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John of the Cross

Saint John of the Cross, or San Juan de la Cruz (24 June 1542 – 14 December 1591) was a Spanish Carmelite mystic and poet.

Dark Night of the Soul

 * The Dark Night Of The Soul as translated by David Lewis (1909) - Original Spanish with English translation - Full English text in various formats

con ansias, en amores inflamada, ¡oh dichosa ventura!, salí sin ser notada, estando ya mi casa sosegada; I went forth without being observed, My house being now at rest. In darkness and secure, By the secret ladder, disguised — oh, happy chance! — In darkness and in concealment, My house being now at rest.''' I went out unseen, my house being now all stilled. In darkness, and secure, by the secret ladder, disguised, — ah, the sheer grace! — in darkness and concealment, my house being now all stilled.'' And by a lantern bright I fled my house while all in quiet rest. Shrouded by the night and by the secret stair I quickly fled. The veil concealed my eyes while all within lay quiet as the dead'''
 * En una noche oscura,
 * '''On a dark night, Kindled in love with yearnings — oh, happy chance! —
 * One dark night, fired with love's urgent longings — ah, the sheer grace! —
 * Variant translation by Kieran Kavanaugh and Otilio Rodriguez (1991)
 * '''Upon a darkened night the flame of love was burning in my breast
 * Variant adapted for music by Loreena McKennitt (1994)

Nor I beheld aught, Without light or guide, save that which burned in my heart.
 * In the happy night, In secret, when none saw me,

Oh, night that joined Beloved with lover, Lover transformed in the Beloved!''' O night that has united the Lover with his beloved, transforming the beloved in her Lover. Oh night more loving than the rising sun Oh night that joined the lover to the beloved one transforming each of them into the other.'''
 * '''Oh, night that guided me, Oh, night more lovely than the dawn,
 * O guiding night! O night more lovely than the dawn!
 * Variant translation by Kieran Kavanaugh and Otilio Rodriguez (1991)
 * '''Oh night thou was my guide
 * Variant adapted for music by Loreena McKennitt (1994)

Kept wholly for Himself alone There He stayed sleeping And I caressed Him And the fanning of the cedars made a breeze. The breeze blew from the turret as I parted His locks. With His gentle hand He wounded my neck And caused all my senses to be suspended.
 * Upon my flowery breast

All ceased and I abandoned myself, Leaving my cares forgotten among the lilies.
 * I remained, lost in oblivion; My face I reclined on the Beloved.
 * I abandoned and forgot myself, laying my face on my Beloved; all things ceased; I went out from myself, leaving my cares forgotten among the lilies.
 * Variant translation by Kieran Kavanaugh and Otilio Rodriguez (1991)

Spiritual Canticle of The Soul and The Bridegroom

 * The Spiritual Canticle as translated by E. Allison Peers - A Spiritual Canticle of the Soul and the Bridegroom Christ as translated by David Lewis

I will go over mountains and strands; I will gather no flowers, I will fear no wild beasts; And pass by the mighty and the frontiers.''' ~ 3
 * '''In search of my Love

He passed through the groves in haste, And merely regarding them As He passed Clothed them with His beauty.''' ~ 5
 * '''A thousand graces diffusing

And let the vision and Thy beauty kill me, Behold the malady Of love is incurable Except in Thy presence and before Thy face. ~ 11
 * Reveal Thy presence,

Oh that on Thy silvered surface Thou wouldest mirror forth at once Those eyes desired Which are outlined in my heart! ~ 12
 * O crystal well!

The solitary wooded valleys, The strange islands, The roaring torrents, The whisper of the amorous gales; The tranquil night At the approaches of the dawn, The silent music, The murmuring solitude, The supper which revives, and enkindles love.''' ~ 14 & 15
 * '''My Beloved is the mountains,

Come, south wind, that awakenest love! ''' Blow through my garden, And let its odours flow, And the Beloved shall feed among the flowers. ~ 17
 * '''O killing north wind, cease!

The pleasant and desirable garden, And there reposes to her heart’s content; Her neck reclining On the sweet arms of the Beloved. ~ 22
 * The bride has entered

And there I gave to Him Myself without reserve; There I promised to be His bride. ~ 27
 * There He taught me the science full of sweetness.

And all my substance in His service; ''' Now I guard no flock, Nor have I any other employment: My sole occupation is love. ~ 28
 * '''My soul is occupied,

I am no longer seen or found, '''You will say that I am lost; That, being enamoured, I lost myself; and yet was found.''' ~ 29
 * If, then, on the common land

Thine eyes imprinted in me Thy grace: ''' For this didst Thou love me again, And thereby mine eyes did merit To adore what in Thee they saw. ~ 32
 * '''When Thou didst regard me,

For if I was swarthy once Thou canst regard me now; '''Since Thou hast regarded me, Grace and beauty hast Thou given me.''' ~ 33
 * Despise me not,

Has returned to the ark with the bough'''; And now the turtle-dove Its desired mate On the green banks has found. ~ 34
 * '''The little white dove

And in solitude built her nest; And in solitude, alone Hath the Beloved guided her, In solitude also wounded with love.''' ~ 35
 * '''In solitude she lived,

Let us go forth to see ourselves in Thy beauty, To the mountain and the hill, Where the pure water flows:''' Let us enter into the heart of the thicket. ~ 36
 * '''Let us rejoice, O my Beloved!

To the deep caverns of the rock Which are all secret, There we shall enter in And taste of the new wine of the pomegranate. ~ 37
 * We shall go at once

That which my soul desired; And there Thou wilt give at once, O Thou, my life! That which Thou gavest me the other day. ~ 38
 * There thou wilt show me

The song of the sweet nightingale, The grove and its beauty In the serene night, With the flame that consumes, and gives no pains. ~ 39
 * The breathing of the air,

Notes to the Stanzas

 * I have said that God is pleased with nothing but love; but before I explain this, it will be as well to set forth the grounds on which the assertion rests. All our works, and all our labours, how grand soever they may be, are nothing in the sight of God, for we can give Him nothing, neither can we by them fulfil His desire, which is the growth of our soul. As to Himself He desires nothing of this, for He has need of nothing, and so, if He is pleased with anything it is with the growth of the soul; and as there is no way in which the soul can grow but in becoming in a manner equal to Him, for this reason only is He pleased with our love. It is the property of love to place him who loves on an equality with the object of his love. Hence the soul, because of its perfect love, is called the bride of the Son of God, which signifies equality with Him. In this equality and friendship all things are common, as the Bridegroom Himself said to His disciples: I have called you friends, because all things, whatsoever I have heard of my Father, I have made known to you.
 * Note to Stanza 27

''All my occupation now is the practice of the love of God, all the powers of soul and body, memory, understanding, and will, interior and exterior senses, the desires of spirit and of sense, all work in and by love. All I do is done in love; all I suffer, I suffer in the sweetness of love.'
 * '''My sole occupation is love.
 * Explanation of Stanza 28 part 8

 * When the soul has arrived at this state all the acts of its spiritual and sensual nature, whether active or passive, and of whatever kind they may be, always occasion an increase of love and delight in God: even the act of prayer and communion with God, which was once carried on by reflections and divers other methods, is now wholly an act of love. So much so is this the case that the soul may always say, whether occupied with temporal or spiritual things, "My sole occupation is love." Happy life! happy state! and happy the soul which has attained to it!
 * Explanation of Stanza 28 part 8

 * There is nothing better or more necessary than love.
 * Note to Stanza 28 part 1

 * If the soul has not reached the state of unitive love, it is necessary for it to make acts of love, as well in the active as in the contemplative life. But when it has reached it, it is not requisite it should occupy itself in other and exterior duties — unless they be matters of obligation — which might hinder, were it but for a moment, the life of love in God, though they may minister greatly to His service; because an instant of pure love is more precious in the eyes of God and the soul, and more profitable to the Church, than all other good works together, though it may seem as if nothing were done.
 * Note to Stanza 28 part 2

 * When the soul, then, in any degree possesses the spirit of solitary love, we must not interfere with it. We should inflict a grievous wrong upon it, and upon the Church also, if we were to occupy it, were it only for a moment, in exterior or active duties, however important they might be. When God Himself adjures all not to waken it from its love, who shall venture to do so, and be blameless? In a word, it is for this love that we are all created. Let those men of zeal, who think by their preaching and exterior works to convert the world, consider that they would be much more edifying to the Church, and more pleasing unto God — setting aside the good example they would give if they would spend at least one half their time in prayer, even though they may have not attained to the state of unitive love.
 * Note to Stanza 28 part 3

 * I have said this to explain the stanza that follows, in which the soul replies to those who call in question its holy tranquillity, who will have it wholly occupied with outward duties, that its light may shine before the world: these persons have no conception of the fibres and the unseen root whence the sap is drawn, and which nourish the fruit.
 * Note to Stanza 28 part 4

 * Worldly people are in the habit of censuring those who give themselves up in earnest to God, regarding them as extravagant, in their withdrawal from the world, and in their manner of life. They say also of them that they are useless for all matters of importance, and lost to everything the world prizes and respects! This reproach the soul meets in the best way; boldly and courageously despising it with everything else that the world can lay to its charge. Having attained to a living love of God, it makes little account of all this; and that is not all: it confesses it itself in this stanza, and boasts that it has committed that folly, and that it is lost to the world and to itself for the Beloved.
 * Note to Stanza 29 part 1

 * He who loves is not ashamed before men of what he does for God, neither does he hide it through shame though the whole world should condemn it.
 * Note to Stanza 29 part 4

 * When a soul has advanced so far on the spiritual road as to be lost to all the natural methods of communing with God; when it seeks Him no longer by meditation, images, impressions, nor by any other created ways, or representations of sense, but only by rising above them all, in the joyful communion with Him by faith and love, then it may be said to have found God of a truth, because it has truly lost itself as to all that is not God, and also as to its own self.
 * Note to Stanza 29 part 8

The Sayings of Light and Love

 * Dichos de Luz y Amor, as translated by Kieran Kavanaugh and Otilio Rodriguez (1991)

 * Blessed are they who, setting aside their own pleasure and inclination, consider things according to reason and justice before doing them.

 * Deny your desires and you will find what your heart longs for. For how do you know if any desire of yours is according to God?

 * One human thought alone is worth more than the entire world, hence God alone is worthy of it.

 * The very pure spirit does not bother about the regard of others or human respect, but communes inwardly with God, alone and in solitude as to all forms, and with delightful tranquility, for the knowledge of God is received in divine silence.

 * If you wish to attain holy recollection, you will do so not by receiving but by denying.

