text:
User talk:Achilles/Archive 1

Abbie Hoffman
thanks for restoring the Abbie Hoffman quote. Andries

Removal of genuine quotes from Prem Rawat by user:Jossifresco
I strongly object to removal of genuine quotes by user Jossifresco whom I believe to be the same person as ip user:64.81.88.140 Could you please help? Read this to understand the background of the conflict. Thanks Andries 17:11, 21 Nov 2004 (UTC)

 * Just a note that I responded to this and left comments on the Prem Rawat talk pages a few days ago. ~ Achilles 03:27, 2 Dec 2004 (UTC)

Delete for move
Where to I request a delete to allow a page move? Yes, Prime Minister is the correct spelling but contains only one quote already found on the much more complete but misspelled Yes Prime Minister. Rmhermen 16:41, 4 Mar 2005 (UTC)

 * I read the request here, and have taken care of this. ~ Kalki 22:50, 4 Mar 2005 (UTC)

Sysop
Hi, Achilles, would you like to consider to be a sysop? You are one of most active and experienced editors here, submitting many good quotes and caring for the maintenance. You know to pay attention to other editors (I'm inpressed by your comment to RPickman). If you would like me to nominate you as a candidate at Requests for adminship, please reply me here. Of course it will be welcome that you nominate yourself ;-) --Aphaia 05:32, 2 Apr 2005 (UTC)

 * Thanks for the inquiry as to my interest, but for now I will decline. The existing group of sysops seem to be doing a fine job, and I might occasionally prefer to be a bit more blunt or harsh with some people than might be proper for someone speaking in any "official" capacity as representative of the project. I plan to remain active here on at least an intermittent basis, and check things out, but I probably shouldn't be relied upon to be constantly involved. ~ Achilles 18:31, 2 Apr 2005 (UTC)

 * Thank you for your reply - or replies. Also your applause for our activities. It is sorry now you would like to decline. Seriously I think the number of administrators on this project is not enough keep it in a proper way. There are almost 500 users per a sysop; avarage is 200-250 users and there is already a heap of deletion candidates, though Kalki have been doing a good job. As for "representation" your idea is a bit surprise for me ;-) If I would have shared this idea, I wouldn't have accepted the recent nomination. And I would like to add I am known with my blunt, hasty and bossy attitude ;-) I can call my friends to evident my bluntness *g And since you are more active than I, so from this view you are more appropriate to represent this project than I in my humble opinion.
 * Anyway I would like you to know I admire always your fine work. You submit many good articles I have read with a great joy! :: Chers, --Aphaia 19:33, 2 Apr 2005 (UTC)

VfD
You added an article to VfD, but have neglected to vote for deletion, although you seemed in favour of it. Was there a reason? MosheZadka 08:08, 22 May 2005 (UTC)
 * Just an oversight. I have voted now. ~ Achilles

L. Ron Hubbard
Hi, Achilles. Thanks for reverting vandalism to L. Ron Hubbard. I have left a message on User talk:83.248.150.251 that the next time he vandalises a page, he will be blocked. Even if there is proof LRH did not say these quotes, current consensus rules that they be moved to "misattributed" with notes about how the misattribution came about. Feel free to point it out to the user, and if he vandalises the page again, please leave me a note so I will notice it and block him. Thanks ~ MosheZadka (Talk) 06:31, 4 August 2005 (UTC)

dear sir
fuck you

 * The above comment was posted by an anonymous coward using IP 82.23.255.111 very soon after I created a page for Sharon Tate, partially in response to witnessing heavy activity by others on the Charles Manson page, to which I added an image, did some formatting work, added a section, and some links. I am not sure whether the events were related or not.
 * Many bold and infantile cowards exist on the internet. I don't know if I was a deliberate or a random target of this particular form of idiocy, but I have always been inclined to take it as a compliment to be insulted by idiots.
 * I was reminded of J. D. Salinger's statement in The Catcher in the Rye (1951) :
 * That's the whole trouble. You can't ever find a place that's nice and peaceful, because there isn't any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you" right under your nose.
 * As Kurt Vonnegut has said... So it goes. . .      ~ Achilles

Ass or Ape?
Hi. Re the Lichtenberg quote: German Wikiquote has

"Ein Buch ist Spiegel, aus dem kein Apostel herausgucken kann, wenn ein Affe hineinguckt."

(lit. "A book is (a) mirror, out-of which no apostle look-out-from can, if an ape looks-in.")

for the original; no variant is noted there. The German for "an ass" is ein Esel. (I suspect what may have happened is that someone mistook the double f's in Affe for (Gothic script) s's and assumed the word was Asse = ass.) The fact that Google turns up more hits for the English version with "ass" is an interesting fact that might be noted, but it is not a valid argument re what the original quote was. RJCraig 20:58, 3 January 2006 (UTC)

 * Wow! You've been busy!!! My hat's off to you! RJCraig 18:56, 5 January 2006 (UTC)

0waldo says...
I just wanted to drop by and say hello to "Mr. cardboard sword". Thank you for voting to cmd: 'DELETE' me! You know, I just love a democratic vote... Take the ballots and mark them as planned, strip this place now of the pitiful man for he hath brains and not afraid to think, quickly now brothers - deprive him of ink!

So then, Mr. Cardboard sword, this is for you :) and these are :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) for your peers.
 * (4 January 2006)

 * This was a remark from a once rather persistent troll, who I had no interest in feeding, who often sought to engage in far more troublesome dialogue with others than actual contributions here and at Wikipedia. The sword referred to is of course an electronically produced image — and thus clearly not something of "cardboard" at all — but to some extent a sword of light and electricity and mental imagery — and I aim to shock many deceitful fools and dolts with such words of truth and such swords of discernment as I can wield. I have long retired from many a fray, as beneath my concern, but plan to enter a few that are arising very vigorously. ~ Achilles † 22:04, 22 February 2009 (UTC)

No pesonal attacks
Please refrain from making personal attacks as you have done on the abortion talk page. Perhaps you did not mean to do so. Nevertheless, I have edited out your attack. Just a friendly reminder. Mr. Grace

 * "Friendly reminder" My ASS — try smarmy conceited arrogantly presumptuous threat amidst arrogant attempts at censorship of honest and honestly restrained opinion. I made no "pesonal attacks" — I made vigorous criticism and honest observations of this person's apparent long time deceitfulness, under what seemed to be several guises. I too use different guises, and work on many different sites, but remain entirely honest in all of them, and respectful toward most people. I greatly respect the concept of Grace, and because I do, this person's use of that term as applied to themselves is one I have always found truly revolting. Though I actually can agree with and accept some of this person's opinions, this comment by this largely deceitful, fanatically obsessive partisan against existing abortion laws led me to long abandon editing under this persona here, as one I might not entirely be able to temper in dealing with such truly dis-graceful and contemptible hypocrisy and idiocy as was being manifest, and the deference which others seemed inclined to pay to it. I am not inclined to insult people, but I do state things as I see them.

 * I declared in the title section of a comment "The disgraceful edits of "Mr. Grace" (and perhaps others)" my honest critique of this person's edits. His/her prompt removal of my comments was promptly restored by another editor, after which he/she changed the title to "Editing concerns" — which I accepted as many of the points remained intact. I was then warned to "follow the rules" and make "no pesonal attacks" by this person whom I simply honestly accused of being deceitful, and with good reason. When people are so hypocritical and yet feel so smug that they can make an honest and vigorous accusation of someone practicing deceit and hypocrisy, where it is clearly evidenced, to be considered a "personal attack" I feel there is rarely any point in talking either to them or about them, personally. Their behavior and practices are beneath contempt, and the situation beyond something I care to bother about.

 * I have now resumed editing here under this name, and plan to contribute once more as Achilles from time to time, and engage in some contentions upon matters I feel significant. I won't promise even so much as a weekly or monthly presence, but I do plan to do things in coming weeks and months and will probably show up here more often for at least a few months.

 * Achilles absent is Achilles still, and I'm back. ~ Achilles † 22:04, 22 February 2009 (UTC) [with minor amendments ~ Achilles † 18:58, 24 February 2009 (UTC)]

title: User talk:Achilles/Archive 1


text:
Leah Tsemel

Lea Tsemel (born 1945) is an anti-Zionist Jewish human rights lawyer who has represented Palestinians accused of violence in Israel. Her husband is Michel Warschawski.

"The Israeli who defends suicide bombers," 2003

 * The occupation made it very clear to me that there was something wrong, and I started to ask myself all kinds of questions and came to the conclusion that Zionism is negative and bad, and that we are oppressing the Palestinians.

 * Everyone fights with their abilities - the Israelis have helicopters and rockets and the Palestinians have nothing but themselves and some very primitive home-made explosives.

 * I grew up in an Israeli culture where suicide attackers are really heroes. Look at Samson, who in order to fight the Philistines in Gaza made the theatre collapse on himself and all the civilians there. He is a very big hero among Jewish children. I grew up on the myth of better suicide than surrender. So what is so special about suicide bombers?

 * I don't understand why people would find my views abhorrent. If you ask any Israeli to put himself in a similar situation of occupation and oppression for 36 years - everyone would say they would do the same, including [Israeli Prime Minister Ariel] Sharon. I never heard any similar criticism from those Israelis who are shocked by the killing of women and children in suicide attacks, of an Israeli rocket attack that kills Palestinian civilians.

 * I don't support such actions or see this as the solution, but I can very well understand how suicide bombings became a very popular way of fighting - first, because it is quite successful; secondly, because people are ready to risk everything in order to achieve some progress in the national struggle.

license: Creative Commons - Attribution Share-Alike - https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

title: Leah Tsemel


text:
User talk:210.49.9.22

Deletions of quotations should not occur withot comment, and legitimate quotes should not be deleted without clear reason. ~ Achilles † 12:56, 29 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:210.49.9.22


text:
User talk:Christiaan

Thanks for your contribution of Lea Tsemel. Have you considered creating a wikipedia article about her? Thanks ~ MosheZadka (Talk) 13:18, 29 October 2005 (UTC)
 * No Prob. I would if I had the time. Christiaan 10:25, 30 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:Christiaan


text:
Kung Fu Hustle

Kung Fu Hustle is a 2005 film about two hapless conmen on the streets of 1940s Shanghai who pretend to be the members of the ruthless Axe Gang. Their extortion scheme fails when the victims fight back, and the plot thickens when the real Axe Gang shows up. Meanwhile, the run-down tenement that is being attacked, the Pig Sty, turns out to count amongst its residents superhuman kung-fu fighters.
 * ''Directed by Stephen Chow. Written by Tsang Kan Cheong,	Stephen Chow, Xin Huo and Chan Man Keung

Sing

 * [To ice cream vendor] What're you looking at? Never seen an ice cream thief before? [Runs away without paying, laughing maniacally]
 * [Shouting while puncturing football] No more soccer!

Landlady

 * How come you became righteous? Have you anything to say? [Sing draws a stick of candy on the ground with his blood] I can't read it, it's not in Chinese!
 * [To tailor] What's with the red underwear?
 * You may know kung fu... but you're still a fairy.

The Beast

 * In the world of kung fu, speed defines the winner.
 * Don't get me wrong! I only want to kill you, or be killed by you.
 * It's just a title.(Referring to the name The Beast)
 * This doesn't make any sense at all.

Other

 * Axe Gang Advisor: Let's kill them all and make this place a brothel!

Dialogue

 * Brother Sum: Ever killed anyone?
 * Sing: I've always thought about it.

 * Bone: You gave him your life savings?
 * Sing: Yes. I was saving to become a doctor or lawyer... but this was a chance at world peace.

 * Sing: [feelingly] I realized then that good guys never win. I want to be bad. I want to be a ruthless killer!
 * Bone: [looks up] Ice cream!
 * [He leaves]
 * Sing: Where?
 * [He follows]

 * Bone: Memories can be painful. To forget may be a blessing!
 * Sing: [amazed] I never knew you were so deep.

 * Axe Gang Advisor: So that makes you the best killers in circulation, right?
 * Harpist #1: In actuality, we are just a pair of street musicians.

 * Barber: Why don't you train us to be top fighters... and we'll avenge them!
 * Landlady: Becoming a top fighter takes time, unless you're a natural-born kung-fu genius, and they're 1 in a million.
 * Barber: [Doing martial arts routine] It's obvious I'm the one!
 * Landlady: [Punches him in the face, knocking him to the floor] Don't think so.

