sheriff Justice: I hope your God damn head was in it!

 * [Nearly at the destination, pursued by a vast fleet of police cars, now with helicopter support, The Bandit picks up his CB radio.]
 * Bandit: Cletus?
 * Snowman: Talk to me, m'boy!
 * Bandit: Goddamn it, son, we gave it our best shot. I don't like it any more than you do, but... we ain't gonna make it, son. We're gonna hang it up.
 * Snowman: WHOA! Negatory, negatory, what're you, crazy or something?! We come this far, ain't we?! LOOK, WHEN WE SAY WE GONNA DO A JOB, WE GONNA DO A JOB!
 * Bandit: It's me they after! They don't even know Cletus Snow exists!
 * Snowman: Oh, they don't? Well, I tell you what we gonna do! (Laughs) We just gonna introduce 'em to the boy. So move over a bit, good buddy, 'cause the Snowman is coming through! [Hangs up his CB radio and looks at Fred the dog] Hold on to your ass, Fred.

 * [Bandit and company arrive at the fairgrounds with the beer, after evading the police]
 * Bandit: [to Big Enos] We need two things, we need a way out of here, and we need the money.
 * Big Enos: Well, here's my Cadillac, that will leave me with an even dozen.
 * Bandit: Cledus, get the money.
 * Snowman: Yeah, how about the money?
 * Little Enos: How about double or nothin?
 * Snowman: How about FORGETTIN' it!
 * Bandit: Wait wait, hold it! - what was that about double or nothing?
 * Little Enos: You boys wanna head up to Boston, and pick up some clam chowder for me and my daddy?
 * Carrie: You're on!
 * Bandit: [pauses] You're on!
 * Big Enos: In eighteen hours?
 * Bandit: [pauses further] You're still on!

[Bandit, Snowman and Carrie get into Big Enos' Cadillac]
 * Snowman: Whoa, hold it... and I'm divorced!
 * Big Enos: [Smugly, as the group drives away] Twenty to one I'll break the son of a bitch this time!
 * Little Enos: [Takes a stack of bills out and starts counting] Gimme five hundred on the Bandit.

 * [Bandit and company encounter Sheriff Justice on their way from the fairgrounds]
 * Bandit: [through CB radio] Sheriff, uh, Buford T. Justice, please.
 * Sheriff Justice: Who there?
 * Bandit: This is "Bandit" Darville talkin'.
 * Sheriff Justice: Where are you, you sumbitch?
 * Bandit: Before I tell you where I am, Sheriff, there's just one thing I wanna say. You must be part coon dog. I've been chased by the best of them, and son, you make 'em look like they're all runnin' in slow motion. I just wanna say that.
 * Sheriff Justice: Well, thank you, Mr. Bandit. And as the pursuer, may I say you're the goddamnedest pursuee I've ever pursued. Now that the mutual bullshit is over, [shouting angrily] where are you, you sumbitch?!
 * Bandit: Well, I'm right down at the bottom of the hill, Sheriff. I'm about six-foot-eight, in a cowboy outfit, got a little pygmy standing right beside me dressed just like me. You can't miss me. 10-4.
 * [Sheriff Justice looks down the hill; Bandit has a change of heart and decides to reveal his true identity]
 * Bandit: You know what? Scratch that. I can't lie to you, Sheriff; you're too good a man. Look over your left shoulder.
 * Sheriff Justice: [looking over his shoulder, taking on a shocked expression upon seeing the Bandit] Oof!
 * Bandit: We're on our way to Boston to pick up some clam chowder. Bye-bye!
 * [The Bandit drives away in Big Enos' Cadillac; Justice begins to follow, his car now a barely-driveable wreck.]
 * Sheriff Justice: [Shouting furiously] I'm not givin' up! I'm not givin' up!
 * Junior: [Running after his father] Daddy, don't leave me! Who's gonna hold your hat?

Taglines

 * What we're dealing with here is a complete lack of respect for the law.
 * Time to take to the road, for a quiet little drive in the country...or not.
 * Hold up on that carwash there, gentlemen. (to boys stripping Carrie's car)

Cast

 * Burt Reynolds — Bo "the Bandit" Darville
 * Jackie Gleason — Sheriff Buford T. Justice
 * Jerry Reed — Cledus "Snowman" Snow
 * Sally Field — Carrie
 * Paul Williams (songwriter) — Little Enos Burdette
 * Pat McCormick — Big Enos Burdette
 * Mike Henry — Junior

title: Smokey and the Bandit


text:
Spoonerisms

A spoonerism is a play on words in which corresponding consonants, vowels, or morphemes are switched, named after the Reverend William Archibald Spooner, Warden of New College, Oxford, who was notoriously prone to this tendency. Many "spoonerisms" attributed to Spooner are believed to have actually been made up by Oxford students.