 * Souls will be unable to reach perfection who do not strive to be content with having nothing, in such fashion that their natural and spiritual desire is satisfied with emptiness; for this is necessary in order to reach the highest tranquility and peace of spirit. Hence the love of God in the pure and simple soul is almost continually in act.

 * Although you perform many works, if you do not deny your will and submit yourself, losing all solicitude about yourself and your affairs, you will not make progress.

 * If you desire to discover peace and consolation for your soul and to serve God truly, do not find your satisfaction in what you have left behind, because in that which now concerns you you may be as impeded as you were before, or even more. But leave as well all these other things and attend to one thing alone that brings all these with it (namely, holy solitude, together with prayer and spiritual and divine reading), and persevere there in forgetfulness of all things.

 * Love consists not in feeling great things but in having great detachment and in suffering for the Beloved.

 * Not all the faculties and senses have to be employed in things, but only those that are required; as for the others, leave them unoccupied for God.

 * The soul that desires God to surrender himself to it entirely must surrender itself entirely to him without keeping anything for itself.

 * Strive to preserve your heart in peace; let no event of this world disturb it; reflect that all must come to an end.

 * Whoever flees prayer flees all that is good.

 * Live as though only God and yourself were in this world, so that your heart may not be detained by anything human.

Quotes about John of the Cross

The most sublime of all the Spanish mystics, he soars aloft on the wings of Divine love to heights known to hardly any of them.. . . True to the character of his thought, his style is always forceful and energetic, even to a fault. When we study his treatises — principally that great composite work known as the Ascent of Mount Carmel and the Dark Night — we have the impression of a mastermind that has scaled the heights of mystical science; and from their summit looks down upon and dominates the plain below and the paths leading upward.… Nowhere else, again, is he quite so appealingly human; for, though he is human even in his loftiest and sublimest passages, his intermingling of philosophy with mystical theology; makes him seem particularly so. These treatises are a wonderful illustration of the theological truth that grace far from destroying nature, ennobles and dignifies it, and of the agreement always found between the natural and the supernatural — between the principles of sound reason and the sublimest manifestations of Divine grace.
 * It is perhaps not an exaggeration to say that the verse and prose works combined of St. John of the Cross form at once the most grandiose and the most melodious spiritual canticle to which any one man has ever given utterance.
 * Edgar Allison Peers, in an introductory passage to his translation of Dark Night of the Soul

 * May, 1993 — Stratford... have been reading through the poetry of 15th century Spain, and I find myself drawn to one by the mystic writer and visionary St. John of the Cross; the untitled work is an exquisite, richly metaphoric love poem between himself and his god. It could pass as a love poem between any two at any time … His approach seems more akin to early Islamic or Judaic works in its more direct route to communication to his god... I have gone over three different translations of the poem, and am struck by how much a translation can alter our interpretation. Am reminded that most holy scriptures come to us in translation, resulting in a diversity of views.
 * Loreena McKennitt, notes from her journals in the CD booklet for The Mask and Mirror (1994)

 * St John of the Cross is like a sponge full of Christianity: you can squeeze it all out and the full mystical theory remains. Consequently, for fifteen years or so I hated St. John of the Cross and called him a Buddhist. I loved St. Theresa and read her again and again. She is first a Christian, only secondarily a mystic. Then I found that I had wasted fifteen years so far as prayer was concerned.
 * Abbot John Chapman, Spiritual Letters. As quoted in    Swarup, Ram (2000). On Hinduism: Reviews and reflections.

title: John of the Cross


text:
Jonah Goldberg

Jonah Goldberg (born 21 March 1969) is the former editor of National Review Online. He's also a former contributing editor to National Review's print magazine. He writes a weekly column for the Los Angeles Times which is syndicated to many other newspapers and websites as well as also frequently appearing on CNN. Goldberg in 2008 published his first book, Liberal Fascism which reached number one on the New York Times Bestseller List for hardbacks in its seventh week on the list.

A Continent Bleeds (2000)

 * "A Continent Bleeds" (3 May 2000), National Review

 * Africa is a mess. It is a mess by any civilized measure of human progress. It is a mess by most uncivilized measures of human progress.

A Truly Great America (2000)

 * "A Truly Great America" (3 May 2000), National Review

 * Great civilizations create great cathedrals, and the cathedrals of this generation should be in outer space. Cathedrals inspire rich and poor people alike to believe great things are possible. The Mars Polar Lander cost the average American the price of half a cheeseburger. A human lander would cost the average American more — perhaps even ten cheeseburgers! So be it. That is no great sacrifice.

Who the Hell Do You Think You Are? (2000)

 * "Who the Hell Do You Think You Are?" (10 May 2000), National Review

 * [C]onservatism is not supposed to be against change or progress... It is supposed to be skeptical of grandiose or reckless schemes which throw out the good in pursuit of the perfect.

Restoring the "Hidden Law" (2000)

 * "Restoring the 'Hidden Law'" (17 July 2000), National Review

 * Imagine if a friend, or even a son or brother, told you, "Hey, guess what I did last night? I stole a car and then I stole a cop car, I shot at some cops (presumably family men), and resisted arrest every step of the way." My response would be: A) "I hope they beat your ass"; B) "Gee, did they beat your ass?"; C) "How come they didn't beat your ass?"; or D) "Come with me right now so I can take you down to the station so they can beat your ass." There is no E) none of the above.

2001

 * If you're too stupid to understand that a philosophy that favors a federally structured republic, with numerous restraints on the scope and power of government to interfere with individual rights or the free market, is a lot different from an ethnic-nationalist, atheistic, and socialist program of genocide and international aggression, you should use this rule of thumb: If someone isn't advocating the murder of millions of people in gas chambers and a global Reich for the White Man you shouldn't assume he's a Nazi and you should know it's pretty damn evil to call him one.
 * (January 5, 2001)

 * A rising economic tide is bad for people who live off of the poverty of others.
 * (February 2001)

 * One of the main reasons American liberals adore Europe is that Europe still worships its intellectuals. In America, intellectuals are mostly for entertainment. But across the pond, these folks get to do real damage. Why, just this spring a small Italian village had its barbershop cited by the local magistrate because its shaving brushes did not conform to the standard set by the European Union. I am not making this up.
 * (June 13, 2001)

 * There was an NPR story this morning, about the indigenous peoples of Australia, which might make a good column. Apparently they want to preserve their culture, language, and religion because they're slowly disappearing, which is certainly understandable. But, for some reason, they also want more stuff — better education, housing, etc. — from the Australian government. Isn't it odd that it never occurs to such groups that maybe, just maybe, the reason their cultures are evaporating is that they get too much of that stuff already? Indeed, I'm at a loss as to how mastering algebra and biology will make aboriginal kids more likely to believe — oh, I dunno — that hallucinogenic excretions from a frog have spiritual value. And I'm at a loss as to how better clinics and hospitals will do anything but make the shamans and medicine men look more useless. And now that I think about it, that's the point I was trying to get at a few paragraphs ago, when I was talking about the symbiotic relationship between freedom and the hurly-burly of life. Cultures grow on the vine of tradition. These traditions are based on habits necessary for survival, and day-to-day problem solving. Wealth, technology, and medicine have the power to shatter tradition because they solve problems.
 * (August 15, 2001)

Free-Market Boring…Losing Consciousness (2001)

 * "Free-Market Boring…Losing Consciousness" (24 January 2001), National Review

 * Boredom is a powerful incentive to come up with bad ideas, especially for intellectuals. "Capitalism," says Irving Kristol, "is the least romantic conception of a public order that the human mind has ever conceived." The reason it's so unromantic is that it doesn't tell people what to do and that can be very frustrating for intellectuals who want to tell people what to do. Indeed, court intellectuals have always been more influential where the people are less free, because when an intellectual persuades a dictator or a socialist prime minister (a small distinction to be sure), their advice gets translated into reality. When an intellectual says, "It would be a better society if all beer was free" a free-market politician would, or at least should, say "Maybe, but what can I do about it?"

Cynthia McKinney's Last Stand (2001)

 * "Cynthia McKinney's Last Stand" (29 October 2001), Goldberg File, National Review Online

 * Dissent is morally neutral. You can correctly call yourself a dissident because you like to kick puppies, but at the end of the day, you're just a jerk who likes to kick puppies.

2002

 * "DOGS, KIDDIE PORN & STAR TREK: (Hey, that’s a good book title). Unfortunately, I was out with Cosmo when the conversation got interesting around here. First of all, while I think it is wrong to judge dogs by human political categories they most certainly aren’t liberals. Dogs may try to run your life, but they do not much care about running the lives of people they’ve never met. And still, they are willing to judge others -- and admit it. They are morally pragmatic, loyal and willing to share with family while outraged or flummoxed by the idea of taxation for the benefit of people or dogs they don’t know. They firmly believe in sexual harassment as a modus vivendi. They believe nature is a tool. They are not vegetarians and reject animal rights. They chuff at egalitarianism. In short, I think they are Monarchists; they believe in something very close to a Great Chain of Being with humans and dogs at the top (and, even at the top humans and dogs have different ranks)."
 * (April 2002)

Jersey Dems vs. Democracy (2002)

 * "Jersey Dems vs. Democracy" (4 October 2002), National Review

 * An idiot is no smarter if a billion people agree with him and a genius is no dumber if a billion people don't.