 * [After Sing defeats him with the Buddhist Palm technique]
 * The Beast: What is the name of your technique?
 * Sing: Do you want to learn? I will teach you.

 * Donut: [in English] What are you prepared to do?
 * Landlord: We can't understand what you're saying!

 * Landlord: [commenting on Sing's martial arts techniques] If he studies hard, he could be a doctor or a lawyer.
 * Landlady: A stuntman, more likely.

Taglines

 * A New Comedy Unlike Anything You Have Seen Before.
 * So Many Gangsters... So Little Time.
 * From Walking Disaster To Kung Fu Master.

Cast

 * Stephen Chow - Sing
 * Chi Chung Lam - Bone
 * Qiu Yuen - Landlady
 * Wah Yuen - Landlord
 * Xing Yu - Coolie
 * Dong Zhi Hua - Donut
 * Chiu Chi Ling - Tailor
 * Leung Siu-Lung - The Beast
 * Kwok Kuen Chan - Brother Sum
 * Kai Man Tin - Axe Gang Advisor

Lyrics
如果沒有妳在身邊的時候　HM.....

如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 只有逛逛被遺忘了的街頭 數數口袋裡賸餘的溫柔 假裝妳仍然躺在我的胸口 如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 日子怎麼變得好難過 三百六十五天用不完的時間 都沒有能夠讓我快樂的發現

＊如果生命只是一種等待 為了證明愛的存在 如果失去妳是暫時的悲哀 又為何多少年仍渴望你回來 如果相愛是一種無奈 就讓我倆能回到這無奈 我的感覺想妳能明白 無止境的等待

如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 心裡總會覺得好後悔 沒有好好說句動聽的話 再一次把妳破碎的心挽回 如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 心裡難過得說不出口 DOOH.....DAH.....

重唱　＊,＊

如果沒有妳在身邊的時候　HM.....    DOOH.....DAH..... 如果沒有妳在身邊的時候

title: Kung Fu Hustle


text:
A Streetcar Named Desire (1951 film)

A Streetcar Named Desire is a 1951 American film based on a play by Tennessee Williams.
 * Directed by Elia Kazan. Written by Tennessee Williams and Oscar Saul.

Blanche DuBois

 * The first time I laid my eyes on her told the story I thought to myself, "That man is my executioner!"

 * Some things are not forgivable. Deliberate cruelty is not forgivable. It is the one unforgivable thing in my opinion and the one thing of which I have never, never been guilty.

 * I don't want realism. I want magic! Yes, yes, magic. I try to give that to people. I do misrepresent things. I don't tell truths. I tell what ought to be truth.

 * Tarantula was the name of it! I stayed at a hotel called the Tarantula Arms! Yes, a big spider. That's where I brought my victims. Yes, I have had many meetings with strangers. After the death of Allan, meetings with strangers was all I seemed able to fill my empty heart with. I think it was panic — just panic — that drove me from one to another, searching for some protection. Here, there and then in the most unlikely places. Then, at last, in a seventeen-year-old boy. But someone wrote to the superintendent about it: "This woman is morally unfit for her position!" True? Yes... unfit somehow anyway.

 * Whoever you are: I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.
 * Note: the bolded portion is ranked #75 in the American Film Institute's list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema.

 * [to Stanley] It won't be the sort of thing you have in mind. This man is a gentleman - he respects me. What he wants is my companionship. Having great wealth sometimes makes people lonely. A cultivated woman - a woman of breeding and intelligence - can enrich a man's life immeasurably. I have those things to offer, and time doesn't take them away. Physical beauty is passing - a transitory possession. But beauty of the mind, richness of the spirit, tenderness of the heart - I have all those things - aren't taken away but grow! Increase with the years! Oh! Strange that I should be called a destitute woman when I have all these treasures locked in my heart. I think of myself as a very, very rich woman. But I have been foolish - casting my pearls before....swine. Yes, swine! And I'm thinking not only of you, but of your friend Mr. Mitchell. He came here tonight, he did, coming in his work clothes, to repeat slander, vicious stories he'd gotten from you. I gave him his walking papers. But then he returned, he returned with a box of roses to beg my forgiveness. He implored my forgiveness. Some things are not forgivable. Deliberate cruelty is not forgivable. It is the one unforgivable thing, in my opinion, and the one thing of which I have never, never been guilty. So I said to him, 'Thank you,' but it was foolish to think that we could ever adapt ourselves to each other. Our ways of life are too different. Our backgrounds are incompatible. So farewell, my friend and let there be no hard feelings.

Stanley Kowalski

 * Stella. Hey, Stella!
 * Note: ranked #45 in the American Film Institute's list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema.

 * You know what luck is? Luck is believing you're lucky, that's all... To hold a front position in this rat-race, you've got to believe you are lucky.

 * Don't you ever talk that way to me. "Pig," "Polack," "disgusting," "vulgar," "greasy" — those kind of words have been on your tongue and your sister's tongue just too much around here. What do you think you are, a pair of queens? Now just remember what Huey Long said — that every man's a king — and I'm the king around here, and don't you forget it.

 * Listen, baby, when we first met — you and me — you thought I was common. Well, how right you was. I was common as dirt. You showed me a snapshot of the place with them columns, and I pulled you down off them columns, and you loved it, having them colored lights goin.' And wasn't we happy together? Wasn't it all okay till she showed here? And wasn't we happy together? Wasn't it all okay till she showed here, hoity-toity, describin' me like a ape?

Dialogue

 * Blanche: You're married to a madman.
 * Stella: I wish you'd stop taking it for granted that I'm in something I want to get out of.
 * Blanche: What you are talking about is desire, just brutal desire. The name of that rattle-trap streetcar that bangs through the Quarter, up one old narrow street and down another.
 * Stella: Haven't you ever ridden on that streetcar?
 * Blanche: It brought me here, where I'm not wanted and where I'm ashamed to be.
 * Stella: Don't you think your superior attitude is a little out of place?
 * Blanche: May I speak plainly?... If you'll forgive me, he's common... He's like an animal. He has an animal's habits. There's even something subhuman about him. Thousands of years have passed him right by, and there he is. Stanley Kowalski, survivor of the Stone Age, bearing the raw meat home from the kill in the jungle. And you — you here waiting for him. Maybe he'll strike you or maybe grunt and kiss you — that is, if kisses have been discovered yet. His "poker night" you call it. This party of apes. Maybe we are a long way from being made in God's image, but Stella, my sister, there's been some progress since then. Such things as art, as poetry, as music. In some kinds of people, some tenderer feelings have had some little beginning that we have got to make grow and to cling to, and hold as our flag in this dark march toward whatever it is we're approaching. Don't, don't hang back with the brutes!

Cast

 * Vivien Leigh - Blanche DuBois
 * Marlon Brando - Stanley Kowalski
 * Kim Hunter - Stella Kowalski
 * Karl Malden - Harold "Mitch" Mitchell

title: A Streetcar Named Desire (1951 film)


text:
User talk:142.161.76.146

Deliberate vandalism can result in IP addresses being blocked from editing. Claiming a god-like certainty as to what is fiction and what is not among the historical records seems to be a growing tradition of presumption and arrogance among many people, entirely as contemptible as any dogma of any institutional traditions. ~ Kalki 23:15, 29 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:142.161.76.146


text:
User talk:69.233.97.73

~ MosheZadka (Talk) 05:46, 30 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:69.233.97.73


text:
Felix the Cat

Felix the Cat is a cartoon character from the silent-film era. His black body, white eyes, and giant grin, coupled with the surrealism of the situations in which his cartoons place him, combined to make Felix one of the most recognizable cartoon characters in the world

Sourced

 * Ha! Ha!
 * Typical response to many situations in the film shorts.

 * I'll buzz this guy for a job catching mice for him.
 * First lines of the second comic-strip appearance of Felix (1923).

 * "Alrightio!" or some variation of this spelling was uttered by Felix whenever he was in violent agreement with someone.
 * Throughout the television version of Felix' cartoons.

 * Felix the Cat, The wonderful, wonderful cat! Whenever he gets in a fix He reaches into his bag of tricks!
 * Theme song (1958) by Winston Sharples

 * I mean who is this duke of zill anyway? He's the one that's gotten me into this pickle. "ZILL PICKLE!" Get it?
 * Felix the Cat: The Movie (1988/1991)

Felix Saves the Day (1922)
Felix is up and down a tail in the ball.
 * Felix: I wonder what the score is?

( gasps  )
 * Felix: Get to the polo grounds as quick as you can!

Felix is look up around and roll the eyes.

Felix All Puzzled (1924)

 * Felix: How about my milk?

Felix shakes his head and he is angry point the finger.

 * Felix: All I found in Russia was trouble!

Bold King Cole (1936)
( thunder claps )

 * Felix: Let me go! Take your hands off me! Stop it!

( light blub off )

( door taps, thunder rumbling, door slams and piano plays )

 * Felix: Hooray! We win!

( axe clicks )

( music ends )

The End

The Goose that Laid The Golden Egg (1936) Rainbow Parade Cartoon

 * Felix: Don't thanks me. Thank you goes to lays the golden eggs. Look out!

( goose quacks )

( door closes )

 *  Felix: Go, Goldie! Go to sleep in the bed!

 * Captain Kidd: God, Captain Kidd and I want that goose!

 * Felix: Open the door, come in! Open the door!

( door wind slides )

 * Felix What do I do?

 * Captain Kidd: Come on, dozen eight.

 * Goldie: Eight?

 * Captain Kidd: You better hurry with those eggs!

 * Golie: No eggs.

 * Captain Kidd: All right, then! Help, myself!

 * Goldie: Sword?!? ( goose quacks )

( Felix gasps and water splashing )

( black ball snaps )

The End of a Rainbow Parade Cartoon

title: Felix the Cat


text: User:Felix~enwikiquote

title: User:Felix~enwikiquote


text:
User talk:Felix~enwikiquote

''Felix the Cat, The wonderful, wonderful cat! Whenever he gets in a fix He reaches into his bag of tricks!''
 * "Felix the Cat" (1958) by Winston Sharples

What the cinema can do better than literature or the spoken drama is to be fantastic. ~ Aldous Huxley

Your account will be renamed
Hello,

The developer team at Wikimedia is making some changes to how accounts work, as part of our on-going efforts to provide new and better tools for our users like cross-wiki notifications. These changes will mean you have the same account name everywhere. This will let us give you new features that will help you edit and discuss better, and allow more flexible user permissions for tools. One of the side-effects of this is that user accounts will now have to be unique across all 900 Wikimedia wikis. See the announcement for more information.

Unfortunately, your account clashes with another account also called Felix. To make sure that both of you can use all Wikimedia projects in future, we have reserved the name Felix~enwikiquote that only you will have. If you like it, you don't have to do anything. If you do not like it, you can pick out a different name.

Your account will still work as before, and you will be credited for all your edits made so far, but you will have to use the new account name when you log in.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Yours, Keegan Peterzell Community Liaison, Wikimedia Foundation 23:22, 17 March 2015 (UTC)

Renamed
 This account has been renamed as part of single-user login finalisation. If you own this account you can |log in using your previous username and password for more information. If you do not like this account's new name, you can choose your own using this form after logging in: . -- Keegan (WMF) (talk) 05:47, 19 April 2015 (UTC)

title: User talk:Felix~enwikiquote


text:
Wikiquote:Quote of the day/December

November << December 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 >> January

This page lists quote of the day proposals specifically for dates in the month of December, and quotes proposed should ideally have some relation to the day, or persons born on it, though sometimes exceptions can be made, usually for notable quotes that relate to recent events, such as the death of prominent individuals. Developing ideas of people or works to quote on specific days can be explored through the Wikipedia page: List of historical anniversaries. The numeric section heading of each date is also a direct link to the Wikipedia list of births, deaths, and other events which occured on that date.

 * See also: December 2008 · 2009 · 2010 · 2011 · 2012 · 2013 · 2014 · 2015 · 2016 · 2017

Ranking system:
 * 4 : Excellent - should definitely be used.
 * 3 : Very Good - strong desire to see it used.
 * 2 : Good - some desire to see it used.
 * 1 : Acceptable - but with no particular desire to see it used.
 * 0 : Not acceptable - not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.