Quotes

 * Let us drink to the queer old Dean.
 * As quoted in
 * A play on "dear old Queen".
 * You have deliberately tasted two worms and you can leave Oxford by the town drain.
 * [Alternatively] Sir, you have tasted two whole worms; you have hissed all my mystery lectures and been caught fighting a liar in the quad; you will leave Oxford by the next town drain.
 * As quoted in, also as quoted in
 * A play on "wasted two whole terms", "missed all my history lectures", "lighting a fire" and "down train".
 * The Lord is a shoving leopard.
 * As quoted in
 * A play on "loving shepherd".
 * Ladies and Gentlemen, President Hoobert Heever.
 * Attributed to radio announcer Harry von Zell, as quoted in
 * A play on US President Herbert Hoover
 * Runny be quimble, Runny be nick, Runny cump over the jandlestick.
 * Excerpt from the poem, Runny's Jig Bump, from "Runny Babbit" by Shel Silverstein, as quoted in
 * A play on the nursery rhyme Jack Be Nimble
 * Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
 * Attributed to comedian George Carlin, as quoted in
 * Leaves no tone unsterned.
 * Attributed to violinist Isaac Stern, as quoted in
 * A play on "Leave no stone unturned".
 * I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
 * Attributed to writer Dorothy Parker, as quoted in
 * Time wounds all heels.
 * Attributed to comedian Groucho Marx, as quoted in
 * A play on "Time heals all wounds".

 * Names can be spoonerisms also, like Willie Nelson (Nellie Wilson) and Bobby Hall (hobby ball).

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: Spoonerisms


text:
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User talk:Ichthys58

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User talk:Singlamohitsingla

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User talk:Missingno000

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User talk:Acs4b

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User talk:Alecdoes

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User talk:DavidBailey

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Mitt Romney
Though additional quotes and a better image on the page are very welcome, it has long been policy here that the quotes on pages should be arranged chronologically, or sequentially within sections for works arranged chronologically, not into sections organized by editor created subject headings. ~ Kalki (talk · contributions) 23:04, 9 December 2009 (UTC)
 * Hmmm. I kept it ordered by date within the sections. It just seemed like it was getting too long. I'll check the policy (can you provide a link?) and see if there's a better way to split up the article. DavidBailey 23:07, 9 December 2009 (UTC)
 * After quite a bit of discussion at various places, it became generally agreed that sorting by editor-created subject headings on pages for people had far too many complications and potential abuses, and this was reflected in the recommended layouts provided at Templates where it is specified general quotes should be arranged chronologically (though these don't actually specify the arrangement for sections devoted to works should be chronological). I am not sure whether or not a general statement rejecting subject headings was ever actually ever formally declared on any policy pages, but it was clearly the majority decision on the matter, and has been the general practice ever since. ~ Kalki (talk · contributions) 23:21, 9 December 2009 (UTC)
 * ''Gotcha. I've looked at some other notable pages, and it looks like the convention is splitting it up by sections of their life. I'll try to put together a timeline and do this for the Mitt Romney article. Thanks for the heads up. DavidBailey 23:24, 9 December 2009 (UTC)
 * ''What do you think of this layout? DavidBailey 00:23, 10 December 2009 (UTC)
 * It looks very good, and seems to conform to such formatting as has begun to be used on pages for various politicians. Thanks for the work! ~ Kalki (talk · contributions) 00:29, 10 December 2009 (UTC)

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User talk:Markcutis

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title: User talk:TAHSNOWBUNNY


text:
User talk:Furtadomj

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:45, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:Furtadomj


text:
User talk:Banannie

Welcome
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title: User talk:Banannie


text:
User talk:Crystaltear~enwikiquote

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Crystaltear. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Crystaltear~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:20, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:45, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Crystaltear~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Magandeepdhillon

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:Magandeepdhillon


text:
User talk:Mybackpages~enwikiquote

Welcome
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 * Be bold.

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Mybackpages. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Mybackpages~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:31, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:53, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Mybackpages~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Lloydw

Welcome
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title: User talk:Lloydw


text:
User talk:L33tminion

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:L33tminion


text:
User talk:EPerkoski

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:EPerkoski


text:
User talk:Oni Lukos

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:Oni Lukos


text:
User talk:Alexwulf

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:Alexwulf


text:
User talk:JDoherty

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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title: User talk:JDoherty


text:
User talk:Jeowens

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! ~ Jeff Q (talk) 04:46, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Jeowens. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Jeowens~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:27, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Jeowens


text:
Real Life Comics

Real Life Comics is a webcomic created by Mae Dean.

1999

 * November 16, 1999
 * Crystal: Wait a second... You want to make a comic about us sitting around and doing nothing?
 * Greg: Well... Yeah, sorta.
 * Dave: Great. We'll make the first one about how stupid your ideas are.

---

 * November 22, 1999
 * Dave: UO is so crappy... Why do you still play it?
 * Greg: Cause it's neat! You can be a whole new person, make acquaintances, and amass gold to buy things!
 * [Greg's eyes bug out as his character is killed by three spells]
 * Dave: I take it those weren't your acquaintances...

---

 * November 26, 1999
 * Greg: So, did you finally get that artificial intelligence out of your comp?
 * Dave: Yeah, but it wasn't easy. I had to get into the hardware to disable most of it.
 * Greg: Bet that was a pain in the butt.
 * Dave: No kidding. Damn thing wouldn't turn off, either. It kept singing "Daisy" over and over again until I finally yanked out its voice chip.

---

 * December 3, 1999
 * [Dave and Greg are playing a flight simulator, but ICQ pops up and the plane crashes]
 * Greg: I find it interesting that a product owned by America Online is ultimately responsible for our horrible deaths.