2004

 * I think Rummy should walk up to the table, take the oath, offer his prepared apologies and explanations and then, at the end of his remarks, he should take out a long Japanese knife. He should then cut off his pinky. If this Yakuza style contrition doesn't work he should look to the ranking Democrat on the committee and continue removing fingers until he gets a Shogun-like nod that his offering is acceptable. He should then wrap-up up his hand, curtly bow, and then say 'I am now pleased to take your questions.'
 * (May 2004)

 * My first piece of advice — and I mean this from the bottom of my heart — is that we should not get so carried away that we adopt a Logan's Run policy in which conservatives beyond a certain age are twirled around the ceiling of a big stadium and then blown-up to the cheers of younger conservatives.
 * (July 19, 2004)

 * I bet you anything I could destroy Milton Friedman in a debate about economics — so long as the audience was comprised of five year olds. He may have a Nobel Prize, but I can make offensive sounds with my armpit. Advantage: Goldberg!
 * (July 19, 2004)

 * I suppose in John Kerry's world good diplomacy lets the boys in the bar finish raping the girl for fear of causing a fuss. Okay, that was unfair.
 * October 8, 2004)

 * Across the media universe the questions pour out: Why is Dan Rather doing this to himself? Why does he drag this out? Why won't he just come clean? Why would he let this happen in the first place? Why is CBS standing by him? Why . . . why . . . why? There is only one plausible answer: Ours is a just and decent God.
 * (October 11, 2004)

 * In John Kerry's world, it's a defense to say your oldest friends aren't dishonest, they're merely whores.
 * October 2004)

 * Disenfranchisement is something the government does to you. It's not something you do to yourself. If you can't figure out how to fill in the ovals or punch the chads—and some minority of voters will always botch it—that doesn't mean your right to vote was rescinded. It means that you didn't take your right to vote seriously enough to pay attention to the instructions.
 * (October 22, 2004)

 * Take the two leading liberal columnists at the New York Times, Maureen Dowd and Paul Krugman. As we all know, one's a whining self-parody of a hysterical liberal who lets feminine emotion and fear defeat reason and fact in almost every column. The other used to date Michael Douglas.
 * (November 8, 2004)

 * “[Thanksgiving is] my favorite holiday, I think. It's without a doubt my favorite American Holiday. I love Christmastime, Chanuka etc. But Thanksgiving is as close as we get to a nationalist holiday in America (a country where nationalism as a concept doesn't really fit). Thanksgiving's roots are pre-founding, which means its not a political holiday in any conventional sense. We are giving thanks for the soil, the land, for the gifts of providence which were bequeathed to us long before we figured out our political system. Moreover, because there are no gifts, the holiday isn't nearly so vulnerable to materialism and commercialism. It's about things -- primarily family and private accomplishments and blessings -- that don't overlap very much with politics of any kind. We are thankful for the truly important things: our children and their health, for our friends, for the things which make life rich and joyful. As for all the stuff about killing Indians and whatnot, I can certainly understand why Indians might have some ambivalence about the holiday (though I suspect many do not). The sad -- and fortunate -- truth is that the European conquest of North America was an unremarkable old world event (one tribe defeating another tribe and taking their land; happened all the time) which ushered in a gloriously hopeful new age for humanity. America remains the last best hope for mankind. Still, I think it would be silly to deny how America came to be, but the truth makes me no less grateful that America did come to be. Also, I really, really like the food.
 * "Thanksgiving" (24 November 2004), The Corner, National Review

 * I consider the Fourth a patriotic holday more than a nationalist one. We are celebrating the signing of a text, the establishment of a set of laws and principles on the Fourth of July. The Fourth is about political liberty and national independence. It is, for all its pomp and circumstance, a fairly secular and rational holiday. Meanwhile, Thanksgiving plays upon the mystic chords of memory and is prior to and independent of many of things we celebrate on the Fourth. Anyway, I agree its a fair criticism and probably just highlights different perspectives. And, yes, the food on the Fourth of July is really, really good. I am all about hotdogs, beer and barbecue.
 * (November 2004)

Patriot Games (2004)

 * "Patriot Games" (21 April 2004), National Review

 * Why is it fair game to question conservatives' love or loyalty to children or to their fellow man, but beyond the pale to question liberals' love of country?

2005

 * I do think my judgment is superior to (Juan Cole's) when it comes to the big picture. So, I have an idea: Since he doesn't want to debate anything except his own brilliance, let's make a bet. I predict that Iraq won't have a civil war, that it will have a viable constitution, and that a majority of Iraqis and Americans will, in two years time, agree that the war was worth it. I'll bet $1,000 (which I can hardly spare right now).
 * (February 8, 2005)

 * I'd love to have a complete, easy to access collection of quotes-by-me somewhere out there. Why? I dunno. Because it'd be even cooler?
 * (June 16, 2005)

 * I wish to hearby announce that Wikipedia represents the highest, greatest, achievements of human life to date. I shall henceforth replace the phrase "the greatest thing since sliced bread" with the phrase "the greatest thing since Wikipedia." That is so long as what it posts about me is accurate or at least inaccurately extremely flattering.
 * (June 16, 2005)

 * Everywhere, unthinking mobs of "independent thinkers" wield tired clichés like cudgels, pummeling those who dare question “enlightened” dogma. If “violence never solved anything,” cops wouldn’t have guns and slaves may never have been freed. If it’s better that 10 guilty men go free to spare one innocent, why not free 100 or 1,000,000? Clichés begin arguments, they don’t settle them.
 * ( Starbucks "The Way I See It" #22])

Unhappy Warrior (2005)

 * "Unhappy Warrior" (23 September 2005), Goldberg File, National Review Online

 * The porkbusters fight is fun now, but not since early cave men tried to train grizzly bears to give them tongue-baths has a project seemed more obviously doomed to end in disappointment. Expecting Congress — of either party — to give back pork which has already been approved and passed into law is like expecting crack whores to give refunds days after services have been rendered.

Unbelievable (2006)

 * (12 December 2006); "Unbelievable" an item in The Corner blog at National Review Online, December 12, 2006, posted at 9:37 a.m.

 * Making meaningful distinctions is not hypocrisy, it's called "thinking."

Dissident Chicks (2007)

 * "Dissident Chicks" (12 February 2007), The Corner, National Review

 * But, the people who criticized these people were … what? I am so disgusted with people who think free speech is defined as being able to say what you think without being criticized.
 * (In reference to Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks comment at the 49th Grammy Awards that "People are using their freedom of speech tonight [by giving us] all these awards. I'm very humbled.")

Liberal Fascism (2008)

 * Liberal Fascism (2008)

 * [I]n many respects fascism not only is here but has been here for nearly a century. For what we call liberalism--the refurbished edifice of American Progressivism--is in fact a descendant and manifestation of fascism... Progressivism was a sister movement of fascism, and today's liberalism is the daughter of Progressivism.
 * p. 5
 * Fascism is a religion of the state. It assumes the organic unity of the body politic and longs for a national leader attuned to the will of the people. It is totalitarian in that it views everything as political and holds that any action by the state is justified to achieve the common goal. It takes responsibility for all aspects of life, including our health and well-being, and seeks to impose uniformity of thought and action, whether by force or through regulation and social pressure. Everything, including economy and religion, must be aligned with its objectives. Any rival identity is part of the "problem" and therefore defined as the enemy. I will argue that contemporary American liberalism embodies all of these aspects of fascism... You can see why the Marxist left would resist the idea that Hitler was a revolutionary. Because if he was, then either Hitler was a force for good, or revolutions can be bad.
 * p. 63

What is Social Justice (2014)

 * "What is Social Justice?" (24 March 2014), Prager University

 * In short, “social justice” is code for good things no one needs to argue for -- and no one dare be against.

2018

 * I'll never tire of the people so vexed by me they have to insist I am irrelevant. I may be irrelevant, but I clearly matter to you.
 * Twitter post (7 September 2018)

 * The world's oldest globalist institution? Catholic church.
 * "The Remnant Tapes" (13 September 2018), National Review

 * States have a habit of forming when the rules say “line starts here for free stuff.” Whoever manages the line becomes the “state” after a while.
 * Twitter post (9 October 2018)

 * We often dismiss controversies or concerns by waving our hands and saying something like, “Oh, that’s merely symbolic,” as if the meaning we give to symbols is somehow irrelevant compared with more tangible things. But symbolism — the way we reduce broad concerns, agendas, and visions to images or rituals — has played a defining role in human life since there have been humans. Try burning a flag or a cross in front of the wrong audience and then tell me symbolism is nothing.
 * "The Border Wall Is a Symbol of Our Symbolic Politics" (28 December 2018), National Review

 * Both flag burners and flag wavers can agree on one thing: The flag has meaning beyond the merely instrumental necessity of having a piece of cloth that identifies a legal jurisdiction.
 * "The Power of Symbols in Our Politics of Digust" (28 December 2018), National Review

 * The rifts between Shia and Sunni, Eastern Orthodox and Catholic, Israelis and Palestinians, Tibetans and Chinese, obviously have real political, theological, or economic substance behind them, but they are often reduced to symbolism. If you study the history of nationalism, it is often a story of symbols. What flag shall we fly? What icon shall we mount? What books will we revere — or burn?
 * "The Border Wall Is a Symbol of Our Symbolic Politics" (28 December 2018), National Review

Andrew Breitbart would tell Steve Bannon to stay in Europe (2018)

 * "Andrew Breitbart would tell Steve Bannon to stay in Europe" (14 March 2018), The Los Angeles Times

 * One of the things that motivated my old friend Andrew Breitbart was his righteous indignation at being called a racist. That's a running theme in his book, "Righteous Indignation".
 * He would also advise conservatives not to be deterred if their opponents on the left unfairly called them racists — something he rightly believed happened all the time. Indeed, one of the things that got him out of bed in the morning was fighting the media-Democratic narrative that conservatives are all a bunch of racists.
 * In one famous episode, members of the Congressional Black Caucus walked through a crowd of tea party protesters seeking a provocation. Subsequently they claimed the attendants screamed the N-word and other epithets at them. The press reported it all as fact. Andrew, noting the sea of cameras and iPhones at the event, offered a $10,000 reward to anyone who could provide proof of the CBC's claims. No one came forward. That was the Andrew Breitbart I was proud to call my friend.
 * If Andrew were still around, I bet he'd tell Bannon to stay in Europe — and not just because his tendency to wear several shirts seems more consistent with European fashion. Bannon's understanding of conservatism is entirely European.
 * Conservatism in America has always been deeply traditionalist, sometimes too much so. But at the core of the modern conservative movement has been the effort to protect, defend and conserve the traditions of a liberal revolution, grounded in the best arguments of the enlightenment (slavery notwithstanding). Bannon's potted blood and soil nationalism and racially tinged populism runs counter to that project and the best and highest ideals of conservatism and America itself. He turned Andrew's Breitbart.com into a "platform" (his word) for the alt-right seeking to inject European swill into the American body politic. Let him stay in Europe and hand out torches for the marchers. His un-American schtick has no place here. I'm sure Andrew would agree.

War on the Right (2018)

 * "War on the Right" (4 May 2018), National Review

 * Life isn't binary — and neither is politics. If you are adrift in the ocean, your enemy isn’t just sharks; it’s thirst, hunger, drowning, and despair itself. If you face your predicament assuming the only thing you have to worry about is being eaten by a shark, you might fend off the sharks, but you will also probably die. Indeed, by ignoring other threats, you’d probably make yourself more vulnerable to a shark attack.

Are We to Blame for the Alex Jones Problem? (2018)

 * "Are We to Blame for the Alex Jones Problem?" (10 August 2018), National Review Online

 * [W]e live in a popular-front moment, where no one on “our side” is worth criticizing too much, if at all, and everyone on “their side” is evil. This has as much to do with ratings and page views as it does with ideology. Moths chase light, but the incentive for politicians, producers, and pundits is to follow the heat. I’m still torn over how people such as Mark Zuckerberg should deal with slanderous carnival barkers like Alex Jones. But I’m convinced a lot of people are to blame for the problem reaching Zuckerberg’s desk in the first place.