Ranking system:
 * 4 : Excellent - should definitely be used. (Perhaps, at most, only one quote per day should be ranked thus by any user, as to avoid confusions.)
 * 3 : Very Good - strong desire to see it used.
 * 2 : Good - some desire to see it used.
 * 1 : Acceptable - but with no particular desire to see it used.
 * 0 : Not acceptable - not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.

zh:Wikiquote:每日名言/12月

title: Wikiquote:Quote of the day/December


text:
Wikiquote:Quote of the day/January

December << January 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 >> February

This page lists quote of the day proposals specifically for dates in the month of January, and quotes proposed should ideally have some relation to the day, or persons born on it, though sometimes exceptions can be made, usually for notable quotes that relate to recent events, such as the death of prominent individuals. Developing ideas of people or works to quote on specific days can be explored through the Wikipedia page: List of historical anniversaries. The numeric section heading of each date is also a direct link to the Wikipedia list of births, deaths, and other events which occured on that date.

 * See also: January 2008 · 2009 · 2010 · 2011 · 2012 · 2013 · 2014 · 2015 · 2016 · 2017 · 2018 · 2019

Ranking system:
 * 4 : Excellent - should definitely be used. (Perhaps, at most, only one quote per day should be ranked thus by any user, as to avoid confusions.)
 * 3 : Very Good - strong desire to see it used.
 * 2 : Good - some desire to see it used.
 * 1 : Acceptable - but with no particular desire to see it used.
 * 0 : Not acceptable - not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.

zh:Wikiquote:每日名言/1月

title: Wikiquote:Quote of the day/January


text:
User talk:Krazy Kat

--Shreshth91 ($ |-| rE$ |-| t |-|  ). 10:15, 30 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:Krazy Kat


text:
User:Krazy Kat

Curiouser and curiouser! ~ Alice ~  What concerns me fundamentaly is a meteoric burlesk melodrama, born of the immemorial adage love will find a way. ~ e. e. cummings ~

title: User:Krazy Kat


text:
Wikiquote:Quote of the day/February

January << February 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 >> March

This page lists quote of the day proposals specifically for dates in the month of February, and quotes proposed should ideally have some relation to the day, or persons born on it, though sometimes exceptions can be made, usually for notable quotes that relate to recent events, such as the death of prominent individuals. Developing ideas of people or works to quote on specific days can be explored through the Wikipedia page: List of historical anniversaries. The numeric section heading of each date is also a direct link to the Wikipedia list of births, deaths, and other events which occured on that date.

 * See also: February 2008 · 2009 · 2010 · 2011 · 2012 · 2013 · 2014 · 2015 · 2016 · 2017 · 2018

Ranking system:
 * 4 : Excellent - should definitely be used.
 * 3 : Very Good - strong desire to see it used.
 * 2 : Good - some desire to see it used.
 * 1 : Acceptable - but with no particular desire to see it used.
 * 0 : Not acceptable - not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.

Ranking system:
 * 4 : Excellent - should definitely be used. (Perhaps, at most, only one quote per day should be ranked thus by any user, as to avoid confusions.)
 * 3 : Very Good - strong desire to see it used.
 * 2 : Good - some desire to see it used.
 * 1 : Acceptable - but with no particular desire to see it used.
 * 0 : Not acceptable - not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.

zh:Wikiquote:每日名言/2月

title: Wikiquote:Quote of the day/February


text:
User talk:Jdandrea

~ MosheZadka (Talk) 14:41, 30 October 2005 (UTC)

title: User talk:Jdandrea


text:
User:Twice25

 * Twice25 in it.Wikipedia
 * Twice25 in it.Wikiquote
 * Twice25 in Commons

title: User:Twice25


text:
User:Zondor~enwikiquote

Wikipedia:User:Zondor

title: User:Zondor~enwikiquote


text:
Drawn Together

Drawn Together (2004 – 2007) is an adult animated Comedy Central television show that spoofs reality TV shows, especially The Real World and The Surreal Life.

Hot Tub (1.01)

 * [First lines]
 * Jew Producer: (offscreen) This is the Drawn Together house, where eight different cartoon characters from all over the animated universe will live together in front of a million cameras. Introducing: Princess Clara, a musical and bigoted fairy tale princess. Wooldoor Sockbat, a fucking annoying, wacky whatchamacallit. Foxxy Love, a mystery-solving musician with a sweet ass. Toot, a black-and-white heartthrob from '20s. Plus, she's fat. Ling-Ling, a sociopathic Asian trading-card battle monster. Xandir, a totally gay video game adventurer. Spanky Ham, a crass internet download who farts on retards. Captain Hero, another person in the house. This is Drawn Together, the first ever animated reality television show, ever.

 * Toot: I'm Toot. I'm a sex-symbol.
 * Xandir: I'm Xandir. I'm on a never-ending quest to save my girlfriend!
 * Toot: Girlfriend? You have a girlfriend?! When were you gonna tell me about this girlfriend?!
 * Xandir: But we just met, like, two seconds ago?
 * Toot: Oh yeah? Well, can your stupid girlfriend do this?
 * [Toot dances the Charleston, shaking the house due to her weight]
 * Captain Hero: Save yourselves! [Flies out of the house]

 * [Lyrics to Some Black Chick's Tongue]
 * Clara: What is this thing in my mouth?
 * It's slippery and its slimy
 * Traveling down my slender virgin pink esophagus
 * Some black chick's tongue,
 * It's such a new sensation.
 * Foxxy: I got a mayonnaise momma on my licking hole, oh yeah, Foxxy's gettin' some.
 * Clara: It's really quite thrilling.
 * Foxxy: That's right now, you know.
 * Clara: I think I taste a filling.
 * Foxxy: And it's solid gold.
 * Clara: Never dreamed I'd be so willing to let myself go.
 * Foxxy: Tell me about it, I'm totally frenchin' a racist ho!
 * Clara: This black chick's tongue. What a wonderful feeling.
 * Foxxy: Damn, where'd this bitch get her earrings?
 * Clara: I've never had so much fun.
 * Both: As with this black chick's tongue.
 * Captain Hero: How cool is this? We've only been here a day and I already find myself in a three way

Clara's Dirty Little Secret (1.02)

 * Toot: What happens in fairy tales after the princess has her first kiss? Hmm?
 * Clara: She runs away with a sexy one-eyed pirate who loves as fiercely as he lives.
 * Toot: Not that fairy tale, food-for-brains! The other one!
 * Clara: Let's see. They live happily ever after in a castle with a couple of...kids! Oh my God, I am pregnant!
 * Ling-Ling: [in Japanese gibberish] Oh my God, the sink's full of dirty dishes again.

 * Foxxy: So you see, Clara. You can't get pregnant from a kiss.
 * Clara: But...[She stands up and runs off into upstairs] But...Oh no! [crying]
 * Foxxy: Well, what's wrong now? You should be happy you ain't pregnant.
 * Clara: No man will ever want to put his pee-pee in my giggy!

 * [Clara is doing an interpretive dance, humming]
 * Foxxy: Really, when you was but a child. Your evil stepfather put a curse on your vagina?
 * Clara: What? Weren't you paying attention? My evil stepmother. Mother placed a curse on me.
 * Toot: Uh, DUUUUUH!
 * Clara: I never understood why she did it...until now. No man will ever want to enjoy the special hug with me. She did it so I'd never find my true love. [crying] Oh, but please, please don't tell anybody about my secret, and I'm afraid I must ask you guys to keep my secret with a pinky swear.
 * Foxxy: I pinky swear.
 * [they look at Toot]
 * Toot: Ugh! Fine, I swear too.
 * Octopussoir: [gravelly voice] I pinky swear.
 * Captain Hero: [knocks on door] Hey, Clara, Toot told us you have a monster for a vagina and we want to have a house meeting about it.
 * Clara: How is that even possible? [stares at Toot]
 * Toot: Oopsey-Tootsey. I couldn't help myself.

 * [Lyrics to La-la-la-la Labia]
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: In your wizard's sleeve.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: Some sweet PT.
 * Foxxy: Hoochie coochie, gitchy gitchy, yeah, yeah, yeah, Gotta snatcha, gonna catcha, yatcha, yeah yeah yeah, Binja minja, bearded clam. Furry burger, smiley sam. La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Octopussoir: Oh, yes siree!
 * Foxxy: Fluffy muffy stuffy in the yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta fever for the beaver weaver, yeah yeah yeah, Honey pot peachie pie.
 * Octopussoir: Take it to the Y-clef.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: In your wizard's sleeve.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: Some sweet PT.
 * Foxxy: Bushy bushy, fishy squishy, yeah, yeah, yeah. Smelly jelly underbelly yeah yeah yeah. La la la la labia, baby you got something for me
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: In your wizard's sleeve.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you got something for me.
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: Some sweet PT.
 * Foxxy: Cookie nookie, slitty kitty, yeah, yeah, yeah, I diggy giggy, murky wiggy, yeah, yeah, yeah. La la la la labia baby you got something for me
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: In your wizard's sleeve.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia, baby you got something for me
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: Some sweet PT.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia, baby you got something for me
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: in your wizard's sleeve.
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia, baby you got something for me
 * Spanky and Captain Hero: Some sweet PT.

 * Foxxy: There's got to be a way a break this curse.
 * Clara: The only person who knows how is my evil stepmother. And I can't ask her. We're in a fight. Fine. I'll call her on my mirror. Call evil step-mom.
 * Evil Stepmother: Ah, well, well, well, look who's finally calling to apologize.
 * Clara: I'm not apologizing! You should apologize!
 * Evil Stepmother: For what, trying to make you happy?
 * Clara: You thought marrying my father would make me happy?!
 * Evil Stepmother: You never gave me a chance!
 * Clara: Why should I? You're not my mother!
 * Evil Stepmother: I never said I was!
 * Clara: THEN STOP PRETENDING TO BE!
 * Evil Stepmother: Clara, your mother's dead! [gasps in shock] The good lord and your father's drunken carriage driving took her away from us, and there is nothing anyone can do about it.
 * Clara: I miss her. I miss her so much, it hurts. I'm sorry.
 * Evil Stepmother: Me too, dear. Me too. OK, now that we got that cleared up, I should probably tell you how to break the pesky little curse.
 * Clara: Oh, yes! Oh, yes! Do tell me how to break the curse...Mom.
 * Evil Stepmother: Oh, Clara, thank you.

Gay Bash (1.03)

 * Clara: [confessional] There's only one person who knows where the genie's lamp is, and he has sworn to never reveal its sacred location, but luckily, I know his only weakness. [Smells muffins] Ahhh.. [Smacks Wooldoor with a muffin pan] Tell us where the lamp is, you lousy lying piece of shit!
 * Wooldoor: Lamp? [Gets smacked with time some more] I don't know what you're talking about?!
 * Clara: Listen, bitch! Tell us where the lamp is and maybe I'll talk to the D.A. about extenuating circumstances!
 * Wooldoor: Guys, guys! Seriously, I don't even know what the lamp is!?
 * Xandir: Fuck this shit! I'm gonna off this glue-sniffing cocksucker right fucking now!
 * Clara: I've seen him do it, man!
 * Wooldoor: I'll talk! I'll talk!

 * [Xandir has locked himself in the bathroom having found out that he is gay, whilst Foxxy, Clara and Spanky try to coax him out].
 * Foxxy: [knocking on door] Xandir, please come on out. It's totally cool that you're gay, stop beatin' yourself up.
 * Clara: Seriously, Xandir, it's not your place to punish yourself, it's God's!
 * Xandir: [in the bathroom] Leave me alone! I'm taking another gay test!
 * Foxxy: What? The only test in there is a pregnancy test!
 * Xandir: Oh, great, now I've got two problems.

Requiem for a Reality Show (1.04)

 * [Lyrics to Bully Song]
 * Clara: Bullies are people who hate themselves.
 * Abused at age six or molested at twelve, so they pick on others. Isn't it odd?
 * Because their real quarrel is with God. Who's afraid of a bully?
 * Wooldoor: Me.
 * Clara: [giggles] Not me. For there are much
 * better things to be frightened of
 * like people of color and gay homo love.
 * So stand up to the bully stand tall and true, just like Jesus stood up to those misguided Jews.
 * Wooldoor: You're right!
 * Clara: Now, who's afraid of a bully?
 * Wooldoor: Not me. No, not me.
 * Clara: When you stand up to the bully.
 * Wooldoor: He'll flee.
 * Clara: Oh yes, he'll flee like the pathetic, insecure, cowardly loser he be.

