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Spider-Man 3

 is a 2007 American superhero film in which a strange black extraterrestrial from another planet bonds with Peter Parker and causes inner turmoil as he contends with new villains, temptations, and revenge.

 * Directed by Sam Raimi. Written by Sam Raimi, Ivan Raimi, and Alvin Sargent.

How long can any man fight the darkness... before he finds it in himself?taglines

Peter Parker / Spider-Man

 * You want forgiveness? Get religion.

Mary Jane Watson

 * Everybody needs help sometimes, Peter. Even Spider-Man.

Harry Osborn / New Goblin

 * You knew this was coming, Pete.
 * [Last words] None of that matters, Peter. You're my friend.

Eddie Brock, Jr. / Venom

 * Never wound... what you can't kill.
 * I like being bad. It makes me happy.
 * [Last words] Peter! What are you doing?! NO!

Flint Marko / Sandman

 * End of the line, Spider-Man!

Dialogue

 * Harry Osborn: Tell it to my father. Raise him from the dead.
 * Peter Parker: I'm your friend, Harry. I cared about your father.

 * Mary Jane Watson: Tell me again. Was I really good? I was so nervous, my knees were shaking.
 * Peter: Your knees were fine.
 * Mary Jane: The applause wasn't very loud.
 * Peter: Yes, it was. Well, it's the acoustics. It's all about diffusion. It keeps the sound waves from grouping. You see when the sound waves, they propogate, then it–
 * M.J.: You are such a nerd.

 * Emma Marko: You can't hide here, Flint.
 * Flint Marko: I'm just here to see my daughter.
 * Emma Marko: You're an escaped convict. The cops are looking for you. You're not getting near her. You're nothing, but a...convict thief. You maybe even killed a man?
 * Flint Marko: It wasn't like that. Wasn't. I had a good reason for what I was doing. And that's the truth.
 * Emma Marko: You and the truth, sitting in prison, having three meals a day together. I live in the presence of great truth, and that is the truth that you left behind right there in that bedroom. [Their daughter Penny walks out of her bedroom; Flint walks up to her.]
 * Flint: Penny, I missed you.
 * Penny Marko: I miss you too, Daddy.
 * Flint Marko: I promise I'll make you healthy again. Whatever it takes, I'll get the money.
 * Emma: You get out of here now.
 * Flint: [exits through the window] I'm not a bad person. I just had bad luck.

 * Peter: Harry.
 * Harry: You knew this was coming, Pete. [tries to punch at Peter, who quickly moves out of the way, and gets his arm stuck in the wall]
 * Peter: Listen to me! I didn't kill your father! [quickly avoids another punch from Harry] He was trying to kill me! He killed himself!
 * Harry: [yells] Shut up!

 * [Eddie takes a picture of a dangling Gwen with the zoom on his camera]
 * Eddie Brock: Oh my gosh. That's Gwen.
 * Captain Stacy: What? [takes the camera from Eddie, and sees his daughter] What's she doing up there?
 * Eddie: I don't know. I just saw her last night. She said she had a modeling gig.
 * Captain Stacy: Who are you?
 * Brock: It's Brock, sir. Edward Brock Jr. I work at Daily Bugle, and I'm, uh, dating your daughter.

 * Jameson: [grows impatient with Hoffman proposing a new slogan for the Daily Bugle] Get on with it, you moron! [the buzzer on his intercom blares loudly] What?!
 * Brant: Your blood pressure, Mr. Jameson. Your wife told me to tell you to watch the anger.
 * Jameson: [furiously] You tell my wife...! [calmly; pushes his intercom] Thank you.

 * Jameson: [To Eddie] You want a staff job, [to Peter] you want a staff job. Doesn't anybody care about what I want?
 * Hoffman: [briefly entering] I do.
 * Jameson: Shut up. Get out. I want the public to see Spider-Man for the two-bit criminal he really is. He's a fake, he's full of sticcum. Catch him in the act; Spider-Man with his hand in a cookie jar. Whoever brings me that photo gets a job. Well, what are you waiting for? Chinese New Year? Go, go, go!
 * Eddie: I'm on it, boss!
 * Peter: [after they both leave Jameson's office] You'll never get that shot.
 * Eddie: Oh, we'll see.

 * Spider-Man: Jig's up, pal.
 * Sandman: I don't wanna hurt you. Leave, now.
 * Spider-Man: I guess you haven't heard. I'm the sheriff around these parts.
 * Sandman: Okay.
 * [fight ensues, however Sandman easily beats Spider-Man, before saving two man, as Sandman sees and flees]
 * Spider-Man: Where do all these guys come from?

 * Peter: Okay, I'm fine. I-I don't need your help.
 * M.J.: Everybody needs help sometimes, Peter, even Spider-Man.

 * Peter: What do you think?
 * Dr. Connors: I've never seen anything like it. I'm a physicist, not a biologist, but I'll look at it in the morning and run some tests.
 * Peter: Can we do that now?
 * Connors: [The specimen being looked at escapes and starts moving towards Peter who, surprised, traps it in a glass] Seems to like you. Don't let any of that get on you.
 * Peter: Why not?
 * Connors: It has the characteristics of a symbiote, which needs to bond to a host to survive. And sometimes, these things in nature, when they bind, they can be hard to unbind.

 * Eddie: Whoa. Buddy, love the new outfit. This is exactly what I need to scoop Parker. Give me uh...give me some of that web action. [Spider-Man's web swing crushes Eddie's camera]
 * Spider-Man: See ya, chump. [jumps into sewers to face Sandman]
 * Eddie: What the hell?! [gets another camera from his coat, taking photos, as police arrives]
 * Spider-Man: Flint Marko.
 * Sandman: What do you want from me?
 * Spider-Man: [playful to aggressive] Remember Ben Parker? THE OLD MAN YOU SHOT DOWN IN COLD BLOOD?!
 * Sandman: [visibly upset by the question and responds] WHAT DOES IT MATTER TO YOU, ANYWAY?!
 * Spider-Man: [going over the passing train and yells] EVERYTHING!!!

 * [after defeating Sandman in the sewers; Peter enters the apartment, nervous]
 * Mr. Ditkovich: Rent!
 * Peter: Not now.
 * Mr. Ditkovich: This is a free country, not a rent-free country.
 * Peter: [heads to the door] Leave me alone.
 * Mr. Ditkovich: Just give me rent.
 * Peter: You'll get your rent when you fix this damn door!
 * [Mr. Ditkovitch feels shocked at Peter's words, Peter manages to get the door open and walks inside.]
 * Ursula: That wasn't cool.
 * Mr. Ditkovich: He's a good boy. He must be in some kind of trouble.

 * [after regaining his memories, Harry meets the spirit of his father, Norman]
 * Norman Osborn: Harry. Remember me?
 * Harry Osborn: Yes, Father. I remember.
 * Norman: I was right about her. About Peter. About everything.
 * Green Goblin: [offscreen] You know what you must do. Make him suffer. Make him wish he were dead. First, we attack his heart!

 * Mr. Ditkovich: Having trouble with the phone?
 * Peter: No, no. I was just trying to figure out what to say.
 * Mr. Ditkovich: If it is woman you are calling then you say "You are a good woman. I am good man." Hm?

 * Harry: [when dark Peter arrives at his mansion] Would you like a drink? Tsk, I'm sorry. What was I thinking? Bad for the public image, right, Mr. Key to the City?
 * Peter: What did you do to her?
 * Harry: I did what you failed to do. I was there for her. Mary Jane and I, we understand each other.
 * Peter: She doesn't know what you are.
 * Harry: Peter, she knows me very well. And when she kissed me, it was just like she used to kiss me. The taste... [sucks in, rolls fingertips over his lips] ...Strawberries.
 * [Peter punches him, the battle ensues.]
 * Harry: How ya like that, Spidey?
 * Peter: That all you got?
 * Peter: [after kicking Harry through a window] Stings, doesn't it?
 * Harry: I protected you in high school, now I'm gonna kick your little ass.
 * Peter: [mockingly] Ooh!
 * Harry: [after getting hit in the face with his glider and accidentally getting thrown by Peter at a glass shelf full of pumpkin bombs] You gonna kill me like you killed my father?
 * Peter: I'm done trying to convince you.
 * Harry: You took him from me. He loved me.
 * Peter: No. He despised you. You were an embarrassment to him. [sees tears in Harry's eyes] Oh, look at little Goblin Jr. Gonna cry? [Harry roars in fury, and lunges at Peter, but Peter knocks Harry unconscious into the wall shelf and walks away. Harry tries to throw a pumpkin bomb at Peter, but Peter throws it back at Harry's face, disfiguring it.]

 * Eddie: [to dark Peter, during his promotion party in his staff position] Well, good morning. It's a beautiful day, huh? What was that you said? I'd never get that picture? [points to his picture of Spider-Man robbing a bank] There's your hero.
 * Peter: Huh. I never thought he'd really do that!
 * Eddie: See? Right there. You made a judgment call. You gotta see it as it is.
 * Peter: It's funny you should say that, because I was looking through some old photos and it looks very, uh... [straightens his collar] similar.
 * Eddie: [chuckling] Okay. Well, I gotta get back to work.
 * Peter: You're trash, Brock.
 * Eddie: Excuse me?
 * Peter: [hurling original picture with Brock's re-edit] Your picture's a fake''.
 * Eddie: Parker, you are such a boy scout. When are you gonna give a guy a break?
 * Peter: [angrily shoves him against the picture shattering the glass which attracts the attention of everyone in the room] You want forgiveness? Get religion.
 * Robbie Robertson: What's going on here?
 * Betty Brant: Are you guys alright?
 * Eddie: [fake chuckling] Yeah, we're just horsing around. [quietly to Peter] Look, I'm begging you: if you do this, I will lose everything. There's not a paper in town that will hire me.
 * Peter: You should've thought of that earlier. [lets go of Eddie and walks towards Robbie]
 * Robbie: What are you doing, Peter?
 * Peter: [hands photos to Robbie] Show this to your editor. Tell him to check his source next time.
 * [As Peter leaves, Robbie and Betty look at the photos and back at Eddie realizing the photo is fake. Later in Jameson's office, Jameson looks at the fake photo Brock made and the original he faked it from]
 * Robbie: [To Jameson] It's a fake. Empire State Photographic Department confirms it.
 * Jameson: [Jameson turns to Brock slamming the photos on his desk; angrily] Pack your things. Get out of my building.
 * Eddie: I was just–
 * Jameson: You're fired!
 * Robbie: [To Jameson, as Eddie leaves] You know we're gonna have to print a retraction now.
 * Jameson: I haven't printed a retraction in twenty years!

 * Betty: Your shots are so good.
 * Peter: I'd love to shoot you sometime.
 * Brant: [aroused] Peter Parker. Peter...
 * Jameson: Parker! Miss Brant, that's not the position I hired you for.
 * Robertson: [drops some Spider-Man photos on the table] Black-suit Spider-Man. Peter, these are incredible! We gotta have these, Jonah.
 * Jameson: I'll pay you the usual rate.
 * Peter: If you want the shots, I'll take the staff job. Double the money.