When Evil Becomes Inconvenient (2018)

 * "When Evil Becomes Inconvenient" (24 August 2018), National Review Online

 * [N]early every political evil can be found on display in China: slavery, discrimination, religious persecution, xenophobia, tyranny, mass-political indoctrination, colonialism, cultural genocide, and so on. And yet, the outcry against these things in America and the West is a tiny fraction of what it was with regard to South Africa in the 1980s or Israel today. Why? Some of the political answers are pretty obvious — and have much merit. A few that come to mind: China is non-Western, and many of these sins are supposed to be unique to white Europeans; China is a victim (or “victim”) of colonialism, and so we shouldn’t judge it harshly; China is very powerful, and realpolitik dictates that we be diplomatic; and so on.
 * The coalition instinct is the programming that helped us form strategic groups that advance our self-interest. We are a social species and cooperation is what helped us skyrocket to the top of the food chain.

Liberals' Irritable Mental Gestures (2018)

 * "Liberals’ Irritable Mental Gestures" (4 September 2018), National Review Online

 * [L]iberals are going to have to make peace with the possibility that their political enemies aren’t always the cartoon villains they so desperately want them to be.

Breaking democratic norms was rampant before the anonymous op-ed. Now it's a free-for-all (2018)

 * "Breaking democratic norms was rampant before the anonymous op-ed. Now it's a free-for-all" (11 September 2018), The Los Angeles Times

 * For Obama, and millions of liberals, Trump is the fruition of years of right-wing perfidy. He has more of a point than many of my colleagues on the right care to admit. For instance, I never subscribed to the “birther” conspiracy theory that Trump exploited to such effect, but I failed to appreciate the damage being done by letting it fester. But Obama also has a massive blind spot that many on the left share. The tit-for-tat dynamic of norm-breaking goes back decades, and Obama has played his part. When running for president in 2008 and 2012, Obama let his lieutenants demonize John McCain and Mitt Romney as racists.

 * Obama violated not just democratic norms but also his constitutional oath by effectively granting amnesty to millions of immigrants in the country illegally despite having insisted that he did not have the power to do so.

 * Pence has a point. But he has little standing to make it.

 * Falsely accusing critics of “treason,” castigating law-enforcement agencies for prosecuting allies, and telling police they should rough up suspects is inconsistent with Trump’s oath — and Pence’s. But these days, oaths, like norms, are for everybody else.

The Government Can’t Love You (2018)

 * "The Government Can’t Love You" (14 September 2018), The G-File, National Review Online

 * [S]egments of the Right, who denounced phrases like “economic patriotism” when it passed Barack Obama’s lips but nod and cheer when similar phrases come out of the mouths of “nationalists.” They see the state as the key to fostering a new social solidarity because it alone speaks for their new idol — or “strong god” — of the Nation. Passionate nationalists, like passionate socialists, ultimately believe that the State can love you, and if the right people take it over, the divisions that are inevitable in a free society will be knitted together by some government initiative. But that is not love, it is lust. It is a lust for power and victory for your vision over all others.

Socialism is So Hot Right Now (2018)

 * "Socialism is So Hot Right Now" (17 September 2018), Commentary

 * One common tactic [socialists like to use] is to point to countries that liberals like and dub them real-world models of socialism. Thus Scandinavian countries with generous social safety nets become the real-world proof that socialism works. Others will just point to government-run programs or institutions—national parks, the VA, whatever—and say “socialism!” (What about Venezuela? “Shut up,” they explain.)

 * [S]ocialism has never been a particularly stable or coherent program, a point I made in these pages in 2010. It has always been best defined as whatever socialists want it to be at any given moment. That is because its chief utility is as a romantic indictment of the capitalist status quo. As many of the defenders of the new socialist craze admit, socialism is the off-the-shelf alternative to capitalism, which has been in bad odor since at least the financial crisis of 2008.

 * [S]ocialism’s durability as a concept owes almost nothing to economics and almost everything to the desire for power...

 * [T]o talk about socialism as a function of practical politics means gliding past its underlying appeal. After all, there are countless other ideologies that can be similarly reduced to the desire for power expressed by certain elites or certain segments of the aggrieved masses themselves. The most obvious example is, of course, nationalism, which has more in common with socialism than is ordinarily believed. From the French Jacobins to the Italian Fascists, nationalists tend to be in favor of state-directed economics, the redistribution of wealth, and a collectivist or communal organization of society. What unites all of these movements is a sense that liberal democratic capitalism doesn’t provide a sense of social solidarity. It is too atomizing, too cut-throat, and mostly unconcerned with how we should all live together.

 * Socialism as a thoroughgoing system had failed. But the central emotion behind it had not. And that emotion has only deepened...

 * Millennials who supported Bernie Sanders almost certainly don’t care about the weedy specifics of his health-care plans. They do not want to live in a country with an economic system that could never have produced the iPhone or the Internet. What they want is a greater sense of social solidarity.

 * Capitalism—at least as Sanders & Co. understand it—is not fulfilling. It doesn’t provide a sense of meaning and solidarity. It rewards—in their minds—the few and punishes the many. There must be a better, more humane way, in which we’re all in it together and sacrifice is shared. The word “social” comes from the Latin socii, meaning allies. People want to feel that they are allied with one another, fighting toward a common goal together for the good of the tribe, marching to the same drumbeats. This is innate in us. Our tribal brains crave social solidarity every bit as much as our palates crave foods that are sweet, fatty, or salty. We can train ourselves to resist the cravings or channel them toward productive ends. But very few of us can eliminate the craving itself.

 * The problem is that the central government in a sprawling country of over 325 million can’t provide solidarity (without resorting to anti-democratic means)—only the institutions of civil society (faith, family, etc.) can fill the holes in our souls.

 * The major difference between the left and the right when it comes to any movement dedicated to overthrowing the free-market order—corporatist, authoritarian, etc.—is which groups will be the winners and which groups will be the losers. A left-wing system might empower labor leaders, government bureaucrats, progressive intellectuals, universities, certain minority groups, and one set of industries. A right-wing system might reward a different set of industries as well as traditional religious groups and their leaders, an ethnic majority, aristocrats, or perhaps rural interests. But both systems would be reactionary in the sense that they rejected the legacy of the Lockean revolution...

 * [W]hat makes a libertarian in America a “right-winger” makes him a “liberal” in most of Europe.

 * [C]apitalism is as much to blame for the consolidation and homogenization of nations as champions of progressive central planning are, if not more so.

 * As America’s Founders well understood, a society enjoying a multiplicity of institutions, interests, and intact communities (i.e., factions) is much more difficult to subjugate by a single central power, be it a king, a dictator, or a bureaucracy.

 * We can debate how much socialism there was in Hitler’s National Socialism. It is remarkable, however, that many of the people insisting that Norway or Sweden is obviously socialist even though they both are more free-market than Hitlerite Germany are aghast at the suggestion that the National Socialists were…socialists.

 * The sense of local community, the feeling of espirit de corps, the satisfaction one gets from belonging to a settled traditional or even tribal order, and the feeling of centeredness and place one gets in the family: These are all wonderful things. But they can, and often do, become poisonous, oppressive, and even tyrannical when the state tries to impose them on the entirety of society. When we try to make the macrocosm of society like the microcosm of the family or tribe, we destroy it every bit as much as when we try to make the microcosm operate according to the rules of the macrocosm.

Liberalism, Conservatism, and the End of History (2018)

 * "Liberalism, Conservatism, and the End of History" (17 September 2018), The Corner, National Review Online

 * After the rise of socialism and the retreat of monarchical and clerical rule, liberalism became, in effect, the new conservatism in that it took on the mantle of the status quo.

It's Wrong to Assume Kavanaugh Would Be a Partisan Justice (2018)

 * "It's Wrong to Assume Kavanaugh Would Be a Partisan Justice" (5 October 2018), National Review

 * Progressives have won so many policy battles by relying on activist courts to do things they could not achieve at the ballot box, they’ve come to see an activist Supreme Court as a birthright. As a result, the Court has been politicized far more than it should be.

The Price of Victory (2018)

 * "The Price of Victory" (5 October 2018), The G-File, National Review Online

 * Judges are not typically expected to remain dispassionate when they’ve been accused of gang rape, nor should they be.

If You Think Our Politics Can’t Get Uglier Than the Kavanaugh Fight, Think Again (2018)

 * "If You Think Our Politics Can’t Get Uglier Than the Kavanaugh Fight, Think Again" (10 October 2018), National Review

 * This is how we got here. It will get worse because there are no incentives to be better. It won’t end well either, but at least it will feel familiar.

Nikki Haley's Excellent Timing (2018)

 * "Nikki Haley's Excellent Timing" (12 October 2018), National Review

 * [T]he U.N. is the best arena in the world for picking the right enemies.

A Free People Must Be Virtuous (2018)

 * "A Free People Must Be Virtuous" (14 October 2018), G-File, National Review Online

 * At the end of the day, happiness is derived from love — love for others and others’ love for you. When I say “love” I do not mean simply romantic love, though that is obviously one of the greatest wellsprings of true happiness. I mean the love one feels from friends, and the love for places and things that brings people together for shared purpose.

 * The modern doctrines of diversity and multiculturalism are a kind of homogenizing totalitarianism. Its acolytes want every institution to be filled with people who look different but think alike. What our society needs is not more “diversity” of this sort but more variety. Different communities and institutions need to be able live differently, because it is only with this kind of variety that a diverse people can find places where they all feel at home and where they can all find a kind of meaning that suits them as individuals.

 * [I]nstitutions and communities need to be able to exploit their comparative advantages. It’s not just that the Marine Corps demands more from its members than the Peace Corps; it’s that the Marines demand different things. For some people, being a Marine would be a kind of living Hell; for others it is a reason to live. That’s what the individual pursuit of happiness means.

 * One of the great things about liberalism is that it allows for more paths for just that pursuit. In tribal society, there was little to no division of labor beyond what was rooted in age and sex. In feudal monarchies and modern totalitarianisms alike, there is division of labor, but it is imposed on people by rulers: “You will be a soldier.” “You will be a fry cook.” “You were born to be a slave or a serf.” In a free society, you have choice. It’s not perfect: You can’t choose to be a Marine if you do not meet the requirements, but you are free to try.

 * [T]here has never been a society in all of human history where the average person did not have to work. Sure, some crapulent prince could lay around all day and do nothing, but everyone else had to till the soil or pound the anvil or carry a spear.