 * Clara: [cries] My dear little friends! They're dead! DEAD! BECAUSE OF YOU!
 * Wooldoor: Oh, God, I am so sorry!
 * Clara: You said you were my friend!
 * Wooldoor: I am your friend!
 * Clara: YOU'RE A MURDERER!
 * Wooldoor: [hugging Clara] I know! I know! Are you as turned on as I am?
 * Clara: What? What the hell did you say?!
 * Wooldoor: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. When I get upset, I just say the craziest things! Can I borrow five bucks?
 * Clara: Just go, Wooldoor! Just go! To my bedroom, my purse is in the top drawer. There should be like, five, maybe ten dollars in there!
 * [Wooldoor leaves, cries]

 * Foxxy: The considerable alternative is anorexia. All the benefits of bulimia with none of the mess.
 * Toot: Does it really work?
 * Xandir: Of course it works! All you have to do is make sure to look in the mirror every day and see yourself as ugly and obese, no matter how much weight you lose.
 * Ling-Ling: Then everyone's happy.

 * Wooldoor: And Spanky tried to take him, but I sang your song and stood up to him!
 * Clara: [gasped] Oh! [kisses a chipmunk]
 * Wooldoor: I'm so sorry, Clara, for everything I did. Oh, please, please, forgive me?
 * Clara: Oh, Wooldoor, I...I forgive you.
 * Wooldoor: You do? Ohh! [He and Clara hugged] Hug.
 * Clara: [Confessional] Wooldoor took responsibility for what he did. And besides, to forgive is a mitzvah. [Confessional off] Oh, chipmunk. I didn't know I was leading you all into a trap. Can you ever forgive me?
 * Chipmunk: I forgive you, my princess. And don't worry, I won't tell the others.
 * Clara: So, uh...you won't tell anyone that I'm indirectly responsible for the genocide of your people?
 * Chipmunk: Uh...no. Of course not.
 * Clara: [sighs] I wish I could believe you. [casually kills the chipmunk]

The Other Cousin (1.05)

 * Ling-Ling: [In confessional] Ling-Ling so want visit from father. He great warrior/dry cleaner. He coined classic phrase, "No ticky, no washy."

 * Xandir: It just didn't make sense. When we licked Ling-Ling last time we got all fucked up, but this time nothing happened. Well, we got a little aroused...but not fucked up!

 * Clara: [Confessional] I found it a bit odd that Captain Hero wanted to take Bleh out on a date, and it was my responsibility to make sure his intentions were pure. [Confessional off] So, Captain Hero, is it?
 * Captain Hero: Oh! [chuckles] Yeah.
 * Clara: Coming to take my little Bleh out for a night on the town, eh? You know, I don't know what'd I do if anything happened to my little Bleh.
 * Captain Hero: Yes, ma'am. I mean, no, ma'am.
 * Clara: Son, do you know what it's like to kill a man with your bare hands? [cocks a shotgun] I do.
 * Captain Hero: I...Oh! Here's Bleh now! Wow! You look...stunning!
 * Bleh: I am Sam's Dakota Fanning is worth the price of admission.
 * Captain Hero: [getting shot with a dart by Clara] Ow! What the hell?
 * Clara: A little added protection. You'll get the antidote when I get my Bleh back.

 * [Lyrics to You're My Hero]
 * Captain Hero: Did you ever know that you're my hero?
 * You're everything I wish I could be.
 * I could fly higher and a hero.
 * Won't you come along and fly with me? Oh fly!
 * So high against the sky!
 * So high I almost touched the sky.
 * So high I'll fly with you.
 * You're my hero.

 * Clara: Captain Hero!
 * Captain Hero: Clara, it's not what you think!
 * [Bleh gibbering]
 * Clara: Get up! Get up right now!
 * Bleh: I am Sam reduces Penn to a mugging embarrassment. Raves Milk Clark of USA today.
 * Clara: I don't care. Let's go!
 * Bleh: Yeeeh...
 * Clara: Go back to your cage right now!
 * Spanky: Well, look who's doing the limp of shame!

 * Spanky: Well, nice work, Captain Hero. Here's the $50 I bet you have sex with Bleh.
 * Clara: [shocked] Oh!
 * Captain Hero: Yeeeeeh!
 * Spanky: Oh, um, I mean, uh...here is the $50 Captain Hero won off me, because I bet him he would not have sex with your special cousin Bleh. But he did, in fact, have sex with her. Oh, yes, he did. For $50. Oh, man. Saved it.
 * [Captain Hero facepalm]
 * Clara: Captain Hero, I forbid you to see my cousin ever again!

Dirty Pranking Number 2 (1.06)

 * King: I'm doing this for your own good. You need to stay away from a.) this house...
 * Clara: Well then, I guess this is goodbye. [the doorbell rings] Well then, I guess that's the doorbell. [the pizza man shows up at the door] Well then, I guess that's the pizza man.
 * King: What the hell do you want?!
 * Pizza Man: Someone ordered the pizza.
 * Spanky: That would be me. No one puts baby in the corner.

 * Foxxy: OK, here's how it's gonna go down. I'm going to finish my hair. Spanky, you order the pizza. And Clara, you go into the confessional and tell the camera how you never felt so alive.
 * Clara: [In confessional] My first naughty prank! I have never felt so alive!

 * Clara: Lately I feel like there's something missing.
 * King: Did you check the colored girl's room?
 * Clara: No, I mean there's something missing in my life
 * King: You are a princess, uh-duuuuh!
 * Clara: I know that, father, but I long for so much more.
 * King: Of course you do, that's because you're a princess, and that's what princesses do, they long for more. Or die in a car crash in France.

The One Wherein There Is A Big Twist (1.07)

 * Toot: Ugh! You were just gonna leave that there? Bitch, pick it up!
 * Captain Hero: Fuck you, fatty foopah!
 * Toot: Pick it up or I'm sending you back to hell! [pulls a gun at Captain Hero]
 * Clara: All right, Toot, drop your weapon! [pulls a gun at Toot]
 * Xandir: No, you drop it! [pulls a gun on Clara]
 * Spanky: Nobody holds a gun to my girl but me! [also pulls a gun on Clara]
 * Wooldoor: All right, let's fucking do this! [has a lot of mulitiple arms with guns, knife, etc. pointed at everyone but himself] I'm not afraid to DIE!! [sprouts yet another arm with a gun pointed at himself]

 * Bucky Bucks: Xandir, I can't help but think this is all your fault.
 * Xandir: What?! But I'm a certified air traffic controller with ten years of experience!
 * Spanky: I heard Gay Traffic Controller, with Gay Years of experience! [high-fives Captain Hero]
 * Bucky Bucks: Spanky brings up a good point.

The One Wherein There Is A Big Twist, Part II (2.01)

 * [Lyrics to Shit Sandwich]
 * Clara: You now found the treasure firmly in your hand, but then you woke up.
 * Captain Hero: And it had turned to sand and now you have to face the facts.
 * Spanky: It's a huge shit sandwich.
 * Xandir: And you have to take a bite.
 * Ling-Ling: It's a huge shit sandwich.
 * Foxxy: And you got to take a big old steamin' bite.
 * Wooldoor: Of the shit sandwich.
 * Xandir: You dreamed of A-list parties.
 * Foxxy: A talk show on late night.
 * Clara: But those dreams burned up like a concert with Great White.
 * Xandir: And you're like a club owner without insurance.
 * Captain Hero: It's a huge shit sandwich.
 * Ling-Ling: And you have to take a bite.
 * Entire Cast: It's a huge shit sandwich.
 * Clara: And you have to take a
 * Foxxy: Big old steamin' bite
 * Entire Cast: Of the shit sandwich.

 *  [ Scorpion appears]
 * Xandir: You're from Mortal Kombat? I'm from a video game too! Tell me, what's your special move?
 * Scorpion: [performs his Spear move on Xandir] GET OVER HERE! [performs a Head Rip Fatality]
 * Announcer: Fatality!
 * Xandir: [comes back] Impressive! My special move is the reach-around!
 * Scorpion: Oy vey.

 * Clara: Can we talk about how great our new roommate is? She's, like, so great!
 * Xandir: To Sweetcake, for making us prove that we're all replacable.
 * Captain Hero: And to the teeniest ass you can tap without setting off an AMBER Alert.

Foxxy vs. The Board Of Education (2.02)

 * Spanky: Hey Xandir, do you know what job you'd be perfect for?
 * Xandir: Basket weaver?
 * Spanky: No, Director of Homo-land security. [laughs as Captain Hero walks in] Hey Cap, guess what I told Xandir?
 * Captain Hero: That he should be Director of Homo-land security?
 * Spanky: How'd you know?
 * Captain Hero: You told me like five times now, plus I've always said he's the right man for the job. [In confessional] If you fat cats up in Washington had the guts to appoint someone who thinks outside the box!
 * Announcer: Paid for by the committee to elect homos.

 * Clara: [screams] What is this unholy abomination?!
 * Wooldoor: Hi, Clara. You're just in time to witness a fake gay marriage for the health insurance.
 * Clara: What? If gays get married, the institution of marriage will be destroyed! Societies will crumble! Rivers will run with blood! Nazis will once again ride on dinosaurs!
 * Spanky: I'll take care of this. [to Clara] Hey Clara, there's a Jew outside trying to poison a well!
 * Clara: [screams] Oh my God! [runs to well] Get away from that well, Hebrew!
 * Jewish Man: What? I'm putting in water purification tablets!
 * Clara: Spanky tricked me. As God as my witness, I'll put an end to this gay marriage, I swear!
 * [Thunder crashes; raining]
 * Jewish Man: Nice tits.
 * [Clara gasps]

 * Clara: This is Princess Clara calling for the King of Insurance. Yes, I'd like to report a fake gay marriage.
 * Jewish Man: And I'd like to report a great set of tits.

Little Orphan Hero (2.03)

 * Clara: [In confessional] The producers told us that we must start a business of our choosing. I wanted to have a bake sale, but the stereotypes had other ideas.
 * Xandir: Let's open a hair salon!
 * Foxxy: Ooh, we could shine shoes!
 * Ling Ling: I say full-release massage parlor that serves wok-fried puppies!
 * Toot: LET'S EAT POTATO SALAD!!!
 * Clara: [In confessional] Finally we all agreed...
 * Housemates: A suicide hotline!

 * Foxxy: Goddamned white producers with their goddamned white flashes. They can edit us to make us say whatever they want. My taint is made out of bacon. STOP IT! Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, my taint. 100% pure bacon.

 * Captain Hero's Mother: Captain Leslie Hero! You thought this would prove you're not a lame superhero?!
 * Captain Hero: Mom, don't call me Leslie in front of Two-Hands!
 * Captain Hero's Mother: The doctor was right! You are SO lame!
 * Captain Hero: I'm not lame!
 * Captain Hero's Mother: Yes! Yes you are! [rips his posters off the wall]
 * Captain Hero: Please, Mom! Please don't do that! Don't be mean to me!
 * Captain Hero's Mother: I'm not being mean to you. You're just too lame to say it!
 * Captain Hero: You don't know what I can do, what I'm gonna do and you don't know! You don't know who I'm gonna be! You don't know how good I am! I have good things and you don't know it! Like I'm gonna be somebody, and don't tell me I'm not! [runs off crying]

 * Xandir: Oh, come on, Captain Hero. You're not the lamest superhero ever. Come out of the dumpster.
 * Captain Hero: No. This is where my mommy wanted me to be anyways.

 * Foxxy: Those goddamned cunt shit dumbass piss fuck meatball dick cock motherfuckers!

 * Captain Hero: I'm cured! Oh, I'm cured! My therapist made me realize that it's not my fault my parents are dead. I couldn't have stopped Zebulon from crashing into the sun.
 * Foxxy: You mean the planet Zebulon? Zebulon didn't crash into no sun, Captain Tardo.
 * Captain Hero: What'choo talkin' 'bout, Foxxy?
 * Foxxy: Zebulon is a triving planet with a booming economy.
 * Captain Hero: Huh, yeah right. [snort] As if.
 * Toot: We order Zebulonese takeout food all the time. You love the deep fried Zebulonads.
 * Captain Hero: I never put the two together.
 * Spanky: Don't you remember? We went to Zebulon for spring break.
 * Captain Hero: Dude, I was so wasted the whole time!
 * Xandir: Plus, we're stealing out cable from Zebulon.
 * (Cut to a giant cable protruding from the Drawn Together house and into the sky)
 * Captain Hero: Okay, okay! I get it!
 * Spanky: How else could we watch Everybody Loves Zorgleblat? Man, I hate that Patricia Hetenglab, what a clexblunt.
 * Captain Hero: Well then, if Zebulon didn't blow up, that would mean...my parents are still alive...oh my God. Oh my God! OH MY GOD!