 * Jazz Club Manager: Are you alright, Mary Jane?
 * M.J.: I'm fine.
 * Jazz Club Manager: Okay.
 * Peter: Hey.
 * M.J.: What's wrong with you?
 * Peter Parker: You.
 * Jazz Club Manager: Can I help you sir?
 * Peter: No.
 * Jazz Club Bouncer: Everything okay here Paul?
 * Peter: Yeah, everything okay here Paul?
 * Manager: Take him out of here.
 * Bouncer: [grabbing Peter's shoulder gently] Let's go sir.
 * Peter: Take your hand off me.
 * Jazz Club Bouncer: [grabbing Peter's arm tight] Now.
 * Peter: [angrily fights the Jazz Club Bouncer and punches a few people]
 * M.J.: Peter, stop it--! [Peter thinks she's another bouncer and angrily screams and hits Mary Jane in the face causing her to fall to the ground; Peter's face turns from rageful to shocked and remorseful at what he's just done; tearfully, to Peter] Who are you?
 * Peter: I don't know. [reveals his black suit in his dress suit to Mary Jane but he covers it and leaves the jazz club out of guilt]

 * Flint: [grabs Venom in mid-swing, thinking he's Spider-Man] End of the line, Spider-Man. [Venom screeches in his face; Flint sees it's not Spider-Man, tosses him aside]
 * Venom: I want him dead too, Flint. That's why I've been looking for you. Oh yeah, I know all about you. Like the fact that Spider-Man... [reveals his identity] ...Won't let you help your poor daughter. That just doesn't seem right to me. Look, I want to kill the Spider, you want to kill the Spider... together, he doesn't stand a chance. [turns back into Venom] Interested?
 * Flint: Yeah.

 * ''[MJ gets in the cab and the driver, revealed to be Eddie Brock]
 * Eddie: So, where to? [uses Venom's arm to place against MJ's face upon kidnapping her]

 * Spider-Man: Harry, I need your help. I can't take them both, not by myself.
 * Harry: [shows disfiguration on half of his face] You don't deserve my help.
 * Spider-Man: Harry, she needs us.
 * Harry: Get out.
 * Bernard: [to Harry, upon his refusal to aid Peter] If I may, sir. I've seen things in this house I've never spoke of.
 * Harry: What are you trying to tell me?
 * Bernard: The night your father died, I... I cleaned his wound. The blade that pierced his body came from his Glider. I-I know you're trying to defend your father's honor, but there is no question that he died by his own hand. I loved your father, as I've loved you, Harry. As your friends love you.

 * Mary Jane: Peter! They're gonna kill us both.
 * Spider-Man: I'm gonna get you out of this.
 * Mary Jane: Watch out!!
 * Eddie Brock: Hey, Parker.
 * Spider-Man: My God, Eddie!
 * Eddie Brock: Ooh, my Spider-Sense's tingling. [grabbing Mary Jane] If you know what I'm talking about. [knocks Spider-Man down into a black web and binds his wrists to it]
 * Peter Parker: We can find a way to settle this.
 * Eddie Brock: You're so right. I'm thinking humiliation. Kinda like how you humiliated me. Do you remember? Do you remember what you did to me? You made me lose my girl. Now I'm gonna make you lose yours. How's that sound, tiger?

 * Spider-Man: You came.
 * Harry Osborn: Looks like just in the nick of time.
 * Spider-Man: A couple minutes ago wouldn't have been so bad either.
 * Harry Osborn: What're you gonna do?
 * [Venom screeches as both Spider-Man and Harry turning around at Venom and Sandman, respectively]
 * Spider-Man: I may need some help over here!
 * Harry Osborn: I'm a little busy right now! Give me your hand!

 * Jameson: [witnessing the battle between Spider-Man, Venom, Sandman and Goblin; searching for Parker] Parker! Parker, where–? I need a photographer. [notices a little girl with a camera beside him] Hey kid, want a job?
 * Little Girl: Why would I want a job? I'm just a kid.
 * Jameson: Alright, how much for the camera?
 * Little Girl: $100!
 * Jameson: $100?! Alright, you little crook, here. [buys the little girl's camera, gives his money to her and clicks the camera, but it doesn't seem to work] What the–? [opens the camera to find that there's no film in it, and looks back at the little girl]
 * Little Girl: The film's extra. [Jameson reaches for his wallet and snarls at her.]

 * Eddie Brock: Never wound... [Eddie's face revealed] what you can't kill.
 * Peter: Eddie, the suit! You gotta take it off!
 * Eddie Brock: Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?
 * Peter: I know what it feels like. It feels good, the power, everything, but you'll lose yourself. Let it go.
 * [The suit slowly grasps Venom's face, as if holding onto him]
 * Eddie Brock: I like being bad. It makes me happy. [The suit covers his face at once, as he prepares to deliver a fatal blow]

 * [He activates a pumpkin grenade from Harry's glider to finish the symbiote]
 * Eddie Brock: Peter! What are you doing?! [Peter hurls the pumpkin grenade at the symbiote, much to Eddie's horror] NO! [Eddie jumps in to save the symbiote]
 * Peter Parker: Eddie!!! [Runs to stop Eddie, but the pumpkin grenade explodes, killing Eddie and destroying the symbiote]
 * [Sandman was too late to aid Venom after Spider-Man kills him]
 * Mary Jane: Harry.
 * Harry: Mary Jane.
 * Mary Jane: I'm gonna get help.
 * Harry: No. Stay.
 * Sandman: [To Peter, after discovering he's Spider-Man] I didn't want this. But I had no choice.
 * Peter Parker: [glares] We always have a choice. You had a choice when you killed my uncle.
 * Sandman: My daughter was dying. I needed money. I was scared. I told your uncle all I wanted was the car. And he said to me, "Why don't you just put down the gun and go home?" I realize now he was just trying to help me. Then I saw my partner running over with the cash, and the gun was in my hand. Did a terrible thing to you. I spent a lot of nights wishing I could take it back. I'm not asking you to forgive me. I just want you to understand.
 * Peter Parker: I've done terrible things too.
 * Sandman: [looking down at the police cars and people cheering below] I didn't choose to be this. [looks at his locket] The only thing left in me now... is my daughter.
 * Peter Parker: I forgive you.
 * [Touched, Sandman turns into sand and peacefully flies away through the city; Peter approaches MJ and injured Harry.]
 * Peter Parker: Hi, pal. How you doing?
 * Harry: Been better.
 * Peter Parker: We'll get you through this.
 * Harry: No.
 * Peter Parker: I should never have hurt you. Said those things.
 * Harry: None of that matters, Peter. You're my friend.
 * Peter Parker: Best friend. [Harry then succumbs]

 * Peter Parker: [narrating] Whatever comes our way... whatever battle is raging inside us, we always have a choice. My friend Harry taught me that. He chose to be the best of himself. It's the choices that make us what we are... and we can always choose to do what's right.

Editor's Cut

 * [Alternate cut of Harry's Mansion scene.]
 * Harry: What took you so long? [turns to find Peter just casually chilling on the couch]
 * Peter: That was quite a performance today.
 * Harry: [chuckles] Well, it wasn't all a show. She did come to me.
 * Peter: [rises up from the couch] Oh, yeah, I got the story. I'm really gonna enjoy this.
 * Harry: Not as much as I enjoyed it when Mary Jane kissed me.

 * Sandman: [watches his daughter walk away with her mother from a park] I promise you. He won't stop me again.

 * Peter: Ursula, hey, listen, about earlier...
 * Ursula: Don't worry about it, you're a good boy.
 * Peter: Thanks.

Taglines

 * How long can any man fight the darkness... before he finds it in himself?
 * The battle within.
 * Every hero has a choice, to face the darkness... or be consumed by it.

About Spider-Man 3

 * Spider-Man 3 took a lot of flack - it was a bigger, more convoluted story with maybe one too many villains, and it went a bit dark for some. Still, for me, it's hard to put in words how delighted I was to watch Sam (Raimi), my boyhood buddy and filmmaking fraternal brother, direct one of the most successful movie franchises in history. There were superhero movies before Spider-Man, but Sam's series truly set that particular genre in motion for decades to come. I'm not a film historian, but I sense that Spider-Man also represents a turning of the tide, or taste, where even A-list movies are now B-movies conceptually. Believe me, if your hero is bitten by a radioactive spider and starts webslinging from buildings, that's not only a B-movie - that's a 1950s B-movie. I'm just happy that genre fare is no longer frowned upon in the world of entertainment, and that we're finally seeing how popular fantasy, horror and sci-fi stories really are.
 * Bruce Campbell, from his memoir Hail to the Chin: Further Confessions of a B-Movie Actor.
 * I think that Topher’s character is ultimately a very tragic character because when he hurls himself back just before the explosion I loved the way that he did that. It just gave me goose bumps. Topher just manages to capture in that one kind of flash of performance that this guy has nothing else. He’s only existed in the movie by superficiality and duplicity and then of course embraces the black suit and turns into Venom, but whenever he’s torn apart that’s all he has. He has no other choice, but to really commit himself suicidally because he just has nothing else. He has no other path. I find that to be resolute in it’s tragedy with it’s character. I think that my character certainly starts off in a place emotionally which addresses the worst fear of any parent, the possibility that you’ll lose your greatest gift which is your child. I’m a father and Sam is a father and Laura and Alvin are parents, Avi is a parent, everyone involved â€“ early on that’s what we wanted the anchoring of the character to be. It was that kind of impending tragedy with the character. You’re right though, he’s sympathetic and certainly some clicks beyond Eddie Brock and Venom, but I think that as Avi has said before there are no bad guys in these movies. They’re just people that this far into the series, I think, come into these movies with a value system in tact that’s corrupted by ambition or lust. In the case of Sandman he’s really corrupted by the ferocity of his own good intentions. You’ve got to pretty much figure that whenever I become a sand tornado and I’m spinning through the streets of Manhattan and flipping over cars some people probably got f**ked up. That’s probably a drag and they don’t care if my daughter is dying because their car got turned upside down, their Hyundai Excel. They don’t even see the hidden benefit that insurance pays and they get another car.
 * Thomas Haden Church, "Spider-Man 3 Interviews: Thomas Haden Church", Super Hero Hype, (April 22, 2007).
 * The great failing of "Spider-Man 3" is that it failed to distract me from what a sap Peter Parker is. It lingers so long over the dopey romance between Peter and the long-suffering Mary Jane that I found myself asking the question: Could a whole movie about the relationship between these two twentysomethings be made? And my answer was: No, because today's audiences would never accept a hero so clueless and a heroine so docile. And isn't it a little unusual to propose marriage after sharing only one kiss, and that one in the previous movie, and upside-down?
 * And what's with Mary Jane? Here's a beautiful, (somewhat) talented actress good enough to star in a Broadway musical, and she has to put up with being trapped in a taxi suspended 80 stories in the air by alien spider webs. The unique quality of the classic comic books was that their teenagers had ordinary adolescent angst and insecurity. But if you are still dangling in taxicabs at age 20, you're a slow learner. If there is a "Spider-Man 4" (and there will be), how about giving Peter and Mary Jane at least the emotional complexity of soap opera characters? If "Juno" (opening Dec. 14) met Peter Parker, she'd have him for breakfast. Superhero movies and Bond movies live and die by their villains. Spidey No. 2 had the superb Doc Ock (Alfred Molina), who is right up there with Goldfinger and the Joker in the Supervillain Hall of Infamy. He had a personality. In Spidey No. 3 we have too many villains, too little infamy. Take the Sandman (Thomas Haden Church). As an escaped con and the murderer of Uncle Ben, he has marginal interest at best. As the Sandman, he is absurd. Recall Doc Ock climbing buildings with his fearsome mechanical tentacles and now look at this dust storm. He forms from heaps of sand into a creature that looks like a snowman left standing too late in the season. He can have holes blown into him with handguns, but then somehow regains the bodily integrity to hammer buildings. And how does he feel in there? Molina always let you know precisely how Doc Ock felt, with a vengeance.
 * We know that Spider-Man's powers do not reside in his red suit, which lies in a suitcase under his bed. So how do fake Spideys like Venom gain their powers when they are covered with the black substance? And how does a microorganism from outer space know how to replicate the intricate patternwork of the Spidey costume, right down to the chest decoration? And to what purpose from an evolutionary point of view? And what good luck that the microorganism gets Peter's rival photographer, Eddie Grace, to infect, so that he becomes Venom! And how does Eddie know who he has become?
 * "Spider-Man 3" is, in short, a mess. Too many villains, too many pale plot strands, too many romantic misunderstandings, too many conversations, too many street crowds looking high into the air and shouting "oooh!" this way, then swiveling and shouting "aaah!" that way. And saints deliver us from another dinner date like the one where Peter plans to propose to Mary Jane. You know a movie is in trouble when the climactic romantic scene of the entire series is stolen by the waiter (Bruce Campbell).
 * Roger Ebert, "Spider-Man 3", Rogerebert.com, (November 15, 2007).