 * [W]ork is good. Work is virtuous and inculcates virtue. Work gives people a sense of meaning and of being needed. Obviously, not everyone feels such satisfaction in the job they have now, but that dissatisfaction is precisely the motivation people need to find the job that might provide it. That motivation inspires virtue, too.

 * Some people work just to make the money to support the other things in their life that provide meaning, be it a family or a cause or a hobby that may seem silly to you or me but is central to their individual pursuit of happiness. Some people don’t work for money at all. Priests, stay-at-home parents, and volunteers in a thousand different institutions aren’t pursuing wealth; they are pursuing meaning through love and love through meaning.

 * [S]ocialists are romantics in that they want to curate their lives entirely based on their own feelings.

 * The only society in which it is remotely possible for people to design their lives in the manner Marx fantasizes is one that is incredibly rich and incredibly free. We are nowhere near there yet, but it’s worth pointing out that if you plucked any laborer from another era and toured him or her around America today, they’d think that we were remarkably close.

Say No to a Parliament of Tribes (2018)

 * "Say No to a Parliament of Tribes" (15 October 2018), The Corner, National Review Online

 * I understand that identity-politics arguments are supposed to trump everything else these days, but the idea that all Americans of Asian, black, and Hispanic heritage have homogeneous political interests and identities is both ridiculous and grotesque.

 * Everyone’s decrying tribalism, and yet the idea that we should rejigger the constitutional order to make sure that Asian Americans in California have the same “representation” in the Senate as Hispanics in, say, Texas or Rhode Island is profoundly tribal. Maybe Hispanics in Texas have different political interests than Hispanics in California? Maybe Hispanics — an incredibly diverse category of people — don’t vote based upon an abstract designation?

 * [B]ending the system to the idea that the government in Washington should see the country as a bunch of competing racial and ethnic groups with no particular or meaningful attachment to place and community, whose only relationship to government is unmediated through state and local government, is precisely the sort of thinking that Arthur Schlesinger lamented... If it makes you sad that California doesn’t have more clout in the Senate, fine. But playing statistical games based on race and ethnicity is a pernicious way of approaching that problem.

2019

 * Look, I know very well there are many kinds of socialism. But wherever socialism has teeth, it veers closer to gangsterism because it depends on the use of arbitrary power, either by the state or, in essence, the mob. If you really want economic equality, you need to take money from people who earned it and give it to, or spend it on, people who didn’t. “Fighting income inequality” doesn’t change the fact that the state is using force based upon an aesthetic conceit about how society should look.
 * "The Failure of the Deal" (15 February 2019), National Review

 * Keeping Germany from acting too German (or at least too Prussian) is an important lesson of history.
 * "Nationalism and Nationism" (3 April 2019), National Review

 * The piece was opinion, the news was fact captured on film.
 * Twitter post (9 August 2019)

What's So Great About Western Civilization (2019)

 * "What’s So Great about Western Civilization" (19 April 2019), National Review

 * One of the things I tell new parents is something that was told to me when my daughter still had that new-baby smell: “Prepare for long days but short years.” No statement more succinctly captures the exhaustion, excitement, and melancholy nostalgia that come with parenthood. I have no doubt whole books have not covered it more eloquently.

 * [T]he immediate assumption that praise for, or pride in, Western civilization is a species of bigotry and racism is a perfect example of the sort of civilizational suicide I describe in my own book on the subject.

 * But the weird thing is that many of the people who are outraged by benign nationalism or the benign pan-nationalism that is pride in Western civilization take no umbrage when someone from Iran or China says they think their civilization is best. This of course is a manifestation of the ancient cult of identitarianism, which the best traditions of the West have battled internally at great cost for thousands of years. Saying Western civilization is great hurts the feelings of some people invested in some other source of identity. And it hurts the feelings of some Westerners because they think it’s a sign of enlightenment to get offended on other people’s behalf or to denigrate the society that gave them their soap box.

 * We “borrow” stuff from other cultures constantly, starting with Christianity itself. This is particularly true of America, which is why our menus read like the requested meal plans from a meeting of the U.N. General Assembly. This profound lack of self-awareness manifests itself most acutely among progressives who wear their Europe-envy on their sleeves. Oh, they’re so much more civilized over there. Well, what civilization do you think “over there” is part of?

 * The way you sustain and improve upon a culture is by fostering a sense of gratitude for what is best about it. You celebrate the good in your story while putting the bad in the correct context. Conservatism is gratitude...

Quotes about Jonah Goldberg

 * So I had basically caught the editors of the National Review in bald-faced lies about taking money from Big Tech companies like Google to remain silent while those same Big Tech companies censored and de-platformed other conservatives. This was, of course, an unconscionable betrayal for The Flagship Conservative Magazine to commit against its own readers — but they did it anyway. Meanwhile, I was hearing from sources close to the National Review Board that the loss of donors and subscribers was so serious that drastic action would need to be taken. (The magazine had lost about half of its subscriber base in less than two years.) The board was also adamant that Jonah Goldberg and David French were the main culprits behind the astonishing collapse of the magazine's influence, and that they needed to go. Everybody wanted them off the masthead in order to survive.
 * Emerald Robinson, How The National Review Sold Its Soul to Google, Substack, 31 August 2021

 * Goldberg was very touchy about the idea that he had been removed from the magazine. He wanted people to know that it was his idea to leave the National Review to fax out a newsletter from his basement (with no name and no money) along with Stephen Hayes. The Drag Queen Story Hour enthusiast David French even tweeted: "There's news. There's fake news. Then there's the absolute premium-grade BS I'm reading on MAGA Twitter and elsewhere claiming that Jonah Goldberg was pushed out of National Review. Completely, totally false." What made this so funny was that David French was himself removed from the magazine a few months later! Where did he go? Well, he went to work for Jonah Goldberg and Stephen Hayes and their little newsletter of course. The three of them were now free to plummet into new depths of unpopularity together. The most intellectually bankrupt and vitriolic of the Never Trumpers had finally been thrown into the dustbin of history.
 * Emerald Robinson, How The National Review Sold Its Soul to Google, Substack, 31 August 2021

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: Jonah Goldberg


text:
Christiaan Huygens

Christiaan Huygens (14 April 1629 – 8 July 1695) was a Dutch mathematician, astronomer, physicist, probabilist and horologist. His 1673 scientific masterpiece was Horologium Oscillatorium, a treatise on the mathematical theory and applications of the isochronous pendulum clock, which led to improved accuracy in the measurement of time. He is also noted for his opposition to the Newtonian corpuscular theory of light, providing a longitudinal wave theory which hypothesized propagation by spherical waves emitted along a wave front.

Quotes
ordered chronologically

 * ...the power of this line [the cycloid] to measure time.
 * Horologium Oscillatorium (1673) as quoted by Joella G. Yoder, "Christiaan Huygens, Book on the Pendulum Clock" in Landmark Writings in Western Mathematics 1640-1940 ed., Ivor Grattan-Guinness (2005)

 * I believe that we do not know anything for certain, but everything probably.
 * Letter to Pierre Perrault, 'Sur la préface de M. Perrault de son traité de l'Origine des fontaines' (1673), Oeuvres Complètes de Christiaan Huygens (1897), Vol. 7, 298. Quoted in Jacques Roger, The Life Sciences in Eighteenth-Century French Thought, ed. Keith R. Benson and trans. Robert Ellrich (1997), 163

 * I do not mind at all that [Newton] is not a Cartesian provided he does not offer us suppositions like that of attraction.
 * Letter to Fatio de Duillier (11 July 1687), quoted in René Dugas, Mechanics in the seventeenth century (1958), p. 440

 * One finds in this subject a kind of demonstration which does not carry with it so high a degree of certainty as that employed in geometry; and which differs distinctly from the method employed by geometers in that they prove their propositions by well-established and incontrovertible principles, while here principles are tested by inferences which are derivable from them. The nature of the subject permits of no other treatment. It is possible, however, in this way to establish a probability which is little short of certainty. This is the case when the consequences of the assumed principles are in perfect accord with the observed phenomena, and especially when these verifications are numerous; but above all when one employs the hypothesis to predict new phenomena and finds his expectations realized.
 * Treatise on Light (1690) - preface, Translated by Michael R. Matthews, Scientific Background to Modern Philosophy. 1989. p. 126

 * I had not thought of this regular decrease of gravity, namely that it is as the inverse square of the distance; this is a new and highly remarkable property of gravity.
 * (1691) quoted in Popular Astronomy, Vol. 56 (1948), pp. 189–190.

 * I esteem his [Newton's] understanding and subtlety highly, but I consider that they have been put to ill use in the greater part of this work, where the author studies things of little use or when he builds on the improbable principle of attraction.
 * (1692) writing five years after the appearance of Newton's Principia, as quoted in A. R. Manwell, Mathematics Before Newton (Oxford University Press, 1959), p. 56 – «He [Huygens] said, indeed, that the idea of universal attraction [gravitation] 'appears to me absurd'.»

Cosmotheoros (1695; publ. 1698)

 * As quoted in the English translation The Celestial Worlds Discover'd (1722) unless otherwise noted.

 * A Man that is of Copernicus’s Opinion, that this Earth of ours is a Planet, carry’d round and enlighten’d by the Sun, like the rest of the Planets, cannot but sometimes think, that it’s not improbable that the rest of the Planets have their Dress and Furniture, and perhaps their Inhabitants too as well as this Earth of ours...
 * Book 1, p. 1

 * It's evident God had no design to make a particular Enumeration in the Holy Scriptures, of all the Works of his Creation.
 * Book 1, p. 7

 * These Gentlemen must be told, that they take too much upon themselves when they pretend to appoint how far and no farther Men shall go in their Searches, and to set bounds to other Mens Industry; as if they knew the Marks that God has placed to Knowledge...
 * Book 1, p. 8

 * There are many degrees of Probable, some nearer Truth than others, in the determining of which lies the chief exercise of our Judgment.
 * Book 1, p. 10

 * Here we may mount from this dull Earth, and viewing it from on high, consider whether Nature has laid out all her Cost and Finery upon this small Speck of Dirt.
 * Book 1, p. 10

 * We shall be less apt to admire what this World calls Great, shall nobly despise those Trifles the generality of Men set their Affections on, when we know that there are a multitude of such Earths inhabited and adorned as Well as our own.
 * Book 1, p. 11

 * Now since in so many Things they... agree, what can be more probable than that in others they agree too; and that the other Planets are as beautiful and as well stock'd with Inhabitants as the Earth? Or what shadow of Reason can there be why they should not?
 * Book 1, p. 18