 * Foxxy: And I don't want to be responsible for no stupid-ass suicide hotline.
 * Toot: Oh, come on, Foxxy, this time it'll be different. We'll stick with it!
 * (Everyone starts talking, trying to convince her, when someone suddenly says something horrible)
 * Unknown Voice:: I lit a homeless girl on fire!
 * (Everyone stops talking in shock)
 * Foxxy: What the? That's horrible! Who said that?
 * (Everyone mutters and talks among themselves, trying to figure out who said that and the voice talks again)
 * Unknown Voice: Fire's happy now.
 * (Everyone freezes in shock and looks around the room at each other in confusion)

 * (The gang tries to pull the plug on Jeffery's life support as his last dying wish)
 * Jeffery: Freeze, douchebags!
 * (Jeffery reveals himself to be an undercover cop)
 * Foxxy: Jeff! What you doing?
 * Jeffery: My name isn't Jeff. My real name is Jeffery and I'm part of an undercover sting unit called the Special Tactical Operations Unit to Catch People Who Set Up Suicide Hotlines Because of a Reality Show Challenge and Then Didn't Follow Through on Them So They Caused the People Who Needed Them to Take Their Own Lives and Then They Changed their Minds When They Realized Not All People Should Be Forced to Live So They Try to Assist Someone in Euthanasia, or as we call it for short, the STOUTCPWSUSHBOARSCATDFTOTSTCTPWNTTTTMWTRNAPSBFTLSTTTASIE Team.
 * Foxxy: Goddamn hotline!
 * Clara: I can't go back to jail! I won't go back! [She jumps and through the window, screaming as she falling to her death]

 * Spanky: This so stupid, it's like a retarded third grader wrote this.

Captain Hero's Marriage Pact (2.04)

 * [All talking at a rapid pace]
 * Foxxy Phat: He ain't lookin' at you, Love.
 * Foxxy Dark: He wasn't lookin' at yo fat ass.
 * Foxxy Yella: What did you call me?
 * Lil' Foxxy: Step off!
 * Foxxy Love: Bring it!
 * Foxxy Phat: Girrrrrl!
 * Foxxy Dark: Drop it like it's hot!
 * Foxxy Yella: Can I get a witness?!
 * Lil' Foxxy: Holla!
 * Foxxy Phat: Hey hey hey!

 * Unusually Flexible Girl: Why!? Why doesn't Captain Hero want to marry me!? [cries] Why doesn't anyone love me? I'M SO ALONE!!
 * Wooldoor: You're not alone. You've got me.
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: I don't want to end up like Nana. She spent her final years alone in a dank, smelly nursing home with nobody around to say "I love you"! [cries] By the time I got back from Spring Break 2003 Daytona Beach MTV Monster Party Jam Week...SHE WAS DEAD!!! [crying]
 * Wooldoor: That's horrible!
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: I don't want to die alone!
 * Wooldoor: I don't want to die alone either!
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: We have no choice!
 * Wooldoor: We have to do something!
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: Like what?
 * Wooldoor: Like get married!
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: (hugged Wooldoor) I do! You hear that, everyone? I'm marrying...what was your name again?
 * [Wooldoor whispering]
 * Unusually Flexible Girl: I'm marrying Wooldoor!

 * [Foxxy finds that she has accidentally run over the rest of the Foxxy 5 after a night of drinking]
 * Foxxy Dark: Foxxy...
 * Foxxy Yella: Why you do this to us, Foxxy?
 * Li'l Foxxy: Why yo run us over?
 * Foxxy Phat: Hey hey hey.
 * Foxxy: [picking up the phone] I need to call an ambulance! Oh girls, I am so sorry. I never should have been drinking and driving. That is the last time I mix liquor and beer and cough syrup and Kool-Aid and Grape Kool-Aid and Lemon Pledge! [In confessional] And this time I mean it!

 * [Lyrics to Crashy Smashy Die Die Die]
 * Foxxy: Splattered 'cross the hood, bloody guts and pain! (Crashy Smashy my oh my.) Compound fracture, puncture lung, bashed in brains! (Crashy Smashy Die Die Die!) Crunchy, cracky, smacky, wacky! All that's left...Is best friend puddin' topped with asphault death! Hey crashy smashy! (Another statistic!) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy my oh my) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy die die die) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy my oh my) Crash and Diiiiiiiie! (Crashy smashy die die die)

Clum Babies (2.05)

 * Captain Hero: [In confessional] The club was jumpin', and Ling-Ling was surrounded by babes. But somehow we got stuck hanging out with Ling-Ling's lame friend, Steve from Long Island.

 * [Lyrics to God is Watching Everything You Do]
 * Veggie Fables: God is watching everything you do.
 * Bob the Cucumber: When you get undressed or take a shower.
 * Larry the Tomato: When you touch yourself for hour after hour.
 * Veggie Fables: God is watching everything you do. And he thinks you're a nasty naughty nympho slut. You sinful filthy whore, you're going to hell. Your flesh will burn. Your bones will churn. Your soul will be torn asunder.
 * (Clara screams)
 * Veggie Fables: You wretched heathen heretic. Burn in Hell!
 * Larry the Tomato: For eternity!
 * Bob the Cucumber: So you'd better remember.
 * Veggie Fables: God is watching everything you do.

 * Larry the Tomato: I'm sorry for thinking impure thoughts. [whips himself]
 * Bob the Cucumber: I'm sorry for being so phallic. [whips himself]
 * Clara: I'm sorry for buying child slaves from third world countries. [whips herself]
 * Chinese Boy: Free! [drops his feather duster]
 * Clara: [to the Chinese boy] I said "I'm sorry", not "stop dusting!"
 * Wooldoor: I'm sorry I masturbated! [whips himself] And I'm sorry I helped people! [whips himself again] And I'm sorry I spied on Clara going potty every morning!
 * Clara: What? That's disgusting!
 * Wooldoor: You're one to talk, Princess Smell-Your-Wipes. [Clara whips him]

 * Bob the Cucumber: Clara, stop! You mustn't use one of those. God forbids it!
 * Foxxy: Goddamn it, what's the point of having a secret deep programming room if everybody know where it is?
 * Bob the Cucumber: Clara, please put the clum baby down.
 * Spanky: But she's dying! She needs it!
 * Clara: I don't know what to do. I have the consumption.
 * Larry the Tomato: Then god wants you to have the consumption.
 * Foxxy: That's just retarded. What if God created clum babies because he wants Clara to live?
 * Larry the Tomato: But the bible says...
 * Spanky: Yeah, yeah, the bible says a lot of things...and not very clearly.
 * Foxxy: We ain't sayin' your interpretation is wrong, but perhaps the bible isn't a set of strict rules, but rather a guide to help each of us to find our personal relationship with the Lord.
 * Clara: I never thought of it that way.
 * Larry the Tomato: I guess that is possible.
 * Bob the Cucumber: [in an furious tone] ENOUGH FUCKING TALK! IN THE NAME OF GOD, PUT THE FUCKING CLUM BABY DOWN!
 * Clara: But, but...
 * Bob the Cucumber: Eh! But... but...but!
 * [Bob the Cucumber shoots Clara]
 * Foxxy: Jesus!
 * [Bob the Cucumber shoots Foxxy]
 * Larry the Tomato: This wasn't part of the plan! We agreed nobody would get hurt!
 * [Bob the Cucumber shoots Larry the Tomato]
 * Spanky: Holy shit! Bob the Cucumber has gone crazy!
 * Bob the Cucumber: Is this crazy?
 * Spanky: No, please!
 * [Bob the Cucumber shoots Spanky]

Ghostesses in the Slot Machine (2.06)

 * Captain Colonicus: Captain Hero, you are in direct violation of code 24601, gambling on your own battles.
 * Captain Hero: What? Since when has that been illegal?
 * Captain Colonicus: For as long as stealing, sexual assault and murder have been.
 * Captain Hero: Those are illegal too? Wow, I really am a terrible superhero!

 * Captain Hero: Folks, the League of Heroes and I tried to take a dive here today, and I think we all learnt an important lesson.
 * Voice: Yeah, you suck!
 * Captain Hero: No, it's that even though we slaughtered the Indians and took their land, we shouldn't let them have casinos because gambling brings out the worst in weak-minded white people. In conclusion...USA! USA! USA!

Super Nanny (2.07)

 * Captain Hero: At last we meet, Super Nanny! So whatcha got? A little X-ray vision, heat vision or, like our president, no vision at all? [Laughs] [In confessional] That's Super Satire.

 * Super Nanny: What's going on in here?
 * Toot: Oh, nothing, Captain Shero is just trying to take my barrette!
 * Captain Hero: It's pronounced Captain "Hero", the 'S' is silent, you hit-head!

Terms of Endearment (2.08)

 * [Wooldoor, dressed as a doctor scans Foxxy until he finds a problem.]
 * Xandir: What is it, doc?
 * Wooldoor: My dear house mates, I'm afraid Foxxy Love does not have a brain tumor. [the other housemates breathe a sigh of relief] I, too, would be relieved, if it didn't happen to be...OPPOSITE DAY!
 * [dramatic music string]
 * Clara: Wait a minute, I'm confused. Does Foxxy have a brain tumor?
 * Wooldoor: No.
 * [dramatic music string]
 * Toot: What the hell? Is it opposite day or dramatic music string day?!
 * Wooldoor: Neither!
 * [dramatic music string]

 * Wooldoor: Boys and girls...the brain! [the other housemates get out notepads] This is the part of the brain that controls your reflexes. [touches the brain and the patient's leg lifts up] This is the part of the brain that controls your bladder. [touches the brain again and blood squirts up from the patient] Man, that guy needs to see a doctor.
 * Spanky: Why? Is red pee bad?
 * Toot: What the hell does this have to do with Foxxy?!
 * Wooldoor: I'm getting to that! This is the part of the brain that controls negative stereotype behavior.
 * [He touches the brain once and the patient lifts up]
 * Male Patient: [As a Jewish stereotype] Oy! I'll sue you for every penny! And then I'll invest it wisely!

 * [banjo playing]
 * Foxxy: Ooh! The ghostes! They's after me! Feets don't fail me now! (she runs onto a door and falls) Ooh!
 * Xandir: What the fuck was that?

Captain Girl (2.09)

 * Captain Hero: By the time I arrived, the Mad-Libber was gone and Captain Girl had been poisoned to death.
 * Xandir: Poisoned? Then why is there blood on her uniform?
 * Captain Hero: It was that time of the month.
 * Xandir: That doesn't really--
 * Captain Hero: WHAT ARE YOU, TWELVE?! Once a month, in the most beautiful and natural process known possible, blood comes flowing out of a woman's butthole. But now, blood will never flow out of Captain Girl's butthole ever again!

 * Clara: A baby, from Nicaragua.
 * Toot: A baby! A baby from Nicaragua! [kisses the baby's face 8 times] Come on, baby from nicaragua, let's go fix mommy's life.

 * Xandir: Toot, where the hell you think you're going?
 * Toot: [carries her vodka bottle] The store. Mommy's completely run out of medicine.
 * Foxxy: Toot, if you don't start takin' care of your child, she gonna be real messed up!
 * Xandir: She's right, Toot. I mean, Ling-Ling was about to kill your baby.
 * Toot: Don't tell how to raise my baby! I know how to keep it safe! [puts herself and her baby inside a ring of fire] Who would dare to enter the Circle of Fire? Toodles! [exits the ring of fire and her coat is caught on fire]

A Tale of Two Cows (2.10)

 * Spanky: Ooh, live-action poo!
 * Foxxy: Wooldoor, have you been going into the live-action forest again?
 * Wooldoor: I, um, well, um, brought it home because I thought they'd make nice slippers.
 * [He steps in the manure as if they were shoes]
 * Captain Hero: It's an honest mistake.
 * [Camera pans down to show that Hero has done the same]

 * Wooldoor: I shot Live-Action Cow and now she's dead! [Cries]
 * Captain Hero: So tell me, bro, did you... [Whisper's into Wooldoor's ear]
 * Wooldoor: What? Why would I do that? She was my friend!
 * Captain Hero: So she's out there dead in the woods, her milky, white, supple udder just lying there in a remote forest clearing? Dibs! [kicks Clara in the leg and runs off]

Xandir and Tim, Sitting in a Tree (2.11)

 * Xandir: Oh Tim! [Jumps into Captain Hero/Tim's arms] Last night was so special! I mean, I've had a lot of gay sex in my life, uhm, a lot of gay se- I mean a lot, a lot a lot a lot of gay se- I've had LOO-LOOOTS of gay sex, HUGE huuge amounts of [Tries to find words] LOOTS! [In confessional] Right, Craig?