---

 * December 15, 1999
 * Greg: Now I just need to get a maintenance manual for this thing. I wonder how much oil it takes?
 * Dave: Hm... I'd say about 4 quarts.
 * Greg: How can you tell?
 * Dave: Well, maybe I'm wrong... How big would you judge that puddle of oil under your car to be?

---

 * December 30, 1999
 * [Danny says he has a 48-port hub to be used in the LAN party]
 * Greg: You will give me the hub, Mr. Bond, or you will die.
 * Danny (smiling): Back off, Goldfinger.

2001

 * March 1, 2001
 * ''[Greg wants to make a chainmail mantle, while Tony wants to make a full hauberk]
 * Greg: You do know that a chainmail shirt contains well over 50,000 rings and will probably take about a year or so to make, right?
 * Tony: Well, so... a mantle it is!
 * Greg: Wise choice, o ambitious one.

---

 * March 15, 2001
 * Greg (about Tony's mech): Wait, you've got live ammo on this thing?! Where did you get the weapons from??
 * Tony: Well, you know how technophobes fear us cause they think we can make weapons of mass destruction out of computer parts?
 * Greg: Yeah...
 * Tony: They're right.

---
 * April 06, 2001
 * [Greg's with his scottish claymore on his back and very upset]
 * Tony: Uh oh... Where are you going with that thing?
 * Greg: I found out that UPS had the shipping address wrong for my chainmail rings. There's only one thing do do in a situation like that.
 * Tony: Yeah, wait a day or two until they deliver it to the right address.
 * Greg: Well, okay... two things. But do you know how long it took me to dig all those shallow graves?

---

 * August 1, 2001
 * Tony: You really think you're going to win with your new cards?
 * Greg: Oh, winning isn't my goal. I just want to see how pissed off I can get Adam before I lose.

---

 * October 19, 2001
 * Liz Mosely: So, what exactly is it that I do as a comic character?
 * Greg: Well, let's see... You'll play video games, drink as much soda as you want, comment on whatever you feel like, go wherever you want, and do as you please.
 * Liz Mosely: Holy cow! There's absolutely no downside to this job!
 * Greg: Well, there is the limited hand mobility, but you'll get used to that.

(This is in reference to Greg's lack of drawing hands. He claims it is a very arduous task to do so in his illustrator program, which is why the characters almost always have their hands in their pockets.)

2002

 * May 20, 2002
 * [Greg is very thirsty. Tony gives him a glass]
 * Tony: Here... Try this out.
 * Greg (after drinking from the glass): Amazing! I'm not thirsty anymore! What do you call this incredible thirst-quenching liquid?!
 * Tony: Water.
 * Greg: Astounding.

---

 * May 21, 2002
 * ''[Greg says he's become addicted to water because he's drinking 8 glasses of water a day, but Tony tells him this is the standard amount recommended]
 * Greg: How am I supposed to live in excess when they set the bar so damned high?

2003

 * February 28, 2003

[Greg is showing off his own brand of bottled water to Dave called "Not Poison"]
 * Dave: "Not Poison". Wow.
 * Greg: See? Instead of worrying about whether or not it's poison, it tells you right on the label!
 * Dave: "Contains no poisons, toxins or other contaminants that other waters don't have." Greg, don't you think this will make people suspicious?
 * Greg: Why would they be suspicious? It says it's not poison, doesn't it?

---

 * March 13, 2003
 * Tony (to Greg): Great. Just great. We got kicked out of our house, an army of my clones is going to take over the world, and we're going to miss tonight's episode of The Daily Show. I don't see how things could possibly get any worse.

 * (Dramatic pause)

 * The Cartoonist: What? Don't go expecting it to start raining or something. I hate those stupid cliches.

---

 * September 9, 2003
 * Cliff: Hey, I drive 1 1/2 hours out to see you. The least you can do is schlepp my ass out to get some damned mongolian BBQ.

---

 * September 24, 2003
 * [Greg has just caught a fly by grabbing it]
 * Greg: I'm pretty sure I should be proud of this, but I have no idea what to do with it now.

---
 * ''October 7, 2003
 * [Regarding a purchased Gameshark]
 * Clerk: Would you like your reputation gift-wrapped, or should I just put it in the bag with your cheating software?''

---
 * October 8, 2003
 * The Cartoonist: If I'm going to spend $400 on one freaking barstool, I want that sucker to be able to withstand a freaking nuclear blast. Because when armageddon befalls us, and cockroaches are left to take over, I want them to have somewhere comfy to park their asses.

---

 * October 15, 2003
 * Dave: What's wrong with your image?
 * Greg: Nothing wrong with it, per se... I just feel like I'm not "intimidating" enough.
 * Dave: Dude, get over it. You couldn't intimidate a chihuahua.

 * [Greg is all dressed in black leather clothes]
 * Dave: You look like a reject from "New Kids On The Block".
 * Greg: Oh yeah? You look like a reject from...from...Shut Up!"

2004

 * January 14, 2004
 * Greg: Where have you been?
 * Tony: Where do you think I've been!? I was stranded in China with no money, no ID, and worst of all, no internet!

---

 * Greg: You know, it would be nice if you were polite enough to at least ask before imposing on me like this. It's really starting to get on my nerves.
 * The Cartoonist: I created the world you exist in. Let's talk about imposing, shall we?
 * Greg (upset): Fine, you win.