 * Yeah, I think there are 2 kinds of origins to Eddie Brock. There’s one where he’s more of Peter’s peer which is ultimate Spiderman and there’s one that’s a little muddled it’s kind of told in the flashback which is the original origin. So I guess what I really brought to it was kind of a fear at the beginning that I shared with Sam which is I don’t think I’m the right guy to really play this role. In the original comic book he’s like 40 and really muscle-bound and I had to work out for 6 months. I could never get to where he was in the comic book but then what Sam described to me is he wanted to take the best of both worlds approach and kind of make him this evil twin brother of Peter Parker who’s basically a case study and if someone similar, you know if they have the same job and they’re after the same girl. Even Eddie kind of has the edge even though they’re similar. He’s a better dresser and clearly has more money and kind of a better flirt. If they both received the same power and one of those 2 people didn’t have someone like Uncle Ben like a mentor to say you have to take responsibility for this power how would that turn out? Even Peter used it for personal gain originally. What’s great about Eddie is that even though he’s really slick he kind of hides a really hollow interior. Like he’s got a really great exterior, he’s got nothing inside, whereas Peter’s just the opposite. He might not have his whole act together but his core is very strong and that’s why he’s able to kind of shed this power but Eddie totally embraces it.
 * Topher Grace, "Topher Grace Interviewed – Spider-Man 3", Steve 'Frosty' Weintraub, Collider, (April 22, 2007).
 * SHH!: Sam said Spidey needed to learn he was a sinner, did you appreciate those spiritual characteristics coming out in this film?
 * Maguire: Well I guess if you are talking about the imagery you should talk to Sam or Bill Pope, the cinematographer. For me, in my department, I wasn’t thinking of it in those terms really. There is definitely deep remorse from Peter’s part. I think he feels like he lost his way and he’s really remorseful and wants toâ€¦and feels really humbled and wants to stop behaving in that way. It’s difficult for him, it’s emotional. I think about it from the character’s perspective and not really in religious terms. It’s more about psychological and emotional terms that I’m think.
 * Tobey Maguire, "Spider-Man 3 Interviews: Tobey Maguire", Super Hero Hype, (Apr 22, 2007).
 * Wild About Movies: So how did you get to the two villains?
 * Raimi: So we decided that’s the journey Peter Parker has to go on. Then we said, what villain will best represent the conflict that can dramatize his journey? If the hero runs into this conflict, how can he learn forgiveness? We’ll make the villain piece someone who is absolutely unforgivable in Peter’s eyes to really take him to a place where the audience understands his desire for vengeance and they feel it so that the kids will think ‘Yes, bring the Sandman down, Spider-Man.’ And then by the end of the piece, you want the kids to go on this journey with Spider-Man so that they’d say, ‘No, actually as my hero, the best thing that you could do right now, the thing I’d rather have you do is forgive this man.’ We thought that would be a worthwhile summer picture and a good story for the kids if we could incorporate that.

 * Wild About Movies: You seemed to have a lot of fun with Peter Parker embracing his darker side. Can you talk about creating that aspect of the movie?
 * Sam Raimi: Well, in this story, Peter Parker falls victim to his own pride. He starts to believe all the press clippings about himself, that he’s really this hero and somebody great. He starts to be afraid that he isn’t that person and doesn’t want to act any other way than the person that’s right. That pride manifests itself in a much darker way. Working on those sequences with Tobey Maguire and the dark Spider-Man, that was a difficult thing for me actually. It wasn’t fun for me because I didn’t like those sequences. I don’t like watching Spider-Man go bad. It was unpleasant and I kept worrying, ‘Gee, do I really have to do this to show how rageful and vengeful he is? Do we really have to show how pride can destroy you?’ But, my brother kept telling me, ‘Yes, because he’s going to find himself again after he loses himself.’
 * Sam Raimi, "Sam Raimi Interview Spiderman 3", Wild About Movies.

Cast

 * Tobey Maguire – Peter Parker / Spider-Man
 * Kirsten Dunst – Mary Jane "M.J." Watson
 * James Franco – Harry Osborn / New Goblin
 * Thomas Haden Church – Flint Marko / Sandman
 * Topher Grace – Eddie Brock, Jr. / Venom
 * Bryce Dallas Howard – Gwen Stacy
 * Rosemary Harris – May Parker
 * Dylan Baker – Dr. Curt Connors
 * J. K. Simmons – J. Jonah Jameson
 * James Cromwell – Captain George Stacy
 * Theresa Russell – Emma Marko
 * Elizabeth Banks – Betty Brant
 * Cliff Robertson – Benjamin "Ben" Parker
 * Willem Dafoe – Norman Osborn / Green Goblin

 * Stan Lee and many others have made cameos in this film.

title: Spider-Man 3


text:
User talk:71.201.116.120

- InvisibleSun 02:56, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: User talk:71.201.116.120


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She Loves Me

She Loves Me is a Broadway musical about two employees of a small Budapest shop who are constantly at odds with each other at work, unaware that each is the other's secret pen pal.

Amalia Balash

 * Where'd you put my shoe? That's a sneaky thing to do? You don't want me go, do you? I can see right through you!

title: She Loves Me


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User talk:12.167.200.173

- InvisibleSun 03:07, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:12.167.200.173


text:
User talk:24.47.37.128

- InvisibleSun 03:30, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:24.47.37.128


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Talk:Lenny Bruce

Unsourced
Wikiquote no longer allows unsourced quotations, and they are in process of being removed from our pages (see Wikiquote:Limits on quotations); but if you can provide a reliable and precise source for any quote on this list please move it to.

 * My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. One day my wife came home and found us in bed together.

 * The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it...try to fake three laughs in an hour--ha ha ha ha ha--they'll take you away, man.  You can't.

 * If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish.

 * If you're going to stop masturbating, you can't "taper off." You've got to quit, cold jerky!

 * A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" I dunno... it was one of those parties that got out of hand, you know?

 * Since they condone capital punishment, I want them to stop bitching about Jesus getting nailed up.

 * If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.

 * Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.

 * If white America told the truth for one day, its whole world would fall apart.

 * I didn't do it, man, I only said it.
 * - To police on the occasion of his arrest for saying "cocksucker" at San Francisco's Jazz Workshop, 1961

 * A knowledge of syphilis is not an instruction to get it.

 * "Sex" and "obscenity" are not synonymous.

 * Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.

 * The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.

 * I'm sorry if I wasn't very funny tonight. Sometimes I'm not. I'm not a comedian. I'm Lenny Bruce.

 * The "what should be" never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no "what should be," there is only what is.

 * Communism is like one big phone company. If you get too rank with them, you'll wind up with a dixie cup and a thread.

 * There are never enough "I love you's."

 * I want the Supreme Court to stand up and tell me that fucking is dirty and no good.

 * I want to help you if you have a dirty word problem. There are none.

 * I don't want every break in the world. I just want justice.

 * If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.

 * If there was absolute freedom, people would run over babies and charge admission.

 * We Jews killed Christ.And if he comes back,we'll kill him again.

Dixie Cup
I don't know of a recording where Bruce compares the phone company to Communism. However, on the posthumous album "The Lenny Bruce Originals Vol. 2" is a recording, "The Phone Company," where Bruce says "I really don't dig the phone company anyway. It's a monopoly. If you get too hot with the phone company, you'll end up with a Dixie cup and a thread!"

title: Talk:Lenny Bruce


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User:Angelo1960

--Angelo1960 06:03, 12 December 2006 (UTC) At love's first blush...the soul smiles.  Angelo1960

title: User:Angelo1960


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User talk:66.68.98.152

Please do not put your personal opinions into our articles. Also your test edits have been removed. jni 07:42, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:66.68.98.152


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Wikiquote:Year pages/1921

In the year 1921:

 * G. K. Chesterton wrote Child Psychology and Nonsense.
 * There are two ways of dealing with nonsense in this world. One way is to put nonsense in the right place; as when people put nonsense into nursery rhymes. The other is to put nonsense in the wrong place; as when they put it into educational addresses, psychological criticisms, and complaints against nursery rhymes or other normal amusements of mankind. ~ G. K. Chesterton

 * Chittaranjan Das was leading the Indian non-cooperation movement in Bengal.
 * We stand then for freedom, because we claim the right to develop our own individuality and evolve our own destiny along our own lines, unembarrassed by what Western civilisation has to teach us and unhampered by the institutions which the West has imposed. ~ Chittaranjan Das

 * Warren G. Harding was inaugurated as President of the United States.
 * Our supreme task is the resumption of our onward, normal way. Reconstruction, readjustment, restoration all these must follow. I would like to hasten them. ~ Warren G. Harding

 * Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. decided cases on the United States Supreme Court.
 * [A] page of history is worth a volume of logic. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

 * H. P. Lovecraft wrote The Crawling Chaos.
 * I took opium but once — in the year of the plague, when doctors sought to deaden the agonies they could not cure. There was an overdose — my physician was worn out with horror and exertion — and I travelled very far indeed. In the end I returned and lived, but my nights are filled with strange memories, nor have I ever permitted a doctor to give me opium again. ~ H. P. Lovecraft

 * William McFee wrote The Market.
 * London is always beautiful to those who love and understand that extraordinary microcosm; but at five of a summer morning there is about her an exquisite quality of youthful fragrance and debonair freshness which goes to the heart. ~ William McFee

 * Bertrand Russell wrote The Analysis of Mind.
 * There is no logical impossibility in the hypothesis that the world sprang into being five minutes ago, exactly as it then was, with a population that "remembered" a wholly unreal past. There is no logically necessary connection between events at different times; therefore nothing that is happening now or will happen in the future can disprove the hypothesis that the world began five minutes ago. ~ Bertrand Russell

 * Margaret Sanger campaigned for birth control.
 * The campaign for birth control is not merely of eugenic value, but is practically identical with the final aims of eugenics. ~ Margaret Sanger

 * David Sarnoff tried to raise money to develop commercial radio.
 * The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to no one in particular? ~ Business associates of David Sarnoff

 * William Carlos Williams published Sour Grapes.
 * Among the rain and lights I saw the figure 5 in gold on a red firetruck moving tense unheeded to gong clangs siren howls and wheels rumbling through the dark city. ~ "The Great Figure" by William Carlos Williams