 * Spanky: Put the gun down.
 * Pluto: He's the only fucking dog who's good enough to wear fucking pants? Well, I wanna wear the fucking pants at once.

 * Xandir: Oh Tim, you're such a stitch. You're so much more fun than Captain Hero.
 * "Tim": [impersonating Captain Hero] Oh! Look at me! I'm a big, dumb superhero who's big and dumb! Now I'm fondling a girl. Oopsie! She's dead!
 * [Xandir and "Tim" laugh; "Tim" falls into the lake]
 * Xandir: You did not just do that! ["Tim" throws him into the lake; they kiss and the camera pans away from them] It unsnaps in the front.

 * Foxxy: [whispered] Sensors indicate that the T.V. reviewer is at the end of the hall.
 * Spanky: Ok, guys, show no mercy. Remember, these people work in cubicles. So they're already dead inside. Let's move!

The Lemon-AIDS Walk (2.12)

 * Captain Hero: Oh Lord, if there is a sport that I can master, please give me a sign!
 * Foxxy: Hey, y'all, who wants to sponsor me? I'm goin' in the AIDS Walk next week. It's per mile.
 * Captain Hero: Walk? I can walk! [Looks at the folder Foxxy is holding]
 * Foxxy: So you are going to sponsor me? You know it's per mile, right?
 * Captain Hero: Hell's no, I'll be sponsoring you! I'll be sponsoring me, to win the AIDS Walk!
 * Foxxy: The Aid's Walk isn't a competition, asshole, it's a charity! Like "Not Spitting on Ugly People". [spits at Toot in the face] I gave at the office.
 * Captain Hero: I'll practice night and day, and before you know it, I'll do more walking and have more AIDS than you can possibly imagine!

 * Captain Hero: Popeye, are you alright?
 * Popeye: It's time ya knew. I've contracted the deadly AIDS virus from sharing steroid needles. [Shows his hand covered in bloody syringes]
 * Captain Hero: AIDS? How come I've never heard of this AIDS? They should have a walk or something to raise awareness.
 * Popeye: [coughs and wheezes] Get clean for me Cap'n. [Sings] Oh, I'm weak at the finish, 'cause AIDS beats out Spinach, I'm Popeye the dyin' man. [Toots] Of AIDS!

A Very Special Drawn Together Afterschool Special (2.13)

 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] Hey, Xandir. My mama finally got her settlement check and bought herself a double-wide.
 * Captain Hero: [as Xandir's father] Yes, and she deserved it. She gave up ten years of her life and six of her fingers for that chicken plant.
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] You know, I've been practicing this trick where I drink 10 beers and let you do whatever you want to me, I'm getting REAL good at it.

 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Mary Lou?
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] Hey, Xandir's dad. What happened to your eye?
 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Nothing, nothing. What are you doing in this hour? It's getting dark.
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] Play practice went a little late.
 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Hop in, I'll give you a ride home. You like Starship?
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] Who doesn't?
 * [Toot turns on the radio and "We Built This City" by Starship plays]
 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Heater's broke, but it's warm over here. You can slide over nice and close. Mary Lou, I don't know why my boy ever broke up with you. You sure are a pretty little thing.
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] Why, thank you, Xandir's Dad.
 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Now I know you've been with lots of boys, but have you ever been with a man?
 * Clara: [as "Mary Lou Slutsky"] [She sucks Toot's thumb, moans]
 * Toot: [as Xandir's father] Ohhh, yeah...you like my thumb, don't you, bitch? Well, let me show you something almost as big.

Alzheimer's That Ends Well (2.14)

 * Captain Hero: Hey, Xandir, I just got this new wind-up duckie! Its feet actually paddle through the water!
 * Xandir: Let's try it out in the bathtub! [they run up to the bathroom to find Toot about to put a toaster in the water] Why are you killing yourself this time, Toot?
 * Toot: It's my birthday and no one remembered. I'm fat, old, ugly, and everyone hates me!
 * Captain Hero: Hmmm...maybe people hate you because you won't get out their bathtubs when they want to play with their duckies!
 * [Captain Hero uses his heat vision to make Toot run out, and Hero and Xandir are next seen in the bathtub watching the duckie waddle in the water]
 * Xandir: Hey, Hero, I was thinking, we should throw Toot a surprise birthday.
 * Captain Hero: If we're all gonna shout out what we're thinking, I'VE been thinking about paying a prostitute to shove bowling pins up my ass!

 * Octopussoir: Two pieces of advice, princess: one, you won't wanna change your body if you learn to love it. And two, when you wipe, it's front to back.
 * Narrator: An important lesson was learned that day on Wisteria Lane: even the slimiest cunt can get a job in real estate.

The Drawn Together Clip Show (2.15)

 * Jew Producer: So cast, what'cha doin'?
 * Spanky: Same old, same old. What's with you?
 * Jew Producer: Just hosting the season finale.
 * Spanky: How's that going?
 * Jew Producer: Not too well. I shot someone.

 * Jew Producer: Captain Hero, fan rumor has it that your relationship with Xandir has continued since the show ended.
 * Captain Hero: Oh, you got it all wrong, habibe. Xandir had an affair with Tim Tommerson, not me. [everyone laughs] Fine, I'll prove it. Tim!
 * [Tim Tommerson walks out onto the stage. The audience and Xandir are shocked]
 * Xandir: Oh my God, Tim! I thought you loved me!
 * Captain Hero: Why would he love you when he could have all this? [Rips off his shirt and flexes his muscles]
 * Jew Producer: You have something to say?
 * Foxxy Love: Those ain't real! Check these out! [flashes her breasts]

Freaks & Greeks (3.01)

 * Ling-Ling: Father, why? You have so much to live for.
 * Jun-Jee: Oh, nothing bling me joy. I too old to battle, and my cataract make karaoke impossible.
 * [Cut to Jun-Jee in a karaoke bar as "Tequila" plays. When the one lyric comes up on the screen, he struggles to say it]

 * Captain Hero: We're not going to let them destroy us, are we, pledges?
 * Wooldoor & Xandir: Sir, never, sir!
 * Captain Hero: And to prove it, Xandir, lock yourself in a trunk of a car with this bottle of whiskey and don't come out until it's empty! [Hands Xandir a bottle of "Jack Daniels"]
 * Xandir: Sir, yes, sir!
 * Captain Hero: And Wooldoor, you tie one end of this rope to your penis and the other around this brick, and then throw it over the balcony!
 * Wooldoor: Sir! Thank you for making my wish come true, sir!
 * Captain Hero: [Puts on a "Make-a-Wish" cap] There goes one brave kid.

Wooldoor Sockbat's Giggle-Wiggle Funny Tickle Non Traditional Progressive MultiCultural Roundtable! (3.02)

 * [Lyrics to The Happy Stupid Kid Show Theme Song]
 * All: Welcome to Wooldoor's World, where every boy and girl lives with sisters and brothers every race and breed, every personality with tolerance and love. We're all free to be WHEE!!!
 * Wooldoor: So cleanse your teeth and not ethnicity.

 * Captain Hero: Hey bro, what do you think about...bagina?
 * Terminator Guy: Dude, I love the bagina.
 * Captain Hero: Dude! I love the bagina! What do you like to do to the bagina?
 * Terminator Guy: What do you think I like to do to the bagina?
 * Captain Hero: I think you like to fuck it!
 * Terminator Guy: Damn straight, I totally like to to fuck the bagina.
 * Both: Sweet!

 * Wooldoor: I was deader than a racist walrus lost in the Detroit projects after dark.
 * [cut to a walrus surrounded by some black people]
 * Walrus: Don't any of you shwoogies have jobs?
 * Black man 1: The hell did you say?!
 * Black man 2: Let's get him!

Spelling Applebee's (3.03)

 * Captain Hero: [In confessional] We started going out a lot and I think that Clara started to really like me. I was more excited than a passed-out college girl in my bedroom!

 * Clara: Hero, can we talk?
 * Xandir: He has nothing to say to you!
 * Clara: Shut up, Xandir. Can't you have one pair of lips that isn't always flapping in the wind?
 * [Xandir hisses]
 * Clara: I understand if you hate me. But I still think about you...a lot.
 * Captain Hero: Gah, you miss the crashes. That's what you miss.
 * Clara: Sure, they were fun. But people being horribly maimed and disfigured means nothing, if I can't share it with you. Maybe we can give it one more shot, and cause a different kind of crash...between our hearts.
 * Man: [offscreen] Boo!
 * Police Officer: [offscreen] Sir, please come with me.
 * Man: [offscreen] What?! I didn't do anything!
 * Police Officer: [offscreen] I warned you.
 * Man: [offscreen] I can boo if I want, it's a free country-- [getting handcuffed] Get off me!
 * Police Officer: [offscreen] I warned you.
 * Man: [offscreen] You leave me alone! [getting electrocuted by a taser, screaming]
 * Clara: Think about it, Hero. You know where to find me.

 * Clara: OH MY GOD! Sleeping Beauty? Snow White? Ariel?
 * Ariel: I can't feel my fin!
 * Snow White: That's what we get for letting Mulan drive.
 * Clara: Stay with me, Sleeping Beauty!
 * Sleeping Beauty: But I'm tired, so very tired. [she felt dead]
 * Clara: NOOO!!!
 * Captain Hero: Well, once again, Captain Hero has saved the day. And remember, kids, never mess with the emotions of a dangerous lunatic. I'm off! [imitates plane engine, running around]

Unrestrainable Trainable (3.04)

 * Captain She-Ro: Hello?
 * Captain Hero: Pardon me, sir, but did you buy some Zebulonian sperm and give birth to a giant stupidhead?
 * Captain She-Ro: Who wants to know?
 * Captain Hero: I do, for I am the donor. My name is Captain Hero.
 * Captain She-Ro: Captain Hero? Oh no!
 * Captain Hero: Oh no, what?
 * Captain She-Ro: I am your...sister.
 * Xandir: Of course she is.

 * Wooldoor: [offscreen] I feared Clara would keep me a cripple forever. If only I could tell someone what she was doing.
 * Foxxy: Hey, Clara. Hey, Wooldoor. How is your healthy patient-Nurse relationship?
 * Wooldoor: Clara's been poisoning--mmf!
 * Foxxy: What's that?
 * Clara: Foxxy, look behind you! It's Denzel Washington!
 * Foxxy: Denzel! Oh! Where did Denzel go? I guess Denzel musta have an appointment or something, Denzel very busy.
 * Clara: Uh, look, Foxxy! Denzel came back!
 * Foxxy: Denzel! Oh, I missed again! He'd moved quickly. Denzel in excellent physical condition.
 * [Wooldoor's eyes is blinking with some beeping noises]
 * Foxxy: Hey, I think Wooldoor's trying to communicate through blinkin'.
 * Clara: Look, Foxxy! Denzel came back for an unbelievable third time!
 * Foxxy: Denzel!
 * Denzel Washington: Hello there, Foxxy. Clara's trying keep Wooldoor...
 * Clara: Foxxy, look out in the hall! It's another Denzel Washington, with two penises!
 * Foxxy: Double-dong Denzel!
 * Clara: Goodbye, asshole! [she pushes Denzel Washington out to the window breaks and he falls] It's just you and me now, Wooldoor. No one's going to save you.
 * Foxxy: Wait a minute, Clara. There ain't nobody in that hallway but triple dong Wesley Snipes. What is going on here?

N.R.A.y RAY (3.05)

 * Captain Hero: Oh, Wooly Bully and I spent another fun-filled day at the Museum of Tolerance. Every time we go, it reminds us that the world's a tolerant place where nothing ever goes wrong.
 * [All the happiness stops when Wooldoor and Capt. Hero get home and discover the house has been robbed]
 * Wooldoor: OH MY GOD!
 * Captain Hero: We've been robbed! [redos everything he just did backwards] Erehw ecalp tnarelot a s'dlrow eht taht su sdnimer ti og ew emit yreve. Ecnarelot fo Muesum eht ta yad dellif-nuf rehtona tneps I & Yllub Yloow, ho. We've been robbed!
 * Museum of Tolerance worker: It was probably the blacks or the Mexicans.