---

 * The Cartoonist: Look, I've been trying to steer away from "relationship" jokes for a while, so I could focus on more "Greg being single" material.
 * Greg: So you just did it to laugh at my expense!?
 * The Cartoonist: Uh, Greg, that's kind of your role in the comic. You're a professional "joke-butt".
 * Greg: You know, the want ad never said anything about that...

2005

 * April 21, 2005
 * Tony: Greg, would you take off that ridiculous moustache? The old-days comic was yesterday. You look like an idiot.''
 * Greg: I resent that. I think it makes me look distinguished and respectable ''
 * Tony: No it makes you look like you're going to tie some lady up and put her on some train tracks.''
 * Greg: Well maybe I will then.''
 * Tony: Fine! Go Ahead!''
 * Greg: FINE! I will!''
 * Tony: Fine!! ''
 * Dave: Well, that certainly escalated faster than I would have expected''
 * Tony: Don't worry... I'm moderately certain that Greg won't murder someone to prove a point.''

2006

 * August 14, 2006
 * Liz: I'm spending untold amounts of money on a four year, accredited art school. I work my ass off every day learning the history and ins-and-outs of modern graphic design and every stupid theory that goes along with it and in the real world, some company is probably going to wind up paying me to design a logo made out of a green #"$@! square. [In referance to H&R Block's logo]
 * Greg: But it's so pretty....''

 * August 30, 2006
 * Hobbit: Hi, yeah... I'd like to send this out priority mail, please.''
 * Postal Worker: Certainly. Let's get you started. What's the address?''
 * Hobbit: The Lava, Mount Doom, Mordor, Middle Earth, 45829.''
 * Postal Worker: Is that a business or a residence?''
 * Hobbit: Um... Business, I guess.''
 * Postal Worker: Since it's jewelry, let's go ahead and add some insurance. What's the value?''
 * Hobbit: All the souls of every man, woman and child alive.
 * Postal Worker: Allright, we'll just put "over $500". Would you like to add delivery confirmation?''
 * Hobbit: Hell yes.''
 * [Footnote: Lord of the Rings: The Abridged Version.]

title: Real Life Comics


text:
Carl Levin

Carl Milton Levin ( June 28, 1934 – July 29, 2021) was an American attorney and politician who served as a United States senator from Michigan from 1979 to 2015. A member of the Democratic Party, he was the chair of the Senate Armed Services Committee from 2001 to 2003 and again from 2007 to 2015.

Quotes

 * The war against terrorism will not be finished as long as he [Saddam Hussein] is in power.
 * In an appearance on CNN (December 16, 2001)

title: Carl Levin


text:
User talk:RHL~enwikiquote

This account was apparently created solely for vandalism. It was used to create a personal attack page that has been deleted, and has been permanently blocked. ~ Kalki 08:29, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called RHL. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name RHL~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:33, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:55, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:RHL~enwikiquote


text:
Mommie Dearest (film)

Mommie Dearest is a 1981 biographical drama film about the abusive and traumatic upbringing of Christina Crawford at the hands of her adoptive mother, screen queen Joan Crawford.
 * Directed by Frank Perry. Written by Robert Getchell, Tracy Hotchner, Frank Perry, and Frank Yablans, based on the 1978 autobiography of the same name by Christina Crawford.

To my darling Christina, with love...Mommie Dearest taglines

Joan Crawford

 * NO... WIRE... HANGERS! What's wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you NO WIRE HANGERS, EVER?! I work and work 'til I'm half-dead, and I hear people say, "She's getting old." And what do I get? A daughter... who cares as much about the beautiful dresses I give her... as she cares about me! WHAT'S WIRE HANGERS DOING IN THIS CLOSET?! ANSWER ME! I buy you beautiful dresses, and you treat them like they were some dishrag! You do! $300 dress on a wire hanger? We'll see how many you've got, if they're hidden somewhere!  We'll see! We'll see! Get out of that bed. All of this is coming out! Out...out...out...out!!! You got any more? We're gonna see how many wire hangers you've got in your closet! [throws items out of Christina's closet onto the floor despite Christina's protests, and soon discovers a second dress on a wire hanger] A wi... wire hanger! WHY?! WHY?!!!!  Christina, get out of that bed. Get out of that bed! You live in the most beautiful house in Brentwood... [begins beating Christina with the hanger; Christina tells her to stop hurting her as she shrieks and bawls in pain] ...and you don't care if your clothes get stretched out from wire hangers?! And your room looks like some $2-a-week furnished room in some two-bit back street town in Oklahoma! Get up! Clean up this mess!
 * Note: the phrase "No wire hangers, ever!" is ranked #72 in the American Film Institute's list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema.
 * [addressing the fans camped out in front of her house on Oscar night] I would rather be here with you than anywhere else in the world. You, all of you here and everywhere, gave me this award tonight. And I accept it from you and only you. I love all of you. Now please forgive me, good night.
 * [addressing the men in the Pepsi boardroom] DON'T FUCK WITH ME FELLAS! This ain't my first time at the rodeo. You forget the press that I delivered to Pepsi was MY POWER. I can use it any way I want. It's a sword... that cuts both ways.
 * ''Note: the word "fuck" is redubbed as "mess" in some censored versions
 * TINA! Bring me the axe!
 * You're a lousy substitute for someone who really cares.
 * [yelling at her children for making noise when she is trying to take a nap] Christina, Christopher! DAMMIT!!!
 * [about Christina's refusal to eat her meat] WHY must EVERYTHING be a CONTEST?!