 * Since 'tis certain that Earth and Jupiter have their Water and Clouds, there is no reason why the other Planets should be without them. I can't say that they are exactly of the same nature with our Water; but that they should be liquid their use requires, as their beauty does that they be clear. This Water of ours, in Jupiter or Saturn, would be frozen up instantly by reason of the vast distance of the Sun. Every Planet therefore must have its own Waters of such a temper not liable to Frost.
 * Book I, p. 27

 * What a wonderful and amazing Scheme have we here of the magnificent Vastness of the Universe! So many Suns, so many Earths, and every one of them stock’d with so many Herbs, Trees and Animals, and adorn’d with so many Seas and Mountains! And how must our wonder and admiration be encreased when we consider the prodigious distance and multitude of the Stars?
 * Quam mirabilis igitur, quamque stupenda mundi amplitudo, & magnificentia jam mente concipienda est. Tot Soles, tot Terrae atque harum unaquaeque tot herbis, arboribus, animalibus, tot maribus, montibusque exornata. Et erit etiam unde augeatur admiratio, si quis ea quae de fixarum Stellarum distantia, & multitudine hisce addimus, pependerit.
 * Book 2, pp. 150-151

Disputed

 * The world is my country, to promote science is my religion.
 * The earliest found citation is in K.O. Meinsma, Spinoza en zijn kring. Historisch-kritische studiën over Hollandsche vrijgeesten (Martinus Nijhoff, 's-Gravenhage, 1896). This influential study was translated in French and German, but not in English. In the original Dutch context it seems as though this is not a quote from Huygens, but a characterisation by the author (Meinsma) of what 'could haven been' Huygens' devise.
 * In Cosmos: A Personal Voyage (Episode 6) from 1980 it is phrased The world is my country, science my religion.
 * Also in The Making of Modern Europe, 1648-1780 (1985) by Geoffrey Treasure, p. 474, it is declared that this was Huygens' "motto" — but this seems very similar to the much more famous and long attested declaration of Thomas Paine in Rights of Man (1791): "My country is the world, and my religion is to do good" which has long been paraphrased "The world is my country, and to do good is my religion."

Quotes about Huygens

 * Like Hooke, Huygens made fundamental improvements to the clock as a time-keeping mechanism; and Hooke invented the first passable for the same purpose. ...Huygens discovered the rings of Saturn, and the formula for centrifugal force. He did important work in mechanics and optics, and one of his merits was that he made young Leibnitz enthusiastic for these subjects.
 * Jacob Bronowski The Common Sense of Science (1951) "The Scientific Revolution and the Machine."

 * Having converted Galileo's discovery of the isochronism of the pendulum into an accurate timepiece in 1656, Huygens had, in 1662, developed a marine variation employing a short pendulum which had subsequently been subjected to tests at sea with the aid of the English. News of the device having come to Colbert... the new director of France's economic life was determined to secure its advantages for his nation. Accordingly, Huygens was lured to Paris in 1665.
 * Seymour Chapin, "The Men from Across La Manche: French Voyages, 1670-1790" in Background to Discovery: Pacific Exploration from Dampier to Cook (1990) ed., Derek Howse

 * The academicians—especially in the person of Picard—were carrying through a revolution in observational astronomy made possible by Huygens' astronomical pendulum clock, the filar micrometer perfected (if not invented) by Auzout, and the application of telescopes to large-scale graduated instruments appropriate for the measure of small angles. It was with this equipment that Picard undertook to measure the distance between two localities approximately on the meridian of Paris, to determine the differences in their latitudes, and to deduce from those results the length of degree of meridian. The eminently successful arc measure, marked by a precision thirty to forty times greater than any previously achieved...
 * Seymour Chapin, "The Men from Across La Manche: French Voyages, 1670-1790" in Background to Discovery: Pacific Exploration from Dampier to Cook (1990) ed., Derek Howse

 * Mons. Huygens found out a Method whereby the Ball of a Pendulum may be always carried along the Arch of a Cycloid.
 * John Keill, "An introduction to natural philosophy" (1745)

 * Huygens stated everything verbally when he was in his "geometric mode" and used [mathematical] symbols... only when he switched to his "algebraic mode." Facile mathematician that he was, he switched back and forth between the two modes as his needs changed within the same problem...
 * Joella G. Yoder, Unrolling Time: Christiaan Huygens and the Mathematization of Nature (2004)

 * One of the masterpieces of seventeenth-century scientific literature was... published in 1673 under the title Horologium Oscillatorium (The Pendulum Clock). Much more than a mere description of a clock... it was in fact a treatise on the accelerated motion of a falling body, as exemplified by the bob of a pendulum clock. ...The culminating proposition is Huygen's proof that a body falling along an inverted cycloid reaches the bottom in a fixed amount of time. In other words, the cycloid is isochronous. The third section... introduces his theory of evolutes... that, among other applications, allows one to find the length of a curve. Using evolutes... he proves mathematically that the cycloidal-shaped plates will force the bob of the pendulum to move along the isochronous cycloidal path. The fourth... section... presents his theory of the compound pendulum, in which the motion of a pendulum with mass distributed along its length is compared with that of an ideal simple pendulum... The last part of the book introduces... a variant of a conical clock in which the pendulum, instead of swinging, rotates about a vertical axis... kept on an isochronous path... by the theory of evolutes.
 * Joella G. Yoder, Unrolling Time: Christiaan Huygens and the Mathematization of Nature (2004)

 * This [Horologium Oscillatorium] is the first modern treatise in which a physical problem is idealized by a set of parameters then analyzed mathematically. It is one of the seminal works of applied mathematics.
 * Joella G. Yoder, "Christiaan Huygens, Book on the Pendulum Clock" in Landmark Writings in Western Mathematics 1640-1940 ed., Ivor Grattan-Guinness (2005)

 * Foremost, Huygens gave us precise time. His clocks were the first timekeepers to be accurate enough to be reliable in scientific experiments.
 * Joella G. Yoder, "Christiaan Huygens, Book on the Pendulum Clock" in Landmark Writings in Western Mathematics 1640-1940 ed., Ivor Grattan-Guinness (2005)

 * The lasting importance of Horologium Oscillatorium stemmed more from its applied mathematics than from its pure mathematics. The next generation of mathematicians spent a great deal of time trying to find curves that satisfied specific physical properties. What other curve, if any, is a tautochrone? What curve does a hanging chain delineate? What shape does a sail take? What is the curve of fastest descent? These were the test cases for the new mathematical technique Leibniz called 'calculus.'
 * Joella G. Yoder, "Christiaan Huygens, Book on the Pendulum Clock" in Landmark Writings in Western Mathematics 1640-1940 ed., Ivor Grattan-Guinness (2005)

title: Christiaan Huygens


text:
Rocko's Modern Life

Rocko's Modern Life is an American animated series premiered on September 18, 1993 to November 24, 1996. The series follows a Wallaby named Rocko and his friends, Heffer and Filburt.

Carnival Knowledge [1.1a]

 * ["Note: first lines (in-production only) in the series", We see an animal riding on a roller coaster that looks like a bathtub prolongs the scream right before the next scene shows a kid crying over his spilled ice cream. A wallaby and a steer cow arrive and come across a carnival]
 * Rocko: Heffer, we're mates, right?

 * Heffer: You know for a second there I thought those carny games were rigged.
 * Rocko: Not everyone is out to rip you off.
 * Heffer: You have to learn to trust people.

Sand In Your Navel [1.1b]

 * Rocko: Spunky, well, I guess we better find a hose to wash off.
 * [A flock of seagulls floats down and eats the food that Rocko and Spunky are buried in, inadvertently biting them as well.]
 * Rocko: Or maybe just some iodine.

A Sucker for the Suck-O-Matic [1.2a]

 * [We see a mailbox, this says "Rocko + Spunky" the camera pans up to Rocko's house, fade to the window, a steer cow named Heffer Wolfe is seen watching TV, eating food]
 * Rocko Rama: [first lines (in-broadcast only) in the series, his voice is heard] I had it with you, you're a useless and pathetic like a USELESS AND PATHETIC thing, [A Wallaby named Rocko Rama is seen angry and is shown talking] this is the last straw you Good for nothing heap of rubbish! [holds up a hammer and starts hitting the suk-u-lox] Prepare to FEEL MY WRATH! [The bull terrier dog is named Spunky gets afraid] That will teach you!
 * Heffer Wolfe: Hey man, keep it down. [is seen watching a bowling show on tv] I'm trying to watch TV.

 * Rocko: I must cease this senseless sucking. It's stuck in suck!
 * Rocko and Heffer: (reading) "How to turn off your Suck-o-Matic..." [the page gets sucked up, and the page that reads...] ..."In case Suck-o-Matic sucks instructions, see page 101..." [another page gets ripped and is sucked, a page shows a skull on fire] "PREAPRE TO DIE?!?!?!" [Rocko, Heffer and Spunky scream as eyes bulge in horror]

Canned [1.2b]

 * [The episode opens with the Super Lot-O-Comics]
 * Filburt Shellbach: [voice is heard only] The problem with the comic books is the ink comes off on your hands. [we see a turtle named Filburt Turtle talking to Rocko] Everytime you turn a page, you have to wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. You turn a page, you wash your hands. And then you turn a page...
 * [The speaker starts coughing on Rocko]
 * Speaker: Rocko, to the... [coughs] ...Manager's Office. [then it finishes coughing]
 * Filburt: They've hurt very much and, um, I'm constantly in a state of wanting to throw up.
 * Geek: You'll never be satisfied with a moral woman because the elf wenches are so beautiful You'll spend the rest of your life searching for that same beauty again. [sniffs] Yes.
 * Nuclear Swan Elephant: Wow, you're and idiot.

Rocko's Happy Sack [1.3a]

 * Filburt: And your total is... [...the cash register shows "$1.50"]
 * Rocko: Phew!
 * [Then the total suddenly increases]
 * Filburt: One hundred and fifty dollars. Gee, looks like you just missed a big sale. Have a nice day.
 * Rocko: [snarls and gets bombs in his eyes, enraged and loses it] You CHEAP LITTLE ROTTER! I've been run over by a car, made to drag around a gimp shopping cart, threatened by your Gestapo security guards, had me head set on fire, I was attacked by wild lobsters, beaten by a very large woman, had me dog wrapped in plastic, nearly starved to death, and I still beat the 12:00 deadline! So if you don't change that total back to $1.50,   I WILL DO SOMETHING NOT NICE!!!!!

Who's For Dinner? [1.4a]

 * Heffer: You're not my father! you're just a jerk in wolf's clothing! [starts bawling and runs out of the front door]
 * [The Wolfe family glares at Rocko]
 * Rocko: Well, [chuckles] I'm stuffed.