 * Clara: What are you so happy about? Have you seen how fat you are?
 * Toot: Oh, Clara. You're just jealous cause all my dreams have come true.
 * Clara: You're never going to be happy until you have a dream that has depth and importance. Like having beautiful hair like mine.

 * Clara: [screams] WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME!?
 * Spanky: Clara, you don't look so good. Have you put on weight?
 * Clara: No, Toot stole my beautiful, beautiful hair!
 * Toot: I didn't steal it, I just woke up with your hair attractively stapled to my scalp.
 * Clara: I'm gonna have those Jew producers throw you out of this house forever!

 * Xandir: Hero, using assault rifles and armour-piercing bullets to hunt? Don't you think that's a bit excessive?
 * Captain Hero: Screw you all! It's my right to use these weapons anyway I please, and nothing is going to change my mind.
 * [doorbell rings]
 * Bambi: You killed my mother!
 * Captain Hero: Sucks to be you!

 * Bambi: [cries] I'm so sad and so cute! I miss mommy!
 * Captain Hero: I know, broham, but I was just hunting. Ever since the prehistoric cave Jews hunted down Jesusaurses, slaughtering defenceless creatures has been our nation's pastime.
 * Bambi: I'm not saying you need to stop hunting…
 * Captain Hero: Bitchin'!
 * Bambi: But using assault rifles and armor-piercing bullets is just not fair.
 * Captain Hero: Huh?
 * Bambi: Just give us a fighting chance, Mr. Hero. Maybe mommy would have lived! [crying]

 * Bambi: Oh, friends?! Oh, friends?! Gather round! I have some stupendous news for all of us. I was able to convince Mr. Hero to rid the world of all assault rifles and armor-piercing bullets.
 * [deers cheering]
 * Bambi: That's right, loyal servants, our plan is working. And now, the war begins!

 * Wooldoor: Ever wonder why African-American black men are so attracted to large posteriors? Good day, I am Professor Wooldoor Sockbat, here to explain this completely racist phenomenon. [black-and-white footage is shown of an African tribesman being chased by a lion] For centuries, natives found large, roaming badonkadonks to be safe havens from the dangers of the wild. [The tribesman jumps into a large butt, stopping the lion in its tracks.] Their love of huge asses has been written into their genetic code. Even they don't know why... they just know. See you next time, when we explore why Jews have big noses! Is it because air is free?

 * Bambi: Guess again! It's me, Bambi!
 * Captain Hero: Just because I'm dating your mother it doesn't mean we have to hang out all the time.
 * Bambi: You humans have hunted us since the dawn of time. And now, it is our turn to hunt you! Attack!

Mexican't Buy Me Love/Captain Hero and the Cool Kids (3.06)

 * Toot: I thought we were going to be caged up until we died, like those stupid chickens!
 * Ling-Ling: The chickens! We must go back and save them!
 * Toot: Screw that! I'm gonna watch my OWN back from now on! If only I could watch my own feet! [Moves her boobs around, but is unable to see her feet]
 * Ling-Ling: We must turn back now and save the chickens, for they are Ling-Ling's brothers. But if you only care about yourself, then fine, go.
 * Toot: Later, asshole! Meep-meep! [takes off in "Road-Runner" style, but only gets a couple feet, falling flat on her chest and gasping and panting heavily; a vulture then flies in and lands on her butt]
 * Vulture: Jesus, how long has this thing been dead?!

 * Foxxy: [In confessional] So I was all alone at the dance. And worse, the meteor was about to smash into the Earth! And if the movie "Deep Impact" had anything to go by, the whole planet was about to become boring and unwatchable.
 * Foxxy: Captain Hero, you got to stop that meteor!
 * Captain Hero: Can't you see I'm already one knuckle deep into fifth base?
 * [Clara sexually moaning]
 * Captain Hero: Shoo! [he pushes Foxxy]
 * [Everyone laughing]
 * Foxxy: That's it! [in microphone] Hold up, everybody! Now I know y'all think Captain Hero is real cool.
 * [Everyone agreed-talking]
 * Foxxy: But he ain't.
 * [Everyone disagreed-talking]
 * Foxxy: I don't know what I was thinking. I fooled y'all into thinking Hero was cool by pretending to be his girlfriend so he would stop that meteor!
 * [Everyone gasps]
 * Captain Hero: Wait! I can explain!
 * Steve from Long Island: Oh, really? Then explain this now. [tears off Hero's Lando costume]
 * Captain Hero: Spanky? Clara? Steve from Long Island? [goes over to Xandir and Wooldoor] Oh, hey, man. You were right. The cool kids are assholes.
 * Xandir: You shit on my house, man.
 * Captain Hero: I know, I know.
 * Xandir: You shit on my house!
 * Captain Hero: Yeah, you said that already.

Lost in Parking Space, Part One (3.07)

 * Clara: Oh, really? How do you explain this? [phone line disconnected] The phone wasn't even plugged in. [makes ghost noises]
 * Foxxy: Uh, Clara, is that Kirk Cameron hiding behind that plant?
 * [Camera shows Kirk Cameron hiding behind a houseplant]
 * Clara: Kirk, you're busted! Run!
 * Kirk Cameron: To learn more, visit my website wayofthemaster.com. [jumps out of the window] Catch me, Jesus!
 * ''[All that's heard is a "thump!"']'

 * Wooldoor: Wait, I'll go get Clara.
 * Foxxy: Clara? I'm sick of that Bible-thumping bitch. And besides, what's the fun of a group activity when you can't exclude somebody?
 * Excludie: You can say that again.
 * Toot: Shut up, Excludie! Get back in your box!
 * Excludie: Aww... [walks off and goes back into his box]
 * Voice: Get out, Excludie! We don't want you!
 * Excludie: Aww... [walks off]

Lost in Parking Space, Part Two (3.08)

 * [Lyrics to Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie]
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Nathan: It's a doosie of a word.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie: Have some booze and lay a turd in public view.
 * Nathan: Why the hell not?
 * Ernie: No need to give a flying fuck about what anyone else might say.
 * Nathan: My toilet is a tire teens set me on fire and you're off the grid and the tin foil hat blocks the government from accessing the chip in your brain.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Nathan: Every dumpster is a smorgasbord.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: The mean streets are your room and board.
 * Ernie: The world's your oyster that we know.
 * Xandir: When you take up the life of a derelict hobo.
 * Nathan: Living on the easy streets where the Free Masons can't detect you.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Xandir: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.
 * Ernie and Nathan: Scumma Bumma Grubba Moochie.

 * Hot Topic Manager: [Walks into torture room] What part of "we need to evacuate" do you not understand?
 * Clara: Not today, mister! [Cuts off his arm]
 * Foxxy: Nice work, Clara! Now let's get- [Clara cuts off his other arm] Okay, I think you got him...
 * Clara: [Between hacks] I...MUST...GET...INTO...HEAVEN!
 * Foxxy: Is you done?
 * Clara: Not sure...how do you know when you're done killing something?
 * Foxxy: When your man pick you up at the clinic and take you drinking at the club.

 * Wooldoor: Fine, if we must, we must. But before we eat Ling-Ling, let's take a moment to remember the good times.
 * Toot: I’ll always remember our trip to Paris... [The housemates are all seen together in Paris] Guys, this trip has really bringed us together.
 * Ling-Ling: Yes, Ling-Ling comfortable enough to share greatest fear. No matter what happen, please, no eat Ling-Ling.
 * Wooldoor: And remember when we all got fucking wasted on the roof? ''[Next the housemates are sitting on the roof looking at the stars] Oh look, a shooting star!
 * Ling-Ling: Ling-Ling only wish is for roommates not to eat his body when he die.
 * Captain Hero: Oh, and remember that time when Ling-Ling learnt to speak English?
 * [Next, they are in the living room listening to Ling-Ling]
 * Ling-Ling: [Speaking in English] What's wrong with you people?! Why don't you listen to me? Ling-Ling religion very specific. If body even so dead, he should not be eaten!
 * Spanky: Well, guys, let's dig in. [Hands out chopsticks] It’s what Ling-Ling would’ve wanted.

Charlotte's Web of Lies (3.09)

 * Ling Ling: What was Ling Ling thinking?! Battle monster not meant to dance!
 * Gash: Or is he?
 * Ling Ling: Gash! What are you doing here?
 * Gash: I came to see you dance.
 * Ling Ling: But you said Ling Ling could never be a dancer.
 * Gash: I was just jealous. I, too, always wanted to be a dancer as well, also, but I didn't have the talent, so I tortured you relentlessly until you became a sociopathic killer, crushing all your dreams. My bad.

 * Captain Hero: DAMN YOU SCROTO! Aww...
 * Wooldoor: His name is Scroto?
 * Captain Hero: Yes.
 * Wooldoor: So that's what your arch-nemesis does?
 * Captain Hero: Yep.
 * Wooldoor: No bank robberies?
 * Captain Hero: Uh-uh.
 * Wooldoor: Or blowing up the planet?
 * Captain Hero: Nope.
 * Wooldoor: He just tricks superheroes into washing his balls?
 * Captain Hero: Not all superheroes. Just me...just me.
 * Wooldoor: What a strange, strange villain.

Breakfast Food Killer (3.10)

 * Toot: Is this where the auditions are?
 * Frankenberry: Don't be shy, come in. I'm Frankenberry, the president of the cereal empire. This is Tony Tiger, and of course, you know Violent Retard from Violent Retard Flakes.
 * Toot: There isn't any cereal called Violent Retard Flakes.
 * Frankenberry: You tell him.

 * Toot: Hey, you cereal mascot dickbag! Toot Braunstein is gonna destroy you and the entire cereal empire with these special UPC codes!
 * Spanky: There's nothing special about UPC Codes. Why, they're everywhere! And have been since 1971. First suggested by Wallace Flint in 1922, the Uniform Product Code or "UPC" was developed–[an annoyed Captain Hero hits him on the head] I like to pee on things!

 * [Lyrics to Carousel of Progress]
 * All: Now is the time. Now is the best time. Now is the best time of your life. There's so much to cheer for. Be glad you're here for the best time of your life!

Drawn Together Babies (3.11)

 * [Lyrics to Drawn Together Babies Theme Song]
 * All: Ooh wee ooh wee ooh ooh wee ooh. Drawn Together Babies were cute little girls and boys. We use imaginations like athletes use steroids.
 * Captain Hero: I like to follow the rules.
 * Princess Clara: I think tolerance is cool.
 * Toot Braunstein: Yay, friendliness!
 * Spanky Ham: And cleanliness!
 * Foxxy Love: I like my chastity.
 * Walter Sagget: No goofing 'round for me.
 * Xandir: I like cars and girls!
 * Sid: I like to sleep on my stomach!
 * Ling-Ling: And I'm also in this song.
 * All: Drawn Together Babies, we poopy in our beds. We are so adorable, you'll want to smash our heads in. Drawn Together Babies!

 * Mommy: Remember, kids, lying is wrong.
 * All: We're sorry, mommy.
 * Mommy: Kids, this is Charlotte, your babysitter.
 * Charlotte the Babysitter: Hi, Drawn Together Babies!
 * Mommy: Now, you be good little boys and girls, and one adopted homo while mommy and daddy are at court-ordered Therapy.
 * Daddy: Sweetie, I don't wanna be late, so could you move your fat ass?
 * Mommy: Shut the hell up, you drunken, unemployed bastard! You're gonna wake up Sid!
 * [cut to Sid's bassinet, where the buzzing of flies can be heard, indicating that he has passed away]
 * Xandir: Uh, Mrs. Babysitter, do you want to play with us and our imaginating...
 * Charlotte the Babysitter: [angrily] Listen, you little bastards! My boyfriend, Chad Huffington, heir to the Huffington Pants fortune, is coming over, so you assholes better shut the hell up and stay in your fucking rooms!
 * Captain Hero: Don't worry, ma'am, I'll patrol the hallway and make sure they stay put.
 * Charlotte the Babysitter: Spoken like a true ass-kissing adopted homo.
 * Walter Sagget: This babysitter's even worse than the one who liked to tickle us with her cigarette.
 * Clara: Aww, I'm not ready to go to bed.
 * Foxxy: Me neither!
 * Spanky: Guys, we don't have to go to bed. I got a plan.