Births

 * Murray Bookchin, January 14
 * Betty Friedan, February 4
 * Lloyd Bentsen, February 11
 * Sir Peter Ustinov, April 16
 * Andrei Sakharov, May 21
 * Caryl Chessman, May 27
 * Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, June 10
 * Nancy Reagan, July 6
 * Peter Benenson, July 31
 * Alex Haley, August 11
 * Gene Roddenberry, August 19
 * Harry Secombe, September 8
 * Stanisław Lem, September 12
 * Jesse Helms, October 18
 * Rodney Dangerfield, November 22
 * Steve Allen, December 26

Deaths

 * Peter Kropotkin, February 8
 * Subramanya Bharathy, September 11
 * `Abdu'l-Bahá, November 28

title: Wikiquote:Year pages/1921


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User talk:62.171.194.37

Thanks for experimenting with Wikiquote. Your test worked, and has now been reverted or removed. Please use Sandbox for any other tests you want to do, since testing in articles will normally be reverted quickly. Please see the welcome page if you would like to learn more about contributing to our compendium of quotations. Thanks. Fys. “Ta fys aym”. 12:30, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

~ UDScott 12:31, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

title: User talk:62.171.194.37


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User talk:Fatben0772~enwikiquote

Fat Ben aka Ben Hill
Fat Ben was born Benjamin Richard Hill. Among his acomplishments in his life, Ben was 1st team all confrence, and all area weighing only 183 lbs, for a football team that was the best the school has ever seen. Another thing Ben acomplished is being one of the 1st Cisco Network Academy Students in his school. Ben not just limiting him self to just sports and computers, has made a big contribution to the music industry by releasing some of his own music that he makes in his spear time including Super Fattning, Life-Style Broke, Slobb on my Knobb, and the ever popular Tell Me When It's Lunch. In the High School that Ben attends, he is knowned by all the teachers by that kid who fixes computers and playes music down the halls, and to some, the Renasonce Man.

Welcome
Hi. Welcome to English Wikiquote. Enjoy! —LrdChaos (talk) 16:02, 12 December 2006 (UTC)
 * For a quick overview of what Wikiquote is, read Wikiquote.
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Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Fatben0772. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Fatben0772~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:22, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:47, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Fatben0772~enwikiquote


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Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Season 4

 * Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 | Main

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997–2003), created by Joss Whedon, was a television series about Buffy Summers, a teenage girl chosen by fate to battle against vampires, demons, and other supernatural foes. She is often aided by her Watcher and her circle of misfit friends. Season 4 aired on The WB from 1999 to 2000.

The Freshman

 * Buffy: [about college] It's nice that you're excited.
 * Willow: It's just that in High School, knowledge was pretty much frowned upon, you really had to work to learn anything. But here... the energy, the collective intelligence, it's like this force. This penetrating force.. and I can just feel my mind opening up, you know, and letting this place just thrust into and spurt knowledge into... [considers what she's saying] That sentence ended up in a different place than it started out in.

 * Willow: [spots Oz] Ooh, boyfriend! It's my on campus boyfriend!
 * Buffy: Oh no, I forgot to pick mine up, the line's probably really long now too.

 * Buffy: You saw the Grand Canyon?
 * Xander: Well, I saw the movie Grand Canyon, on cable. Really lame.
 * Buffy: Huh?
 * Xander: Basically, I got as far as Oxnard and the engine fell out of my car, and that was literally. So I ended up washing dishes at the fabulous "Ladies Night" club for about a month and a half while I tried to pay for the repairs. Nobody really bothered me, or even spoke to me, until one night, when one of the male strippers called in sick, and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say, I traded my car in for one that wasn't entirely made of rust, came trundling back home to the arms of my loving parents, where everything is exactly as it was, except I sleep in the basement and I have to pay rent. How's college?
 * Buffy: Male strippers?
 * Xander: No power on this earth!

 * Xander: Buffy, this is all about fear. It's understandable, but you can't let it control you. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to anger. - No, wait, hold on. - Fear leads to hate. Hate leads to the dark side. - Hold on, no. Ahm... First you get the women, then you get the money, then you... - OK, can we forget that?
 * Buffy: Thanks for Dadaist pep talk. I feel much more abstract now.
 * Xander: The point is, you're Buffy.
 * Buffy: Yeah. Maybe in high school I was Buffy.
 * Xander: And now in college you're Betty Louise?
 * Buffy: Yeah, I'm Betty Louise Plotnick of East Cupcake, Illinois. I might as well be.
 * Xander: [...] Let me tell you something. When it's dark and I'm all alone, and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think “What would Buffy do?” You're my hero. OK, sometimes when it's dark and I'm all alone, I think “What is Buffy wearing?”

 * Xander: So, all that other stuff in there, that's just gonna sit in there, right? I mean, no one owns it in the strictest sense.
 * Oz: It seems wrong somehow.
 * Xander: Dibs on the rowing machine.
 * Giles: Buffy!
 * Willow: Hi, Giles.
 * Xander: What's with the arsenal?
 * Giles: I've been awake all night. I know I'm supposed to teach you self-reliance, but I can't leave you out there to fight alone. Uh, to hell with what's right. I-I'm ready to back you up. Let's find the evil and-and-and fight it together.
 * Buffy: Great. Thanks. We'll get right on that.
 * Giles: The evil is this way?
 * Buffy: My room is.
 * Willow: Hey, Giles, can you get this box on top?
 * Giles: Um...
 * Xander: So, college not so scary after all, huh?
 * Buffy: It's turning out to be a lot like high school, which I can handle. At least I know what to expect.

Living Conditions

 * Willow: And you thought your days of sneaking out of your room were over.
 * Buffy: No such luck. Kathy's nice and all, but she's... she's sort of... I don't know, like 'mini-mom of Momdonia.'

 * Buffy: You guys can do the brain thing, I'm gonna go to class.
 * Oz: Which could also be construed as the 'brain thing'.
 * Buffy: Not when you're minoring in Nap 101.

 * Buffy: ... so then Kathy's like, "It's share time." And I'm like, "Oh yeah? Share this!"
 * [She punches the air.]
 * Oz: So, either you hit her, or you did your wacky mime routine for her.
 * Buffy: Well, I didn't do either, actually. But she deserves it, don't you think?
 * Oz: Nobody deserves a mime, Buffy.

 * Willow: [on the phone with Rupert Giles] Giles, I just talked to Buffy and, yeah, I think she's feeling a little... insane. [pause] No, not bitchy crazy, more like... homicidal maniac crazy. So I told her to come see you, OK?

 * Willow: How's that?
 * Buffy: Mm-mmm. A little to the left. There. Perfect. Oh, I'm so glad you're here, Will. I can already feel all that bad Kathy karma just draining away.
 * Willow: About that-- the Kathy thing. I'm sorry I doubted you.
 * Buffy: You're completely forgiven. I mean, you had reason to doubt. Except for the soul-sucking thing, I bet Kathy was pretty regular as far as roomies go.
 * Willow: That's a pretty big "except."
 * Buffy: I guess. I'm just glad that it was Kathy's demony ways making me no-fun Buffy. I've always thought I was pretty easy going, you know? It's not like I have the big issues. I don't burn incense or--
 * Willow: You gonna finish this?

The Harsh Light of Day

 * Anya: I can't stop thinking about you. Sometimes, in my dreams, you're all naked.
 * Xander: Really? You know, if I'm in the checkout lane at the Wal-Mart, I've had that same one.

 * Buffy: What's the matter, Spike? Dru dump you again?
 * Spike: Maybe I dumped her!
 * Harmony: She left him for a fungus demon. That's all he talks about most days.
 * Spike: Harm!

 * Anya: I like you. You're funny and you're nicely shaped. And, frankly, it's ludicrous to have these interlocking bodies and not... interlock. Please remove your clothing now.
 * Xander: And the amazing thing? Still more romantic than Faith.

 * Oz: [Looking through Giles's albums] Ok, either I'm borrowing all your albums or I'm moving in.
 * Giles: Oz, there are more important things than records right now.
 * Oz: [Holds up Loaded by The Velvet Underground] More important than this one?
 * Giles: Well, I suppose an argument could be made for--
 * Xander: Whoa! Giles has a TV! Everybody... Giles has a TV, he's shallow like us!

 * Harmony: Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?
 * Spike: No.
 * Harmony: Can I make him a vampire?
 * Spike: No. [Beat] Wait, on second thought, yeah. Go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids as well.

Fear, Itself

 * Anya: You haven't called. Not once!
 * Xander: You said you were over me.
 * Anya: And you just accepted that? I only said that because I thought that's what you wanted to hear.
 * Xander: Well, that's the funny thing about me. I tend to hear the actual words people say and accept them at face value.
 * Anya: That's stupid.
 * Xander: I accept that.

 * Willow: [about her costume] I'm Joan of Arc. I figured we had a lot in common, seeing as how I was almost burned at the stake, plus she has that close relationship with God.
 * Xander: [to Oz] And you are?
 * [Oz opens his jacket and reveals a name tag that says "God."]
 * Xander: Of course. I wish I'd thought of that before I put down my deposit. I could've been God.
 * Oz: Blasphemer.
 * [Buffy, Xander, Willow and Oz met some strange men in masks with guns and walks past them]
 * Buffy: Nice costumes. Very Stealthy.
 * Willow: Who are they supposed to be?
 * Oz: Nato?
 * Xander: Oh, I uh invited Anya over to join us, but; she is having some trouble finding a scary costume and she'll probably meet us there.
 * Buffy: Perfect! Everyone's got a date except a third wheel Buffy.
 * Willow: You're not a third wheel
 * Xander: Technically speaking, you're a fifth wheel.
 * Willow: We're gonna have the best time.

 * Giles: [reading from the book] "The summoning spell for Gachnar can be shut down in one of two ways. Destroying the Mark of Gachnar..."
 * [Buffy promptly stamps into the floor, destroying the Mark on the floor and tearing up the boards; she looks very self-satisfied]
 * Giles: [greatly irritated] "...is not one of them, and will, in fact, immediately bring forth the fear demon itself!"

 * [The demon Gachnar slowly emerges from the pentacle in the floor... and is revealed to be just six inches tall.]
 * Buffy: This is Gachnar?
 * Xander: [looks down mockingly at Gachnar] Big overture... little show.
 * Gachnar: [in a squeaky voice] I am the Dark Lord of Nightmares. The Bringer of Terror! Tremble before me. Fear me!
 * Willow: He... he's so cute.
 * Gachnar: Tremble.
 * [Xander pokes a finger at the tiny demon, speaking to it as if to a puppy.]
 * Xander: Who's the little fear demon? Come on, who's the little fear demon?
 * Gachnar: I bring the terror.
 * Giles: Don't taunt the fear demon.
 * Xander: Why? Can he hurt me?
 * Giles: No, it's just... tacky. Be that as it may, Buffy, when it comes to slaying...
 * Gachnar: I bring the fear.
 * Buffy: Size doesn't matter?
 * Gachnar: They're all going to abandon you, you know.
 * Buffy: Yeah, yeah. [squishes him]

 * [After defeating Gachnar, Giles looks back at the small image of him in the book]
 * Oz: Some quality treats here, Giles.
 * Giles: Please finish them.
 * Buffy: This is much better. There is no problem that cannot be solved by chocolate.
 * Willow: I think I'm gonna barf.
 * Buffy: Except that.
 * Anya: What?
 * Xander: That's your scary costume?
 * Anya: Bunnies frighten me.
 * Giles: Oh, bloody hell. The inscription.
 * Buffy: What's the matter?
 * Giles: I should've translated the Gaelic inscription under the illustration of Gachnar.
 * Buffy: What's it say?
 * Giles: "Actual size."