Christina Crawford

 * [lecturing her baby dolls after making Joan mad] You were very, very bad to wake Mommie up like that. VERY naughty. I told you, Mommie has to be beautiful today. This afternoon, she has to see MISTER MAYER. Today is so important. You are thoughtless and selfish. You must learn to think about other people. You are bad, bad spoiled children.
 * Adopted children are luckiest because they were chosen.
 * [in tears, after the "wire hangers"/bathroom cleaning incident] Jesus Christ!

Dialogue

 * Joan: Did you scrub the bathroom floor today? DID YOU?
 * Young Christina: Yes, Mommie.
 * Joan: Yes, Mommie what?
 * Young Christina: Yes, Mommie Dearest.
 * Joan: When I told you to call me that, I wanted you to mean it.

 * Young Christina: [Entering Joan's bedroom after seeing her dolls are missing] My babies! Someone stole both my babies!
 * Joan: That's good, darling. They were thoughtless, selfish, spoiled children - now they won't wake you up when you need your rest.

 * [Joan has just easily beaten Christina in a pool race]
 * Joan: Oh, you lost again.
 * Young Christina: It's not fair. You're bigger than I am, it's not fair to win twice.
 * Joan: AH, but nobody ever said life was fair, Tina. I'm bigger and I'm faster. I will always beat you.
 * Young Christina: Then I'm not gonna play with you anymore. EVER!
 * Joan: Don't you EVER use that tone of voice with me, missy. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO?! I'll tell you what you're gonna do, you're gonna MARCH yourself UPSTAIRS to your room and you will STAY THERE until I tell you to come out.
 * Young Christina: No I won't.
 * Joan: No you won't? Yes... you... WILL! [Spanks Christina's butt two times]
 * Young Christina: OW! OW! I won't go!
 * Joan: All right, all right! [drags Christina to the door of the pool house despite the girl's protests] You will stay in here until you are ready to behave-
 * Christina: I WON’T GO!
 * Joan: And... and to APOLOGIZE!
 * Christina: NO, I WON’T!
 * Joan: IN! [shoves Christina into the pool house and shuts the door]
 * Young Christina: [sobbing, inside the pool house] AAAAAAH, MOMMIE!

 * Joan: [after discovering dirt underneath a large indoor planter] Ohhhh... Helga. When you polish the floor, you have the move the tree. If you can't do something right, don't do it at all.
 * Helga: I'm sorry, Miss Crawford...
 * Joan: Gimmie the soap. You see, Carol Ann, you've got to stay on top of things every single minute. [the doorbell rings] Carol Ann, will you get that?
 * Carol Ann: Yes, Miss Crawford.
 * Joan: Helga, I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at the dirt.

 * [Young Christina has a bloody piece of steak on her lunch plate]
 * Joan: Christina, you haven't touched your lunch.
 * Young Christina: It's raw.
 * Joan: It's rare, not raw.
 * Young Christina: But it's got all this red juice when you push on it.
 * Joan: Then don't push on it. Darling, rare meat is good for you. The doctor said so. Christina, meat loses its vitamins if it's overcooked.
 * Young Christina: But I've had my vitamins this morning. Pills.
 * Joan: [to Carol-Ann] She negotiates everything like a goddamn Hollywood agent. Christina, eat your lunch. You are not getting up from this table until you have finished that meat.

 * Christina: There's a liquor store to the right.
 * Joan: I should've know you'd know where to find the boys and the booze.

 * Joan: Why do you deliberately defy me?
 * Christina: Why did you tell her I got expelled?!
 * Joan: Because you did get expelled.
 * Christina: That... is a lie.
 * Joan: [smacking Christina hard across the face twice] You love it, don't you? YOU LOVE TO MAKE ME HIT YOU!
 * Barbara: Joan!
 * Joan: Barbara, PLEASE! PLEASE, Barbara. Leave us alone, Barbara. If you need anything, ask Carol Ann. [laughs bitterly] This is wonderful. THIS IS WONDERFUL. YOU - You deliberately embarrassed me in front of a REPORTER. A REPORTER. I told you how important this was to me, I TOLD YOU.

 * Joan: I don't know what to do with you.
 * Christina : WHY NOT!?
 * Joan: I don't ask much of you, girl! Why can't you give me the respect that I'm entitled to?! Why can't you treat me... like I would be treated by any STRANGER ON THE STREET?!
 * Christina: Because I am not... one of your FANS!!!