 * Xandir: Captain Hero is patrolling these hallways, at precisely 9:16, when he turns down the corridor, I'll signal you by shouting like some slutty cheerleader when I give her a shocker!
 * Spanky: Good, Clara.
 * Clara: To make a babysitter come, I'll cry even louder than daddy after he found out about black daddy!

 * Xandir: Ooh, shocker! Ew! The pinky action is what makes it so unique!
 * Clara: Oh my God! Mrs. Drawn Together, you whore! And tyrone, I paid you to kill her, not fuck her!
 * Charlotte the Babysitter: Hey, dickwads, I thought I told you to...[trips over the babies' trap] Whoa, whoa, whooaaaa! [Last quote before presumed death]

 * Spanky: It must be the babysitter's boyfriend, Chad Huffington.
 * Toot: Heir to the Huffington Pants Fortune?
 * Spanky: The same.
 * Walter Sagget: What are we gonna do?
 * Girls: I got a plan!
 * Foxxy: I had a plan first.
 * Clara: No, I said I had a plan first!
 * Spanky: Well, both of you seem equally qualified, But I say we listen to Foxxy since black people deserve a helping hand.

 * Xandir: My water broke!
 * Rebellious Chase: Oh my God!
 * Chad Huffington: We have to get her to the hospital!
 * Rebellious Chase: Don't forget the birthing mix! Birthing mix!
 * Chad Huffington: Oh my! Let's go, let's go!
 * Xandir: Uh, guys? Did you forget something?
 * Chad Huffington and Rebellious Chase: Sorry.

 * Foxxy: Walter, what happened to your face?
 * Wooldoor: What the fuck happened to your face?!

Nipple Ring-Ring Goes to Foster Care (3.12)

 * Foxxy: We went to the Rice Museum/Holocaust Memorial, and Daddy got me this awesome T-shirt! It says, "Never forget..." [turns around]
 * Uncle Benny: "...to salt the water before boilin' the rice."

 * Captain Hero: This has gotten so good! You know that kid I've been fucking with?
 * Xandir: Um, yeah, you mean you?
 * Captain Hero: Yes. It turns out he's unstable! [suddenly enraged] WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?!
 * Xandir: Because you're talking to me.
 * Captain Hero: [sobbing] Then why won't you listen?!? [calm again] Anyhoo...

Toot Goes Bollywood/Foxxy and the Gang Bang (3.13)

 * Phat Allen: Boy, Foxxy. They ought to call you a German pornstar's mouth.
 * Foxxy: German pornstar's mouth?
 * Phat Allen: 'Cause you full of shit!
 * ''[Phat Allen and his gang laugh]'

 * Foxxy: What the hell is wrong with you, Toot?! Can't you see I'm bangin' Astro?
 * Scooby-Doo: Ri rain't Rastro, ritch!
 * Toot: Jesus, Foxxy, you're such a whore! You've had more infected wangs in you than a Shanghai hospital!
 * Scooby-Doo: Roh ro you ridn't!
 * Foxxy: You just jealous because you couldn't get screwed at a convention of Jewish insurance salesmen!
 * Scooby-Doo: Rou rid rot rust ro there!

American Idol Parody Clip Show/The Elimination Special, Part II: The Elimination (3.14)

 * Jew Producer: Toot, you suck, yet you keep returning. How do you explain this phenomenon?
 * Toot: Well, how do you explain your fugly face!?
 * Jew Producer: I was burned in a horrible accident. It's quite sad, really.

 * [Lyrics to One House]
 * Captain Hero, Wooldoor, Xandir, and Ling-Ling: One house to hold us all.
 * Toot, Foxxy, Spanky, and Clara: Eight different cartoon characters.
 * Captain Hero, Wooldoor, Xandir, and Ling-Ling: Letting it all hang out.
 * Toot, Foxxy, Spanky, and Clara: In front of one million cameras.
 * All: We're Drawn Together!
 * Everyone except Clara: Yeah!
 * [Clara excessively holds the last note]

 * Jew Producer: Captain Hero, the votes are in, and you are...safe!
 * Captain Hero: Oh my God! I love you, America! So why shouldn't we have a fucking baby?!

 * [Lyrics to Labia Unplugged]
 * Foxxy: La la la la labia baby you've got something for me.
 * Clara: In your wizard sleeve.
 * Both: La la la la labia baby you've got something for me.
 * Clara: Some sweet PT.
 * Both: Hoochie coochie gitchy gitchy yeah yeah yeah. Gotta snatcha gunna catcha yatcha yeah yeah yeah.
 * Foxxy: Binja minja.
 * Clara: Bearded clam.
 * Foxxy: Furry burger.
 * Clara: Smiley Bam.
 * Both: La la la la labia baby you've got something for me.
 * Clara: Oh, yesiree.
 * Both: Fluffy muffy stuffy in the yeah yeah yeah. I've got a fever for a beaver weaver yeah yeah yeah.
 * Foxxy: Honey pot.
 * Clara: Peachy pie.
 * Octopussior: Take it to the Y-clef.
 * Both: La la la la la labia. For me.
 * Foxxy: Yeah!
 * Both: La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la labia.
 * Clara: Some sweet PT.
 * Foxxy: You got something
 * Both: La la la la labia la la la la la labia.
 * Foxxy: Baby! Baby! Labi! Labia! My Babia! Got something for me.
 * Both: Labia my babia got something. Labia!

 * Toot: (offscreen) Hey, assholes, thanks for watching!

Voice cast

 * Tara Strong - Princess Clara, Toot Braunstein, Child Services Woman, Wilma Flintstone, Timmy the Baby Paper, Josie McCoy, Captain Hero's Mother, Unusually Flexible Girl, Nicaraguan Baby Girl, TV Reviewer, Charlie Brown, Linus Van Pelt, Ariel, Snow White, Bambi, Gwyneth Paltrow, Mom, and EW Critic
 * James Arnold Taylor - Wooldoor Sockbat, The Jew Producer, Fudge Judge, Steve from Long Island, Genie, God, Jeffrey, Captain Hero's Son, Fred Flintstone, Violent Retard, Cereal Commercial Boy, and Chad Huffington
 * Cree Summer - Foxxy Love, Strawberry Sweetcake, Evil Stepmother, Daphne Blake, Ni-Pul, Supernanny, Old Woman #2, Sleeping Beauty, Georgina Georgiopolis, Captain She-Ro, Queen of Mexico, Old Woman #1, Fran Drescher, Letta Lame, Hindu Mother, Foxxy Dark, Foxxy Phat, Foxxy Yella, Lil Foxxy, and Barbara
 * Abbey DiGregorio - Ling-Ling, Sweatshop Kids Leader, and Cereal Commercial Girl
 * Jack Plotnick - Xandir P. Wifflebottom
 * Adam Carolla - Spanky Ham
 * Jess Harnell - Captain Leslie Hero, Octopussoir, Jun-Lee, Bizarro Captain Hero, Hindu Pizza Man, King of Insurance, Malcolm Exposition, The Terminator, Hot Topic Guy, Musical Director, Hulk, Dig'em Frog, General Mills, Dad, Megatron, Hindu Father, Bill Cosby, Cap'n Crunch, and Mickey Mouse
 * Alex Borstein - Lois Griffin, Jelly Donuts Leader, AIDS Walk Coordinator, and Clerk at Candy Store
 * Paget Brewster - Child Services Woman
 * Chris Edgerly - Snagglepuss, Elmer Fudd, Buckie Bucks, Board of Education, Doctor, and Captain Colonicus
 * Jason Huber - Gash, Scroto, Franken Berry, and Sugar Bear
 * Billy West - Mall Security Guard, Popeye, Stimpson "Stimpy" J. Cat, and Denzel Washington
 * Carlos Mencia - King of Mexico
 * Ian Ziering - Chase Huffington
 * Debi Mae West - Vajoana (Joan Rivers)
 * Will Forte - Kirk Cameron
 * Jonathan Kimmel - The King (Clara's father)
 * Kath Soucie - Charlotte the Babysitter

title: Drawn Together


text:
Wyatt Earp (film)

 is a 1994 American semi-biographical Western film directed by and co-written by Kasdan and Dan Gordon.

Wyatt Earp

 * I won't be arrested today. You threw us, Johnny.
 * The fight has now commenced, go to fighting or get away!
 * Mind me now, Mannen, put up those guns and go on home.
 * I think you came here to make a fight with me, and if you did, you can have one here right now.
 * I am a friend of Doc Holliday, because when I was city marshal of Dodge City, Kansas, he came to my rescue and saved my life, when I was surrounded by desperados.
 * I was tired of being threatened by Ike Clanton and his gang. I believed from what they had said to others and to me, and from their movements, that they intended to assassinate me the first chance they had, and I thought if I had to fight for my life against them, I had better make them face me in an open fight.
 * You damned dirty cur thief, you have been threatening our lives, and I know it. I think I should be justified shooting you down any place I should meet you, but if you are anxious to make a fight, I will go anywhere on earth to make a fight with you, even over to the San Simon among your own crowd.
 * I did not intend to fight unless it became necessary in self defense, and in the performance of official duty. When Billy Clanton and Frank McLowry drew their pistolsl I knew it was a fight for life, and I drew and fired in defense of my own life and the lives of my brothers and Doc Holliday.
 * Doc [Holliday] was a dentist whom necessity had made a gambler; a gentleman whom disease had made a frontier vagabond; a philosopher whom life had made a caustic wit; a long lean ash-blond fellow nearly dead with consumption, and at the same time the most skillful gambler and the nerviest, speediest, deadliest man with a gun that I ever knew.
 * We had no YMCA's. [To biographer Stuart Lake, when asked late in life why he'd spent so much time in saloons.]
 * In a gun fight... You need to take your time in a hurry
 * Fast is fine but accuracy is final. You must learn to be slow in a hurry

Nicholas Earp

 * Remember this, all of you. Nothing counts so much as blood. The rest are just strangers.

Doc Holiday

 * There is no hope,my friend. There is only what we do.

Others on Wyatt Earp

 * Wyatt Earp is one of the few men I personally knew in the West in the early days, whom I regarded as absolutely destitute of physical fear. I have often remarked, and I am not alone in my conclustions, that what goes for courage in a man is generally the fear of what others will think of him-- in other words, personal bravery is largely made up of self-respect, egotism, and an apprehension of the opinions of others. Wyatt Earp's daring and apparent recklessness in time of danger is wholly characteristic; personal fear doesn't enter into the equation, and when everything is said and done, I believe he values his own opinion of himself more than that of others, and it is his own good report that he seeks to preserve. . . . He never at any time in his career resorted to the pistol excepting in cases where such a course was absolutely necessary. Wyatt could scrap with his fists, and had often taken all the fight out of bad men, as they were called, with no other weapons than those provided by nature. -Bat Masterson

 * [Wyatt] Earp is a man who never smiled or laughed. He was the most fearless man I ever saw. . . . He is an honest man. All officers here who were associated with him declare that he is honest, and would have decided according to his belief in the face of an arsenal. -Dick Cogdell

 * Wyatt Earp was a wonderful officer. He was game to the last ditch and apparently afraid of nothing. The cowmen all respected him and seemed to recognize his superiority and authority at such times as he had to use it. -Jimmy Cairns

Dialogue

 * Tom McLaury: If you want to fight, I'll make a fight with you anywhere.
 * Wyatt Earp: All right, make a fight right here.
 * Wyatt slaps McLaury
 * Wyatt Earp: Jerk your gun, use it.

 * Johnny Behan: I will have to arrest you.
 * Wyatt Earp: Any decent officer can arrest me, but that you or none your kind must not try it.

 * Johnny Behan: I want to see you Wyatt.
 * Wyatt Earp: If you're not careful, you'll see me once too often, Johnny.

Cast

 * - teenage Wyatt
 * John Doe (musician) -
 * Mark Harmon -
 * - Allie Earp
 * as
 * as Bessie Earp
 * - Mr. Sutherland
 * - Mrs. Sutherland
 * Rex Lins -
 * Gabriel Folse -
 * - Francis O'Rourke
 * - Urilla Sutherland
 * - Virginia Earp
 * - Lou Earp
 * - Sally
 * as
 * as Bessie Earp
 * - Mr. Sutherland
 * - Mrs. Sutherland
 * Rex Lins -
 * Gabriel Folse -
 * - Francis O'Rourke
 * - Urilla Sutherland
 * - Virginia Earp
 * - Lou Earp
 * - Sally
 * - Virginia Earp
 * - Lou Earp
 * - Sally
 * - Sally

title: Wyatt Earp (film)