Beer Bad

 * Willow: Aren't you too young to be a bartender?
 * Xander: Au contraire, mon frere.
 * Buffy: Mon frere means brother.
 * Xander: Mon girl-frere. Behold! [holds up a fake ID]
 * Willow: I don't believe this is entirely on the up and up.
 * Xander: What gives it away?
 * Willow: Looking at it.

 * Willow: Buffy that is my best friend you need to think about not Parker. He's no good. There are men, better men, wherein the mind is stronger than the penis.
 * Xander: Nothing can defeat the penis! [looks around] Too loud, very unseemly.

 * Oz: Hey, you got a table.
 * Willow: I had to kill a man.
 * Oz: Well it's a really good table.

 * Giles: I can't believe you served Buffy that beer.
 * Xander: I didn't know it was evil.
 * Giles: You knew it was beer!
 * Xander: Well, excuse me, Mr. I-spent-the-sixties-in-an-electric-Kool-Aid-funky-Satan-groove!
 * Giles: It was the early seventies, and you should know better.

 * Xander: And was there a lesson in all this? huh? What did we learn about beer?
 * Buffy: Foamy.
 * Xander: Good, just as long as that's clear. Anyways I think the boys in the car are contained for the time being. This'll give them some time to ponder the geo-political ramifications of being mean to me!

Wild at Heart

 * Willow: The Bronze is more fun this year, isn't it?
 * Buffy: 'Cause of the gloating factor alone, you know? We're all about college, now. We've got heady discourse.
 * Oz: Yeah, curfew-free nights of mom and pop-less hootenanny.
 * Xander: Co-ed dating prospects who find townies sexy and dangerous. What? I can dream.
 * Buffy: Right. So if college is so great, what are we doing here and why is it more fun?
 * Willow: Because the Bronze is nice and familiar. It's like a big comfy blankie.
 * Oz: Will, I was under the impression that I was your big comfy blankie.
 * Willow: Aw, you're my person blankie. This is my place blankie.

 * Willow: How come you didn't tell me I look like a crazy birthday cake in this shirt?
 * Buffy: I thought that was the point.

 * Oz: You don't wanna find out what I am.
 * Veruca: You're an animal... Animals kill.
 * Oz: You're right. We kill.

 * Willow: Oz, don't you love me?
 * Oz: My whole life, I've never loved anything else.

 * Oz: Veruca was right about something. The wolf is inside me all the time, and I don't know where that line is anymore between me and it. And until I figure out what that means, I shouldn't be around you... Or anybody.
 * Willow: Well, that could be a problem 'cause people... Kind of a planetary epidemic.

The Initiative

 * Buffy: You know, for someone who teaches human behavior, you might try showing some.
 * Professor Walsh: It's not my job to coddle my students.
 * Buffy: You're right. A human being in pain has nothing to do with your job. [exits]
 * Professor Walsh: I like her.

 * Willow: OK, say that I help and you start a conversation. It goes great. You like Buffy, she likes you. You spend time together, feelings grow deeper and one day, without even realizing it, you find you're in love. Time stops and it feels like the whole world's made for you two and you two alone, until the day one of you leaves and rips the still-beating heart from the other, who's now a broken, hollow mockery of the human condition.
 * Riley: [taken aback] Yep, that's the plan.
 * Willow: I figured it was.

 * [Willow is trying to help Riley get together with Buffy]
 * Willow: Talk, funny is good but don't be glib. And remember, if you hurt her I will beat you to death with a shovel. A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend.  Have fun!

 * [Spike, having tricked Willow into inviting him into her dorm room, prepares to attack her.]
 * Spike: I'll give you a choice. Now I'm going to kill you - no choice in that. But I can let you stay dead... or bring you back, to be like me.
 * Willow [frightened]: I'll scream!
 * Spike: Bonus. [moves toward Willow's neck]
 * [A short time later, Spike sits on Willow's bed, confused and disconsolate. Willow still cowers from him.]
 * Spike: I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me b-before.
 * Willow: Maybe you were nervous.
 * Spike: I felt all right when I started. Let's try again. [he leaps on her and draws back in pain] Ow! Oh! {he tries again] Ow! Damn it!
 * Willow: Maybe you're trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
 * Spike: Not to me it doesn't.
 * Willow: It's me, isn't it?
 * Spike: What are you talking about?
 * Willow: Well, you came looking for Buffy, then settled. You didn't wanna bite me. I just happened to be around.
 * Spike: Piffle.
 * Willow: I know I'm not the kind of girl vamps like to sink their teeth into. It's always like, "Oooh, you're like a sister to me," or, "Oh, you're such a good friend."
 * Spike: Don't be ridiculous. I'd bite you in a heartbeat.
 * Willow: Really?
 * Spike: Thought about it.
 * Willow: When?
 * Spike: Remember last year, you had on that, uh, fuzzy pink number with the lilac underneath?
 * Willow: I never would've guessed. You played the blood-lust kinda cool.
 * Spike: Mmm. I hate being obvious. All fangy and "rrr!" Takes the mystery out.
 * Willow: But if you could...
 * Spike: If I could, yeah.
 * [beat]
 * Willow: You know, this doesn't make you any less terrifying.
 * Spike: Don't patronize me. [desperate and embarrassed]: I'm only 126!
 * Willow: You're being too hard on yourself. Why don't we wait a half an hour and try again? [pauses, realizes what she's saying] Or...
 * [Willow grabs a lamp, smashes it over Spike's head and tries to flee the room.]
 * [Willow grabs a lamp, smashes it over Spike's head and tries to flee the room.]

 * Xander: Well, how about this: we whip out the Ouija board, light a few candles, summon some ancient unstoppable evil? Mayhem, mayhem, mayhem; we show up and and kick its ass.
 * Giles [pauses to contemplate]: A wee bit unethical.

Pangs

 * Willow: Thanksgiving isn't a-about blending of two cultures. It's about one culture wiping out another! A-and then they make animated specials about the part where... w-with the maize and th-the big, big belt buckles. They don't show you the next scene, where... where all the bison die, a-and Squanto takes a musketball in the stomach!
 * Buffy: Okay, now, for some of that, you were channeling your mother?

 * Buffy: With Mom at Aunt Darlene's this year, I'm not getting a Thanksgiving. Maybe it's just as well.
 * Anya: Well, I think that's a shame. I love a ritual sacrifice.
 * Buffy: It's not really a one of those.
 * Anya: To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice... with pie.

 * Anya: I inflicted a lot of putrefying diseases on men when I was an avenging demon, you look like you're getting all of them.
 * Xander: Okay, I'll stay. But you should go, you could catch it.
 * Anya: We'll die together. It's romantic... Help me get your trousers off.
 * Xander: You're a strange girlfriend.
 * Anya: I'm a girlfriend?
 * Xander: Oh, there's a chance I'm delirious.
 * Anya: Ah, yes. Well, whatever it is that's making you sick, so far I like it.

 * Spike: Oh, someone put a stake in me!
 * Xander: You gotta lot of volunteers in here.
 * Spike: I just can't take all this namby-pamby boo-hooing about the bloody Indians.
 * Willow: Uh, the preferred term is-
 * Spike: You won. All right? You came in and you killed them and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. That's what Caesar did, and he's not going around saying, "I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it." The history of the world is not people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story.
 * Buffy: Well, I think the Spaniards actually did a lot of-- Not that I don't like Spaniards.
 * Spike: Listen to you. How you gonna fight anyone with that attitude?
 * Willow: We don't wanna fight anyone.
 * Buffy: I just wanna have Thanksgiving.
 * Spike: Heh. Yeah...Good luck.
 * Willow: If we could talk to him--
 * Spike: You exterminated his race. What could you possibly say that would make him feel better? It's kill or be killed here. Take your bloody pick.
 * Xander: Maybe it's the syphilis talking, but... some of that made sense.
 * Giles: I made a lot of these points earlier, but fine, no one listens to me.

 * Buffy: I'll never get used to this. One day, she's at the friendship ceremony. The next day, she's on the news.
 * Willow:The coroner's office said she was missing an ear. So I'm thinking, maybe we're looking for a witch. There's some great spells that work much better with an ear in the mix.
 * Buffy: That's one fun little hobby you've got there, Will.
 * Willow: Or... or maybe an ear-harvesting demon that--it's, like, building another demon completely out of ears. Or... ooh! Thought. We're just assuming someone else cut off the ear. What if it was self-inflicted, like Van Gogh?
 * Buffy: So... she brutally stabs herself, dumped the body, then cut off her own ear?
 * Willow: No. She cut off her ear, then killed herself, then dumped the body--I'm really off my game, aren't I?

Something Blue

 * Buffy: Seeing Angel in LA, even for five minutes… hello to the pain.
 * Willow: The pain is not a friend.
 * Buffy: But I can't help thinking, isn't that where the fire comes from? Can a nice, safe relationship be that intense? I know it's nuts, but part of me believes that real love and passion have to go hand in hand with pain and fighting. (Stakes a vampire) I wonder where I get that from?

 * Giles: Look, Spike - we have no intention of killing a harmless... uh, creature... we have to know what's been done to you. We can't let you go until we're sure that you're... impotent...
 * Spike: Hey!
 * Giles: Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we're sure you're, you're...
 * Buffy: Flaccid?
 * Spike: You are one step away, missy -
 * Buffy: [sarcastically] Giles, help! He's going to scold me.
 * Buffy: Oh, look at my poor neck... all bare and tender and exposed. All that blood, just pumping away.
 * Giles: Oh, please.
 * Spike: Giles, make her stop.
 * Giles: [walks away] If those two don't kill each other, I might lend a hand.
 * Giles: [walks away] If those two don't kill each other, I might lend a hand.

 * Spike: Passions is on! Timmy's down a bloody well, and if you make me miss it I'll -
 * Giles: Do what? Lick me to death?

 * Buffy: Spike and I are getting married!
 * Xander: How? What? How?
 * Giles: Three excellent questions.
 * Spike: [to Buffy] What are you looking at?
 * Buffy: The man I love.
 * [She and Spike kiss, long and salaciously. Xander and Anya avert their eyes.]
 * Xander: Can I be blind too?

 * Spike: Don't I get a cookie?
 * Buffy: No.
 * Spike: Well, I gotta have something. I still have Buffy taste in my mouth.
 * Buffy: You're a pig, Spike.
 * Spike: Yeah, well, I'm not the one who wanted Wind Beneath My Wings for the first dance.
 * [Xander, Anya and Giles turn and stare incredulously at Buffy.]
 * Buffy: [embarrassed] ... That was the spell!

Hush

 * Willow: Man, that was an exciting class, huh?
 * Buffy: Oh, yeah — wow.
 * Willow: And the last twenty minutes — it was a revelation. Just laid out everything we need to know for the final. I'd hate to have missed that.
 * Buffy: Just tell me I didn't snore.
 * Willow: Very discreet. Minimal drool.

 * [At Giles's apartment, Xander and Anya are arguing about their relationship.]
 * Xander: If you don't know how I feel about -
 * Anya: I don't. This isn't a relationship! You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
 * [The others are silent with disbelief.]
 * Xander: OK... remember how we talked about private conversations? How they're less private when they're in front of my friends?
 * Spike: Oh, we're not your friends. Go on.
 * Giles: Please don't.