 * Young Christina: [in Joan's room, looking into the mirror, imitating her mother] Oh yes, it was thrilling. So grateful to you all, my wonderful fans, who made me a star. Oh yes, it was thrilling. So grateful to you all, my wonderful fans, who made ME a STAR. [notices her mother standing behind her] ...Mommie!
 * Joan: What do you think you're doing?
 * Young Christina: Nothing. I'm just... I'm just... playing.
 * Joan: What do you mean, "playing"? Are you going through my things? Making fun of me?
 * Young Christina: I wasn't making fun of you. I was just trying to... I was acting, play-acting, like you're always doing.
 * Joan: Look at yourself. [takes a metal hair accessory out of Christina's hair and throws it on the table angrily, and then grabs a hairbrush and begins to frantically try to brush the product out of Christina's hair]

 * [Having failed to brush the setting lotion out of Christina's hair, Joan begins to cut off all of Christina's hair]
 * Young Christina: [crying] Oh, Mommie, I look awful!
 * Joan: I know you look awful! YOU BE QUIET! YOU'RE ALWAYS RUMMAGING THROUGH MY DRAWERS, TRYING TO FIND A WAY TO MAKE PEOPLE LOOK AT YOU! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS LOOKING AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR? WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT? TELL ME! You sit still now! This'll teach you! You're vain, spoiled!
 * Young Christina: [sobbing] Mommie, I can't go to school like this!
 * Joan: I'D RATHER YOU GO BALD TO SCHOOL THAN LOOKING LIKE A TRAMP!
 * Young Christina: No, Mommie, please don't! Mommie, I can't go to school like this...
 * Joan: You spoiled it! Why? YOU SPOILED IT JUST LIKE I SPOILED YOU!

 * Christina: Why did you adopt me?
 * Joan: [surprised] What?
 * Christina: Why did you adopt me?
 * Joan: Because I wanted a child. Because I wanted someone to love.
 * Christina: Don't you act for me. I wanna know. WHY DID YOU ADOPT ME?!
 * Joan : Maybe I did it for a little extra publicity... [realizes what she has just said] Tina! That's not true! You know that's not true.
 * Christina: But maybe just a little true?

 * Joan: You know what's missing in my life?
 * Greg: A hit movie.

 * Joan: [after an ugly fight] I didn't mean that, Greg. I didn't mean it.
 * Greg: Get up. There's no camera in here.
 * Joan: Greg, where ya goin'?
 * Greg: Where I belong. Out of here.
 * Joan: You belong here. I'm waitin' for ya.
 * Greg: Good night, Joan.
 * Joan: Please don't leave, because if you do, you'll never come back in again, no matter what you say, or ask, or do.
 * Greg: I'll always wish you well, Joan. And I'll only speak well of you.
 * Joan: Please don't go! Don't leave me here alone. Please.
 * Greg: If you're acting, you're wasting your time. If you're not, you're wasting mine.
 * Joan: I'm not actin'! I'm not actin'.
 * Greg: Good night. Good luck. Goodbye.

 * Mayer: Joan, my Joan, you're in a position to do me a favor that will be as big a favor for you as it is for me.
 * Joan: You don't have to ask! You only have to tell me.
 * Mayer: Good. I want you to leave Metro.
 * Joan: Leave Metro? Leave Metro?
 * Mayer: Your pictures one after another are losing money. Theater owners voted you "box office poison". Still for years I've paid no attention. You know me, Joan. I don't give up so easily. We'll pay you off on your contract. But you can't afford to make three or four more losers for us.
 * Joan: It's the scripts, L.B. Bad pictures, bad directors...
 * Mayer: Bad with you, good with others.
 * Joan: No, listen to me L.B., I have been BEGGING YOU... begging you for a good script. Now you've always given me my share of bad movies because you knew I'd make them work. Well I can't keep doing it, L.B.!
 * Mayer: Listen with your ears and not with your pride. With me, feeling is more important than money. You're a great star! You're Hollywood royalty! But styles change. You'll leave. We have 'creative differences'. Other studios will think they're smarter than L.B., they'll try to finesse me. You'll be offered two, three, four films. You may even get a hit!
 * Joan: [in tears] Will you be sorry then?
 * Mayer: I'm sorry now. But here there's no feeling, no hope. New faces, new voices, breath of fresh air, who knows. Don't do this to yourself.
 * Joan: I'll have my maid and studio people clear out my bungalow. I've got a lot of years to collect.
 * Mayer: It's done, Joan. They've packed your things, they're loading your car.
 * Joan: You mean everybody already knows?
 * Mayer: That we parted friends because we didn't agree.
 * Joan: Will you walk me to my car? [L.B. doesn't answer] "Hollywood royalty".

 * Carol Ann: [embracing Christina at Joan's funeral] Chris-tina! Tina!
 * Christina: Carol-Ann.
 * Carol Ann: My little Tina. She always loved you so very much, Christina.
 * Christina: I need to believe that. I need so much to be able to believe that now.
 * Carol Ann: She did.

 * Lawyer: [reading from Joan's will after her death] It is my intention to make no provision herein for my son Christopher or my daughter Christina, for reasons which are well known to them.
 * Christopher: What reasons?
 * Christina: [laughing bitterly] Jesus Christ.
 * Christopher: As usual, she has the last word.
 * Christina: Does she? [pause] Does she... ?

Taglines

 * To my darling Christina, with love...Mommie Dearest
 * The meanest mother of them all...
 * Meet the biggest MOTHER of them all!
 * The greatest role of her life...was her life.
 * Faye Dunaway is Joan Crawford, a star...a legend...and a mother...The illusion of perfection.
 * One thing is certain: You'll never look at a wire hanger the same way again!