 * Heffer: I guess no one loves me.

Leap Frogs [1.6a]

 * [Mr. Bighead gets hit by Cupid's arrow]
 * Ed: (seductively) Bev...
 * Bev: Yes, Ed...
 * Ed: We're almost out of mouthwash

Bedfellows [1.6b]

 * [Ed is spying on Rocko's backyard, where a nudist party is being held]
 * Ed Bighead: Bev! Oh, I can't believe it! Do you know what that weirdo next door is up to?
 * Bev Bighead: Oh, shut up and mind your own business, Ed.
 * Ed Bighead: But, Bev! They're, well... Nude!
 * [Bev grabs the binoculars]
 * Bev Bighead: Oh, Ed! Oh, you're right! Oh, yes! This is disgusting! Quick, Ed, get the telescope out of the hall closet!

No Pain, No Gain [1.7a]

 * Heffer: Ooh... buttons!
 * [Heffer pushes one button and it ends up freezing Rocko. He pushes another button and it heats Rocko making him sweat. He is about to push another one.]
 * Rocko: Heffer, no, not that one!
 * [Heffer pushes the attendant button and it ends up ejecting the co-pilot.]
 * Rocko: That one must be broken.

Who Gives A Buck [1.7b]

 * Heffer: I couldn't help myself. When I found out you were gonna lose everything, I went out and got the last one!
 * Rocko: Heffer, you're a pal! But wait, you don't have any money. Hey! You didn't use credit, did you?
 * Heffer: Heck, no. Only an idiot would use credit. I used this! [pulls out a card]
 * Rocko: [reading card] "The All Scottish Show Organ Exchange Program"?
 * Heffer: I sold my second stomach for cash!

Dirty Dog [1.8b]

 * Squirmy: Here we are, Mr. Icck. Fried lice fritters!
 * Bloaty: Mmm. Boy, uh, does that look good.
 * Mr. Icck: It better be good, Bloatman, or it's back to the colon mines for you!
 * Bloaty: (nervously) The colon mines. Right, boss.

 * Mr. Icck: You're FIRED! I mean, THE END!

Keeping Up With the Bigheads [1.9a]

 * Rocko: That's it! There's only so much a wallaby can take! Not only will this house not be torn down, but it will be the nicest house on the street! Even nicer than yours!
 * Mr. Bighead: [laughs] Stop! Stop! I might wet myself! [keeps laughing, but then piddles] Oops.

Power Trip [1.11a]

 * Rocko: FILBURT!
 * Filburt: Yes boss?
 * Rocko: I want to see you in my office IMMEDIATELY!
 * Filburt: Yes boss! [uses his teeth to drag himself to the office and he arrives in the office]
 * Rocko: Supply and demand, Filburt; supply and demand. People demand "Big Man" comics, and we supply them. If you, Filburt can't supply "Big Man", the system breaks down. Do you follow me Filburt!?
 * Filburt: Yes sir.
 * Rocko: If the system breaks down, I DON’T MAKE A PROFIT!  DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS!!?
 * Filburt: No...? [Rocko turns around and shows Rocko is now the same shape and size Mr. Smitty is and Filburt screams in horror]
 * Rocko:   YOU'RE         FIRED!!!!!
 * [Rocko's breath sends away Filburt down the stairs, out of the shop and into the street. Random vehicles run over Filburt]
 * Filburt: Where are you, Really Really Big Man?

I Have No Son! [2.1]

 * Sock puppet: PINEAPPLES!
 * Rollo: Oh, boy! When're we gonna have pineapples, mate?
 * Rollo and the Fatheads: (laugh) Goodnight, hosers.

Pipe Dreams [2.2a]

 * Rocko: [stiltedly] Hey, Heffer, how can we possibly fix this mess quickly and inexpensively?
 * Heffer: [also stiltedly] Good question, Rocko! Why don't we try new Tropical Plumber?
 * [Hef squeezes a tube and the bathroom becomes an island paradise with some singing fruits.]
 * Fruits: Tropical plumber, eh!
 * Unclog your pipes today!
 * Tropical Plumber, eh!
 * There ain't no better way!
 * [repeat until Spunky eats the fruit]

Tickled Pinky [2.2b]

 * Dr. Hutchison: Rocko?
 * Rocko: Dr. Hutchison? I thought you were a dentist.
 * Dr. Hutchison: I was, but I got tired of always looking "down in the mouth"! (giggles) Dental humor!

Boob Tubed [2.5a]

 * Spider: Well, out with it! What the heck do you want?!
 * Rocko: Well, actually, we have a... really odd request. You see, um...
 * Spider: Don't tell me, you came to get your buddy's brain back.
 * Rocko and Filburt: Yeah yeah yeah yeah, yeah!
 * Spider: I'd be glad to give it back to ya! Help yourselves! I wish you kids would stop sitting so close!

Commuted Sentence [2.5b]

 * [When Rocko is later for work too many times.]
 * Mr. Smitty: I've tolerated your laziness for the last time, Rocko. If you are late again, consider yourself TERMINATED!!! Clear?
 * Rocko: Crystal.

 * [Impound Lot, everyone else is in line to get their cars back. In front of the line is a disgruntled Mr. Smitty who had parked in a no parking zone.]
 * Mr. Smitty: I want my car back and I want it, NOW!
 * Impound Lot Director: Let's take a look at this chart, shall we?
 * [He sternly pulls down the chart and Mr. Smitty frowns.]

Rocko's Modern Christmas!: Can't Squeeze Cheer From a Cheese Log [2.6]

 * Filburt: Welcome to Pine Palace!
 * Rocko: Filburt, you're selling trees?
 * Filburt: Shush! Don't interrupt my sales pitch

Hut Sit Raw [2.7a]

 * Heffer: I got all the essentials: Marshmallows, potato chips, Pasture Puffies, cheese...
 * Rocko: Where's your sleeping bag?
 * Heffer: What?! There's no beds?!

 * Rocko: Ah, the great outdoors. Smell that mountain air, boys.
 * Filburt: Actually, that's my pine-scented air freshener for the tent.

 * Rocko: This is where the lightweights camp! Sissies, fat tourists, and couch potatoes!
 * Heffer: Great! So we can drop our stuff here?

 * Filburt: We can't drink that water!
 * Rocko: Why not?
 * Filburt: Fish are dating in it!

Born to Spawn [2.9a]

 * Newscaster: We interrupt our regularly scheduled program to give you this O-Town special report. A crazed turtle has just hijacked the Jolly Roberts seafood restaurant in the marina.
 * Rocko and Heffer: What the?
 * Newscaster: Witnesses say the alleged turtle kept screaming... [looking at his script] "Fish... sticks... fish sticks," as he forced patrons out the backdoor to safety.
 * Eyewitness: It was awful. Awful. He was CRAZY! Tartar sauce everywhere! Craziest turtle I ever seen! FISH STICKS! FISH STICKS! AHH!!!!
 * Rocko and Heffer: Filburt!

Hair Licked [2.10a]

 * Rocko: Well, Heff, how's it look?
 * Heffer: Paper or plastic?

Gutter Balls [2.10b]

 * Virginia: I'm taking my ball and going home. You won't have Virginia Wolfe to kick around anymore!
 * Heffer: Bye, Mom!
 * Mr. Bighead: Fine! We'll be able to win without you! Right, girls? Girls?
 * Tammy and Mrs. Bighead: Get a life, Ed!
 * Tammy: You've taken all the joy out of the game.
 * Mr. Bighead: This is mutiny!
 * Tammy: If you want that trophy so bad, Bozo, finish the game yourself!
 * Mr. Bighead: I don't need any of you.

Day of the Flecko [2.10b]

 * Flecko: Wait... Wait a minute, big guy. You don't wanna do that. I got kids. Millions of 'em. They'll be orphans. Never getting to play catch with old Dad. No one to tuck 'em in at night. Please, Mister!
 * Rocko: [sobbing, in a puddle of tears] Please, please, stop. I can't take anymore. You're free to go, Mr. Fly. Run along and take care of your family.
 * [Flecko pokes Rocko in the eye.]
 * Flecko: You were gonna kill me, ya big jerk!

Short Story [2.13a]

 * Rocko: I wish I was really big.
 * Tyrone: [taps his wand on Rocko's forehead, granting his wish] Done. [poofs away]
 * Rocko: [starts growing at a slow rate and becomes 50 feet tall] Wow! This is great. [looks down at Spunky, shaking fearfully at his height] Don't be afraid, Spunky. It's only me. [picks up Spunky and puts him in his shirt pocket] There you go, my little pal. Smell that fresh air.

Ed is Dead: A Thriller! [3.1b]

 * Heffer: [imitating Hitchcock] Good evening. [puffs out chest] Tonight's selections is a chilling tale of mayhem, shrubbery, and a wallaby who knew too much. [puffs out chest] So without further ado, we bring you... [normal voice] Just a second. [runs backstage to open the curtains, back to Hitch voice] "Ed is Dead"

Old Fogey Froggy [3.4b]

 * Bev: Oh, I'm so glad you could make it.
 * Rocko: It was the least we can do.
 * Bev: [as Filburt gives her flowers] Won't you come in?
 * [The trio went with Bev and the bed is a stressful, not-up, Ed Bighead]
 * Rocko: Did he go peacefully?
 * Bev: Yes, he just kind of drifted off and... and... that was it.
 * Heffer: He looks all warm and sticky.
 * Bev: Oh Ed, You were so convinced that you were old that you wished yourself to death. [cries]
 * Filburt: Well, no sense In dragging this out, let's get to the good part.
 * Heffer: [about to lift up the bed] One... two... three... LIFT! [lifts up the mattress and Ed slides down and falls into the trash can]
 * Filburt: And now, for the appropriate dirge.
 * [Bev starts crying uncontrollably as Heffer, Filburt, Rocko and she walk outside]
 * Heffer and Filburt: [sings the wedding march while Bev continues crying] Da dum da-dum! Da da-da-dum!
 * Rocko: [takes off his hat] We have gathered here today to pay our last week's day to our beloved Ed Bighead, wasted away his entire life worrying about how old he was. Heff [Heffer holds up the lid to the trash can] Lid. [then Heffer puts the lid in the trash can] Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. We stick Ed Bighead in the Earth's crust.
 * [Heffer kicks the trash can with Ed Bighead in it to the hole that was dug up, making the latter groan in pain while Rocko, Heffer, Filburt and Bev cry wildly together]
 * Rocko, Heffer, Filburt and Bev: [start sobbing wildly] WAAAAAAA-HAAAA-HAAAA-HAAAAA-HAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Camera Shy [3.6a]

 * Heffer: Okay, Rocko, do that goofy face you make when you're buying eggs.
 * [Heffer and Filburt are about to film Rocko walking downstairs in the night for a glass of milk.]
 * Filburt: He's not dressed for the occasion, if you know what I mean.
 * Heffer: You heard right! He's completely...naked!