 * [Xander ties Spike to a chair before getting into bed.]
 * Spike: Don't see why I have to be tied up.
 * Xander: It's just while I'm sleeping.
 * Spike: Like I'd bite you, anyway.
 * Xander: Oh, you would.
 * Spike: Not bloody likely.
 * Xander: I happen to be very biteable, pal. I'm moist and delicious.
 * Spike: Alright, yeah, fine. You're a nummy treat.
 * Xander: And don't you forget it.

 * [Discussing Willow's wicca group]
 * Buffy: So not stellar, huh?
 * Willow: Talk. All talk. Blah blah Gaia, blah blah moon, menstrual life-force power thingy. You know after a couple of sessions I was hoping we would get into something real but...
 * Buffy: No actual witches in your witch group.
 * Willow: No, bunch of wanna-blessed-bes. Nowadays every girl with a henna tattoo and a spice rack thinks she's a sister to the dark ones.

 * Giles: I thought vampires were supposed to eat blood.
 * Spike: Yeah, well sometimes I like to crumble up the Weetabix in the blood. Gives it a little texture.
 * Giles: Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you'll just have to pick it up yourself.
 * Spike: Sissy.

Doomed

 * Xander: I have to get to work.
 * Spike: Yeah, delivering melted cheese on bread. Doing your part to keep America constipated.

 * [The gang discusses a mysterious symbol.]
 * Willow: Right. It was carved into his chest, like a big creepy eye.
 * Xander: It's kind of like the CBS logo. Hey, could this be the handiwork of one Mr. Morley Safer?
 * Buffy: I'm telling you I've seen this somewhere before. I just can't remember where! I mean, it's like...
 * Giles: It's the end of the world.
 * Buffy, Willow, Xander: Again?
 * Giles: It's, ah, the earthquake... that symbol... yes.
 * Buffy: I told you. I-I said "end of the world", and you're like "poo-poo, southern California, poo-poo"!
 * Giles: I'm so very sorry. My contrition completely dwarfs the impending apocalypse.

 * Xander: Besides, look on the bright side. If we don't come up with a solution, we might face an apocalypse.
 * Spike: [extremely happy] Really? You're not just saying that?

 * Spike: [To Xander] Kids your age are heading off to University. You've made it as far as the basement. And Red here couldn't even keep Dog Boy happy. You can take the loser out of high school, but...
 * Willow: I see what you're doing. You're trying to get us to dust you.
 * Spike: I'm not. I just don't want pity from geeks more useless than I am.

 * Spike: Come on! Vampires! Grr! Nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice, and for the safety of puppies, and Christmas, right? Let's fight that evil! Let's kill something! Oh, come on!

A New Man

 * Maggie Walsh: So, the Slayer!
 * Buffy: Yeah. That's me.
 * Maggie Walsh: We thought you were a myth.
 * Buffy: Well, you were myth-taken

 * Maggie Walsh: It's only our methods that differ; we use the latest in scientific technology and state of the art weaponry and you, if I understand correctly, poke them with a sharp stick.
 * Buffy: Er, its more effective then it sounds-
 * Maggie Walsh: Oh, I'm - quite sure of that. As I'm just as sure that we can learn much from each other. I'm working on getting you clearance into the Initiative, I think you'll find the results of our operation most impressive. Agent Finn here alone has killed and captured... How many is it?
 * Riley: Seventeen: eleven vampires, six demons.
 * Buffy: Oh... wow. I mean, that's... seventeen.
 * Maggie Walsh: What about you?
 * Buffy: Me?
 * Maggie Walsh: How many Hostiles would you say you've slain?
 * [Buffy uncomfortably searches for the right words]

 * Riley: But you killed the- You did that thing with that- Uh, you drowned. And the snake! Not to mention... daily... slayage of... Wow.
 * Buffy: It's no big, really. Hey, who wants ice cream?
 * Riley: Buffy. When I saw you stop the world from, you know, ending, I just assumed that was a big week for you. Turns out I suddenly find myself needing to know the plural of "apocalypse".
 * Buffy: [Light-heartedly] Look, if you were fighting since you were fifteen, you'd have a hefty resume too!
 * Riley: Fifteen?!

 * [Spike is in the process of moving out of Xander's basement.]
 * Xander: You own nothing. This shouldn't be taking so long.
 * Spike: Hang on. Let a fella get organized. [picks up radio.]
 * Xander: That's my radio!
 * Spike: And you're what? Shocked and disappointed? I'm evil!

 * Giles: Spike. Wonderful. A perfect end to a perfect day.
 * Spike: Giles?
 * Giles: Go on, then. Let's get on with the fighting -- You understand me?
 * Spike: Of course I understand you.
 * Giles: I'm speaking English?
 * Spike: No, you're speaking Fyarl. I happen to speak Fyarl. And... by the way, why the hell are you suddenly a Fyarl demon? You just come over all demony this morning?

The I in Team

 * Willow: Guess she's out with Riley. You know how it is with a spanking new boyfriend.
 * Anya: [offhandedly while stacking her chips] Yes, we've enjoyed spanking.
 * [Xander loses control of the deck he was shuffling.]

 * Maggie Walsh: It took the patrol team 42 minutes to track you and you neutralized them in 28 seconds.
 * Buffy: I was just lucky.
 * Maggie Walsh: I see. Well...still. Very impressive.
 * Buffy: I was just being modest with the whole 'lucky' thing. You got that, right?

 * Riley: Regret to report Hostile 17 still at large. I've left Beta Team to comb the area but the tracer's--
 * Maggie Walsh: [interrupting, with faked sorrow] Riley, something's happened. I-I don't know what to say. It-It's about Buffy.
 * Riley: Buffy?
 * Maggie Walsh: Two of our hostiles broke free and escaped into the tunnels. She went after them on her own. She's dead, Riley.
 * Riley: [utterly shocked] What?
 * Maggie Walsh: I did everything I could to stop her. I told her to wait for a back-up team. She kept insisting she didn't need any team, she could handle it by herself. I-I'm so, so sorry.
 * Riley: [now into shellshock] I don't understand.
 * Maggie Walsh: I know what she meant to you.
 * Riley: How could this happen?
 * Maggie Walsh: She was a very, very special girl. I didn't understand at first, (sighs) but she had something. I don't know, maybe, maybe I could've... stopped her. [Behind Walsh, the com-cam image on the monitors starts to move. Buffy appears in its picture] It's hard not to blame myself.
 * [Not realizing that Riley is suddenly seeing Buffy on the monitors]
 * Buffy: [speaking through the monitor] Professor Walsh? That simple little recon you sent me on... wasn't a raccoon. [Walsh slowly faces the monitors] Turns out it was me trapped in the sewers with a faulty weapon and two of your pet demons. If you think that's enough to kill me, you really don't know what a Slayer is. Trust me when I say you're gonna find out.
 * Maggie Walsh: Riley. Agent Finn, I order you to stop! Agent Finn! Riley!

 * Giles: It'll be dark soon. I think it would be wise for you to leave Sunnydale.
 * Spike: I'm not going anywhere, not until those bastards undo whatever they did to me. Put me back the way I was.
 * Xander: Sure, just explain to the nice scientist guys that you really miss killing and torturing innocent people.
 * Spike: You think that would work?
 * Giles: Spike, Lord know why I'm telling you this. It's for your own good. As long as the Initiative is in operation, it's not safe for you here.
 * Buffy: No. It's not safe for any of us.

 * Maggie Walsh: So, all right. Fine. If she wants a fight we'll give her one, won't we, Adam? I've worked too long, too long, to let some little bitch threaten this project, threaten me. She has no idea who she's dealing with. Once she's gone, Riley will come around. He'll understand. It was for the greater good. He'll see that. And if he doesn't... well, first things first. Remove the complication. And when she least expects it-- [screams, as Adam stabs her from behind] Adam?
 * Adam: Mommy.

Goodbye Iowa

 * Xander: Seems pretty quiet.
 * Buffy: It usually is this time of--
 * Xander: Buff, maybe you should check the look later.
 * Buffy: Shh!
 * Xander: Ow! What'd you do that for?
 * Buffy: Sorry, I'm the only one that can pass the retinal scan.
 * Xander: The-- Ew! I don't wanna see that.
 * Buffy: Retinal scan, Xander. Well, we'll know in a few seconds if my clearance is still good.
 * Xander: Or if we're about to die at the hands of 50 grief-fueled military goons. Why am I not entirely comforted by the arrival of the man-size microwave?

 * Xander: Holy moley!
 * Buffy: I know.
 * Xander: I totally get it now. Can I have sex with Riley, too? Quick, pretent to make out with me!
 * Buffy: What? What are you talking about?!
 * Xander: Well, I, uh... You know, in the movies, the guy and the girl have to hide.
 * Buffy: Please. Could you possibly draw more attention to us? This is the Initiative, Xander. Military guys and scientists do not make out with each other.
 * Xander: Well, maybe that's what's wrong with the world. Ever think about that?

 * [Buffy, Willow, and Anya are watching Road Runner in bed in Xander's Basement]
 * Buffy: That would never happen.
 * Willow: Well no, Buff. That's why they're called cartoons not documentaries.

 * Buffy: I'm going to the crime scene to see what I can find out. You guys research the Polgara demon. I want to know where it is. When I find it, I'm going to make it pay for taking that kid's life. I'll make him die in ways he can't even imagine.
 * [uncomfortable pause]
 * Buffy: That probably would've sounded more commanding if I wasn't wearing my yummy sushi pajamas.

 * Buffy: [about Adam] I could barely fight him. It was like Maggie designed him to be the ultimate warrior. He's smart and fast; he gave the commando guys the slip with no problem.
 * Willow: There's gotta be a flaw.
 * Buffy: I think the part where he's pure evil and kills randomly was an oversight.

This Year's Girl

 * Spike: What do you need?
 * Xander: Her. Dark hair, yea tall, name of Faith, criminally insane.
 * Giles: Have you seen her?
 * Spike: Is this bird after you?
 * Xander: In a bad way, yeah.
 * Spike: Tell you what I'll do, then. I'll head out, find this girl, tell her exactly where all of you are, and then watch as she kills you. [sees the surprised looks on Giles and Xanders faces and sighs] Can any one of your damn little Scooby club at least try to remember that I HATE you all? Just because I can't do the damage myself doesn't stop me from aiming a loose cannon your way. And here I thought the evening would be dull.
 * Xander: Go ahead! You wouldn't even recognize her!
 * Spike: Dark hair, this tall, name of Faith. Criminally insane. I like this girl already.
 * Xander: [to Giles] We're dumb.

 * Willow: What did you tell him?
 * Buffy: The truth, that she's my wacky identical cousin from England and whenever she visits, hijinks ensue.
 * Willow: It's good you guys have such an honest relationship.
 * Buffy: No, I told him the story. I vagued-up a few bits but no flat-out lies.
 * Willow: That's fair. How'd you handle the Angel-y parts?
 * Buffy: I did some editing. It's not that I'm trying to hide anything from Riley. It's... just that that's a longer conversation, and, I had a Faith hunt to do.
 * Willow: Any luck?
 * Buffy: Couldn't find her. Don't know exactly where to place that in the luck continuum.
 * Willow: At least you're not alone on this. I'll bet every cop in Sunnydale is out there looking for her right now.
 * Buffy: Pressure's definitely high. I'll tell you, if I were her, I'd get out of Dodge post-hasty.
 * Faith: You're not me.