Cast

 * Faye Dunaway - Joan Crawford
 * Diana Scarwid - Christina Crawford
 * Mara Hobel - young Christina
 * Steve Forrest - Greg Savitt
 * Howard Da silva - Louis B. Mayer
 * Rutanya Alda - Carol Ann
 * Harry Goz - Alfred Steele
 * Michael Edwards - Ted Gelber
 * Jocelyn Brando - Barbara Bennett
 * Priscilla Pointer - Mrs. Chadwick
 * Xander Berkeley - Christopher Crawford
 * Jeremy Scott Reinbolt - young Christopher
 * Carolyn Coates - Mother Superior of Flintridge Sacred Heart
 * Margaret Fairchild - the orphanage's Mother Superior
 * Belita Moreno - Belinda Rosenberg
 * Alice Nunn - Helga

title: Mommie Dearest (film)


text:
User talk:DragonRidr

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title: User talk:DragonRidr


text:
User talk:Jmcalil~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Jmcalil. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Jmcalil~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:27, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
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title: User talk:Jmcalil~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:VicKtHeDic

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title: User talk:VicKtHeDic


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User talk:Rekharani

Welcome
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title: User talk:Rekharani


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User talk:Scrawling

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title: User talk:Scrawling


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User talk:RebelAngel

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title: User talk:RebelAngel


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User talk:Eraflight~enwikiquote

Welcome
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Eraflight. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Eraflight~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:22, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
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title: User talk:Eraflight~enwikiquote


text:
Wikiquote:Votes for deletion archive/Word jokes on proverbs

 * The following discussion is an archived debate of the proposed deletion of the article below. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review).  No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: Delete. — Jeff Q (talk) 09:45, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

Word jokes on proverbs
Patent nonsense, vandalism. I would have requested speedy deletion if the page didn't exist already for over half a year. Gpvos 19:29, 29 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Voting closed. Result: delete (7 deletes; no dissent). ~ Jeff Q (talk) 09:45, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete as per request. Gpvos 19:29, 29 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete as per request.Dashiell 02:33, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. I can't speak to whether this supposed systematic joke, reminiscent in style (if not in interest value) to Cockney rhyming slang, is real, but even if it is, I see no reason for an article that seems like nothing more than a search-and-replace on Dutch proverbs. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 05:45, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. —LrdChaos 15:13, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. - InvisibleSun 16:26, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. per nomination. William Avery 12:25, 10 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. ~ UDScott 18:29, 10 August 2006 (UTC)

 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive of the debate. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review). No further edits should be made to this page.


text:
Wikiquote:Votes for deletion archive/Jim Shapiro

 * The following discussion is an archived debate of the proposed deletion of the article below. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review).  No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: Delete. — Jeff Q (talk) 09:48, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

Jim Shapiro
1. Article at best is advertising or a Vanity page. See also Advertisments

2. Article does not meet this Wikiquote Notable standard: We limit ourselves to quotations which are notable. A quotation can be notable either because it has achieved fame by itself, but more usually because it was said by someone notable, or appeared in a notable work. It does not have potential to meet this standard and become a proper Wikiquote page.

3. Most likely it was created in support of an article currently up for deletion in Wikipedia due to lack of notability of subject.Dashiell 02:30, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

 * I would add that the main "article", Jim Shapiro has been speedy deleted.Jawesq 18:15, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

 * Vote closed. Result: delete (8 deletes; no dissent). ~ Jeff Q (talk) 09:48, 13 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Speedy Delete as per request and in conjuction with the speedy delete on wikipedia.Dashiell 02:34, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete as per nom. Neither the man nor his quotes are notable.   In fact, the article in Wikipedia meets a speedy deletion A6 category, as someone else pointed out.  I suspect this does, as well. Jawesq 02:36, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Speedy delete, also per discussion below. Jawesq 00:40, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete. It appears that speedy delete was passed on at Wikipedia. Even if it were not, I don't think Wikiquote's different policies would support a speedy delete here. I support the nom.65.97.18.237 03:27, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Actually WP:BIO does support speedy deletion.Jawesq 20:23, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