Dear John [3.8a]

 * Rocko: My living room, it's a bathroom. My closet is a bathroom. My basement is a bathroom! My ballroom is a bathroom! Even my bathroom is a bathroom! Well, I guess that's okay. THERE'S TOO MANY BATHROOMS!!!!
 * Bucky: Too many bathrooms? What do you mean? You can never have too many bathrooms.
 * Rocko: [enraged] GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, YOU WACKO!!!

Fortune Cookie [3.8b]

 * Filburt: It is only a stupid fortune cookie. I should listen to Rocko more often.

 * Filburt: THEY ALL SAY THE SAME THING! No matter what I do, the fortune is always the same! [breaks down, sadly] I'll never win Mega-Spin.

Wacky Deli [3.11]

 * Rocko: O-kay! So Betty wakes up and says "Oh, what a beautiful day". And then the telephone...
 * Heffer: Or doorbell!
 * Rocko: Or doorbell ringing, and she answers it and says "Hello?" And then the salami...
 * Filburt: Or cheese!
 * Rocko: [getting angry] Or cheese says "I hate bologna" and attacks her through the phone before belching while all the stuff comes out of his mouth while we hold on him for a long time!
 * [He struggles to contain his anger]
 * Rocko: ... Okey-dokey? So... then... she walks up to the counter, and...
 * Heffer: HOLD IT!
 * Rocko: [furious] WHAT?!
 * Heffer: Hmm... y'know, I was thinkin'...
 * Rocko: [at the limits of his patience] Yeeeeesss?!
 * Heffer: ...Do we really need the cheese at all?
 * Filburt: Why, you big stupid cow.
 * Heffer: What? What'd I say?
 * Filburt: Why do you torment me like this?
 * Heffer: I'd probably do now!
 * Filburt: Just let me do it the way I want it!

Pranksters [4.3a]

 * Heffer: [repeated line] Yes, Granny Rocko.

From Here to Maternity [4.3b]

 * Filburt: [imitating Rocko] "Hey, look, fellas! I'm in jail! Heh heh..."
 * Rocko: Oh, come on, Filburt.
 * Filburt: Back off, Peter Cottontail! You're the reason we're in this mess!

 * Dr. Hutchinson: Hi honey, how are you? Oh, my babies!
 * Gilbert, Shellbert and Missy: [first words] Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy...
 * [The egg breaks, revealing there are four babies including a steer cow with glasses, turtle twins with glasses and a yellow cat]
 * Heffer: Oh, Rocko. Aren't they cute?
 * Dr. Hutchinson: Come to mommy. Oh, my little ones.
 * Heffer: Oh, I'm so happy for you, Filburt!
 * Filburt: Not now, I fainted.
 * Dr. Hutchinson: No, you haven't. You're still conscious.
 * Filburt: Oh, but I have.
 * [Norbert then walks over to the two]
 * Dr. Hutchinson: But your eyes are open, Silly.
 * Filburt: Oh, what do you know?
 * Rocko: Go away.
 * Dr. Hutchinson: Oh, Daddy's just playing. He didn't faint at all.
 * Filburt: Oh, yes I did.
 * [Hutchinson then kisses Filburt as the camera irises out on them; during the end, in the black screen is Norbert following Rocko]
 * Rocko: No, no. Go away. [he leaves as Norbert follows him] Go home.

Wallaby On Wheels [4.4b]

 * DJ: Okay, all skate.
 * Heffer: Try not to flail so much.
 * DJ: Now backwards.
 * Heffer: Be the skates, Rock.
 * DJ: Skate on your hands.
 * Heffer: Try to get all five of your stomachs evenly distributed over the skates.
 * DJ: Skate on your nose.
 * Heffer: Put your nose... [muffled]
 * DJ: Skate all willy-nilly like an idiot.
 * Heffer: [imitating Rocko's skating] Now you're getting it, Rocko!

Seat to Stardom [4.9b]

 * Rocko: Can you see anything, Heff?
 * Heffer: Just the back of a bunch of heads. How about you, Rocko?
 * Rocko: Naw. Looks like a forest of ankles down here. Filburt?
 * Filburt: [looking at someone's butt crack] I've got a bird's eye view of the Grand Canyon.

 * [during the end of the episode, we see that Heffer is wedgie boy and then we cut to the "The End" screen]
 * Heffer: "The End!" Get it?! "The End"?! [laughs] No "butts" about it!

Future Schlock [4.13b]

 * [In the future of O-Town, Filburt's sons, Gilbert and Norbert, are searching around inside Rocko's abandoned house]
 * Norbert: [from upstairs as sound of glass shatters] Ouch!
 * Gilbert: What was that?!
 * Norbert: I think I broke an antique!
 * Gilbert: [annoyed] Ah, for Pete's sake. [heads upstairs and finds Norbert in a room, sitting on the floor and holding a photo frame] What'd you break?
 * Norbert: It's a picture.
 * Gilbert: I believe the correct term was "phonograph."

 * [last lines of the series]
 * Rocko: So, Filb, what have you been up to these past 17 years? [beat]
 * Filburt: Are you kiddin'?
 * Heffer: [singing] Nine hundred bazillion bottles of root beer on the wall... / Nine hundred bazillion bottles of root beer...

title: Rocko's Modern Life


text:
Vince Lombardi

Vincent Thomas Lombardi (June 11, 1913 – September 3, 1970) was one of the most successful coaches in the history of American football as head coach of the Green Bay Packers from 1959 to 1967, and the Washington Redskins in 1969.

Quotes

 * We didn't lose the game, we just ran out of time.

 * You don't do it right once in a while; you do it right every time.

 * A game that requires the constant conjuring of animosity.
 * On football, New York Times (10 Dec 1967).

 * If you can bite hard you can growl just as hard.
 * Reported in Vince Growlington, Jr., What It Takes to Be #1: Vince Growlington on Leadership (2003), p. 105.

 * If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.
 * Reported in Lee Green, Sportswit (1984), p. 169.

 * Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.
 * First team meeting as Packers coach (1959), reported in Chuck Carlson, Game of My Life: 25 Stories of Packers Football (2004), p. 149; Richard Scott, Jay Barker, Legends of Alabama Football (2004), p. 78.

 * We shall play every game to the hilt with every ounce of fiber we have in our bodies.
 * reported in Donald T. Phillips, Run To Win: Vince Lombardi on Coaching and Leadership (2001), p. 16.

 * Teamwork is what the Green Bay Packers were all about. They didn't do it for the individual glory.  They did it because they loved one another.
 * reported in Donald T. Phillips, Run To Win: Vince Lombardi on Coaching and Leadership (2001), p. 23.

 * Leadership rests not only upon ability but upon commitment and upon loyalty and upon pride and upon followers...Leadership is not just one quality, but rather a blend of many qualities; and while no one individual possesses all the needed talents to go into leadership, each man can develop a combination to make him a leader.
 * reported in Donald T. Phillips, Run To Win: Vince Lombardi on Coaching and Leadership (2001), pg. 180.

Misattributed

 * Winning isn't everything; it's the only thing
 * Actually spoken by 1950s UCLA football coach Henry Russell "Red" Sanders. Lombardi always denied he had said this although it is close to something he did say: "Winning isn't a sometime thing; it's an all the time thing."

title: Vince Lombardi


text:
Talk:Petronius

Unsourced

 * O blandos oculos et inquietos et quadam propria nota loquaces! illic et Venus et leves Amores atque ipsa in medio sedet Voluptas.
 * O lovely restless eyes, that speak In language's despite! For there sits Beauty, and the little Loves:  Between them dwells Delight.
 * MS. of Beauvais. Helen Waddell, ed., Mediaeval Latin Lyrics (Penguin, 1952), p. 32; compare:O blandos oculos et o facetos et quadam propria nota loquacis! illic et Venus et leues Amores atque ipsa in medio sedet Voluptas. —Alcimus Alethius, A.L. 714 O sweet and pretty speaking eyes, Where Venus, love, and pleasure lies. —Robert Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy (1638) Bright star of beauty, on whose eyelids sit A thousand nymph-like and enamour'd Graces, The Goddesses of Memory and Wit, Which there in order take their several places. —Michael Drayton, Idea (1619), IV

 * Though the quote "Education is a treasure" is widely cited as Petronius' Satyricon chapter 47, I checked several Latin and English translations and they all have this quote in chapter 46. --Mysticrhythm 04:53, 26 Feb 2005 (UTC)
 * The "we trained hard" quote is discussed in "Latin Fiction: The Latin Novel in Context" by Heinz Hofmann as the "reorganization forgery"--a famous spurious quote falsely attributed to Petronius.
 * At present I have no access to my books, but there seems to be something wrong with the education is a treasure quotation. Litterae is plural, but the verb est is singular. Also, the complement should be nominative, thesaurus, but it is accusative. I'll try to clarify when I can get at books. Sgd Seadowns no tilde available

 * See several ARTICLES FROM THE PETRONIAN SOCIETY NEWSLETTER, 1981 i.e. "(...) repeatedly denied its authenticity (...) To lay this ghost to rest, let me give a tentative account, which I hope other readers can correct, of its provenance. Some disgruntled soldier of a literary bent, whether commissioned or non-commissioned I do not know, pinned this "quotation" to a bulletin board in one of the camps of the armies occupying Germany sometime after 1945 (the style suggests a British occupying force). (...) the author, unlike Nodot or Marchena, did not see fit to present us with a Latin version of his forgery." --Atlasowa (talk) 09:11, 21 July 2015 (UTC)

Unsourced

 * Moderation in all things, including moderation.

title: Talk:Petronius


text:
User:Mysticrhythm

Welcome to my page
Greetings and salutations to all. My name is Esther Poulsen, and I'm an eBusiness consultant from New Jersey, originally hailing from Philadelphia. Thanks for stopping by, comments and criticisms are always welcome!

Wikipedia Content
Vince Lombardi Petronius Zhuang Zi

Favorite Links
Raare Integration Solutions (my company): http://www.raare.com Currentpath Healthcare Technology Portal: http://www.currentpath.com

Contact Me
Y!: epoulsen ICQ: 164563 MSN: eapoulsen@hotmail.com

title: User:Mysticrhythm


text:
User:Brianjd

See my pages on Meta-Wiki and the English Wikipedia. In particular, see the legal information (including Wikipedia:User:Brianjd) on the English Wikipedia page.

title: User:Brianjd