 * Faith: So, check you out, B. Nice. The "big girl on campus" thing's really working for you.
 * Buffy: I've been looking for you.
 * Faith: I've been standing still for eight months, B. How hard you look?
 * Buffy: Are you all right?
 * Faith: Five by five. That's the thing about a coma-- you wake up all rested and rejuvenated, and ready for payback.
 * Buffy: So much for pleasantries, huh?
 * Faith: What'd you think, I'd wake up and we'd go for tea? You tried to gut me, Blondie.
 * Buffy: You'd have done the same to me if you'd had the chance.
 * Faith: So let's have another go at it, see who lands on top.
 * Buffy: It doesn't have to be like this, you know.
 * Faith: Actually, I think it has to be exactly like this.
 * Buffy: Faith, these are innocent people.
 * Faith: No such animal.
 * Buffy: I guess it was too much to hope that you'd use your downtime to reflect and grow.
 * Faith: Could say the same about you. I mean, you're still the same old "better than thou" Buffy. I mean, I knew it somehow. I kept having this dream. I'm not sure what it means, but in the dream, this self-righteous blonde chick stabs me. And you want to know why?
 * Buffy: You had it coming.
 * Faith: That's one interpretation. But in my dream, she does it for a guy. [Willow starts to sneak up behind Faith and is about to hit her with her backpack] Try it, Red, and you lose an arm. [Willow backs off] I wake up to find that this blonde chick isn't even dating the guy she was so nuts about before. I mean, she's moved on to the first college beefstick she meets. And not only has she forgotten about the love of her life, she's forgotten all about the chick she nearly killed for him. So that's my dream. That and some stuff about cigars and a tunnel. But, uh, tell me, college girl, what does it mean?
 * Buffy: To me? Mostly, that you still mouth off about things you don't understand. [Police sirens are heard] Uh-oh, I guess somebody knows you're here. [Faith hits Buffy]
 * Officer: Break it up!
 * Faith: You took my life, B. Payback's a bitch.
 * Willow: Look who's talking.
 * Faith: See you around.

 * Faith: Hi, Joyce. Mind if I come in?

 * Faith: Ruby Sunset. Burgundy Skyline? Harlot. Mmm. Way to go, Joyce. Now, normally, I wouldn't be going with a color this dark, but I read in some magazine eight months in a coma will damage a girl's natural skin tone. Good thing pale is in this year. Or was it last year? Mwah. Anyway, for real now, I'm gonna ask you something, and you got to promise you'll be honest and not spare my feelings just 'cause I could kill you. You promise?
 * Joyce: I promise.
 * Faith: Okay. How do I look?
 * Joyce: Psychotic.
 * Faith: Hmm. I was shooting for sultry, but, hey... Bet I know what you're thinking.
 * Joyce: Really?
 * Faith: You're thinking, "You're never get away with this." Warm?
 * Joyce: Actually, I was thinking my daughter is going to kill you soon.
 * Faith: That a fact?
 * Joyce: More like a bet.
 * Faith: Whoa. You got a pair on you, Joyce. I like seeing that in a woman your age. Guess you can afford to talk that way. I mean, in the world according to Joyce, Buffy is gonna come crashing through that door any minute. But, look what I found. Buffy Summers. Buffy Summers, Buffy Summers, Buffy, Buffy. A lot of letters. She, uh, hasn't been by in a while, huh? And you think, with a crazy chick like me on the loose, crazy chick with a wicked grudge against her, no less, she'd call and give you a heads-up. But Buffy's too into her own deal to remember dear old mom.
 * Joyce: You don't know the first thing about Buffy. Or me.
 * Faith: Don't I? I know what it's like.  You think you matter.  You think you're a part of something, and you get dumped. It's like the whole world is moving but you're stuck.  Like those animals in the tar pits.  It's like you just keep sinking a little deeper everyday and nobody even sees.
 * Joyce: [sounding bored] Were you planning to slit my throat anytime soon?
 * Faith: Don't tell me you don't see it, Joyce. You served your purpose.  You squirted out the kid, raised her up, and now you might as well be dead.  I mean, nobody cares, nobody remembers,  especially not Buffy, fabulous superhero.  Sooner or later you're gonna have to face it, she was over us a long time ago, Joyce.  [voice rising to a shout] Too busy climbing onto her new boy toy to give a single thought to the people that matter!  I mean, you're her mother, and she just leaves you here to die!
 * Buffy: [Dives in through the window, punches Faith] Hi, Mom.
 * Joyce: Hi, honey.

Who Are You?

 * Joyce: Faith, why do you think she's like that?
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] You know, she's a nut job.
 * Joyce: I just don't understand what could drive a person to that kind of behavior.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] Well, how do you know she got drove? I mean, maybe she likes being that way.
 * Joyce: I'll never believe that. I think she's horribly unhappy.
 * Faith [in Buffy's body, about Faith]: Well, could be things are looking up. I mean, a little stint in the pokey, show her the error of her ways. I'm sure there's some big ol' Bertha just waiting to shower her ripe little self with affection.
 * Joyce: Buffy!
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] I'm sorry, Mom. It's just... when I think about how she might have hurt you, I just... I can't stand it.
 * Joyce: Oh. Sorry.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] No, I'm just... sore from the fight.
 * Joyce: I've missed you.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] 'Cause I haven't visited, right? I knew it.
 * Joyce: I know how it is. You've got so much in your life now.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] I'm a busy little beaver. College and all.
 * Joyce: Of course. But, um, maybe we could spend some time together soon? Some night when I'm not being held hostage by a raving psychotic.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] Count on it. I'm gonna take a bath.

 * Spike: You know why I really hate you, Summers?
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] 'Cause I'm a stuck-up tight-ass with no sense of fun?
 * Spike: Well, yeah. That covers a lot of it.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] 'Cause I could do anything I want and instead I choose to pout and whine and feel the burden of Slayerness. I mean, I could be rich, I could be famous. I could have anything. Anyone. Even you, Spike. I could ride you at a gallop until your legs buckled and your eyes rolled up. I've got muscles you've never even dreamed of. I could squeeze you until you pop like warm champagne and you'd beg me to hurt you just a little bit more. And you know why I don't? [mockingly] Because it's wrong.
 * Spike: I get this chip out, you and me are going to have a confrontation.

 * [Buffy tries to convince Giles she truly is Buffy, despite being trapped in Faith's body.]
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Giles!
 * Giles: God!
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Don't move. Okay, Giles, you have to listen to me very carefully. I'm not Faith.
 * Giles: Really?
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Really.
 * Giles: 'Cause the resemblance is striking.
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] I know, Giles. You just have to... Stop inching. You were inching.
 * Giles: Look, I-I know what you're gonna say, and-and, uh...
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] I'm Buffy.
 * Giles: All right, I didn't know what you were going to say, but that doesn't make you any less crazy.
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Faith switched. I mean, she had some device. She switched our bodies. Giles, I swear... it's me.
 * Giles: Um, if-if you are Buffy, then, uh... then you'll let me tie you up without killing me, um, until we find out whether you're telling the truth.
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Giles, Faith has taken my body, and for all I know, she's taken it to Mexico by now. I don't have time for bondage fun. Ask me a question. Ask me anything.
 * Giles: Who's president?
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] We're checking for Buffy, not a concussion.
 * Giles: Oh, yes, right. Um...
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] Oh, this is... Giles, you turned into a demon, and I knew it was you. I mean, can't you just look into my eyes and be all intuitive?
 * Giles: How did I turn into a demon?
 * Buffy [in Faith's body]: Oh, 'cause, uh, Ethan Rayne. And-and you have a girlfriend named Olivia, and you haven't had a job since we blew up the school, which is valid lifestyle-wise. I mean, it's not like you're a slacker-type, but... Oh, oh! When I had psychic power, I heard my mom think that you were like a stevedore during sex. What...? Do you want me to continue?
 * Giles: Actually, I beg you to stop.
 * Buffy [in Faith's body]: What's a stevedore?
 * Giles: All right, let's... um, I need you to explain everything.
 * Buffy: [in Faith's body] And I will after we get Faith.

 * [Faith, in Buffy's body, enters the church where three vampires are holding the parishioners hostage.]
 * Boone: I told the cops, they send anyone in, I start the whole massacre thing.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] Well, I'm not the cops. I just came to pray.
 * Boone: Now's a good time to start.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] You're not going to kill these people.
 * Boone: Why not?
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] [earnestly this time] Because it's wrong.
 * Boone: You're the Slayer.
 * Faith: [in Buffy's body] The one and only.

 * Buffy: She's gone. Not a trace. Giles said the Council guys have cleared out, too.
 * Riley: I don't understand. How could she have... I mean, how's it possible?
 * Buffy: Magic.
 * Riley: I knew there was something. I should've picked up on it. I mean, I should have just...
 * Buffy: You slept with her.
 * Riley: I slept with you. Man, would I like to get my hands on her. Not in a sex way.
 * Buffy: I don't think she's coming back.
 * Riley: Guess she's had her fun.
 * Buffy: Yeah. Fun.

Superstar

 * Buffy: But someone could wish the whole world to be different, right? That's... possible?
 * Anya: Sure. Alternate realities. You could, uh, could have, like, a world without shrimp, or with, you know, nothing but shrimp. You could even make, like, a freaky world where Jonathan's like some kind of not-perfect mouth-breather, if that's what's blowing up your skirt these days. Just don't ask me to live there.

 * Buffy: I'm not entirely sure that we can trust our memories. Anya, tell them about the alternate universes.
 * Anya: Oh, okay. Say you really like shrimp a lot or we could say you don't like shrimp at all. "Blah, I wish there weren't any shrimp" you'd say to yourself-
 * Buffy: Stop! You're saying it wrong. I think that Jonathan may be doing something so that he's manipulating the world and we're all, like, his pawns.
 * Anya: Or prawns.
 * Buffy: Stop with the shrimp! I'm trying to do something here.

 * Buffy: Giles, do you have a Jonathan swimsuit calendar?
 * Giles: No... Yes... it was a gift.

 * Spike: I wasn't exactly pining for a noisy visit from Wonder Jonathan and his fluffy battle kitten.

 * [At Giles' place. Riley pages through a spellbook.]
 * Riley: These spells, they really work? I mean, can you really turn your enemies inside out? Or... learn to excrete gold coins.
 * Anya: That one's not so much fun.
 * Willow: They work, Riley, but they take concentration. Being attuned with the forces of the universe.
 * Xander: Right, you can't just go librum incendere and expect --
 * [The book catches on fire; Xander closes it rapidly.]
 * Giles: Xander, don't speak Latin in front of the books.

Where the Wild Things Are

 * [When Buffy and Riley are attacked by a vampire-demon tag-team.]
 * Buffy: Okay, you get Fangs, I'll get Horny. I mean...

 * Xander: Buffy and Riley are trapped.
 * Anya: So? She's a Slayer, he's a big soldier boy. What do they need you for?
 * Xander: Anya, look around: there's ghosts and shaking and people are going all Felicity with their hair. We're fresh out of super-people and somebody's gotta go back in there. Now, who's with me?
 * Spike: I am. I know I'm not the first choice for heroics, and Buffy's tried to kill me more than once, and I don't fancy a single one of you at all, but... Actually, all that sounds pretty convincing. [walks off.] I wonder if Asian House is open.