 * Delete . Jim Shapiro must not use the Internet to get business, as this ill-sourced attack page has been around for nearly two years. Our article was created only 1 day after the WP article was created, and the second WP edit was made 3 minutes later to add the WQ box link, strongly suggesting that both article creators are the same person. The sole external link provided in the WQ article appears to be a squirrely personal website with no provenance. (I've listed some details about it in the AfD for the WP article.) All in all, this looks like a set of bad-faith editing by someone with an axe to grind. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 06:16, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Speedy delete, per discussion below. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 21:27, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Comment. I'm the administrator who deleted the Jim Shapiro article from English Wikipedia.  I agree that it all looks like a hatchet job.  --Tony Sidaway 18:25, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Following WP's lead, I've blanked this article as a likely attack page, but following our own practices, I've added a convenient link for review. We could conceivably speedy-delete this, but I'm a bit troubled by the failure to look into an apparently legitimate source for information on this person, a New York Lawyer magazine article titled "Lawyer Known for Ads Suspended" (3 May 2004). However, given the lack of VfD/AfD participation from the original editor, the tide of opinion, and the restricted nature of the source, I suspect we'll end up deleting this article anyway. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 19:05, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Good call. It appears that "New York Lawyer" is an attorney's site of some sort ....if you were to look at my state's similar type of website, I daresay you would find attorneys in the Southeast who have been sanctioned, as well.  Not sure that changes the nature of the attack, since even the last 'version' was poorly sourced.  The fact is that you would not find reputable national sources discussing this individual, because he simply isn't that well known.  Therefore, the only possible purpose in creating a Wiki article is to make him well known, and for being an unsavoury lawyer.  Is this an encyclopedia or a gossip rag?  I do take this personally, even though I do not know this individual.  I am sick to death of finding articles like this on Wikipedia, that are poorly sourced lawyer-bashing.  This, however, is the most clear cut abuse of Wikipedia that I have seen, that falls squarly in WP:BIO of what NOT to do.  Jawesq 20:21, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * The registration process for NYLawyer.com, which looks much like many print publications' website registrations, made me think this was a magazine. I stand corrected by its own words: "New York Lawyer is an online career guide for young lawyers. Backed by the resources and reputation of the 113-year-old New York Law Journal…". I decided to try to resolve this source question to see if there's any reason not to SD this article like WP, but found that its registration process seems to be using an invalid security certificate. My attempts to find a reference to "New York Lawyer" or "nylawyer.com" on the NYLJ website resulted in a number of matches whose excerpts did not include the search term, and whose full content would only be revealed by starting a $300 subscription to NYLJ. As a result, I've changed my mind (see above) — I think there's no reason not to SD this article like WP did. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 21:27, 30 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Yikes!  There are too many TLAs (two and three letter acronyms)!  I have to have Wiki TLA training.  ;-)    I just wish the lawyer bashing in WIkipedia would stop.  Someone said I was treating this as a personal 'crusade'.  WEll, I am an attorney, and I really have a problem with gratuitous lawyer insults.  And this is all that article was about.Jawesq 21:34, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

 * Delete, keep deleted. Non-notable person, nothing notable said by or about him. BD2412 T 03:49, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete, but I'm not sure that any of our formal policies and/or guidelines would permit speedy deletion of this page at present. —LrdChaos 15:12, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * We have an as-yet-unwritten practice, established shortly after an infamous Wikipedia scandal and following their lead (as we often do), of speedy-deleting attack pages against unnotables. (Yet another reason we've got to update our policies.) I'm wavering on using it, though, because (A) blanking the page renders the attack moot, and (B) we now have a deletion review for the WP article. The latter seems exceedingly unlikely to change anything, but one can hardly be blamed for pausing while such a flurry of activity resolves itself. ~ Jeff Q (talk) 15:58, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Thanks for explaining this, Jeff. I wondered what clarification you were referring to in your discussion.  Iit does seem that there should be SD for attack pages on unnotables, and this should be better clarified in Wikipedia as well.Jawesq 16:06, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Wikipedia:Criteria for speedy deletion, Articles, case 6 does cover this, and includes a link to Wikipedia:Biographies of living persons for more information. Our draft policy includes a similar "Attack page" clause, but it is still awaiting final review, discussion, and approval. As far as my "clarification" goes, I'm not sure what you're referring to. (You don't make clear which discussion you're talking about — this one, the WP AfD, or the WP deletion review.) If you mean italicizing of my VfD entry as you cited it in the WP review (and incidental removal of the unmatched "blockquote" end tag), I did that to make it visually clearer that I did not post that edit, so that my subsequent vote didn't look like a second attempt to weigh in on the subject. (Yes, you did say before and after the text that it was copied by you, but visual formatting cues can be very useful to others when reading such a voluminous text as that review entry. Being a lawyer, I suspect you're more adept than most (myself included!) at careful reading of incredibly long texts. ☺ For many editors, such a detailed discussion tends to discourage participation by folks not already involved in the discussion. (I suspect this is a factor in the unusual absence thus far of most of the regular VfD participants in this one. But I must keep my reputation as Wikiquote's most verbose sysop. ☺) ~ Jeff Q (talk) 16:51, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * I have had no problems with any of your edits. I didn't mean clarification of your edit.  I meant a clarification of what was being proposed for the SD...I found it very interesting that you mentioned this.  I'm sorry if I wasn't clear. Maybe I just need to leave all of this alone, since I seem to be stumbling.  :-( Jawesq 20:03, 31 July 2006 (UTC)

 * Delete. - InvisibleSun 16:33, 31 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Comment I suggest now leaving the quotes, since the original deleted article has now been recreated using "James" instead of "Jim" Shapiro, before the deletion review was even completed.  An AFD or speedy delete is apparently meaningless, and not worth the time.  The new "james" Shapiro article in WP is a broader attack on lawyers, and is not specifically an attack on Shapiro, who is used primarily as a bad example.  I suggest that the authors of the Wikiquote and Wikipedia article on Shapiro get the names of their article/quotes (or whatever recreation of those) to link up properly.   I will not participate further, since I am leaving WIkipedia altogether. WIkipedia (I can't speak for here) is probably the worst example of juvenile politics and tabloid 'journalism'  I have ever seen.  I am only surprised there have not been more lawsuits against this group.  The environment is not one in which I have any desire to participate.  Jawesq 16:40, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
 * Delete, per above discussion. ~ UDScott 18:31, 10 August 2006 (UTC)

 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive of the debate. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or in a deletion review). No further edits should be made to this page.