 * [Giles is singing and playing "Behind Blue Eyes" by The Who at an espresso bar. Anya, Willow, Xander and Tara watch from the door, amazed. All three girls are riveted; Willow's and Anya's mouths are hanging open.]
 * Anya: Oh.
 * Willow: Wow.
 * Xander: Um, could we go back to the haunted house? Cause, this is creeping me out.
 * Tara: Does he do this a lot?
 * Xander: [sarcastic.] Sure. Every day the earth rotates backward and the skies turn orange.
 * Willow: Now I remember why I used to have such a crush on him.
 * Tara: Well, he is pretty good.
 * Anya: His voice is... pleasant.
 * Xander: [incredulous.] What?!
 * Willow: Oh, come on, he is kinda sexy.
 * Xander: I'm fighting total mental breakdown here, Will. No more fueling the fire, please.

 * Giles: I believe we're dealing with a kind of poltergeist. A whole cluster of them, in fact, born out of intense adolescent emotion and sexual energy.
 * Anya: Both of which were totally pent up during Mrs. Holt's reign of repression.
 * Xander: So with Buffy and Riley having... you know, acts of nakedness 'round the clock lately, maybe they set something free. Like a big, bursting poltergasm.

 * Giles: When you called to Buffy and Riley didn't cry out or respond in any way.
 * Anya: No, they're probably dead.
 * Xander: Unless they're too busy doing it to answer.
 * Giles: Doing what?
 * Xander: You know, for a god of acoustic rock you're... kind of naive.
 * Giles: I didn't think you meant... In the midst of all that? Do you really think they were keeping it up?
 * [long awkward pause]
 * Giles: Oh, for different phrasing.

New Moon Rising

 * Buffy: Zippo. Patrol has been totally uneventful. My kill count's way down.
 * Willow: [to Tara] She means that there's been less bad guy activity.
 * Giles: And we know what that often indicates.
 * Xander: Buffy doesn't make her quota. Bad Slayer!

 * Buffy: Oz isn't dangerous. Something happened to him that wasn't his fault. I never knew you were such a bigot!
 * Riley: I'm not. I'm just saying it's a little strange to date someone who tries to eat you once a month!

 * Willow: [Speaking of Oz's return] It's complicated...because of Tara.
 * Buffy: You mean Tara has a crush on Oz? No... [suddenly realizes Willow is in love with Tara] Oh! Oh... Well, there you go! I mean, you know, you have to... follow your heart, Will. And that's what's important, Will.
 * Willow: Why do you keep saying my name like that?
 * Buffy: Like what, Will?
 * Willow: Are you freaked?
 * Buffy: [overly insistent] What? No, Will! [pauses, then gathers her emotions] No. No, absolutely no to that question. I'm glad you told me.
 * Willow: I don't want to hurt anyone, Buffy.
 * Buffy: No matter what, somebody's going to get hurt. And the important thing is, you just have to be honest or it's going to be a lot worse.

 * Spike: The thing about the Slayer is she is a whiny little thing, but when it comes to fighting she does have a slight tendency to win.

 * Willow: No candles? Well, I brought one. It's extra flamey. [beat] Tara, I have to tell you...
 * Tara: No, I... I understand. You have to be with the person you l-love. [beat]
 * Willow: [looks a bit hurt, then smiles] I am.
 * Tara: You mean...
 * Willow: I mean. [pause] Okay?
 * Tara: Oh, yes.
 * Willow: I feel horrible about everything I put you through, a-and I'm gonna make it up to you. [smiles] Starting right now.
 * Tara: [smiles] Right now?
 * [Willow nods and smiles]
 * [Tara blows the candle out]

The Yoko Factor

 * Adam: Two Slayers?
 * Spike: That's right.
 * Adam: And you killed them both?
 * Spike: Yeah. I killed the hell out of 'em.
 * Adam: Yet you fear this one?
 * Spike: Hey, watch it, mate! I don't fear anything. I just know my enemies.
 * Adam: Do you? Then why haven't you killed this Slayer yet?
 * Spike: Because...! Stinking rotten luck is why.  On top of that, now I got this buggering chip up my head.
 * Adam: Yes. Your behavior modification circuitry. I know what you feel.
 * Spike: [scoffing] Not likely.
 * Adam: You feel smothered. Trapped like an animal. Pure in its ferocity, unable to actualize the urges within. Clinging to one truth, like a flame struggling to burn within an enclosed glass: that a beast this powerful cannot be contained. Inevitably, it will break free and savage the land again. I will make you whole again, make you savage.
 * Spike: [is speechless with awe for a moment] Wow... I mean, yeah. I get why the demons all fall in line with you. You're like Tony Robbins! If he was a big scary, Frankenstein-looking... You're exactly like Tony Robbins.

 * Giles: [singing and playing "Free Bird" by Lynyrd Skynyrd] If I leave here tomorrow Would you still remember me? Well I must be traveling on now There's too many places I've got to see And if I stay here with you, girl Things just couldn't be the same 'Cause I'm as free as bird now--
 * [Giles suddenly shrieks as he realizes Spike is standing in the room.]
 * Spike: You know, for someone who's got "Watcher" on his resume', you might want to cast an eye to the front door every now and again.

 * Spike: [happily] Now that was fun!
 * Adam: You were successful?
 * Spike: [scoffs] Easier than I'd thought it'd be, too.
 * Adam: You're sure?
 * Spike: [scoffs] Feel it in my bones. I call it...the Yoko Factor. [off Adam's look] Don't tell me you've never heard of The Beatles?
 * Adam: I have. [stands] I like "Helter Skelter".
 * Spike: What a surprise. The point is, they were once a real powerful group. It's not a stretch to say they ruled the world. And when they broke up everyone blamed Yoko, but the fact is the group split itself apart, she just happened to be there. You know how it is with kids. They go off to college, they grow apart. Way of the world.

 * Xander: You and Willow go do the superpower thing. I'll stay behind and putter around the batcave with crusty old Alfred here.
 * Giles: Ah, no. I am no Alfred, sir. No, you forget. Alfred had a job.

 * [amidst an argument between Buffy, Xander, and Willow]
 * Xander: Maybe that all changes when I'm off doin' sit-ups over at Fort Dix!
 * Giles: Fort Dix? [begins to giggle hysterically]
 * Buffy: Are you drunk?
 * Giles: [finishes laughing] Yes, quite a bit, actually.
 * Buffy: Well, stop it!!
 * Buffy: You guys, stop this! What happened to you today?!
 * Willow: It's not today! Buffy, things have been wrong for a while, don't you see that?
 * Buffy: [perturbed] What do you mean 'wrong?'
 * Willow: Well, things certainly haven't been right since Tara. We have to face it, you can't handle Tara being my girlfriend...
 * Xander: No, it was back before that, since you two went off to college and forgot about me. Just left me in the basement to-- Tara's your girlfriend?!
 * Giles: [from upstairs, still drunk] Bloody hell!
 * Giles: [from upstairs, still drunk] Bloody hell!

Primeval

 * Spike: [On getting Buffy to go where Adam wants her to] Right. The Initiative. But getting her there, that's what the bleeding discs are for, innit? I mean, the little witch gives her the info, and pop! All sends her back down the rabbit hole.
 * Adam: The witch?
 * Spike: Ah, Willow. So high, perky, good with maths. Natural choice.
 * Adam: Her friend.
 * Spike: Right.
 * Adam: One of the friends from which you so efficiently separated her.
 * Spike: Damn right I did! You should have seen 'em, they won't be talking to each other for a long, long- [pointed stare from Adam] -hang on, I think I might have detected a small flaw.
 * Adam: So you failed.
 * Spike: Well, hey, you're supposed to be so smart, but you let me plan this thing! [Adam glares] Well, let's not quibble about who failed who, the important thing is making sure the Slayer is where we want-
 * Adam: Go.
 * Spike: Gone. [Walks to the door] So, um, we'll do this chip thing when I get back?

 * [Buffy explains Adam's evil plan]
 * Xander: Does anyone else miss the Mayor? "I just wanna be a big snake"?

 * Col. McNamara: We hit him with continuous taser blasts.
 * Xander: Great plan. That's right up there with duck and cover.

 * Giles: I do speak Sumerian, it's not that. Only an experienced witch can incant it, and you have to be within striking distance of the subject.
 * Xander: See what you get for taking French instead of Sumerian?
 * Buffy: What was I thinking?
 * Xander: So, no problem, all we need is combo-Buffy. Her with Slayer strength, Giles' multi-lingual know-how and Willow's witchy power. Yeah, don't tell me, I'm just full of helpful suggestions!
 * Giles: As a matter of fact you are.

 * Ward: [about the Initiative] It was an experiment.  The Initiative represented the government's interest in not only controlling the otherworldly menace, but in harnessing its power for our own military purposes.  The considered opinion of this council is that the experiment has failed. Once the prototype took control of the complex, our soldiers suffered a 40% casualty rate.  And it seems that it was only through the actions of a deserter and a group of civilian insurrectionists that our losses were not total.  I trust the irony of that is not lost on any of us.  Maggie Walsh's vision was brilliant, but ultimately insupportable.  The demons cannot be harnessed, cannot be controlled.  It is therefore our recommendation that this project be terminated and all records concerning it expunged.  Our soldiers will be debriefed.  Standard confidentiality clause.  We will monitor the civilians, and usual measures prepared should they try to go public.  I don't think they will.  The Initiative itself will be filled in with concrete.  Burn it down, gentlemen.  Burn it down, and salt the earth.

Restless

 * Xander: Sometimes I think about two women doing a spell, and...then I do a spell by myself.

 * [During Xander's dream, he and Principal Snyder parody "Apocalypse Now."]
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: Where are you from, Harris?
 * Xander as Captain Willard: Well, the basement, mostly.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: Were you born there?
 * Xander as Captain Willard: Possibly.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: I walked by your guidance counselor's office one time. A bunch of you were sitting there ... waiting to be shepherded. I remember it smelled like dead flowers. Like decay. Then it hit me. The hope of our nation's future is a bunch of mulch.
 * Xander as Captain Willard: You know, I never got the chance to tell you how glad I was you were eaten by a snake.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: Where are you heading?
 * Xander as Captain Willard: Well, I'm supposed to meet Tara and Willow. [beat] And possibly Buffy's mom.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: Are you a soldier?
 * Xander as Captain Willard: [shakes head] I'm a comfortador.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: [contemptuous] You're neither. You're a whipping boy. Raised by mongrels and set on a sacrificial stone.
 * Xander as Captain Willard: [nods] I'm getting a cramp.
 * Xander as Captain Willard: [shakes head] I'm a comfortador.
 * Principal Snyder as Colonel Kurtz: [contemptuous] You're neither. You're a whipping boy. Raised by mongrels and set on a sacrificial stone.
 * Xander as Captain Willard: [nods] I'm getting a cramp.

 * Buffy: But what else could I expect from a bunch of low-rent, no-account hoodlums like you? Hoodlums, yes, I mean you and your friends, your whole sex. Throw 'em in the sea for all I care. Throw 'em in and wait for the bubbles. Men, with your groping and spitting. All groin, no brain. Three billion of ya' passin' around the same worn out urge. Men... with your sales.

 * Computer: The demons have escaped. Please run for your lives.
 * Adam: This could be trouble.
 * Riley: We'd better make a fort.
 * Adam: I'll get some pillows.

 * Tara: [speaking for The First Slayer] I have no speech, no name. I live in the action of death. The blood cry, the penetrating wound. I am destruction, absolute, alone.

title: Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Season 4


text:
User talk:129.7.254.33

~ UDScott 15:00, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:129.7.254.33


text:
User talk:72.140.108.71

~ UDScott 15:02, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

title: User talk:72.140.108.71